Fledglings flying into the Roaring Twenties! January 2020 Flylady thread, all welcome.

[LaneBoy]

Welcome to the first Flylady thread of the decade! This is a friendly ongoing thread where we follow (loosely. In some cases, very loosely. ) the Flylady method for sorting out our homes and lives!

Newbies are always welcome here! It’s a long running thread so please don’t worry if we appear cliquey. There’s a lot of chatter and support for all sorts of things, alongside the housework stuff.

Over recent months we have agreed that big lists of daily links aren’t necessary - on a daily basis I will post (if I remember... it is maybe 18 months since I last hosted so please forgive any screw ups ) a link to the launch pad, which is where you can access the information for that day - babysteps, missions, daily focus etc. But if you’re confused about anything, please ask!

Check out the website too - but we suggest not signing up for the millions of emails.

Information on getting started here.

The great thing about Flylady is that you jump in where you are. Everything you do is progress. Don’t worry about not “keeping up”. Any achievement, however small, means progress.

Anyway, huge thank you to Stressy for running our very busy December thread!

And... HAPPY NEW YEAR FLEDGLINGS!!!

Oh yes I think I saw that too willow :) around SATs time there are usually a load of posts with authors saying they’d never pass the tests generally.

Made DS happy this morning by starting some geometry (translations). He’s a very visual kid. It’s trying to draw the result neatly using a ruler that’s the problem so clearly he needs work on more basic skills :o (he’s dyspraxic)

The next bit needs some more groundwork which I totally forgot about. So I need to find some work for that. I am enjoying this though. We’ve spent years repeating the basics for DD due to her maths difficulties and DS confessed to me the other day that he’s been really bored.

Willow that sounds really difficult. The right fit is really hard to find. Does he have an opinion yet as to whether he would like to try secondary?

DS (year 6) is dead against it which is fine by me. I’m needing to make sure we have more social and exercise stuff for him during the day now though as he is missing his sister and his hyperactivity is increasing all the time (my god the noises he was making last night 😭😡). But he’s much happier getting on with work and was even helping design his own worksheets with DH yesterday. :o I hate to admit it but HE with just him is a lot easier. School structure seems to work much better for DD and actually our relationship has improved having that space.

What is the home ed community like where you are? This is the crucial thing I think. DD started to outgrow the community here really, she still has a few home ed friends but she just wanted the school experience, she’s always had that fear of missing out. But where we live the HE community is massive and there’s loads going on with regular stuff and workshops etc, and lots of kids like DS. So between that and his “after school” activities (st john ambulance, scouts, tap, taekwondo) I think he will be ok. We are going to have his best friend round a couple of times a week to work through some subject books together. But it really depends on the area and the learning styles of other families (this is where DD became less happy TBH - she wanted group learning but most of her friends didn’t. At least in school it’s guaranteed!).

The whole lonely at 15 thing is something I do see a lot on FB groups but hopefully there is enough of a social scene to avoid that if he has some good friends? I think isolation is more of a risk by that age as teens get drawn into socialising via their phones instead and lots of their home ed friends return to school/college so there’s a much smaller pool of potential friends.

I spoke a little to the ed psych about school - there is just no way he’d cope in mainstream but an SN school wouldn’t take him. I get what you mean with the potential as well - LEA happy with the education we’ve provided but I’ve realised in the last year or so that he’s capable of so much more. And school isn’t necessarily the answer to that either, he’s got an insanely “wonky profile” academically. Online school wouldn’t work for him at the moment (may try some short courses at some point) but we are luckily in a position where we can dedicate a lot of time to planning etc ourselves (I say lucky, it’s really down to the fact that neither of us are physically well enough to work outside the home ). Gah. All a bit complicated isn’t it? We do supposedly have a good chance of EHCP and even potentially a personal budget for him because his needs impact his learning but I do not have that fight in me right now. We have a whole mess of other stuff to figure out first

Oh my gosh that was a lot of waffle sorry. I really should have got on with other stuff while DS took a break.

Errrrr happy Flying everyone. It’s anti-procrastination day. Yay.

Quick hello from me, zoo I hope your appointment goes well today. My finger finally seems to be healing better, thankfully.

