Fledglings flutter round the May Pole – FlyLady May 2015

[Greymalkin]

First of all, a big thank you to Dogsbum for leading us (for the very first time) through the April thread; fantastic job!

If you are struggling with C.H.A.O.S. (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (Something That Undermines Family Fun) then this is the thread where we (loosely) follow the step-by-step Flylady housekeeping system (in our own, unique, relaxed style) with lots of chat, support and chat along the way.

The FlyLady link is here Don't be put off by the barf-tastic language of the site - the underlying system is sound!

This little-and-often system is designed so that you can follow a series of steps and routines each day (which gradually become second nature) in zones of the house which are designated weekly; defining and minimising housework - which in theory should leave you with loads more time to do something more interesting instead!

At the same time it is intended to reduce that panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. No problem if you miss a day or two; just jump right back in and it will all come around next month again!

It's up to you, but we advise not signing up to receive the Flylady e-mails as you will be inundated! All the information you need will be linked here on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, we will be following Flylady's steps and routines using a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

• start or repeat baby steps
• repeat baby steps + do 15 minutes a day decluttering in the current zone
• reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.
• And if you are really enthusiastic and have finished decluttering - you can go on to detailed deep cleaning in each zone.

There are three key points to keep in mind throughout:

• No perfectionism allowed - this is harder than you would imagine and many of us on this thread struggle with this one!
• You are never behind - just start where you are and anything you do is progress.
• It didn't get into a mess overnight, it won't get tidy over night - accept it will take time to get on top of things and you will be happier.

If you are new; then trying to spend 15mins decluttering daily and doing the babysteps is a good way to start. Some of us (mentioning no names!) can have scary looking ‘ta-da’ lists but don't let that worry you! Do what you can, anything is better than nothing, and don't judge yourself against others.

If all else fails, a + the power of three technique + a bit of support on here can work wonders!

Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings.

Don’t let it put you off if we appear a bit cliquey, we really aren’t! Some of us have been on here for years – but all lurkers, intermittent returnees, oldies and newcomers very, very welcome

Am feeling very disorganised atm. After insulin pen debacle yesterday, I forgot to give DD1 some fruit after lunch (which she had insulin for) and didn't realise until tea time... thankfully no major harm done, her blood sugar was just a little lower than it would be been otherwise.

Then got to school this morning (I teach DS's class on Thursday mornings) to discover that I'd forgotten to give him his school photo folder so that he can swap his passport-sized photos with the other children (this was already the second round, for those who'd forgotten the folder last week ). At least I found out about it as I was in school, so went back home to fetch it afterwards so that he'd have it in time to swap in the break. It was a lesson to me that I really need to write everything in the calendar straight away - I'd told him last week I'd put a reminder about today in the calendar, but never got round to it...

I wasn't planning on volunteering for June as a) we'll be away for a long weekend at the end of next week, and b) there's the slight possibility that DD1 may have to go into hospital for another 1-2 weeks in June to have her pump fitted. I'll know more after our appointment with her consultant tomorrow; it may not happen until July or he may well recommend that we wait until after the summer. But I'm sure that even if she does have it done in June, I'd be able to post the links at least - so if no one else is able to lead next month, I'd be happy to do so (would just need someone else to step in for a day or two at the end of next week)

Kicked one child off the computer

Ta Da

Washing up done and sink shined
Washing machine on
Both dc's bathed - ds has taken a dislike to baths atm!?

To do
What's for tea
Dust everywhere Had better start in the living room and work upwards.
Hopefully meet up with friend and drag dc's to the park.

