The Hoarders Anonymous #5

[CherryMargo]

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Is your house/flat in a complete mess? Do you often feel overwhelmed and helpless when it comes to sorting it out? Do you procrastinate a lot? Do you struggle to declutter due to emotional attachment or decision-making fatigue? Are you embarrassed to invite people in?

Then you and us have a lot in common!

Join in for advice, encouragement and support. Here we share our struggles no matter how big, and celebrate our progress no matter how small. Welcome to thread number five! 🤗

P. S. Here are the links to various methods mentioned in previous threads:

The FlyLady Cleaning Method by Marla Cilley
The Organised Mum Method by Gemma Bray
The KonMari Method by Marie Kondo
The Getting Things Done Method by David Allen

Elle, I worry a lot when tradesmen don't seem to understand what they are doing. It has happened to me a few times, the Heath Robinson mode of repair. The worst was the plumber who argued with me about my water tank (which I don't have) insisting there was one somewhere; it is a combi boiler from mains. Then there were the cowboy dampproofers. The standin plumber who borrowed my dodgy spirit level to install radiators, and installed them wonky. The shelves that fall down when you put books on them, it is physics fgs!
The more you know the worse it is to watch.

Today I'm taking a break from gardening and going back to the curtain hanging, drill etc. It has taken me a while to get all the constituent parts for this week long "activity".in one place..pins, drill, needle thread, new curtain pole, curtain "pieces", stepladder right height. I will get there in the end, hopefully I won't fall off ladder. oh yes, pencil, spirit level, rawlplugs, drill bit of right size.

DownUdderer yep, high probability that this top of the fridge stuff will sit in the box for goodness knows how long. It’s definitely a procrastination strategy to avoid making decisions but I can’t seem to break the habit.

Super news about your health results. I’ve a few things under investigation at the minute and it’s very hard not to ponder the worst case scenarios, fantastic that this stress has been lifted.

haven't caught up yet: will do at next break.

I am setting myself a challenge:
6rooms,
5 things picked up off the floor in each one, (and dealt with)
4 things thrown out, no matter how small, (including recycling and charity bag)
3 things cleaned (again no matter how small)
2 loads of washing put away
1 lot of washing up done.

goodness knows if I will do it all exactly but it usually gets me working and doing something, which is what I need, and gives some easy wins early on so feel I can continue.

Easy wins really can get the ball rolling.

(there are often things on the floor that need dealing with as I sometimes get dizzy when bending down, so wait for a better day. falling over and headbutting something hard is not going to help get cleaned up)

bathroom:
floor: picked up and recycled four loo rolls (ffs, must do this more often)
thrown out: empty loo roll packet, 2 empty loo rolls from side
cleaned:

kitchen:
floor: 1 packet to recycling, one invoice ripped up and put in the compost bag
thrown out: four empty packets on the worksurface, recycling (5) two packs of weetbiscs and a pack of sweeties put in bag for ex
put away:rice
cleaned:sink area, 32 floor "tiles" hoovered and washed(pattern on the lino) recleaned sink and poured hot water and washing up liquid down the drain as it was running slowly and the washing up water was very greasy.
washing up: finished putting last things on rack away, started 12.37, 1.00 pot rack full (still more to do) Finished washing up, not finished putting away or wiping surfaces.

living room:
picked up:
thrown out:two things to recycling, two things to bin.
cleaned:
put away: pop and squash to kitchen cupboard
washing:

ds's room:
picked up:
thrown out:
cleaned:
put away:

dd's room:
picked up
thrown out
cleaned
put away

nettles: I think my posts above proove the point that I am doing little bits here and there sometimes, depemding on the mood I am in and the amount I feel I can get done.

Thanks elle and solo, I did stuff all yesterday, reading sleeping, eating. today I am clearing up the debris and attempting to catch up on some housework. must not waste the epeace and quiet though as I need to rest too. trying to get a happy balance.

Down that's great news re the results .
Hope I didn't sound 'wrong' when I mentioned the walking foot. I didn't even know about these until about 2 years ago, and I've been sewing for 50 years, so of course, I didn't know if you knew or not. Bit naff that it's still a difficult task though :(

Susan I love this:
6rooms,
5 things picked up off the floor in each one, (and dealt with)
4 things thrown out, no matter how small, (including recycling and charity bag)
3 things cleaned (again no matter how small)
2 loads of washing put away
1 lot of washing up done.
I might try a bit of this myself!

Nettle I used to do all my own DIY, but since having ME (when I finally admitted defeat, and that I couldn't do it anymore), I only tackle very small jobs, but I do question myself nowadays. I think it's a loss of confidence. I've been pulling bits of wallpaper off the master bedroom for about 7 years, but there's still a lot to do.