I'm off out in half an hour so will catch up properly with the thread later on. May just make some couscous before I go to have for lunch and slap some makeup on

Catch you later!

willowtotally get that.my D's is 14 and very lonely.hes bright so was able keep it together in primary.secondary school wheels fell off completely,made worse by not having sisters to go to.the local boys school is not an option(quite a distance,no transport and he's terrified of boisterous boys) and mixed school we pick best if bad bunch in our catchment which have let him down ridiculously badly offering nothing and not alerting LEA to lack education in 12onths nor telling me that I could chose to draw LEA to step inECHP is in limbo whilst wait ill senior staff to check draft copy and meanwhile he is festering and dare I say it getting worse in some ways as he entrenches habits I am less keen on and find hard to prevent/stop
It's very hard,all we want is for them to achieve the best they can and be happy(applies all children not just SEN)hope you can get things rolling and find what you are searching for -ds hasn't full statement ASD so is primary ESMH which means most options don't fit what we are hunting for as in my county there are no combinations only ASD or ESMH

Tada
Cats fed
Wash on
Wash up last night's tea stuff
Wipe surfaces
Wipe table
Breakfasts and dd2 snacks to graze on sorted
More wash up
Wash in drier
Tackle corner my room
Cats had pulled over bag of Xmas ornaments etc.now boxed in crate so no more baubles everywhere
Located old diary so can add in birthdays, anniversaries and addresses we useto new diary
Damp dusted radiator and under it

Into boy dungeon
Pull out furniture and damp dust
Pull everything out from under midi sleeper and tidy/damp dust
Help him sort all PS games and put away strays
Tidy bookshelves together
All skirts wiped/woodwork wiped
Wipe over laminate

Just need dust actual chest drawers etc

Stopped for lunch before get too nervous to eat!!

we3 organised lifts my mood A LOT (and once one things neat mess nearby irritates me so I get on a roll sometimes )
I do find the basics of load washing and s+s deffo helped bring sense order

That's good to hear Chic.

Lane Re the ruler. Have you told him that he needs to push down on the ruler to stop it moving on the page. I discovered this once and have found it is something that boys in particular don't realise. I did a lot of work in Yr3/4 and the first thing my friend and I did was to teach them how to set out Maths in neat manner. We practised simple things like lining up numbers in the correct boxes and drawing lines. Some in Yr2 were still writing on blank books so quite a challenge to write in squares. Ruling lines needed to be taught individually to most of the boys. Girls seem to get it apart from a few. It made geometry much easier when we got to that week.

Thanks stomach seems much better. I have kept to bland foods which has helped the acid form hernia as well. GP might say it was all stress related as i had a difficult day a couple of weeks ago.I was quite stressed afterwards.Getting less anguish as it fades into the distance.
Now have a bad back because I stupidly moved a standing mirror to take drawers out to re sort. Think I have done a disc again.Osteopath is £45 plus they may charge me for an accidentally missed appointment.

Ta Da

Did an hours ironing last night
washed up
showered haven't done much so claiming that one Lane. Also because of state of tiles and still waiting for tiler we are showing less to avoid water leaking down to kitchen. Every other day is a stand up wash. Will be glad when it is fixed at end of month.
Sorted and brought down wash.
One LOL - love that!
Read up on houseplants and put into journal dividing DD's plants and mine. So I can replace the ones I killed in the winter. One seems to me regenerating so fingers crossed.

To Do
Lob all the things that are not put away into a basket and then go through and put away.
Have lunch.
Finish ironing. Where is Ned?
Ask DH to pull boxes out from under bed so the dust bunnies can be sucked up.
If he is willing help strip and remake my bed.

It is a shame the Education system lets down such a lot of children.

Whoaaaa bower thank you! I’d not even thought of that, that’s a good shout as he does tend to be quite gentle with that kind of thing. He does have slightly poor muscle tone as is common with ASD although he’s insanely energetic and active. I think that’s one reason he gets tired of writing quickly. We did have some suggestions of ways to improve that on his hands. Actually the next thing I need to teach him for the geometry thing would be drawing lines with rulers anyway (y=x, x=1 etc nothing more complex yet) so that would be a good opportunity to tell him that and he can practise. Thank you!

I should go and actually find some resources to teach said line drawings now.

Cagletini got on so much better at nursery today :)

It sure is bower :( I don’t blame teachers at all really. The system is fucked.

Agreed bower!

Before coming on this thread I'd just taken for granted the fact that I can send my dc off to school and they are educated for me. I hadn't thought about the stresses it must put on a family when mainstream schooling is not suitable for their dc.

Hats off to all of you dealing with HE you all deserve a medal 🏅

I agree. There are limited options for schools here, but thankfully a lovely primary school just a few minutes walk from us and it has never crossed my mind that she might go to it and have issues there. It must be so stressful having so much to think about it.

Willow you can have him and his extensive trainer collection

Hope you feel a bit more yourself later We3. I’m the same, let everything by slide when I’m down but getting back in top of things definitely helps. When do you expect to hear back?

