#4 - Hoarding, Sorting, Organising, Friendship, Understanding. All On One Thread.

[Solo]

Are you a hoarder? Are you in a mess, untidy, disorganised? A bit lazy with housework? Are you are ill and not coping with the housework? Are you totally overwhelmed? Are you are emotionally attached to items for whatever reason and can't let them go? Are you unable to just ask someone in for a cuppa at a moments notice or do dread the meter reader asking for access?
Do you find yourself nodding whilst reading any of this? If you have a combination of any or all of these things or something completely different, please come and join us. There is no judging. We have something in common here and we have a common goal. We share our ideas and we share our disappointments no matter how big and our celebrations no matter how small. We cheer one another along and drag the drowners from the depths of despair.

Join us; we don't bite! Welcome to thread number 4.

Hello, Hello!! How are you all? :) Welcome to new members. Drama and Mango (sorry about shortening your nn's, but I do that to everyone.

So, I've only read a few posts, so in short, I'm sorry about the kitchen accident; I'm glad Dd is improving. That's so scary.
Red coat sounds fab, I'm glad you kept it. Sometimes we need something like that to think and feel differently (better?) about ourselves. I would though, have been exactly the same thinking about getting rid of the old coat...everything I've been through with it etc. it's the emotional attachment, which is my biggest problem.
Storage costs. Me too. £130pm at the moment. I took it out for 6 weeks 7 years ago. Such a massive waste of money. And now having just looked back and seen how long it's actually been; I need to do something about that. It's ridiculous.

This year is going to be the year I sort my house out. It HAS to be done.

I will try to get on here more often.

We can do it. Yes, we can do it.

@Solo and @Miaowse thank you, yes it was awful. I surprised myself by mentioning it, as for one thing it's throughly outing, and for another it feels a bit like a dark secret, the worst mistake I have ever made. If we're allowed to mix by summer I shall have to get used to explaining again. In long sleeves you can't tell.
The house remains an absolute tip. Home schooling the preschooler (it's a school preschool, sigh) while the toddler screams at me is eating all my time, so zero progress. I've not cleaned properly in weeks, as I just can't get the place tidy enough. Doesn't feel like much point decluttering while it's so hard to get stuff out, unless I dump everything into landfill. It's so frustrating.

Oh @GlumyGloomer, please don't be so hard on yourself - as I said above, even the first aider teaching me had experienced the same, her DD was scalded when she turned her back for a few seconds. She just didn't realise that her DD could reach the hot cup of tea DS2 has scars from his broken arm too where it was pinned - complete accident (he fell off play equipment) but still makes me feel awful.

Our house is a bit better this time round (I can't believe it's almost a year since the last lockdown ) but I think that's because my DC are that bit older and more bribeable it's easier to explain why we should tidy up/ offer them a bit more TV time once everywhere is clean etc. We've got into more of a routine where we go out for a walk late morning, have lunch and then they watch TV and have some warm milk whilst I get some cleaning done. The weather is miserable here so I think they're quite keen on chilling out at home rather than going outside more often!

Thank you for welcoming me, @ClaraTheImpossibleGirl and @Solo! 🙏 And I’m so-so touched that my confession has inspired you to join in, @DramaLamaDingDong! ❤️ I do hope that 2021 will become a year of progress and achievements for all of us! 🤞

And here’s a little insight into my process ⬇️

I’m not yet ready to use the KonMari or FlyLady methods (although I've studied them thoroughly), and, thus far, my way of copying with the hoard has been dividing my flat into sections and assigning a particular category of items to each section. For example, one of pile of boxes would be full of books and magazines, another one would have all of my films and music CDs, all of my makeup and skincare backups are in the boxes under the stairs, etc. If I come across something that is in the wrong pile, I try to put it immediately where it belongs. It doesn’t reduce the size of the hoard but at least helps me navigate through my flat, and find things relatively quickly.

Then, when I have time and motivation, I tackle stash by stash (not room by room), and this is the time when I declutter, clean and arrange my possessions in a chronological or alphabetical order or by colour, purpose or genre, etc. My current goal is to sort out my paper and printed materials stash. I will update if as I progress with this task 😉

Wishing everyone a lovely weekend! 😊

Glumy please don't feel bad. Accidents do happen to everyone some time or other. My niece pulled my hot tea over herself when she was a toddler too. And you certainly haven't 'outed' yourself to me, and probably not to any of us on this thread.

Right, I'm off to bed. I really need to do stuff tomorrow. My place is starting to resemble actual hoarder's houses. Actually, it does resemble a hoarder's house. Shameful really.
Night all.

