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Are there any benefits of Primary school that HE can't usually provide?

613 replies

carolinecordery · 03/06/2012 19:52

Hello all, I haven't registered my DD for Reception, which she would be eligible to start in September.
I was just wondering if you thought there were any benefits of primary school that HE can't provide. What things are good about primary school that are only available through attending?
I'm planning to HE and am convinced of the benefits of doing so, but want a rounded picture. It's easy to think of loads of things that would be, relatively, a bit crap about primary school, but is there ANY really good reason to go? DD's non-resident dad would rather she went.
Thanks, Caroline

OP posts:
seeker · 10/06/2012 10:03

"Very long time lurker here: Seeker, if you don't mind me asking, why did your parents decide to HE you? I'm really interested to know how they decided to do it, and how they found out about it was possible. Thanks."

I'm afraid I don't really know- it was just what happened! We did travel quite a lot- so it could have been to some extent for convenience. I remember my father being very uncomplimentary about the village primary school where we lived, so that must have been part of it. But how they found out they could do it I have no idea. it was a "proper" formal arrangement though- I remember regular visits from what I assume were LEA inspectors....

nelehluap · 10/06/2012 10:10

seeker....just wanted to say thank you...brilliant post explaining your own personal experience of being HE. It think that's just as vitally important to hear from someone who has gone through HE and come out the other side as it is for us parents to decide if we're doing the right thing. :)

Colleger · 10/06/2012 10:14

Reply to what seeker? Genuine question - Ican't remember what was said a few days ago but if it's negative maybe we should just move on and try and get on, which I'm more than happy to do. :)

seeker · 10/06/2012 10:28

Well, bearing in mind that you, in pretty offensive terms, were demanding that I "share" my experience, and asked me a series of specific questions I was sort of expecting more than "thank you"!

Colleger · 10/06/2012 10:43

I think this is the problem with the Internet as you read my posts in a different way to how I write them. It is ppossible that everytime you view a post from me you expect it to be negative. I admit to doing the same up until the post before this one. I'm not sure how much I can thank you. You asked if I wanted to know more (an example of me taking that question at face value) and I did and then left the caveat of friendship. I said I was very grateful, is that not enough? In not sure how else to show my gratitude?

If you think I was offensive then I apologise for that although I think it's important to look at one's reactions and perceptions to certain posts - heck I need to do the same! Wink

Anyway, I write all this with a very chilled attitude and any question has been genuine, not antagonistic.

exoticfruits · 10/06/2012 11:42

In view of Michael Gove's new proposals for what a 5 year old is expected to do I think that I might be inclined to keep them at home for a while!
I knew some poems by heart at 5 years old-there is no way I could have stood up and recited them in front of a class-I was far too shy.
It appears to set up many children for failure at an early age. Sometimes government proposals make you despair Sad

Colleger · 10/06/2012 11:49

One of my children missed out reception because he was moved up a year. It did have a knock on effect especially with handwriting as he missed out on a year of fine motor control. This had a knock on effect with keeping up and put him off written subjects when he'd previously loved humanities and English.

exoticfruits · 10/06/2012 11:55

The new curriculum means that children will have to start their school career -to quote-'sit correctly at a table, holding a pencil comfortably and correctly'.
Some are simply not ready.

Colleger · 10/06/2012 12:09

My 11 year old still can't manage the 'sit' and my 13 year old has shocking table manners and can't hold a pencil comfortably. What a load of nonsense. These things only work if they are being mirrored at home and usually, they are not.

exoticfruits · 10/06/2012 12:14

When many come into school without any life skills and a poor vocabulary it is an impossible task!
On the other hand you get poor little 3 yr old who have to pass tests for selective schools-and parents want tutors!
Sometimes I think the world has gone mad and I would be better off being self sufficient in the middle of nowhere, opting out altogether!

Colleger · 10/06/2012 12:27

I want to do that but traditional hubby is always looking overly shoulder!

5madthings · 10/06/2012 15:22

i scotland the system is much more flexible, my friend ds2 is the same age almost as my ds4 (actually her ds2 is a few monhts older) he is allowed to stay in nursery for an extra year and then still start in reception or the equivalanent to that in scotland,t hey allow this fairly easily it seems and they dont then have to skip a year to catch up they just stay in that year group. it works fine in scotland so why are we so inflexible with the starting age in the england? this was one of the main things that made me look into and do home ed, having my ds1 be late aug born adn then ds2 is july, they were NOT ready for school the sept after their 4th bday, when they did start school age 9 and 6 they were fine, in fact i think many children would do just fine starting in yr 1 or rec, people make out that its not good etc, but it certainly didnt harm my 2, ds1 started full time school in yr 5 and is now in yr 8 at high school, ds2 started in yr 2 and is now in yr 5, in no way has it affected their 'schooling' they both settled well, made friends easily and a teacher that ds2 had would 'never had guessed' he didnt go to school until he was 6 yr of age. we have had compliments on how well rounded their knowledge etc was and that variety and depth of it being much more than they could have learnt in school, but equally any parents can do that by doing stuff at home out of school hours, tho obviously its easier when you dont have to fit in school as well and we have certainly carried on supplementing our childs eduction, well just living life and learning and reading, school is a small part of a childs education in many ways.

my ds4 is due to start in sept, in many ways he seems ready, he does 2 full days at pre-school is actually really good with his phonics and numbers etc, not that we have done anything to make him this way, it just is 'his thing' and he seems to have picked it up easily. but his pencil control is crap so tho he can spell words out, he cant write them down! he just doesnt have the fine motor control yet, which for a just 4 yr old is not unusual. he can get dressed and undressed and is very sociable so i have no doubt he will love most aspect of reception, but i think 5 full days may be a bit much, so i suspect i will do what i did with ds3 and he will have 'sick days' ie i think it would do him more good to have a relaxed day at home or out at the park etc with me, ds3 used to do mon and tue at school, then wed at home and thu, fri at school. the ht actually agreed it made sense, otherwise he was just too tired by thu/fri to do anything meaningful at school.

and exotic i often think about moving to a little island, going all self sufficient etc, i think it would be great, esp with primary school aged kids, not so sure about teens tho!

BleepyBloop · 16/06/2012 23:48

Sorry I'm arriving late to the party. What was the original question? PS vs HE. Uhmmm. My DS attends a few extra curricular activities so I've met other mums with children around the same age of my son. So now he's got a tidy circle of friends-none of whom are HE. I went to school my whole life and I had a couple of friends at the most and I am socially awkward -yet my HE kid is a social butterfly! He is also a chatterbox so I can't imagine him "sitting down and keeping quiet" as schools like children to do. I definitely know he couldn't have handled school when he was 4. Now at 5 he loves science and math but in many ways he is still very inmature.

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