Seem to be unreasonably enraged and stressed today. Have too much going on in my head and too much uncertainty. MIL called round, which also gave me The Rage, though I tried to hide it. I suspect it may also be my time of the month.

ta da

Fed next door's cat
DH fed our cats
Blitzed the house before MIL's visit
Persuaded DS1 to have a bath and hair wash
Attempted home ed with irritatingly unwilling DS2 (I actually banged on the table to get him to pay attention to me )
Made tea for MIL and we sat in garden on new decking (she didn't want the tea - grrr)
Checked emails for reply from job application (they have confirmed receipt of CV - argh!)
Couldn't wash bedding in new laundry capsules because they are too smelly (grrr), so used eco balls
Hung bedclothes out
Planned route to DM's partner's memorial service tomorrow
Spoke to DM on phone to confirm meeting place and time
Shouted at Asked cats not to follow me around all the f*ing time

Am now cooking veggie pasta sauce for DS2 so that he at least gets some vitamins/minerals.

to do

Lunch
Finish forms for Ds1's new school
Passport photos for DS1
Chase up endocrinologist appt for DS1
Sort out outfit to wear tomorrow

Should do tax form and DLA form, but not sure I'm in the right frame of mind for either.

Really can't volunteer for thread next month, I'm so sorry. Think I might explode if I have anything else to worry about. Life is too up in the air at the moment, as I'm not sure what's happening with possible interview/work/boys' schooling, etc. Am very apprehensive about DS1 starting his new school and how he'll cope too.

I can do next month's thread. Those that have a lot going on can help when things settle down a bit, don't worry.

ta da
empty car
change headlight bulb
construct scrap book pages for trip just had for ds (more than half done)
Car to garage

About to start to tackle mount washmore. I don't want to but needs must. Whole heap of other stuff that needs doing, but meh.

Thank you, DEM.

Am taking the boys out for a walk and hoping it will calm me down too.

Thank you DEM, I too feel as though my head might explode if I take on any more commitments in the run-up to the statement tribunal which is in July, although I don't have too much to do for it ATM it is making me feel very restless and stressy. Thank goodness I finished my OU course last week. Also thanks to Grey for this month, you've done a great job.

Last day of holidays today, it's been lovely but quite tiring, as self-catering holidays with children tend to be. Home tomorrow, we didn't leave the place as tidy as I would have liked but at least we have the weekend to sort things.

Am not surprised the forthcoming tribunal is making you feel stressy, Who. We still may have to go through that it we want DS1 to do an extra year at his new school, but am pushing that to the back of my mind for now.

Had an astonishingly successful walk with both boys. Am still amazed at the things DS1 is starting to do that he wouldn't have done even a month ago. He came out for a walk with us and ended up playing 'It' and rough and tumbling with DS2. Nothing went wrong, no explosions, no anxieties, not even the usual "I need to go home now". Amazing. He even let me take photos of him and litte brother together .

Feel calmer now. The excusion helped, plus there is no email from my job application so I now know I won't hear (if I hear at all) till next week, so can relax for now.

Focusing on tomorrow's event now. Am bringing DM home with me, so she can stay the weekend and go house hunting.

Feeling a bit better today, but the boys are still very up and down. We were supposed to be going out for the day tomorrow with FIL and step MIL but between one thing and another, they might be coming here... panic stations with boxes everywhere! Making progress on the decluttering, and getting bits of decorating done, but it's looking a dreadful mess in the meantime.

Good to hear how well DS1 is doing, Toffee, and glad the excursion helped. Hope tomorrow goes as well as possible.

Waves to everyone!

I'm not surprised it all been overwhelming Toffee your mum the relief over ds1 the ever present ds2 - lovely as he is. Cats and MIL are always the last straws. Our cats send me insane too when they follow me around miaowing - I usually shut them in the room with some dry food (which they don't really like so it is like a snack food for emergency use)

It is amazing when they do things that for anyone else would be everyday but for us is just - amazing. dd was calling ds2 his pet name recently (Annie - that was when he used to be a little sheepdog in some imaginary game they had when they were 7 year olds) I couldn't believe she was actually being nice to him