Ta Da:
✅ Got me and DD sorted and to health centre for 9am for my pill appointment. Turns out the one I’m on doesn’t require a yearly check and I could have done it over the phone
✅ bedding in WM and then dryer
✅ upstairs dusted and hoovered
✅ bathroom cleaned
✅ bathroom floor mopped
✅ bedroom and dressing room windows and mirrors cleaned
✅ shower screen gleaming
✅ shower screen cleaned again to not quite as gleaming following DD smearing hand soap all over it (she was ‘helping’)
✅ lunch eaten and dishes in the dishwasher
✅ hob and benches wiped
✅ half arsed hoover downstairs

Met a friend at soft play for a couple of hours and resisted their amazing burgers, sticking to the rest of my healthy veg soup. I’m very proud!

To Do:
Bedding back on
DD’s bedding washed and dried and back on
Prep dinner
Pick up pill from chemist
Visit to elderly relative
Sit down

Hello from me too! 🍒👋

Unusually forme trying to keep myself off Mumsnet as much as poss as so much happening on work (role expanding end of month), house renovation, class rep work, university research/equivalence issues and fairs, dhorse, nationality dossier, expanding job front + have visitors this weekend (dd's godfather's 18 mth twin boys and parents - yay will be lovely to have babies in the house again!! ) and one of my god-daughters coming to stay thereafter plus family wedding shenanigans, and washing pile still hasn't diminished since Christmas!

A belated happy birthday to your dh Lane although sorry he is feeling so rough

Lane, Zoo and Willow hope you can find solutions to your school /education searches that offer maximum support to your indiv DC. Fwiw, and if it's any consolation, I think quite a few teens in full-time education go through periods when they are a bit lost/lonely too, which can be part of adolescence ifyswim. It can be hard but at least they have on-line communication which didn't exist in our day. I think someteens just need a bit more time to find their own group/niche and to build confidence in themselves. For my nephew, this didn't happen until second year of sixth form so he didn't really enjoy school and felt isolated there, then he had another v lonely bit first year of uni which improved, but as a young adult he has loads of friends now.

Bower and Lane dc here do endless boring maths drills using les carnets carrés, where lots of attention is paid to hand position and neatness, and this follows three years of maternelle where tiny DC wield enormously sharp pins which are used to prick holes in tracing paper following lines of letters and numbers. The obligatory annual list of "matérial scolaire" required for primaire is infamous among expats for its precision and peculiarities ie we had to buy about five different sizes of squared notebooks, then three different sizes of lined ones, then three mixed square and lined, all with different specific pencils and pens, all at different small shops which were being targeted by all the parents in the same five days (as list released first week of term!) as they weren't available on-line then ( this has all changed and gone on-line since then thank heavens) but I used to dread it as along with that and the annual covering of text and exercise books with sticky back plastic it used to be a nightmare frankly!

Glad finger better Chic

Oh no Tinselette I'm sorry you are still ill; you are having a really gruelling/horrible time. Hope the abs help.

Sorry, can't scroll down further but mahoosive waves to everyone else!

[https://www.worldclasslearning.com/english/figures-of-speech.html Just for you Lane if you love figurative language!]] Relish a good litote personally

GAH trying again

Thanks for the ruler tip Bower will be useful for Ds 😉.

I have been signed off work for a week and flying in the house too and doctor says it's fine to give cereal for tea. I think I love her.

Was phoned at 8.30 by gp to say come in to discuss test results so had a minor freak. Turns out there is a bacterial infection somewhere and my liver results reflect that. I'm on the second day of antibiotics so I should be seeing an improvement tomorrow.

tinselette take it easy lovely
SC good to hear from youwhen's the wedding?dd1 is June
KT half arsed hoovering better than no hoovering!!

Well I'm home.bit uncomfy,but heyho.suck it up buttercup!!
Had anticipated this so simple tea for little ones-lamb grillsteaks,carrots and broccoli and couscous flavoured with garlic,sun dry tomato and basil

Oh my word sc that link made my nerdy little heart soar! 😍 Thank you!

Thought you might like it Lane

Date still to be fixed Zoo - complicated!

Hope you feel better soon Tinselette take it steady

We3 hope your ds ok today

You too Zoo rest up tonight if you can

🤗 pleased to help. It was an observation I made. They need to be told to push down on the ruler. I sometimes talked about it being a sandwich ruler, paper desk. If you didn’t press them together the filling would fall out. Some got that. Lining the ruler up with the line on the squares doesn’t occur to some either.🤔

BF called in to say could she call in for a cuppa in about an hour. She had a client in the village then would appear. I realised I had no biccies so made an all in one mix and made lemon buns.

