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February Fabulosity with the fledglings, Flylady Feb 2018 thread

999 replies

CotswoldStrife · 31/01/2018 21:03

Hello all - welcome to our February thread for 2018. Everyone is welcome and it's never too late to join in. We are decluttering our homes and keeping them clean and tidy(ish) as well as having some general chat as well.

We follow the Flylady method, and will post links daily to the missions via the Flylady website. For more information, have a look at www.flylady.net/

Here's to a fun February for all of us (with the occasional prod from the pointy stick of motivation and visits to the naughty corner Cake Brew Wine ) Grin

OP posts:
Cagliostro · 05/02/2018 17:53

Thank you💐
Managed a very brief version of home bleugh (tiny bit of dusting, wiped mirrors and a couple of window frames or the bits I could get to behind the clutter anyway and put rubbish out, DH changed bedding earlier) and still got to taekwondo on time despite an Incident whereby Cagletini slipped from DD's hands from sofa height onto the floor! She reacted quickly thank goodness so no head bump, DD more upset than baby but quite scary :(

Finding it so hard to be positive and remember that I'm getting stuff done and I'm starting to dwell on what I'm not managing instead :(

Thankfully we have loads of sausage stew left so I'm going to turn it into a pasta bake, and thus no need to buy stuff for dinner. Need to order Tesco later ugh

Cagliostro · 05/02/2018 17:55

Meant to say sorry zoo no useful experience here yet

Stilllivinginazoo · 05/02/2018 18:37

Sausage bake

HillsBesideTheSea · 05/02/2018 19:41

Zoo a while back I was link to some material that was about refusing to deal with authority Passive something something. I am thinking PDA but I believe they might be a society for dogs so not that Confused Basically similar with ds. The only thing that I have done is make his life miserable when he has lied about having homework and not done it. He gets grounded no technology no friends and extra chores. Tbh it is hard because unless they see the point they just won't. Is it something that you can ask school to deal with compulsory lunchtime detention to get caught up/homework clubs etc. etc. Ds only got better when I spoke to school and they gave him 2 options: homework at home or compulsory detention time after school so the teachers would supervise. I would actually have a word with school and see what they suggest. Depending on the age they might have different strategies or just go yep normal for bright boys with a tendency to lazy don't drive yourself mad over it. It is a tough one.

Ds is delighted with the products of this weekends activities, is apparently cooking after I have taken him to get the bits tomo. Which is a relieve teenage boys can be tricky creatures to please.

I am having nice tea, whilst sat in bed. Ds is having nice tea whilst sat in his bed and the house is very quiet right now. Shock

HillsBesideTheSea · 05/02/2018 19:44

FYI it is the lying I am punishing, school hands out the punishments for not completing of homework. he can not do his homework as far as I care as long as he keeps his effort grade up (which he can't do if he doesn't do his homework Wink ) Grin I only ground for effort grades being too low.

Stilllivinginazoo · 05/02/2018 20:08

Thanks hills
It's dd2 (13)that's my resident social skills "problem"
DS(12) is the lier and manipulator
Lil zoo(10) is very self critical
yes we are all as barmy as boxes of frogs
I hate the lies over and above anything else.the girls will bend over backwards and instantly drop anyone in it rather than lie to me under grilling....
Envy your quiet house,tho tbh we are still slightly in the quiet,wtf are they doing stage...

Steamcloud · 05/02/2018 21:43

[Gathers in hot arse bottles to self.]

Thank you for all the kind words everyone - this thread is so cheering, as ever - and I'm definitely feeling a wee bit better tonight! Jury's out on whether dd will be going to school tomorrow though.

Goth --
PA Toffee Knitting/Swan Nettles Lauren Engels Feetheart Castle BlueEyeshadow Fuzzpig Nettie Pushmepullyou and Ellie and many others have moved on and are much missed. (Sorry if I have missed anyone out there who happens to be lurking, I know I have forgotten some key names - one in particular who lives in Germany - but some key ex fledglings are escaping me tonight!) Whoknows is still here though! And Greymalkin and Mercury pop in too! And I am sure you recognise Hills Grin! Ooh yes and Honu is till lurking and pops in from time to time! And of course it really is lovely to have so many newcomers all the time who bring new ideas/new squishy babies/and new motivation!