Anyway today went alright. I spent a long time walking and taking ds2 on various - SALT and Judo and then some history from Galore Park. Dd tidied her room because she wanted me to order her a new Ikea bed - luckily by the time we had watched the video of it being put together (a Dad and his "handy" daughter) she had realised that her Dad wasnever going to be able to do any of it and that actually her existing bed (with a possible new mattress) was much much nicer. Although I don't think I;ve heard the last of it. currently curled up on her bed with baked potato Netflix and two cats

Really trying to put out of my mind all the paperwork things I have do
car tax
insurance
sort out application for a new assessment of ds2 at Fairley House - I wish I could just pay money to have him tested blind honestly I don't think I can stand all this crossreferencing of reports and other peoples' opinions. But it has to be done - suppose that is the professional way
thousands of birthday cards and emails I haven't bothered with
holiday plans (no) after last Easter's holiday nightmare where we spent £1000 having to fly back at the last minute because dh was ill in London.

Also just read India Knight on aging. I laughed out loud. Although I suspect many people do not have the luxury of pottering as much as she allows for. I agree with her on almost everything although looking her up on net her house is a truly hideous shade of pink. I love pottering but I always feel too stressed to enjoy it so she has hit the nail on the head there.

cooked baked potatoes ham and ready made tomato salsa for supper this eve - everyone ate it in their bedrooms - cannot even face getting out of bed to sit at the table - it is soo lovely up here in my newly tidy bedroom (although moths still keep flying out of the wainscoting

Why don't we just NOT have any links and just keep chatting next (and listening) month? Links are still there from previous month if anyone wants to look them up. It's nice just to have a place to talk and not necessarily feel that we have to do any particular housework.

Dem sorry haven't really asked or perhaps haven't read properly through but how was your TRIP? successful if tiring?

Thank you DEM for volunteering, and totally understand that other fledglings have way more important things that need their attention.

Toffee - yay for your DSs!

Links for tomorrow, Friday 29th May:

Link to the flight plan for an overall summary

Tomorrow’s baby step is chose a Pamper Mission

The Daily focus for Friday is Declutter your Car, Bag and Purse day

Our habit of the month is Moving More

This week we are in Zone 5: The Living Room. Declutter in here for 15 minutes each day.

Our mission in this week’s zone is put something pretty in your living room

The detailed cleaning list for this zone is here for the more experienced Fledglings

Launch pad is here and is full of all the info you need each day, well worth a look.

oh yes forgot today's mega exciting event! dd (in desperation due to lack of the right food in the fridge and cupboard) did a big Ocado food shop for me. I looked on the list after she had ordered it and there was a large number of flapjacks oreos marshmallow bites microwave pouches. Oh yes and tins and tins of rice pudding and lots of cat food. Her priorities.

She sensibly also included lots from my previous order (several months ago) so we have strange things like bok choi and asparagus for dh (he must have been ranting at me about how boring the food was at that point) And mince lots of it.

The trip was good thank you Swan highlighted quite a few interesting things to think about though. Nothing bad, just interesting things about how far ds had progressed. Was a good experience.

Where is everybody?

Hope you're all having a good end to half term, where applicable.

Glad the trip was good, DEM.

at DD's Ocado priorities, swan.

In the end, FIL and S-MIL took the boys off out for a few hours so it wasn't too bad here, and they did at least get one bit of holiday fun. While they were out, I got some more walls cleaned and sandpapering done.

I am tackling ds' room blue I will be a fair while yet as currently playing tetris with the furturniture and have to actually tidy out to even start yes i know priorities such but is lego

I'm here, back from holidays, sat surrounded by suitcases and bags and dirty laundry. DH has predictably just had to pop in to work, although to be fair he did the lions share of the packing and unpacking (so far) as I wasn't feeling well this morning, had a bit of an upset tummy in the night. He also drove the whole four hours, we would normally split that length of journey between us.

another good day

last minute rush to arms getting housework done (badly)

dd unpacked the Ocado order and hid (on my instructions)most of the sweet stuff and crisps under her bed. We still had the boys opening far too many tins of stewed fruit though (I think this is why I never buy in bulk usually)