Hi folks. How is everyone? My absence from the thread (again) can be understood as the fact that I have (again) failed to do any decluttering whatsoever.

Cupboards are getting full of random crap and I have no energy to deal with it - health isn’t too awful right now, but I’m now doing half the nursery runs, which alongside trying to get some other exercise in and home edding DS and supporting DD1 with school and my own studying just means it’s not been a priority at all.

However. We have had a kitchen cupboard removed by the housing association, so that we can get a DISHWASHER!!! I know that won’t make a direct difference to clutter, but it will be a life changer nonetheless, as with a family of five all home for every meal, there is a lot of washing up. So hopefully that will free up a bit of time and energy for other stuff.

Hi everyone,
Nearly made it to the end of January, which always feels like a bit of an achievement.
Homeschooling plus toddler teething continues to defeat me, but some very small progress has been made in the form of dd1's wardrobe. I've also managed to move some towel and bedding storage to the top floor bedroom, so even though nothing is gone the middle floor rooms feel a bit decluttered. Dh has been doing a bit more in terms of sorting the kitchen at the end of the day, which is keeping us just about afloat. Long may it continue! State of the house in general still abysmal though. It feels absolutely insurmountable.
How are you all doing?
Thanks for the support @Solo.

Hello Sing, we were posting at the same time.
Dishwashers are amazing! From my immediate experience though I'd say don't get the currys essentials one. It's temptingly cheap, but the filter is a bit rubbish, and you have to rinse everything off before putting it in. At our old house we had an indesit, and that lasted a good 5 years with no problems.

Hi all,

The only thing I’ve achieved in the last 12 days was to ‘shine my kitchen sink’ on 10 days.

@SingToTheSky congratulations on freeing up some space for a dishwasher! My kitchen is too small to allow for it, but it would be my number one priority if I move to a bigger house one day.

@SingToTheSky I bet you’ll find the dishwasher makes a massive difference to visual clutter as you can quickly put piles of dirty dishes in there rather than having them all over the house by the sink.

I try to run my DW every night even if it isn’t quite full to the brim. That means I can empty it while my coffee is brewing and in theory any dirty dishes during the day go straight in the DW.

@CherryMargo wow, a shiny sink for 10 days is amazing! I have not yet managed a shiny sink even two days in a row, but overall my kitchen is way better than it was two months ago.

The rest of the house is best not mentioned...

Thank you, @Miaowse! ❤️ This is my first time ever introducing a FlyLady’s before-bed routine into my life, but I’m taking it slowly, otherwise I will soon feel too overwhelmed. For now, I am skipping steps with regard to a living/dining room, entrance and breakfast planning. I don’t yet read/meditate before bed either.

In other news, if you reside in the UK, you may find the following information useful 😊

Thanks to a partnership between recycling innovators Terracycle and health care brands Buscopan and Dulcolax, ANY used medicine blister packets can now be recycled via special containers in selected pharmacies including some Superdrug stores. The participating stores can be found HERE.

Tetrapak have also partnered with Maybelline to install collection points for ANY brand of empty cosmetic packaging in some Boots, Tesco, Superdrug and Sainsbury's stores. The participating stores can be found HERE.

Darn, I was so busy bragging about my brilliant DW routine that I forgot to put it on tonight and it’s too late now

@Miaowse I also run the dishwasher every day! But actually with me and the DC at home all day every day, and DP taking lunch to work as well, it's often more like twice a day. Add in the baking that the DC often do as part of their schoolwork, and the other day I ran it three times

We have a tiny kitchen though, it's much easier for me to rinse everything and shove it in the DW than leave it to stack up on the sideboard and block my only workspace... I hope it will make a big difference to you too @SingToTheSky

I haven't been on here (or indeed MN) all week as homeschooling has just been too much - DP has been supremely unhelpful in all things cleaning and tidying related, by the time I finish getting the house in some sort of order it's usually after 10pm and I'm just exhausted. I'm trying my best to keep up with exercise and healthy eating too, there's not enough hours in the day!

Crikey @CherryMargo, I don't think my sink has seen any shining for many a day

Homeschooling plus toddler teething would just about finish me off @GlumyGloomer!! Hats off to you!

Thanks all, will definitely be running the dishwasher daily - currently one of the four jobs we (me DH older DCs) rotate between is washing up, so I will change it to being the one to make sure the DW is set up and switched on etc.

Still no progress here, DH sent off his covid test earlier today, really hope it comes back soon so we know. I’m so bored and tired. Wish I had the energy to actually do decluttering!

