Husband and I are going away for a week... how much to pay the babysitter?

[LondonLisa]

My husband and I will be going on our first holiday away from our 22-month-old daughter. We have someone from her nursery staying with her for the 7 days we are away. This will mean the sitter will take our daughter home from nursery (6-ish) and stay all night and bring her to nursery the next day. Repeat. This will also overlap 2 weekends.
Any idea what fair pay would be? I don't want to skimp but I also don't want to be... ostentatious, if that makes sense.
We usually pay this sitter £8/hr if that helps.
Any suggestions are appreciated.

I can't imagine feeling happy leaving my child for a week when I have never left them for a night. Does seem a very odd OP.

You're entitled to your opinion, the young, and I'm entitled to mine.

Maybe it involves an early start and late return so sitter would have to stay over those nights too ? Might be cheaper to take the child along and go somewhere with childcare available on site.

True, expat.

We only go away if we can leave our children with nanny plus a relative, but I'm not shocked at the idea that you might leave your daughter with a worker from her nursery. Presumably you and your daughter know her well and she knows how to look after babies. I'd just ask her how much she wants to be paid, and go over what-to-do-in-an-emergency arrangements many times.

Mine have always been perfectly happy to be left. I left my pfb with my mum and dad to go to Brazil for a week for work once when he was about 24 months(we lived in a different country so though he knew them well he wasn't exactly used to them being his carers, though his nanny was there too). He didn't mention me once for the whole week . 6 years later we still have a great relationship and he still doesn't mind if I go away (provided he gets some fabulous gift at the end of it ).

aye, so it's not a seven day trip. why the ?

oh good idea liz!
Op you could ask about childcare onsite. Then you can spend time away with DH as much as you want, but still have DD nearby.

Hold any opinion you like expat - it's fine by me. I just think your post of 13.08 was kind of unnecessary to your point.

Quint - leaving your 2 year old for a week with a qualified childcarer may be something most of us wouldn't consider but to start bandying around suggestions of adoption is really belittling to those with real heartache behind their adoptions.

People do all sorts of misguided things with their children - even you and I but the vast majority of them aren't close to the foothills of needing the separation from birth parents and the life-long trauma that it brings.

To take a child away from imperfect parents and give them to another set of (inevitably) imperfect parents is not something to be taken so lightly, for the childs sake.

which is another weird thing, if you ask me, but then i enjoy spending time with my children.

I enjoy spending time with the weans, but I'm going to really enjoy palming them off on my family and sitting on the beach with a book and a big jar of iced tea.

Not sure what to pay but would agree with others that you try one night away first - you may find thats quite enough.

Also perhaps look into holidays where you can get a nanny to give you a break - Scott Dunn used to do those.

You see my first thoughts on reading the OP were "lucky cow" to be able to bogger off ona nice holiday for a week without the kids. But obviously that was just a second's worth of reaction and I don't really think that. Honest.

No, don't leave the child alone! I wasn't suggesting that! I'm going to leave now, before I plant seeds for ideas that I don't want to actually plant.

"i don't see how it's possible for a 7 day holiday to overlap two weekends, btw"

Leave Sunday come back Saturday - thats 7 days? Am I missing something?

I think the first time I was away from DD it was for a week, or 5 days anyway, and she was 1. She was also at home with her dad, so hardly the same as the OP, but I think it's possible to think that perhaps the situation outlined in the OP isn't ideal while being equally at the posters suggesting that going away at all without your children, at whatever age it seems, means you don't see them as part of the family.

I do wonder whether the OP has actually read MN before though...

Don't disagree with the (possibly hairy handed trucker) OP about going away for a holiday.

However I do disagree with her leaving her dd for at least 9-10 days (inc weekend) when she has never been left before, with a nursery worker who is presumably working a full day, and then going back to a strange house to look after someone elses child. By the end of the week the babysitter will be tired and crabby and the baby will be distressed. Not ideal really.

Plus you don't seem to have discussed a price upfront which is, you must admit, odd. If you were putting your cat in a cattery you would find out how much it would cost. And arrangements for your dd are far more importnant than that.

At least she doesn't have to go through the sheer hell that has been the process for getting a child its first British passort.

Catteries don't come cheap these days, either!

Have to have the animal's vaccinations certificate, too.

hmm, spose so. i wouldn't think of that as two weekends, as it happens. where is the OP, she can sort it out.

expat - get your DH (he's british right?) to adopt them then they qualify for a british passport automatically. MInd you it wasn;t exactly the easy option...

Oh gawd Aitch, not you with the "well, I enjoy spending time with my children" line? I do too. I also enjoy spending time without them.

i wouldn't think of that as two weekends - no me neither but if you re-read she said "overlapped" two weekends.