Foxes finding of party bag gifts = good karma!

Sinusitis sounds really horrible Hills - especially in this cold weather - take it steady!

Cag for reassurance - dd rolled off our double bed and smashed her head in to the corner of a metal bedside table aged six months - and was no worse for wear (after quick check up at a&e)! They do bounce at that age! So please don't worry! And very well done on your mini home bleugh (you'll be surprised what a difference just 5 mins or so makes) and taekwondo trip! Star

Zoo I think you are spot on about dh sadly. He is always well-intentioned ifyswim so I think I just have to come to terms with the fact that he genuinely can't see the mess. YY, convenient excuse, I know, but I really think he must be blind to it ... it doesn't make any sense otherwise!

Back with thoughts on lying/teen hwk issues in a mo!

Waves to Toostressy Cotswold Honu Afresh Whispers Bowerbird Longtime and everyone else!

Afreshcuppateaplease · 05/02/2018 21:51

Evening all

Just going to have a read through properly however on quick skim i saw mention of my dps floordrobe aka washing mountain next to washing basket .....

.....its fucking back Shock

Steamcloud · 05/02/2018 22:03

Zoo re: lying and hwk etc.

Bear lying is a sign of intelligence Smile!

Bear 12 yrs is the classic age for this sort of stuff - avoidance of hwk - then lying to cover up. This too shall pass. Pay a lot of attention to one or two things that he excels in or that interest him. Avoid negative spiral. Keep telling him you have faith!

Bear Dd went through a phase of lying and the best way of dealing with it (I found anyway after trying lots of different strategies) was to use humour ie not getting too heavy about it (which I found resulted in more covering up of things) but joking in such a way (ie gesturing of large pinocchio nose/exaggerating claims even further "oh don't tell me a large bat swooped down, stole your hwk, and flew out of the window") leaving culprit in no uncertain terms that you KNOW that they are lying. Other strategy with more serious things is to let them know you are disappointed because they are better than that etc etc and discussion (which I am sure you have already had) about lying to others is bad but lying to yourself is even worse!

Bear taking away of phones/screens/games is good and getting him to "earn" phone time could be a good strategy ie 20 mins good quality homework = 10 mins of phone time!

Bear make hwk a more collective activity with set times to set good habits? So snack and relax once home from school then 30 mins later all sit at table with telly off and do 20 or 30 mins - then break - then another 20 or 30 mins. You sit at the table too with your admin at the same time.

Bear agree with Hills about rewarding effort not marks! Also agree if they don't see point they won't do it! Your ds is maybe a bit young yet, but in a couple of years, try and explore a few career ideas and see where he is at in terms of interests/what he wants to do job-wise. That can focus the mind

Bear you may have heard me mention about a pedagogical talk I went to here in very high falutin' French (so missed lots of it!) but gist was that teens have huge brain plasticity and key years for absorbing and assimilating new facts etc is 14/15 yrs. It is around this age (in their view) that dc start to get the bit between their teeth and realise that it's up to them and no one else etc etc... so hang in there Grin

You have my sympathy though because, as you know, I nagged for England/Belgium when dd was a pre-teen about hwk, showering, putting stuff away, hanging stuff up, endless stuff ... . It is not perfect now but hugely improved so there is light at the end of the tunnel! Flowers

Steamcloud · 05/02/2018 22:08

Oh no Afresh!! [grrrrrrr]

I think we need to think up some form of torture-based reprogramming regime ... .

Didn't like to mention it as I have whinged so much already today Grin but dh kindly heated up dinner tonight (while I thrashed about in laundry room). It wasn't anything complicated (chilli sauce from yesterday with baked spuds) and bugger me, he's gone and messed up the kitchen AGAIN!! Salt and olive oil all over stove top, chilli sauce dribbled on bin lid, gunk in plug hole. I despair .... .

Steamcloud · 05/02/2018 22:36

Meant to say earlier - sorry you are still feeling rough Cordelia - that really is a horrible long-running virus. There is a lot of it about atm.