I do find days with small DC very Groundhog Day @SingToTheSky - the energy I expend just keeping them clean/ fed/ not squabbling too much and getting them out for some form of exercise... between all those there doesn't seem to be much actual time to be productive

Definitely useful to run the dishwasher at least once a day. Ours takes a good three hours for a cycle so I have to factor that in too!

We have been so overwhelmed we haven’t even looked at which one to buy, which is a bit stupid of us as the sooner we choose the sooner we benefit from it!

Totally Groundhog Day isn’t it. There’s just nothing to look forward to now. I wish we were one of those fun families who played games or went out for endless walks (when not self isolating!) but tbh even our usual movie nights don’t appeal anymore. We’ve pretty much all hidden in screens for days in a row now

@ClaraTheImpossibleGirl I agree with the “not much time to be productive” comment - I should have plenty of hours now there are no school runs/commutes/shopping trips/meeting people for coffee etc but I feel each day I get more behind with everything and the endless battles over school work are driving me insane.

I usually manage with just one cycle a day as we are a small family plus I don’t put my main pans in the DW any longer since I noticed they have actual chunks of metal missing - but today I did run it twice as I did some baking and decided to wash a bunch of storage containers. When I first got this DW I started baking more but the novelty has worn off. The default cycle on ours is really long too, but I usually choose the faster one.

@CherryMargo you inspired me and today I gave my sink a thorough clean and used some barkeepers friend which works really well to make it look less scruffy.

Yay! I’m so happy and flattered to hear that, @Miaowse! 😊

My current product combo is Sainsbury’s Thick Bleach for the plughole, Cillit Bang Power Cleaner to remove limescale (I’m not impressed by it but I’ll use it up), and Cif Perfect Finish Stainless Steel Spray to finish it off.

The FLYing Lesson says the sink should be wiped after each use, and it is recommended that there’s a fresh tea towel every day. I’ve searched my hoard flat from top to bottom, and found five tea towels in total, so if I stay on top of my laundry, I should be able to make it work with just five.

I haven’t mentioned this before, but I am on a total no-buy at the moment (except for bare essentials) trying to ‘finish’ as many of my items as possible before bringing something new in.

I’m also trying to used up all my current stuff before buying new. I have so much to use up, all my cupboards are jammed.

I don’t dry my sink but I can imagine that works really well for preventing limescale - I’ll give it a go if I remember.

My sink is awful, there is pretty much always dirty washing up in it. When I lived by myself I always put stuff I wasn't washing straight away next to the sink rather than in it, and when I washed it was in a sink full of water. My sink stayed relatively nice.
DH's habits of filling the sink with dirty stuff and then washing under the tap have now become prevalent (and stuff sits on the draining board for ages, i always used to dry things straight away.) And the sink now gets disgusting. I just don't have the time or energy to force things back to my way, but one day when the kids are less demanding I hope to do it right again.
This morning I made the decision that I must cut my books down from 6 crates to 3. I'm giving up on the idea of storing them until the kids can be trusted with them in the living room/I can afford lovely built in book cases. My aim now is to fit them under my bed, so they are accessible and I can actually start reading them once dd2 is sleeping properly. Actually executing my plan will probably take ages, but that's the intention anyway.

I feel so unmotivated! I might try keeping a note of all housework achievements for this month though as a way of encouraging me to actually sort stuff. I just feel so... heavy? Not literally (ok yes literally as well) but like I’m wearing a lead suit that is preventing me doing anything other than laze on the sofa!

@CherryMargo we may fall out, I love Cillit Bang we have very hard water and it's the only thing which shifts our limescale!

We stocked up last year @Miaowse, I too have plenty of products to use up although I can't resist Method cleaners if they're on special offer as I love the smell!

@GlumyGloomer I couldn't cope with your DH's washing up habits I find it irritating enough when DP leaves stuff on top of the dishwasher instead of in it, like he can't work out how to actually open it

That's a good idea about the achievements @SingToTheSky. I find it hard to be motivated too when I know no-one's coming round! AF time this week so I know at some point I'll have to have a sofa day which doesn't help...

Ooh I love the smell of method stuff - especially the blue bathroom spray and the pink laundry liquid. But I’m clumsy and find the bottles crack very easily if you knock them over/drop them.

I’ve never used method laundry stuff but I love the sprays, especially the rhubarb and the mandarin!

I’ve set up a housework challenge page in my bujo so hopefully that’ll help. Sorted one small bucket of toys today, I’m going to keep it short but regular rather than trying to do loads in one day and burning out

I remember you shared a bullet journal spread before and it looked amazing.