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Home ed

Find advice from other parents on our Homeschool forum. You may also find our round up of the best online learning resources useful.

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Original poster

Am I the only HE'er who is glad that the others have gone back to school?

181 replies

singingmum · 03/09/2007 10:19

Having watched the behaviour of local school children over the hols,I am so happy that they are no longer going to be running riot on the streets all day while their parents let them cause havoc.I know that not all parents let their ds's run riot but a large majority have this summer on this estate and personally I'd like to kill them.Harsh I know,but we've had bored dc's everywhere and have suffered from bullying to our dc's and also damage to our fencing.I'm sick of parents(and it's a couple of families inparticular who are responsible)letting this happen.It's as though they have switched off to their dc's behaviour or aren't used to dealing with it as they don't see them enough or something.
Ok so I know that some people will take offence but we have had bored dc's since the second week of the hols and I just am so glad that these dc's are now off the streets and finally will have something to keep their attention.
I'm not saying that all parents who send their dc's to school are like this but the estate I live on was so lovely until someone started letting houses to tenants that the council and others had evicted etc. and now we have to put up with the side effects of this.
Apologies to anyone who is interested in their children but why can't these parents get a handle on these dc's????
Rant over

OP posts:

themildmanneredjanitor · 03/09/2007 10:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

singingmum · 03/09/2007 10:55

The point is that I'm looking at the He dc's (mine and reports from other He'ers who have noticed a diff also people in general)and have noticed that it is the school dc's that are bored and,in the cases in question,ignored.As i say I know it's not all school dc's who's parents haven't bothered with their dc's but it does seem prevalent.He dc's work through hols and are not as bored(they do get bored but usually don't go around recking others property etc.)
Also i am more relieved that my dc's haven't acted like this when we give them a holiday from lessons as they always do something.
The prob is the dc's around here have been allowed to do these things.I have seen when in my own garden the way the parents are dealing with the prob and it's not pretty.I have heard the words 'bugger off and do something' 'So what i'm going out with your mum' and the ever classic 'Bother someone else go on play down the other end of the estate,I can't be bothered right now'
Examples like these make me realise that I am so happy doing what I do and that I wish these parents would at least try.
Also as I've said I'm not generalising the parents just talking about the case I have been dealing with all summer and now I can get back to normal.No more wondering which panel they've kicked in now or if my 7yr old dd is going to get stuff lobed at her in the garden.
I can handle noise and in many ways the school hols are good as my ds and dd get more time with some of their school ed friends but it's the bad behaviour and the atrociousness of the parents attitude that drives me nuts.If you say anything to these dc's you get their parents hassling you and I just don't need that,no one does.
Although interested in general experiences I was wondering if others in the same position as myself had like experiences or different ones altogether.

OP posts:

Isababel · 03/09/2007 11:00

But Singingmum, that it is not about HEing or not, that is about having the wrong neighbours.

Original poster

singingmum · 03/09/2007 11:08

Partially yes it is about having the wrong neighbours but it is also to do with the difference between HE dc's and school dc's.
My dc's have excellent manners,they can concentrate for more than 1hr,they are helpful and respect others.The majority of the children who go to school however have none of this.Maybe it's only in our area I don't know but my point was that a s a HE'er I am relieved about these disruptive dc's being removed from the streets and in some ways it feels wrong to be glad that these dc's are shut up in a classroom all day when in my mind for a lot of them this is not the best situation.
Also as I said when my son was in the school system(nursery for a short time)I didn't feel so strongly that I was glad all the other children who went to school were not around.In fact I even missed the sounds of them playing and enjoying themselves(as you can tell this was before the probs started)
I was looking to find out if other HE'ers have the same experiences as I have

OP posts:

themildmanneredjanitor · 03/09/2007 11:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

expatinscotland · 03/09/2007 11:40

K, that's where you lost me, singing.

Not all school-educated children are ill-mannered. Where'd you get that idea?

Isababel · 03/09/2007 11:40

I think you are spending far too much time locked in your house, if that is your appreciation of the average child.

TellusMater · 03/09/2007 11:41

OK - you are taking a very small group (your dc) and assuming they are representative foa larger group (home ed'ed children). You are also taking another small group (disruptive children) and assuming they are representative of a massive group (school ed'ed children). This is absolutely not valid.

The children you describe are a pain in the arse and I can see why you are happy to be rid of them. But don't extrapolate too far.

Doodledootoo · 03/09/2007 11:41

Message withdrawn

pirategirl · 03/09/2007 11:42

there are good and bad kids in all walks of life, and how they are educated isn't the main prob. I know some right sods who are both home eduated and some right sods who are schoolchildren.

Sounds like your estate has a problem, with nowhere for kids to go, and parents, who can't be assed or havent the inclination to bother.

Yes it is annoying, other peoples kids can be annoying, and as i said before, I would be relieved, but soem home educated kids have no sense of respect or manners either, as 'some' are allowed to dictate, just as some school sent kids run the environment.

Fireflyfairy2 · 03/09/2007 11:52

I'm wondering about the people you associate with if you find them all rude & disrespectful.