And Gin and apologies to Cotswold for adding so much typing to thread today Blush

Afreshcuppateaplease · 05/02/2018 22:48

Ta das (that i can remember)

4 loads washed and dry
3 loads away
Hoovered ds3 bedroom, our bedroom and landings
Helped dd tidy her room
Decluttered on top of fridge
All pots except 2 pans washed
Table and highchair cleaned multiple times
Kitchen swept
Recycling out
Bins empty
Went to shops
School run x2
Tidy living room 1 toys
Wipe worktops
Sweep and mop utility room
Chucked out a brc
Dc all fed etc
Listened to 3 dc read
Adjusted temp on radiators in attempt save £
Made bed
Quick tidy my side bedroom
Put away bath toys
Wipe inside bathroom window
Clear pile crap off landing

Afreshcuppateaplease · 05/02/2018 22:49

Ta da cont ....

Build small flat pack unit
Clean coffee machine

Afreshcuppateaplease · 05/02/2018 22:58

So many poorly posters! I am really glad i got over the bug and didnt have it as long as others. It is horrid.

cag sorry to hear about dd and cagletini, pretty much all babies have a similar incident usually with a parent hopefully she can be reassured

I am dreading secondary school homework. It is painful enough now. I keep telling dc1&2 how much the workload will increase

sc i think we must have got our partners from the same shop ....

GoingGoingGoth · 05/02/2018 23:27

Cag just to add to the list
DD fell off the sofa (when DH was supposed to be keeping an eye on her)
Slid off the bed (I think it was the weight of her nappy)
Fell down the stairs about a week after we removed the stairgate.
Honestly I'm amazed at how she bounces. Doesn't stop the guilt at the time.

And Zoo I second SC comments. DD had a lying phase, it's awful as up to then I would have taken her word over anyone.Touch wood we're back to honesty.

Final ta dah for the day
To do
Post office
Collect DD from school
Luckily a friend's mum took her to karate
Ironing
Picked DD up
Dinner
Washing up
Scrub cooker top

DD is hormonal, so found her in floods of tears tonight after karate. She doesn't want to talk about it whatever is bothering her at the moment so I'm giving her space.
Got her to come through for dinner and then we watched Big Cats and had a cuddle. First one for ages which if it wasn't for the circumstances would be wonderful. Will try for some more one to one time with her maybe been giving her more independence than she needed.

CotswoldStrife · 05/02/2018 23:46

Hey there's no word limit here SC, the more the merrier!

Flowers to all those who need it tonight due to illness, lack of sleep, fibbing children or slightly-less-helpful-than-they-could-be partners. I'm going to post the links and chat tomorrow morning in an effort to get to bed at an earlier hour! Bugle call tomorrow morning (but quietly and with coffee and a well-stocked naughty corner).

OP posts:
CotswoldStrife · 05/02/2018 23:49

The daily summary for Tuesday (also available on the Flylady website at flight plan which should update automatically each day.

**

Baby-step no 6 - put out your hot spot (a hot spot is any place where clutter always builds up)

We are in Zone 2 this week: the kitchen

Spend 15 mins decluttering in Zone 2.

When you have finished decluttering, the detailed cleaning list (if you are at that stage) for Zone 2 is here

Mission for Tuesday clean out the cutlery tray in the drawer (how do those things collect so many crumbs)

The daily focus for Tuesday is: planning

The monthly habit for February decluttering for 15 minutes a day

daily reminders

OP posts:
Steamcloud · 06/02/2018 00:01

Aw your poor dad Goth hope she's ok; it's such a difficult balance between too little/too much responsibility etc.

Truly awesome list Afresh Star Star. Secondary school hwk much easier btw; by second year they should be pretty much autonomous or they spurn all suggestions from adults anyway.

Ta da cont'd/...
triaged laundry for 40 mins and there is still more to do Shock and banned DH from every entering laundry again! (He tries to help but mixes up all my piles!)
cleaned up supper after dh again
put rubbish out
fed animals
personal grooming: pedicure, manicure, eyebrows
scrubbed collars and cuffs and armpits of 8 white school shirts, and bunged in wash with other whites
washed sports kit
washed two loads bed linen
TD two loads bedlinen
carried two boxes upstairs
distributed bog roll around house
on-line grocery order
tidied boudoir bed!

