Calling all hoarders out there......why?

[muriel76]

My DH is a bit of a hoarder. Some of his family are the same but particularly his mum, she seems to keep everything. They both like to also display pointless things ie books that will never be/never have been read etc.

Don't get me wrong, it is not a big deal or anything but I do want to understand why. It's hard to understand as my mum is the complete opposite and I am the same. DH and I have agreed to give the house (another!) big clear out and it would help me to hear a hoarder's view!

(Obviously I have talked with him about it many times BTW, I am just looking for other people's more neutral insights)

Thanks for any replies.

NC - bugger! OOppps Oh well... as you say, you can now invite a friend over and have one each!! Good storage certainly helps - but so does knowing when you do actually have enough - it just needs emptying out (not saying you do!).

Solo - you are on a roll!! Well done!! There's no need for the - there's a big difference between keeping a few of your childrens' things and 'hoarding'. As an adult I love the things my parents have kept and it's lovely to see future generations playing with them :) and even if they don't they're still nice to have.

TSC - well done! Books are hard to part with (well, for me anyway and seemingly half of MN!!).

Goodynuff - please don't start on 'digital clutter' I've had a right nightmare with photo software/hard drives/laptops.... grrr. I now have a NEW 2tb ext hd. Wish me luck! At least it's not messy clutter Digitally storing the kids art work is ok... but you have to keep some of the originals as well!!

Exotic - I don't think that's an especially helpful comment to make on a hoarding thread!! Gahhhhhhhh

Can I join please?

I downsized from a huge Victorian terrace to a council house and I can't do anything in my room other than walk to my bed and back to the door, my kitchen is dreadful as well. This is after so many runs to the tip and a big skip before moving. Feels so neverending at times:(

I try to clear it out, but it seems never to get any better. And I don't perticularly buy things. IT just seems to breed and multiply on it's own:(

PG - I'll get back to you.

Yes you can :)

Do you think it's a case of being a hoarder or just a by product of down sizing?

If you are a hoarder... what sort of hoarder are you?

An accidental hoarder, if that makes sense. I just tend to never throw things away... I'll have an epic sorting day once every Sheffield flood, and will sift like a demon for a day or so. Then will lapse back into just shoving things in boxes, drawers and under the bed:(

Even when I lived in the bigger house, there were piles and boxes of crap everywhere. Overwhelming, shaming and yet impossible to deal with all at the same time.

I sometimes think that it would be a blessing for the place to be gutted by a mini localised hurricane one day, to just destroy the lot so I can start from scratch, but I can't get that image to overlay me being the hurricane - if that makes any sense to you?

The kids are away for a couple of days next week, and between all the appointments I have scheduled I have set myself an afternoon aside to try to clear at least two boxes from my room, which will inevitably involve me throwing away a small bag of crap and repacking the rest of it into a smaller but still there box:(

We moved a lot when I was a child. Once into a caravan where I literally had nothing left from my old room bar a few books and some clothes. And like another poster I once came home to find that my parents had rehomed the dogs, one of whom was mine'.

:(

I hear you re the hurricaine PG as I've often thought the same. Or a fire. But I'd be gutted to lose the really important things like photographs...:(
I'd be in real trouble if I had a flood. Can you imagine the mess?!!!

PH :( I'm not sure it's as accidental as you say it is, if it was, once you got started you'd be fine throwing loads out. Why not aim to do just one box - but be ruthess.

Solo - yes, you need a 'selective' fire

I am so tied, but happy!
I have finished my entire bedroom!
Closet was emptied, and only what fit and I loved went back in, on matching wooden hangers! It is sorted, and there is still empty space.
The dressers were treated the same, and I even have an empty draw left over.
I was ruthless, and got rid of so much stuff.
Tomorrow the linen closet and storage unit.

milkshake - yes, I'm only keeping the stuff that's both good and I like! For example, SIL2 gave me two bin bags of 9-24mo clothes last weekend. I immediately went through it, keeping one large carrier bag worth (into loft), about 10 items out that ds can wear this winter, one bin bag for Freecycle (offered to a good cause who then never showed, so now offered to next polite person...grr...), and one carrier bag that's gone to the charity shop.

But that's still more clothes for ds than fit into the chest of drawers he has, which only held all his clothes when he was under a year.

It could be much worse - SIL2 mum is a force of nature and insists on scouring Freecycle in her local very posh area, and then unloading stuff on SIL2 every week when she babysits - but then gets hugely offended and shouts at SIL2 the next week if she's got rid of any of it! Given that SIL2 and dn live in a small flat, it's amazing she copes - giving stuff to me is one way but we now have SIL2mum collecting stuff 'for notcitrus'...

