Three children found dead

[RedandChecker]

m.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-27122410

Very, very sad

[DawnMumsnet]

Hello everyone,

We understand there is a lot of concern about this terribly sad case, but we would ask folks not to post speculatively.

We will be removing any such posts. Please take care when posting on this thread.

[expatinscotland]

You know, you can know a million people who are life-limited and defied odds. Until YOU have lived like that, day after day, as their carer, it's beyond the pale to criticise when you go back to your healthy life.

[theywillgrowup]

i will not judge this women

only she will know the circumstances to this

maybe she felt this was the solution

my point is we dont know,but in her mind at the time this was the way she was thinking

i couldnt even guess how this lady was thinking

a tragedy for everybody

[BorisJohnsonsHairdresser]

It is a shame there are is no charity out there that allows people to volunteer to help a family including a child or parent with additional needs.

It is a situation a bit like food banks, not enough funding.

[fidelineish]

Poor children, poor woman, whatever the specifics turn out to be.

[Obstacles]

We don't know just how poorly those children were or if they were in any pain. Quite possibly they could have lived for many more years and enjoy much about their lives. children with even severe disabilities and illnesses live worthwhile even happy lives.

I don't condemn the mother. I have not walked in her shoes.

So terribly sad that their lives have been cut short. Rip little ones.

[antiabz]

Those poor children, they look so happy in the pictures.

[hazeyjane]

manic, news reports have stated that the 3 children had spinal muscular atrophy, type I of this condition (which it almost certainly would have been - as this is the type which is from birth) have a very short life expectancy (usually early childhood).It is progressive and degenerative as muscles supporting feeding and breathing lose their strength.

[Burmahere]

I have compassion for all involved, the whole situation is just horrific.

[AndHarry]

Boris I think people can volunteer through HomeStart.

[manicinsomniac]

eek, why am the only one who's been deleted?! It looks like I said something awful or in contempt of court now!!

As far as I'm aware I was very careful not to insult, said that I wished I could feel more sympathy and said that I was surprised at the knowledge others seemed to have because, as far as I knew, we had no details at all. I definitely didn't speculate in the way that many of these other posts seem to.

Feeling very guilty and uncertain now. But I don't think I did anything wrong!

Thanks Hazeyjane that wasn't on the BBC link.

[hazeyjane]

Maybe mnhq made a mistake - I asked for my post to be deleted!!

[BorisJohnsonsHairdresser]

The last I knew Homestart was up to age 5 and some of them have closed down, due to funding issues.

[LadyMaryLikesCake]

Poor family

I think there's certain media newsgroups which publish info before it's been officially released which is very naughty, so it depends on where the info about the children's conditions came from, IYKWIM.

[theywillgrowup]

this view will be unpopular with many but

i know of a lady that had 3dc's on her own,no dad about,no family near

she had mild mental health at first but as the yeas went buy it became worse,no support and was afraid to be honest at how bad things had become with her MH with her GP and would not contact SS

as the years went on it all got to much and started suicidal thoughts,but she worked out in her mind that 2 of the 3 kids were well into their teens,and starting out on their own lives

the youngest was 6 and she could not bear the thought of him being so young without her

in her eyes nobody could love him and look after him like she could,so she was on the verge of imagining if she committed suicide he would come with her,as she couldnt leave him in her mind thats how she was thinking

luckily she had a gp appointment and totally broke down telling her everything,she was refered to a mental health worker,ss were bought in,all the family have been kept together and she is getting the help and support she was crying out for

maybe this lady couldnt go on but didnt want to leave her children either

i just wish this lady had felt able to ask for help,for herself also,saddest thing ive read for awhile

life is so bloody cruel

[IHaveSeenMyHat]

I just cannot imagine what it must be like caring for three profoundly disabled, life limited children. It must be hell.

I have nothing but sympathy for the poor mother AND the poor father and older child. Just the most horrific tragedy.

[Bowlersarm]

No judging from me.

Poor woman, poor family.

[HeartStarCircleSquare]

A family brought three children in to the world unknowingly with an illness that would eventually kill them. That their mother either through desperation or through compassion felt she needed to end their lives...how can that make anyone feel anything but sadness for the whole family? I hope the father finds it in him to stand with her.

[edamsavestheday]

It's clearly a tragedy. What an awful condition, and to discover your dd has it while you are carrying twins who also turn out to have it... poor family. I'm not judging her.

[Northernlurker]

I know what you mean Everlong and tbh I don't get why anybody feels anger is appropriate here.
I love my daughters very deeply, as any parent does. I have asked myself (in those daft, dark moments we all have) could I kill for them? In all honesty, if they were endangered then yes I think I could. The logical extension of that thought is 'if I thought it was to save them pain could I kill them?' That's a dark and terrible place but I don't think any parent should rule out finding in themselves those depths. Grief and fear are very powerful. What I'm saying is nobody should ever think they couldn't do what seems desperate and repugnant to them because it's circumstance that dictates this kind of action, not character.

[Trojanhouse]

So so sad

[2old2beamum]

Please listen to expat she really knows!

As a mother who has had 3 adopted DC's die, this mum deserves compassion and our love, maybe I could have prevented my beautiful children so much pain if I have had the courage but I didn't.

[ShelaghTurner]

Very local to me too. Absolutely heartbreaking, how utterly tragic :(