You say you're glad they're removed from the streets... they are in school, not jail as your posts suggest they should be!

"My dc's have excellent manners,they can concentrate for more than 1hr,they are helpful and respect others" As does my 5yr old. What do you think they learn in school? If not to sit still & concentrate, to help their teachers, to respect their classmates.

Home educated children are no better than school educated children.. Nor are their parents.

Don't tar everyone with the same brush as your neighbours please

Mhamai · 03/09/2007 11:55

Not even going to get drawn in with the He v Dc bolleaux but will have to pull you up in one area, as a mature adult studying for a degree, I happen to know that ideally adults should break after 40 minutes of learning, so your hypothesis of the he dc being better because they can keep their attention for over an hour is quite alarming to say the least!

Mhamai · 03/09/2007 11:56

He v school ed dc.

BreeVanDerCampLGJ · 03/09/2007 12:03

What a load of piffle.

If you live on a sink estate move house.

bluemountainriver · 03/09/2007 13:11

We are an he family and no, I can't say I'm glad the children have gone back to school. The children you talk about I'm sure would love to be he too, but unfortunately their parents for whatever reason don't he. Give them a fresh start - include them in games and activities you do with your dc or just talk to them. You might just find they're not so bad after all.

EscapeFrom · 03/09/2007 13:14

Isababel · 03/09/2007 13:15

EscapeFrom · 03/09/2007 13:16

You are better than your naighbours in every way, singingmum. Well done.

EscapeFrom · 03/09/2007 13:16

neighbours.

Oh, the burn of sweet sweet shame.

bubblerock · 03/09/2007 14:11

"The children you talk about I'm sure would love to be he too, but unfortunately their parents for whatever reason don't he."

Do you really believe that they would prefer to be at home with their parents than in school with their mates??

Original poster

singingmum · 03/09/2007 15:01

Interesting how some don't read whole post.

I have stated that in my experience this is the case.I have also stated that other places may be different.
The majority of people I speak with in this area and a few of the surrounding towns have the same prob with dc's these days.
Yes i have mainly my own dc's to go by but other HE'ers have noticed the problem to.
I never ststed that it was the majority of dc's who are schooled everywhere.In fact I was asking if anyone else had the same problem.
As for getting out of the house more,I have agrophobia and that problem does limit my experience of dc's but lots of families have moved away and others moved to the area and still there is the same noticable differences in behaviour.
This is not a sink estate far from it as it is actually in the most a nice estate but the long hols etc has caused a major prob.

I have tried to get the dc's engaged in things when they first trie playing with my dc's and got bored but they all have the same attitude to adults.Not interested.
As for concentrating for an hour or more in school they are expected to do lessons of an hour but none can even try to be interested in anything for more than 1/2 an hour at best.My dc's often don't want to stop concentrating if they like what they are doing.

Escapefrom:-I don't think I'm better just sick of trying my best(which is far from perfect I admit ,again no one is)and having to put up withn all the fallout from people who can't be bothered to try even.

Oh and a lot of dc's would love to be HE and,yes, would love that extra time with their parents.

OP posts:

Original poster

singingmum · 03/09/2007 15:12

Just wish to point out that I don't HE because of the phobia.It came after through other things.
Also my dc's go out regularly on trips with their father and myself when I am able.

OP posts:

Theclosetpagan · 03/09/2007 15:31

As regards your OP singingmum - I think you'll find most of these children are fabulously well behaved in school where there are adults around them who:

Show an interest in them.
Are consistent and
Reward the good behaviour

Children do get bored in the long school holidays and the problems you describe are sadly not new. Don't know what the answer is but I don't think it's to do with HE or school education. Your children are able to sit and concentrate - lucky you. Not all children are blessed with this ability though - even with encouragement and support they will struggle.
My DS starts school this week with minor concentration probs BUT he gets this from me and I was exactly the same at his age. I can concentrate perfectly now though - sometimes it comes with maturity. I accept DS as he is and just encourage him. HE or at school - he will struggle with this until maturity helps him overcome the impulsive nature he's been blessed with.

Runnerbean · 03/09/2007 15:35

I can't wait for the school kids to go back so we can have parks, museums, galleries etc to ourselves again!!
I think it's a shame for 'schooled' kids (and the parents) that their experience of having to go to such places are when they are mobbed!
Because everyone has to squeeze visits and holidays into weekends and holidays when everyone else is as well!
AND they have to pay extra for it!!

It's not particular children I object to, just the volume of them!!

Original poster

singingmum · 03/09/2007 15:42

Thanks for that answer Theclosetpagan.
I wasn't trying to generalise all of the dc's in Britain in fact I only want to know if I'm living in an unusual area or otherwise.
I understand that some cannot concentrate(my brothers both have adhd)but I am just at end of tether after yet another school holiday of chaos.Just wish it would get better but the hols seem to have been longer these days.

Runnerbean,I know what you mean.Can be chaotic.Saying that,my 2 are now booked in to a museum visit at Cardiff museum for a HE day.They love it as they can talk to others who are HE and it's not to crowded or overrun

OP posts:

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