Who and how much to tip (USA)

[SleepDreamThinkHuge]

Hi,

I am thinking of going to USA maybe this summer or early next year. Thinking of New York or California.

Of course the USA has a different tipping culture to UK. In the USA, when you go how much do you generally tip, who do you tip?

@mathanxiety ”it’s swings and roundabouts”. Yes, yes, yes! Exactly. Some people tip more and others less. It’s swings and roundabouts. You have finally understood. Well done.

@Theelephantinthecastle Ah, millennials...that does make sense as they're the airbnb generation so more accustomed to all conclusive pricing. And now I feel old!😂

It shouldn't be swings and roundabouts - that's my point here - unless you get some sort of perverse pleasure from making an obtuse point about a country you've chosen to visit but on the cheap.

So many people are outraged here about 'dancing and twirling', and now you come along smugly hoping someone else will make up the slack.

Do the math before you choose your restaurant. If you can't afford the expected tip, then you need to modify your dining plans.

It's not noblesse oblige.

At last, we agree on something! Tipping IS very much noblesse oblige, and as you have confirmed, these are standard costs of buying the goods and service - so why continue to call it tipping?

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And there we have it, call it by what it is - a mandatory CHARGE - and everybody will understand and comply. It's not a 'tip', those are given because the person giving them, wants to. A charge is to be paid at the rate specified, regardless.

Sorted.

Ah, millennials...that does make sense as they're the airbnb generation so more accustomed to all conclusive pricing. And now I feel old!😂

I'm considerably more 'mature' than a millennial now(!), and I must admit to being surprised at first to see separate cleaning charges listed in the prices for Air BnBs, as these would normally all be included as standard within the stated cost for holiday lets; BUT I have no issue with this, as however they choose to break it down, Air BnB does give you the total price that you will need to pay to purchase the accommodation - leaving you with all the info you need to be able to decide to accept that price and book or reject it and go elsewhere. No unspoken expectations of extra money that you should feel duty-bound to pay to the host on top, but which they nevertheless don't deign to tell you when stating a falsely low price.

*All-inclusive

The US is expensive. For 3 weeks I would take at least $1000 in small notes for tips. That's only $47 per day, so actually you will probably need double that, so $2000 for tips alone

That's more than the cost of an entire holiday to Europe for DH and me, including flights, accommodation and car hire!

.

Yes an absolute no no

It never used to be like that

I am trying to think when I last stayed in a hotel that had luggage person (bellhop). Even my dad who stays in naice hotels, doesn't take me to hotels like that.

I agree about bell service. Even in higher end hotels, you can take your own luggage up if you choose.

@CarolinaInTheMorning @lljkk Same here, no bellhops or doorman in even the nicer hotels for years now. I only travel with a carry-on bag (usually) and the front desk clerk generally asks if I'll be needing any help and I just reply "all set"!

Hotels are definitely streamlining these days, partly to cut costs and partly due to worker shortages.

I agree about bell service. Even in higher end hotels, you can take your own luggage up if you choose.

That is good to know that they have the service only should you want to use it, but I would still expect that it could end up as an additional 'tax' on disabled and elderly people, who may not have the luxury of choice.

Is it pedantry running amok that's preventing you from understanding what the word 'tipping' means in America?

Or some quaint notion that you can take a British concept - same word but different connotation entirely - and apply it wherever you go? In other words, a Quixotic insistence on imposing the Anglocentric world view on a culture that actually isn't Anglo at all, despite outward appearances.

Travel is supposed to broaden the mind.

Goodness, you are so angrycentric angry and sarcastic @mathanxiety

This isn't posters being "anglocentric". Posters have repeatedly stated that the tipping culture in the US is completely different from other countries they have visited. Maybe you should travel more and broaden your mind.

The bottom line is that the tipping culture is pricing holidays in the US out of reach for many people. You may not have a cost of living crisis where you live, but it is very much a problem in the UK.

The bottom line is that the tipping culture is pricing holidays in the US out of reach for many people.

Changing the tipping system won't make restaurants, hotels, etc. more affordable; services paid by tipping will be covered by price rises overall. The main objection voiced by many on this thread is that the US system is difficult to understand. The OP was asking for guidance, which was forthcoming, mainly from US based posters. Some of us have been a trifle frustrated by the level of what appears to be "faux bafflement." I have a sneaking suspicion that for some, it's just the usual MN American-bashing presented in a slightly less obnoxious manner than usual.

CarolinaintheMorning, there's no America-bashing from me; this country has it's own foibles and peccadillos aplenty. We do lots of things different from the US and other countries and I wouldn't suggest there's 'faux bafflement' on either 'side', it's just a nonsense term used to silence/put people down so I'm ignoring it.

What is annoying though is that the practice of tipping - which was for many of us- something of a reward for excellent service - is now an expected handover of cash for service staff doing what they're paid to do. I'm talking about the UK now, not the US. UK service is generally mediocre to good, it really doesn't hit high notes and we have minimum wage now that everybody gets paid.

It's clear to me now that the US system is different, it's transactional. Whether the service has been good, bad or indifferent - or even wanted - you are expected to pay between 20-25% or risk getting chased down the street. Fair enough, that's a transaction but in no way is it a 'tip'. Tips are not mandatory, certainly not in the UK and there are many people on minimum wage then being expected to tip service staff who are on minimum wage also. That is demonstrably unfair.

On balance I prefer the UK system in respect of tipping, it's clearer and fairer in my opinion. Tipping seems to be a hugely emotive subject for some people, it isn't for me.

Customer service is terrible in UK. Honestly, the American ex-pat boards are full of shocked titters and anecdotes about it. I'm mostly talking about shops, food kiosks, petrol stations, market stalls and all sorts of environments where even Americans don't tip.

British customer service is breathtakingly bad a lot of the time. Only New Yorkers (traditionally) come close to making brusque sarky or simply minimal effort service some kind of rite of passage the way I can easily find in many street markets, some pubs & shops in England.

Anyway, PP are talking mostly about $1-$5 here and there, not 20% of an already large bill. As for putting USA travel out of reach ... you don't reckon that £300+ per person for a oneway airplane ticket does that??

No America bashing from me either. I have holidayed there 4 times, in different parts each time, and loved it. I knew about the reasons service staff expect large tips, and know what their expectations are.

However, I find the service from waiting staff overly attentive and prefer to eat my meal in peace without constant interruptions.

I can't remember receiving bad service in the UK, and I think that perhaps the US expats here are so used to the in your face service they get at home that our levels of service seem wanting in comparison.

When my American family visit, their main issue with service is the speed. I took mine to a traditional Italian place and it took 20 mins for our food to come (I think of this as totally normal) and my relatives were very unhappy. I was like they do have to cook it! I think they expected the pasta and pizza to be all pre cooked and were a bit surprised to see dough being rolled out..

Conversely I really dislike it when servers in the US slap down the bill when you haven't even picked up your cutlery to eat your main course.

Basically I think it's just different cultural expectations

Conversely I really dislike it when servers in the US slap down the bill when you haven't even picked up your cutlery to eat your main course.

I used to feel the same, but now I see it as a good thing. You never have to wait for the bill!

I'm currently in the US, into week 2 with another week to go.

Started in Vegas then San Diego and on to LA where I stayed for a couple of nights before embarking on a cruise to Vancouver where I'll spend 3 nights before flying home.

Currently in San Francisco but heading to Astoria in a couple of hours. The cruise is very good value and includes everything including tips for the crew.

We didn't see any bellhops or doormen at any of the hotels we stayed at.

One thing to be aware of if you see a service charge just draw a line through the tip section or you're tipping twice.