June's arrived too soon! Catch up with the Fledgling Fly thread ... .

[Scoopofchaff]

If you are strugging with C.H.A.O.S. (can't have anyone over syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (something that undermines family fun) then this is the thread where we (loosely) follow the step-by-step Flylady housekeeping system (in our own, unique, relaxed style) with lots of chat, support and wine and cake along the way.

This is where, from the first of the month (seriously, HOW is it June already?!), we follow – loosely – the rules of FlyLady [see website here ]. (Pls ignore Flylady's barftastic language, and we suggest NOT signing up to her emails as there are rather a lot of them. All the info you need will be posted here on a daily basis.)

Helpful info on getting started here.

We adopt a three-pronged approach:

-start or repeat baby steps

• repeat baby steps + do 15 mins a day decluttering in the current zone or area (yes, just 15 mins focused work a day makes a difference!)

and/or

• reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.

[And if you are really enthusiastic and have finished decluttering - you can go on to detailed deep cleaning in each zone.]

The launch pad is the place from which you can reach most other useful areas of the site: here.

NB
This is a very long-running thread so we may appear cliquey but we really aren't! All newcomers, long-termers, lurkers and intermittent returnees not only welcome to join in but positively encouraged to do so!

Another NB
Start where you are at!. There is no need to worry about being perfect – perfectionism = paralysis! There is no such thing as ‘falling behind’ with FlyLady, if you miss anything, just move on and continue as normal the next day.

Any questions, don't hesitate to ask!

Happy Flying one and all!

Catching up on thread

zoo sorry to hear your dd2 having problems, i am dreading high school for those reasons. I will end up kicking off to fuck

Have fun at Willows Goth

Happy birthday Honky take the day off the chores.

Ta da

showered
fed kids
dressed kids
school run
washed dishes and put away
wiped over kitchen surfaces
made beds
deep cleaned and mopped bathroom
deep cleaned and mopped downstairs loo
1x laundry load in the washing machine

The house (and my hands) is smelling like a swimming pool after the bathroom cleans Getting peckish now so gonna do some lunch.

Managed to make it to town but feel shit. Didn't even dress the baby she's still in her jammies (not sure that's so acceptable at 7m compared to a newborn). Too tired to take library books back and got myself psyched up to weigh myself in boots but the machine was out of order ffs. So just bought the two things I needed (iPad cable and a book for DS)

Happy birthday honky

Happy birthday honky I know lots of people with birthdays today must be a good day

Cag it's totally acceptable nobody will even notice! She's still very very much a baby! You are doing amazingly.

I don't know who else and where else to say this so I'll say it here just to get it off my chest as much as anything. Re my friends bad news - I'm feeling like a shit friend. All my other mutual friends are rallying round with various packages and food parcels. I have done nothing other than send a reply to original message. We aren't so close that I would feel particularly comfortable going to her house unannounced. I don't know, I'm as close to her as the others and they seem to be doing all of that. It has hit me hard because our dds are the same age and have grown up together. I'm just really bad at emotions and hugs. I think I give good advice practically but face to face and emotional responses - not so good. I'm not explaining it very well. Anyway I'm going to send a card tomorrow and write something heartfelt.

Ta da
Been to shops
Made ds cheese toastie for lunch
Cleaned up spilled milk and salvaged what I could after bag broke

Dds grown up together makes it sounds like they are grown up already they are only 4!! That was badly worded sorry I'm a bit all over the place today

Foxes i am sure your friend understands and tbh when you go through something bad and everyone is bringing you things and wanting hugs and to help it can sometimes feel a bit much.

Don't feel bad foxes, everyone shows their support in different ways.
A heartfelt card card letting her know that you are there for her is fine.

Ta da

Wash on
Dryer on
Washing on line x2
Dc up fed and to school
Packed lunches made
Shopping picked up.
Sorted wonky curtain pole
Dusted sideboard, tv, sky box
Fixed remote
Pulled crap from under side board
Tidied LR1
Swept LR1
Hung up dcs uniform (ironed last night)
Put away winter bits found
Condensed dry washing baskets into 1 basket
Cleaned downstairs toilet
Wiped back door (outside)
Wiped utility window sill
Recycling out
Binned some random shit dumped in utility room
Sorted paper BRC1
Dry pots away

Thanks

That's a big list Ive go you!

