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Original poster

Sorry, but my children bore me to death!

354 replies

MrsBigD · 26/07/2006 16:54

Not meaning to start a major debate here (that already seems to be happening on the articles own board), just thought it was quite well written and touching on one of the things 'us bad mums' don't dare bring up... imho she's a bit extreme in her attitude but simultaneously have to admit that I have had some of the thoughts myself at times

here is the article

OP posts:
poopy · 27/07/2006 02:48

Haven't read the whole thread but did skim the article.
She sounds like a prime cow to me tbh. I do find bits of parenting boring ... I am not that into playgroups and find the continuous thinking of what to feed my children healthy and nutritious food pretty mind numbing but I do it because that is what it is to be a parent.
My life changed when I had children because I had to think of other people instead of myself ... it was a hard transition but a necessary one. How can I possibly bring up well balanced children if I only think about myself.
The fact that she has a nanny and talks about 'prep' as opposed to 'homework' says a lot too
It is a question of balance. I run a business and have interests that don't involve my children but I do that without compromise to their family life ... I really feel I have the best of both worlds and as a result I appreciate my children which this woman clearly fails to do.

noddyholder · 27/07/2006 07:20

I do agree that some people don't enjoy those things we all get sick of them at times and I have absolutely no patience with certain kids that come here with ds but I agree the article was typical DM garbage written to provoke a reaction.I was just commenting on the fact that in any of these threads there is the underlying impression that anyone who is a sahm or who loves being with their kids is somehow missing out and it is seen as a negative thing

SueW · 27/07/2006 07:47

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at OP's request.

kiskidee · 27/07/2006 08:14

article dead boring.

aragon · 27/07/2006 08:48

My goodness - obviously her sons cannot read or they'd be so sad. She claims to love them but cannot be bothered to do anything with them. There's a difference between being bored and taking no interest whatsoever.

I have a DS too and I love him to bits. In the future when he's in a football team I shall be there on the touchline beaming with maternal pride - and it won't be boring.

ssd · 27/07/2006 09:23

didn't read all the article, too too predictable,, her double barrelled name, the nanny, the boys bloody pretentious names, the first at uni, yawn yawn, what's amazing is she must have got paid for this crap.

aragon · 27/07/2006 09:27

She IS Polly Filler - I think Private Eye should be told.

Greensleeves · 27/07/2006 09:27

I was thinking of Harry Enfield's Classic Bores

hunkermunker · 27/07/2006 09:30

Do you know, I found this pretty inspirational reading.

Not that I think she's anything other than a dull old troutface, but it made me realise that I take SO much joy in my children - I am actually quite good at this mothering thing.

Shit, I'm crying

To explain a bit - I've been having such a horribly rough time lately - feeling drudge-like and finding loads of my life dull and irritating.

But I can't imagine not being interested in the boys. God, what kind of woman is she?

foxinsocks · 27/07/2006 09:30

lol

unfortunately, the article has had its desired effect because there was even a bit on BBC news this morning about it (with another parenting journalist and I think a mother, missed who she was).

foxinsocks · 27/07/2006 09:31

sorry hunker wasn't lol at you but at aragon

ssd · 27/07/2006 10:00

hunker agree with you totally

of course bits can be boring - life can be boring - but what makes it all so special and worthwhile is the closeness and love you feel for your children and the way they can make your day fantastic when they say something other people would find quite ordinary!

this woman obviously doesn't have this connection to her kids and is missing out on all this.

Bugsy2 · 27/07/2006 10:06

Wowee, amazed at how strongly some of you feel about this article. Yet another piece of lifestyle journalism, designed to be provocative.
I'm not sure exactly why I had children - it just seemed like the appropriate thing to do. I thought I would be a fantastic arty, crafty mummy - but I am so not. I am definitely finding motherhood easier to cope with as my children get older but the toddler years were really tedious. I am bored after about 5 seconds of doing playdoh, colouring, painting, puzzle making or any of those activities. The extra 29 mins & 55 seconds of me sitting there is all show. I literally want to tear my hair out with frustration.
I adore my children & love them in a fierce kind of way, but I really don't find them endlessly fascinating. I hated toddler groups, hate birthday parties when I had to stay.
However, admitting these things does often feel taboo. Alot of other mothers immediately conclude that you are selfish, self obsessed and shouldn't have had children!!!!

batters · 27/07/2006 10:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bugsy2 · 27/07/2006 10:31

Tsk, tsk Batters - you should have had children then!!!