Ta Da

Got a non too willing DH to help change bed sheets. I did suggest kitchen floor needed washed but that fell on deaf ears.
He did bring logs in. I don’t do this now. He keeps fire going. He feds cat and chicken as he is out first.

Due to hurting back I haven’t done any more of boudoir.
Washed up lunch dishes.
LoL x2 one ready for tomorrow.
S&S
Made lamb roast and reheated left over pots and veg plus more broccoli.
Washed up baking and most of tea dishes while cooking and dishing up.
DH did the rest.
Came to bed at 9pm

Found moisturiser 🧴 when I vacuumed behind bedside cabinet. Yeah! Has been missing for months. So back to every day cleansing routine and tone and moisturise Liz Earl. I have been half hearted lately and I have got a spot on my nose😤 so pamper time is that. I don’t wear make up unless going out. I don’t even bother much for that now.

No wonder you weren’t feeling well Tinselette look after yourself a bit of pampering tomorrow. My order.😁

ta da
✅home ed with DS
✅planned some new maths including making a note to try the ruler thing (love the sandwich idea too)
✅talked down anxious friend
✅walked to pub - this is the furthest I’ve been myself in a week, I’ve only been out in cars since getting ill so I wanted to see how it went, didn’t even order anything just sat in a corner and wrote my ACEs course notes.
✅journal

List for the morning as I didn’t get anything ready today
🎯remember extra meds (going to see if they make a difference to a particular symptom)
🎯sort Cagletini
🎯shower
🎯ring doctors
🎯check blood pressure at some point
🎯get DD together some pads in a little bag to go in her school bag, think she’s due on any day and I really don’t want it to be a nightmare if it arrives at school as that’s not happened yet
🎯delegate maths to DH
🎯playgroup
🎯ring psychiatrist to rearrange appt
🎯email senco about toilet pass for DD

Must go to bed now night fledglings x

Lane maybe take opportunity to talk about who she could go to if she needs pads or extra. Due to the hype about girls /woman and affordability lots of places collected. We always have had a small collection and some spare knickers but then the local church gave us some from their collection. We now have a toy box full of different types.
Yes. The sandwich 🥪 helps some get it. Boys and their food😋

Zoo missed about appointment. Hope everything ok.
That Hope everything you are juggling is manageable.

That's a lot of Ta Das and To Dos, Lane! I'm writing my list while waiting at the GP with DS3, who has a swollen eye.

Ta Das
✓ up, dressed, shoes, hair, face, healthful breakfast, meds
✓ hound walked
✓ DH out of house on time
✓ dw rotated
✓ bedroom aired and dried
✓ all loos etc s&s
✓ concluded no need for LOL (this is wrong. Someone is hiding their pants!).
✓ recycling moved to box in garage
✓ sausages out of freezer for tea
✓ Tesco after drs appt for prescription for DS's eye drops and groceries Lidl didn't have yesterday.

To Dos

• Hoover upstairs
• Assemble and post parcel to DS1
• Teach DS3 equivalent fractions (maths is not going well)
• Review DH's "we need an EHCP" kick off letter and send
• DS3 drumming lesson at 2.20pm
• Find maths support for slow processors for DS3
• Poke the OT to at least tell us where in the process she is.

Hello all! Just finished work and have been waiting for ages for the bus. Need to decided soon whether to give up and walk - usually quicker to wait for bus but starting to wonder. Need to get back in time to pick up kids so I think if it isn’t here at 4:30 I will have to walk it. Ugh. Not actually sure I will get on this one either as it is busy.

Caught up on thread now... hello to everyone. I haven’t done much flying this week but DH has bought and built a kallax unit downstairs which I am very excited by. I have tomorrow morning free so I think instead of home bleugh I will try to organise that. If I have time I will do a quick home bleugh or it will have to wait until weekend / Monday. Certainly won’t have time before kids pick up now with this wait for the bus .

Oh, yuk, bus waiting in this weather, stressy. It's both damp and freezing here, hope you aren't both of these things!

✓ ECH assessment request letter sent today. I had to list all the things my lovely, talented, quirky boy can't do like NT children. I'm not enjoying this

willow depressing isn't it?I found myself very low after I did D's,and when applied DLA.i guess I focus more on where we are at/getting thru each day and Its only when I have to compare him to " his age capability" I really have to pay attention to the deficits

Stressy hope there was room on the bus!

Not a good day for me.very tired and low.think all three zoolets floundering with anxiety etc this week is taking its toll

Ta didn't
Lay on sofa,semi dozing and did naff all