Today, nothing done as I wasn't at home. It's been a largely wasted weekend.

bathroom:
floor: picked up and recycled four loo rolls (ffs, must do this more often) taken white washing downstairs and put in machine
thrown out: empty loo roll packet, 2 empty loo rolls from side, three empty bottles
cleaned:

kitchen:
floor: 1 packet to recycling, one invoice ripped up and put in the compost bag
thrown out: four empty packets on the worksurface, recycling (5) two packs of weetbiscs and a pack of sweeties put in bag for ex. sent out the bin.
put away: rice
cleaned: sink area, 32 floor "tiles" hoovered and washed(pattern on the lino) recleaned sink and poured hot water and washing up liquid down the drain as it was running slowly and the washing up water was very greasy. worksurface next to sink
washing up finished washing up and wiping next to sink. pots away. (i think there are two or three left)

living room:
picked up: five things
thrown out:two things to recycling, two things to bin.
cleaned:
put away: pop and squash to kitchen cupboard
washing: 1 basket full of laundry taken upstairs, sorted and put away/back on ds's bed.

ds's room:
picked up: three items of clothing to wash
thrown out: two packets
cleaned:
put away: 1 load of laundry form the living room.

dd's room:

thrown out: five items of clothing and a too small coat hanger. (ok, they are in the kitchen waiting to be put in a bag.
cleaned
put away/picked up: lots of laundry that has fallen on the floor. a box and a bottle. a cup and a bottle lid taken down to wash up.

Hall/stairs/landing
picked up: four items if recycling that dd was supposed to do last Friday
thrown out:
cleaned:
put away: 1 bottle of laundry liquid

additions: washed splint. (oh I have not missed that all weekend)
piled up weekend bags in the hall to deal with tomorrow.

shattered.

this post has been open since I last posted so I will read intervening posted once I have posted this.

I didn't quite finish it, solo but got enough done to keep it from getting worse at least. I find it useful when it is all too much to contemplate.

I did get the big jobs done: putting two baskets full of laundry away and washing up. plus sent the bin down with ex and got some spare food out the house to ex's house.

Susan you've done well. I do similar if everything has got into a state. I go round each room and ask myself what one thing would make a big difference to this room, then do that.

Down glad your results are ok. I didn't realize you weren't well. Must have been a stressful wait.

Elleherd contractors sounds a disaster. Fingers crossed for a suitable solution. I admire your determination to get it sorted. I've no mental energy for dealing with this sort of thing at all, I prefer renting, it might be awful at times but it's never really my problem.

Full clean done yesterday. Nothing practical done today, I was dealing with emotional stuff instead.

Well unfortunately the sun came out so I didn't manage the curtain pole,
However I did do a quick tidy of kitchen and swept floor, took rubbish out
Walk
And back to the weeding and digging
Further tackling of curtains. It is very enjoyable lining up the visual pattern on the fabric when hemming etc, maybe I get more pleasure from maths than I thought! Loads more to do though without a sewing machine (I'm not at home btw)

Solo, I greatly appreciate you mentioning the walking foot. I appreciate everyone here, so many little comments from others here have helped me along. I have a walking foot because I love to sew quilts and of course it can help with that (when you have one layer of fabric, some batting and then another layer of fabric on the other side). I have not sewn anything much at all for two years though, so I do need to dredge my memory on how everything works.

So often I find myself sympathizing with everyone here and agreeing, and seeing things from a new perspective greatly helps me.

DH took mountains of recycling out this evening, yippee. And a few extra bags of trash found their way out this evening too.

I went out and had a hike today, so nice to get out and unwind.

Solo A lot of the Check a trader and similar organisations (including de-hoarding ones) are just a case of paying for membership, and it’s really hard to get the cowboys named on them.
DownUdderer Really glad the results were desirable! It is horrible waiting. Yes to the unfinished jobs, though I usually, (but not always!) eventually get round to either finishing them or redoing.
Nettleskeins Awful isn’t it. This one’s beyond seeming to not know. It’s unusable and will have to come out and be redone. The materials are incorrect and have been too badly damaged to reuse and it’s a question of who will have to both do and pay for it.
Miaowse Although it’s churning, I’ve found that at least keeping things moving keeps stuff clean and can stop amounts building up.
Susan Well done! Yes to managing something, anything as a motivator.
Amber Having little choice than to live in sub-standard conditions makes it my problem, even though it should be the landlords.