I have been stuck to the sofa in a big grump for too long. Snapped at dh because he is meant to be finishing early but now he isn't. Not his fault. Ds has been asleep for nearly an hour and I've achieved precisely nothing. I really need to pick myself up and stop dwelling and worrying which is helping nobody and get some shit done because it'll make me feel better too.

Pointy stick please!

meh

Ds3 had 3.5 hours sleep. Yes, i am bragging

A very happy birthday to Honkywonkwoman (I adore peonies!!) hope you are having a lovely day

Foxes try not to fret; I'm not good with hugs and emotions either and would prefer to help in a practical way and I wouldn't like people turning up unannounced at the best of times so I am not sure that turning up on the doorstep at a time of great stress is the best thing to do either. I agree with I've and Honkywonkwoman! A quiet offer of practical help (cooking for the freezer?) down the line would be much appreciated I am sure.

Foxes that line about your ds wanting to put his bicycle on the sofa made me laugh I am afraid . DD went through a phase of taking her beloved wooden sledge to bed .

Truly fab lists I've, Firehousedog and everyone

Sorry you are feeling rough Cag small steps and all of that

Hope Lil Zoo is feeling a bit better today Zoo?

Hope you have a lovely time this afternoon Goth! And hope your dd's options/confidence problems can be resolved with a bit of reassurance from your good self and from the school.

Encouraging wing flaps to everyone else!

I feel very weary in this muggy weather. Had to literally drag myself to cook three course lunch for guests (who have very kindly come to help but somehow ... ). (Gaspacho, Italian chicken pasta dish with home made pesto followed by home made lemon tart.) Ended up feeling a bit hot and ratty and stated at the end of the meal as politely as I could that "I'm afraid I am not serving again today so if you are hungry tonight please free to avail yourself of x and y restaurants 200 yards down the road". I feel horribly guilty now but virtually all I have been doing is cooking and shopping and cleaning up again for an entire week when I am meant to be looking after dh! Washing up from lunch is still stuck on side of kitchen because there is a dw backlog from supper last night! I just expected them to say one night "well lets just have cheese and crackers as we ate well at lunch" but they never do!!

Heigh ho! Worst things happen at sea ... .

Ta da:
dog walk x 1
packed lunch for dd which I forgot she didn't need (last day of lessons today so she was home at lunch time)
calandering of bed linen
washing x 4
2 loads td/2 loads hung up on terrace to dry
dog walk x 2
dining room table hot spots
cooked three course lunch which nearly killed me
served lunch and cleared table
wrapped second baby present
office admin for one hour
dog walk x 3 with dd running alongside
helped dd with Dutch revision

And dd is in a foul mood because she has left learning Dutch vocab until the very last min as usual. But when I reminded her to do it this past weekend I got a rude reply!

Where's the gin?

sc pass me a gin if you locate it! I need one too! Your guests sound hard work are they friends? I can't believe they would expect two meals a day if someone served me all that for lunch I would never expect anything else I'd just assume bread and cheese or something nibbly! And I'd tidy up after myself. Your menu sounds wonderful by the way they are lucky guests. Too lucky! Ds gave up with the bike on the sofa in the end but he did sit in his helmet for some time bless him. Thanks for kind words , it's very hard to know what to do but I have a feeling you're all right and perhaps I should listen to my gut feeling on this one. Anyway, if others are doing food parcels now it may be best for me to wait a little bit or it might be overwhelming. Once I've seen her further down the line I can maybe see what I can do to help then.

Sorry everyone I am thread hogging! Must put the dc to bed...dh is shouting at them...

Happy Birthday HonkyTonk

Sticks large bottle of in naughty corner for all those who need it

Lovely afternoon at Willow tea room, they were very busy but we had a wonderful waitress. She commented how nice it was that we said please & thank you, as not many of their customers do. I can't abide when people are rude to serving staff

I said to DH we must go back again when I'm not driving as they do a Afternoon G&T for 2.

And bonus, when we got DD from school she was in a much better mood. Starting a Wave topic in Physics today so she feels she has a better grasp on it. I think (because it's hard getting the full story from her) that the teacher had given them some worksheets of equations to look at. DD needs to see the practical side of things before she can work through the theoretical.