At least when most of it ends up in charity shops/Freecyclers near me, it's appreciated...

I cleared out loads on maternity leave - I went through all my clothes, and had a clothes swap party with some friends where I went with 3 bin bags and returned with 5 wonderful items that fit perfectly. I also sold loads on Ebay as I had the time to pack stuff and walk to the post office lots - I had to do the walking on doctors' orders anyway.
So hopefully this mat leave I'll be able to do a bit more. Though I'm just about to smash up some horrible fitted wardrobes to go in a skip, so the storage problem really isn't going to be resolved in a hurry...

Well done Goodynuff :)

Goodynuff - brilliant!!!

Have you actually taken all the other clothes away from the house yet? What did you/are you going to do with them? I bet your bedroom feels so spacious, light, relaxing and airy.... lovely!

NC - you are doing well as well. LOL - all you need is SILs's Mum as well - gahhhh but as you say, at least you can charity shop/freecycle, it's appreciated and she doesn't even have to know about it! Mind you - I think SIL2 needs to put her foot down or she wont get moved in her flat! Have fun removing the wardrobes - it will leave a nice big space for the wardrobes you do want!!

Baby sling going today, old dog cushion, baby hangers, books for abroad...should mention that I'm delivering several of these too...trying to secure my place in Heaven .
Not heard from moses basket lady yet.

Well done to those getting sorted; I'm so geen!!!

Solo - your place in heaven is already secured :) but this might get you an extra angel or two to tend to your every need! I hope MB lady gets in touch - we don't want anything slowing down the process!!

You're so geen?? Local word or did you mean keen?

I'm meant GREEN!!! hehehe!

Oh yes - that was the other logical explanation

I took plastic hangers, books, an old phone, picture frames, and other such to the Sally Ann, along with a lot of clothes.
I threw out bags and bags of stuff about 50 odd socks, lingerie that was tacky, or didn't fit, or looked kinda cheap, stained or crap clothes...
I found 3 note pads, 2 memo pads, and about 25 pens and pencils, they all got moved back to our office area in the living room.
Much, much more had to be sorted, homed or cleaned.
I worked unitl about 3am, but it just felt so good.
At the end, I got to climb into a freshly made bed

I have come to the realization that I will not be Ebaying stuff. I figured I could make about 400$.
I had planned to make some money off selling quite a bit, but I know that I will end up only listing half, and of that, probably 1/4 will sell, but it will all still be in my house.

Part of me is feeling guilty about not rehoming more, or saving stuff for people who might need it, but it had to happen. If I start to slow down, I might stop.
I'd rather have the guilt about not reusing than the guilt of having an overwhelming house, iyswim?

:) Well done Goodynuff.

I delivered the books and the sling today, so they've gone. I left hangers and large dog cushion outside my house and I hope they're gone when I get back.
I've said to the sling lady that I'll have a dig about to see if I have any baby girl things and that I'd drop them off if I did.
Slow. But sure :)

Sweet news Solo!

Goodynuff - you are on a roll too - way to go!! I can't believe how much stuff you have rehomed - and you have rehomed it - you just haven't charged anyone and as you say, you could have made some money, but it's a lot of effort and you are usually left with loads of stuff that never gets sold or taken anywhere and you have done it already!! Some stuff just needs to go in the bin too really doesn't it....and how lovely to climb into a nice bed with fresh sheets - bliss!! If I won the lottery I'd have someone come and put fresh sheets on the bed every day - my bliss!!

Solo - great stuff :) Did Bassinet Lady ring you and collect it? If not go down your list and contact the next one or before you know it - it will be in the corner somewhere full of stuff! How nice you have a good place for any little girl bits you find - it makes it easier to part with things when you know they will be appreciated.

I have chucked out 1) a permanently deflated spacehopper 2) a set of plastic boules with 3 boules missing and 3) an ancient almost empty packet of plant food today.

[tidying the shed emoticon].

I emptied one of the bin bags in my bath.... only about 10 more to go

Hey hey!!! Well done everyone! :) Lewis don't blush love, you have one less to do :) that's an acheivement in my book.

Bibbity sheds need doing too, so good on you...mine needs a sort out, but that's the last thing on my list to do.

Moses basket lady hasn't come back to me, but I'll give her a chance; I know she's very pg and already has 7 Dc's

Have put the other gorgeous one up for a fiver...no asks yet though.