Ds2 was brilliant today - he went to football by himself with his friend on the bus then played in the rain with 3 people, and then invited them back here (I gave them a lift at this point) and entertained them quite well with Mario and Hide and Seek till 4.30. He did manage to cut himself opening a tin of pineapple (which was of great delight to the St John's Ambulance trained child who kept giving sensible advice which ds2 refused to take - preferring to drip blood round the house )

dd as I say did housework of a sort by unpacking groceries

ds1 was utterly slothful sang a bit revised very little and had to be forced to go out and buy bin bags

Dh went into town and returned very sore tired and rather depressed by his job and the array of half empty tins he found...

I did

swept front porch
4 bags of rubbish bagged up from doorstep
wiped worktops
s and s loo floor
threw dd's clean laundry in her room
threw my clean laundry in my room
lots of washing up of old saucepans
dw loaded and unloaded
dried hoodies of ds2's friends
cooked supper (baked potatoes guacamole (instant) and bacon and tsakiki (instant) for our family

walked a bit
drove a bit
supervised quite a lot of children and their plates and glasses

lay down and had rest for a while - still doing so

blue the thought of painting my house is just an impossibility - even if someone else were to do it. Unless someone was to TAKE MY CHILDREN AWAY FOR AT LEAST TWO WEEKS. You must have decluttered brilliantly.

Whoknows hope you feel better soon. It is exhausting coming back from holidays sometimes. I've only just put away the ski-ing stuff from Feb.

Dem where was trip to? a clue??

Having said it was a good day I did have to break up at least two shouting matches between children - ds1 for one can hardly be in the same room as ds2 for long without them insulting each other. It is restful in a way when dh is not here as it means he doesn't have to get involved (further 3 D stress) but I notice too that it means I am forceful cheerful and authoritative and then....I ....run ... out ....of ...steam...though sheer tiredness of having to be adjudicating constantly and have a very very strong desire to retire to my bed for a liedown. Which is what I'm doing. Then I can only hear the plaintive screams from a long way off

Sorry for ongoing lack of personals - having a busy time. Big waves to you all

Links for tomorrow, Saturday 30th May

Link to the flight plan for an overall summary

Tomorrow’s baby step is Check for birthdays next month, buy your cards and gifts in advance

The Daily focus for Saturday is Family Fun Day

Our habit of the month is Moving More

This week we are in Zone 5: The Living Room. Declutter in here for 15 minutes each day.

There are no missions on the weekend.

The detailed cleaning list for this zone is here for the more experienced Fledglings

Launch pad is here and is full of all the info you need each day, well worth a look.

Ds' room is looking a lot better but there is still a lot to do, and there is going to have to be a lot of sorting out of the lego

Was hoping to have a proper lie in but apparently i was needed this morning and there has been an influx of texts so I am awake, well my eyes are open.

SC hope you weekend is going ok

whoknows hope you are feeling better soon

toffee ds1 - wow!

Blue good luck with all the house move prep you have going on.

Grey thank you very much for leading the thread this month!

Meerkat hope you and meerkitten are doing well.

I will set the thread up tomo, I am pondering Swan's suggestion of no daily links. I am thinking if there is a way to link in the op so that you can easy access the information. The long timers are ok, but it might be confusing to newbies who wander in. Any thoughts?

The OP is at the top even when I flip the thread so it is always there at least on my Mnsnet screen?

I woke up feeling quite hale and hearty and even [whisper] productive...so have made chili for tacos with the mince that came yesterday. Looked up a rhubarb recipe. Sent ds1 for a long walk. (he has returned unfortunately) Dd is still asleep.