Not many other ta-dahs
Post Office
Collect DD
Dinner

[Pours copious glasses of for everyone and then necks the bottle]

Not thread hogging at all Foxes I think I win the award for that ... good to vent ... and glad you feel slightly less perturbed about the situation with your friend although I am sure it must be v stressful. And thank you, yes, I like food and I like cooking, but this is getting ridiculous. It is sil and entourage who is here. To be fair, it is very good of her to come (and I am happy to entertain) but it's dh that is the worst when it comes to dining etc. He reverts to "his old family ways" when with his clan which means two or three, three-course meals a day with copious tea and coffee in between. They are food obsessed! Tbh, I feel a bit upset tonight as he is being off with me (he was not happy that I told everyone I wasn't cookign tonight) and I feel rather excluded, despite working my off for them all. Just took the dog out for walk x 4 to get rid of some of the angst! [Sticks out tongue at world in childish manner.] To cap it all, cleaning lady is ill again, so I will have loads more to do tomorrow than I though. Bah!

Great that you had such a lovely afternoon Goth and that your dd is feeling cheerier! How appalling that people can't even manage a basic "please and thank you" for waiters any more .

BBL!

foxes, I’ve said before on here but we have friends whose children have grown up with ours who had terrible things happen to them. It is a shock as you see your futures intertwined and then suddenly things are different, plus a bit of survivors’ guilt going on too. I agree with the others that actually it may be best in the weeks / months ahead to offer food etc then. They may currently have a freezer full of meals from friends but these then tend to dwindle as people get caught up back in their own lives. Depending on what has happened, one practical thing to do can be to provide easy meals or activity sets / comics for the children.

On a different note, happy birthday HonkyTonk !

Cag, we moved when DD1 was 10 months and it was very difficult with a crawling baby while trying to pack etc. It sounds as if you are doing the best you can under the circumstances.

Big wing flaps to everyone else.

Ta da:-
Did what I needed to to at work
Returned an item to Amazon via post office (was missing a part which annoyingly means I need to buy a different one)
Bought more sun cream
Dishwasher and laundry under control
Kids nearly asleep

To do:-
Figure out what we are going to have for tea

Also massive ta da for this week so far... have only looked at this thread on here and one other. Have not spent mindless hours faffing on here. Still spending too much time on Facebook but going with baby steps as Flylady would advise so not tackling that right now. Going to give myself some stars

Ta da continued ....

Washer and dryer wiped down
Trainers washed
More washing washed
RC moved to garage
Utility room swept
Dc picked up from school
Dinner pots washed
Toys tidied after dc in bed
Important email sent

ta da
✅made it to badgers despite very nearly not bothering as I felt crap
✅weighed self as found machine in different shop (3lb off in 3.5 weeks, so pretty pleased with that as slow and steady)
✅bought things I needed
✅didn’t do ANY usual home ed 🤯😰 but DS read some of his new periodic table book (and took it on the bus to badgers), DD decided to write about autism, and I suggested making a timetable for a Greek god school, which they did, and then acted out in play. So a decent day for self led learning I guess. Still have the guilt though.

ta didn’t
❌laundry
❌packing, decluttering etc

FFS

Thanks toostressy

Sounds like a good home ed kinda day. Especially if they are getting self led cag

Ds needs new school shoes, ds does not want new school shoes. We are currently at war. War I tell you! And the bugger is winning ffs not even a cobbler can save what is left of his shoes believe me at this stage I have considered it even if they are too small

True hills it did make me think, I must not lose sight of the self led stuff in my excitement that they are now receptive to “book work”. A balance would be best. I did look ahead through some of the books we will be using though, and some will require other resources available so that will need more planning.

I’m really on my feet more now cagletini is crawling 😳 I have told the Caglets that moving will require lots of help from them, and that some of that help will be in the form of watching the baby so DH and I can crack on with tidying etc - rather than giving her back the second she gets a bit too much. They would still rather do that than tidy, and we will be in the same room anyway.

Sympathies on the shoe issue. I found a FB post saying you know it’s time for new shoes when you can see what colour your socks are. I actually didn’t replace those trainers for another year at least after that post. 😳 I have been better this time but only because the hole was rubbing against my toe and really hurting. I hate change.

Baby is in bed, I dashed down to clear up a few bits but will try and sleep now. DH off tomorrow but it’s sports club so looking forward to seeing friends and getting fresh air, and I need to pop over to the pharmacy for DD’s meds.

4am wake up I think because its bloody freezing! Left bathroom window open all night and its facing ds3s room.