Bugsy2 · 27/07/2006 10:32

Arghh! "shouldn't" instead of should! (Can't even managed to be a smart arse successfully!)

threebob · 27/07/2006 10:53

I think she could have tried harder to find common ground with her children, especially as they got older.

So you don't like playdough (or whatever), take them to an art gallery or something you do enjoy.

kittywits · 27/07/2006 10:53

Couldn't read the whole article. The woman made me furious. Yes it can be very tedious and boring bringing up young children. But FFS she chose to have them. They aren't pets you can ignore!!!! If you have children you have a life long responsibity towards them . In a fair world Women like her would be allowed to conceive. Poor bl**y kids. I reckon they'll end up really resenting her as they get older. I'm no saint, but I made the decision to have my children and their needs come before mine, end of story.

Bugsy2 · 27/07/2006 10:57

and also just to be provocative myself, I hate this idea that you should only have children if you are going to be a SAHM, dedicated, cake baking, arty, crafty, 100% there all of the time kind of mummy?
Maybe this woman will have a great relationship with her children when they are adults - why shouldn't she? I cannot think of one single male contempory who has ever moaned about the fact that his mother didn't spend enough time playing lego or monopoly with him. Alot of mothers of my generation & previous generations had absolutely no time to play with their children. They were too busy sloping nappies in an out of buckets & pushing them through mangles, out buying groceries on a daily basis, darning mending & sewing clothes, beating rugs & carpets etc etc. This total devotion to your children thing is a really new concept.

Iklboo · 27/07/2006 10:58

Saw a clip of her on breakfast tv this morning. She looks a right sour faced dried up bint.
Bet when her kids get older and don't want to spend time with her, she'll write another article bleating on about how selfish her kids are and don't wait on her hand & foot etc etc etc
Someone should take all her money off her so she can't have an nanny & stuff and she'd have to think of cheapo things to do with her children instead

Enid · 27/07/2006 11:02

she is spoilt and spiritually bereft

IMO

kittywits · 27/07/2006 11:04

I'm not of the mind that to be a good mum you need to SAH and bake cakes, but you have to show somw kind of active interest in your children and this woman clearly doesn't. Women can do more things with their kids now because modern appliances free up the time they would have spent "beating rugs". This woman chooses not to spend time with her children. In previous generations this was something the aristocracy did.
I'm also sure that there are alot of adults who bemoan the fact that their parents didn't give them enough of the correct attention. I'm one of them.

Bugsy2 · 27/07/2006 11:09

But why should we choose to spend time with our children, just because we are no longer tied to the kitchen sink? Why do people, particularly other mothers, perceive it as so bad that a woman might want to do other things?
I am pretty sure that every single one of us could find something that we feel our parents did wrong - that is the thankless nature of parenting! Our children will probably castigise us for not allowing them more freedowm, from being so constantly by their side that have mother complexes & heaven only knows what else. Popular science will undoubtably have swung in a different direction & we'll be scuppered somehow or other!!!!

muminaquandary · 27/07/2006 11:10

"Frankly, as long as you've fed them, sheltered them and told them they are loved, children will be fine"

Hmmm.. yes, but given that she has so mnay material advantages she can do so much more: that sort of comment is better suited to people who really have to struggle to spend any time with their children because annoying things like having to earn money or cope with difficult family situations get in the way ......

yuk. and to think her children will be able to read about what a selfish cow she really is and how little she loved them.

groggymama · 27/07/2006 11:11

sorry not managed to read all thread but she's all set to become the MIL from hell!