But alas have had a horrible set to with ds1 -not physical but just his level of denial fear and aggression over school work makes me feel a bit shaky really - bit like your description of the dog guarding his blanket/bed SC

Before half term started we had a rule that he did 2 hours from 10am to 12am of revision every day. Rapidly got changed to 11am to 1pm then decided he needed his ipad as a soundtrack then when I took ipad away started watching West Side story saying it was music revision on DVD player (handheld one) Won't tidy his desk. Won't take out his science books (he has GSCE in two weeks). I don't mind the lack of desk tidying or the lying around but it is clear that he is really really unable to face the revision in any form and just doing anything anything to put off looking at the book - at which point he will realise he doesn't know anything and feel bad (which he doesn't want to feel)

It is not helping that dh has gone off to work related function again - although even if he were here he would literally have to sit next to ds1 encouraging him to get the slightest bit of work done. AARRGH. I know he is going to get a C (this is only foundation paper of GSCE core science) I am resigned to it. I just feel it is my DUTY to encourage him to revise/work and all that is happening is violent confrontation - GO AWAY LEAVE ME ALONE STOP ATTACKING ME GET OUT OF MY ROOM etc. IVE DONE SOME. ITS MY ROOM. ITS MY IPAD. ITS THE HOLIDAYS. No amount of reasonable talking when he is not cornered seems to have an effect when when he is cornered ifysim....

I wish he would just get a D and then the wretched school would have to admit it was a stupid idea to do a GSCE when he is so immature. And retake next year.

Although I have to admit reading the lovely India Knight has cheered me up immensely and I am not going to take it to heart. If he does 30 mins it will make me happier than nothing at all. That is just his character alas. With all the good bits too.

Ds2 is also obsessively pursuing some plan to do with football telly fest pm and his friend whose house he wants to go over to (friend unfortunately out all day so this will brew whole day)

Deep breath. Have had shower and enough sleep so really everything is fine. [Apart from garden still a bombsite from construction work - nothing happening till June 18th now) Dh really low from his leg. He has reminded me categorically that we are not going to apply for this ECHP for ds2. That is a relief but brings me out in a cold sweat every now and then - just accepting that we are not going to DO anything much except what we have been doing..

And my bedroom is still gloriously tidy Hurrah!!!

SC hope all the guests are eating croissants with you now and putting all your fears at rest and if they are not, hope it goes down in the family annals as an eventful weekend. Enjoy blessing of church community too sometimes they make me want to shrivel up and hide in a corner but most of the time - they really really help (even if not with housework !)

Swan - him taking the GCSE won't count in the school stats anyway, I would step back and just let him learn the hard way. Why schools feel the need to put kids through GCSEs at 14/15 I don't know. So many kids just aren't ready for it. Good luck.

Right about to throw on clothes and head off for a bit of a road trip. Just need a break from sorting out ds' room, and looking at everything that needs doing in mine. Been taking berroca recently and it has made a serious improvement on my energy levels. Normally take a fairly high level of B vits anyway but it also seems to have helped my ability to sleep so must sit down and have a look into where B vit deficiancy affects sleep.

Oh and for the record - I am productive in Pjs despite the Fat fairy's view on the matter so nerh

I eat loads of nuts and red meat and dark green vegetables like Kale so I think that covers my B vitamins - usually have no problems with sleep either though I'm always very tired after exertion. Very interesting about the Berocca - perhaps I should try that too Dem

ds2 and I have been crying tears of laughter over various in jokes. He has made a wonderful video of two socks talking to each other (rip off of the Apollo sketch on shoes he told me) saying don't mention the F word - Flip Flop..
Ds1 has continued being a procrastination artiste and started screaming at me when I asked him whether milk contained protein - definitely not he said - how could it? (This was the science topic on Food Groups) Then he started screaming when I mentioned Lipase was the enzyme which digested Lipids. Lipids mum don't be ridiculous there is no SUCH THING IT is LIQUIDS.. oh dear.
Dh has returned and ate some of the chili tacos for which I am grateful.

Dd is now demanding I write a speech from Pope Urban calling for a Crusade and define The Great Schism. Frankly I do not think I am going to do any of this any more...NO MORE