Not a great day. Hardly slept last night after a huge branch came down next door in the storm, most of it is in their garden on top of the dead tree trunk but I’ve got a load more branches and leaves in mine after they tried and failed to roll in into mine! Cf’s but it was actually quite entertaining watching them battling with it and getting nowhere.
Today’s been spent on the phone to contractors, and cleaning, and clearing up the awful mess as best I can and trying to find out exactly what else they may have done. As well as a botched job I have very wet floors that they’re insisting happened during it and will dry out, but I’m deeply suspicious.
It seems to be a battle of nerves and who will blink first currently. They’re trying to say only the landlord can say if there’s a problem or not and are claiming nothing’s wrong and I don’t know what I’m talking about. Apparently, they get lots of “women who don’t understand these things” and we get ‘all worried over nothing.’ I’ve disagreed but pointed out that anyway I don’t need to know much as actually the pictures I’ve sent, speak for themselves!
Various excuses as to why they have more important things to do than look at them. So I’ve been helpful and offered to put them on the internet and invite opinions from others in the business with more time to asses them.

Unbelievable Elle . And the log rolling neighbours...
In the end it is the landlords property that is being damaged by the contractors, so I hope they do blink first when they realise who they are accountable to (that's if he cares, but presumably he won't want to pay for botched repairs)
You sound very strong and determined, and not likely to put up with any more rubbish treatment.

If it's an awful home then one day when you've finished decluttering maybe you'll be able to move. That's what I meant about it not being your problem, if the building falls down or whatever you can just move. Even if it's council you can do an exchange to a different property, or eventually get old enough to have sheltered housing, or get back on the list for needing to downsize due to having too many bedrooms when children have moved out. What a nightmare though.

Hey maybe GA would like a lodger? She could use the money to do a downstairs bathroom and you could live upstairs. There's lots of free-standing genius solutions for kitchen appliances in IKEA for people who haven't really got a kitchen. Maybe not a suitable idea but just thought I'd include my imagination for you.

Done very little towards the flat but have:
Reminded DC about something, then have chased up school when they changed it and didn't tell DC.
Tried to respond to vaccine invite, panicked as it was on the same day as another appointment, rang GP to find out info on frequency of clinics, trying to manage an impending autistic response of total exhaustion

One load of washing, still in machine,

Plants watered, tomato flowers tickled, counting baby tomatoes,

Dry washing taken to dd's room.

Boy fed breakfast,snack and tea

Bin bag put in. (On top of the strawberry bits which will need to be picked out tomorrow but was too tired to manage today)

Amber thanks for applying imagination but none of that is our situation or options.
We can’t just move, and have a no right to buy, or swap clause in the tenancy. We also have no right to be rehoused. Properties were in poor condition way back when but that’s how we got affordable housing.
Landlords now changed and they’re unbothered about the condition of the properties as they’re long term land banking and borrowing against it.
It does have it’s pros as well as cons, it’s just any time repairs are more than we can do ourselves, this sort of thing happens.

Solo tbh I used to be pretty strong but I've actually developed a fear and hatred of confrontation and find it all really stressful, but I’ve learnt how to act like I’m not too affected.

Susan hope you've managed to get the appointments sorted. Baby tomatoes sounds very hopeful.

No response from contractors and realised I’ve let myself get thrown off track and there’s thirteen days left before needing the whole place clear for the next ones to be able to access everywhere, but I can’t move lots of stuff back to where it should be until the bodge job’s been sorted and the floor has dried out. Can’t quite work out a new plan, so went for getting back on with sorting and chucking at least while I work it out.
Managed to get three sacks out, as well as two carrier bags of recycling. Also went through domestic and ex business cleaning equipment and realized I've somehow accumulated six mops (plus two spare mop heads) and four mop buckets!
Have meeting with hospital tomorrow morning which hopefully is because GA’s move is about to happen. Fingers crossed.

I've had a tradesman round to mend two locks today. I'm naturally very avoidant about getting tradesmen round to fix things (fear that they will make things worse, or not turn up) so that is a big win. One was a window lock so not necessary (window was stuck locked) but I'm so glad it opens now!!
Tomorrow someone is coming round to fix an aerial for the telly, another fiddly unnecessary but slowly drains the life out of you repair.
So it has been small steps today but good ones
And I emptied bins and wiped worktops and weeded some more flowerbeds (not my house)

I do that with mop buckets Elle, at one point I was reusing them to grow tomatoes, and I had a mop for "vomit" that I kept spare, luckily never used. Now I just have two buckets I'm sure I will regret getting rid of it when there are teenagers over
Those drafted contractors, I hope this a different set. Dehumidifier for floor??? Or those cheap crystal thingies that absorb water, very handy

I see what you mean, dehumidifier isn't going to help it is the threat of the water coming back up again

Elle the cheek of people - really I hope it is sorted out without anyone other than the CONtractors paying for the hash up.

I only washed up and did dinner for Dd and me tonight. I'm in terrible pain in my hip and lower back (inflamed nerves in my back).

I really do need to get moving in the house.

Nettle a lot of my window locks are stuck too. A lot of years ago, I managed to break a handle clean off because I tried very hard to open it. I desperately need new windows and patio doors...++++ loads of things :(
Elle it all sounds so stressful for you.