Steamcloud · 06/02/2018 00:03

Ta for links Cotswold!

Cagliostro · 06/02/2018 00:13

Signing in with a quick list before sleep
✅maths and spellings (struggling to do more than that ATM)
✅taekwondo
✅errands in the village - luckily checked in pharmacy as Boots messed up DD’s repeat script
✅delegated hoovering and bedding change
✅clothes put away, not by me either mwahaha
✅yummy dinner
✅tried the shopping scan thing I’m doing for money
✅got to bed well before midnight (baby didn’t let me sleep but still)
✅ordered Tesco
✅DIDN'T GIVE UP ⭐️

Bowerbird5 · 06/02/2018 03:11

Ta dahs

Oh my goodness haven't you all been busy.

Haven't been to A&E though had two asthma attacks from car to school as -2 at 10am😳 didn't do duty outside.
Did interventions.
Saw kitchen planner on way home, quite good.
Cleaned out baking cupboard while waiting for tatties to boil. Made corned beef hash. Thanks Cags enjoyed and left overs for tomorrow.

Wiped all work tops, mixer( cake was delicious) and hob.
Sorted work for tomorrow's DT.
Went to quiz.came second about three/ four points behind. Winners only lost one point.
Crawled into bed, just woken for wee.

I' m going on monitor SC. Just have to decide which hospital so going to TRY to see GP today to discuss.
💓 stickers for effort for you all.

Stilllivinginazoo · 06/02/2018 05:58

boweras weather ment to be super cold/snow in lots areas next few days scarf over nose and mouth and take it steady please!

SC thoughtless men aren't from shops it's a genetic problem and whilst we can land on the moon and have Alexa turn on lights(what's wrong getting up and doing that.deffo make inventor)sadly no cure for thoughtlessitis.i suspect this is because any female inventors/geneticists etc are too busy doing their own day to day shit and OH they haven't the time to address the problems sexist rant over
Appreciate the adviceFlowers

Goth hormonal girls are hard work.how olds your DD?
Cag excellent ta da and well done for not giving up.another one who has experience babies rolling of beds and Butterfinger moments whilst wriggling.heartstipping tho they are,none my lot suffered any consequences
AfreshAngry on your behalf after excellent ta da he can't even use a laundry basket.grrrr

I am up
Lil zoo medicated
Fed cat/kits
Washing on
Bleach lav
I need consult menu plan and sort shop list plus decide what cake to make later

Bowerbird5 · 06/02/2018 06:44

Thank you yes did that yesterday. I have knitted myself a snood especially for that reason😊😷🙊Yeah we are forecast a snow day today. I hope it waits till tomorrow. Gets up to look just remembered BFs DH said 3am he was starting work at 4:30 am!❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️
Guess what! Road and my car is covered.
I don't really want a snow day today as I have my lovely class to teach and we have D&T To do all afternoon to get it finished before half term. I don't like the topic so thought I would knock it on the head. Next one is clay which I am good at. We even rushed an order through an it arrived yesterday. Wonders how many staff can get in. At least I won't battle through to find they shut the school half an hour before. That is what usually happens. I don't think this Head will be so keen to close. She lives in higher, snowy village but she has a four wheel drive!
I could see the mountains covered on Sunday. It looks so beautiful. Thinking I might have a few days away next week. Get someone to make my meals and curl up with my knitting or a good book in front of a roaring fire.a glass of something,for medicinal purposes of course. Mmm.

Zoo ta dahs already😱

Steamcloud · 06/02/2018 06:48

Morning all. Ergh. I barely slept (brain kept writing lists!). DD however is off to school bless her.

Ta da:
animals
empty DW
prep hot flask food for DD lunch
two loads laundry on

To do:
think about and prep supper/soup?
dye Barnet Fair
declutter hall (big job)
finish laundry triage
prep sofa covers for wash
eight loads laundry (at least)
boudoir bed
GSM fixed
take earrings in to be fixed
kitchen missions
sort piles of books/papers sitting room

Have a productive day everyone!

Afreshcuppateaplease · 06/02/2018 06:48

I am waiting for snow but my phone says itll be mid morning. Boring.

Ds3 up at 545 so better than yesterday! Woop!