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Original poster

I lied to school about children sickness and went on holiday

407 replies

kgabe · 31/10/2022 11:43

So before anyone decides to go hard on me, I have never ever lied about kids sickness before. I don't know why I did it this time, I guess money is tight, we worked hard to be able to afford the holiday, but still could not afford the holiday in half term, so we decided to take kids out of school for 3 days. I reported my children to have sickness. And off we went.
But unsure why, probably based on their hunch, school called me the next day. I did not answer, just sent them a message instead. But they replied they got an international ringing tone....ooops... i did not even reply to that. When we got back I got a letter suggesting I lied, that kids were on holiday instead of home poorly, etc. I don't know what to do, I hate lying and I regret not telling the truth, but has it gone too far now to just admit I lied? I can also expect the fine for my children, well tough I suppose. But I feel like a criminal, like I did something unspeakable. But I only allowed for my family to have a wonderful time together, we has such a great time, it is really priceless. My kids are both doing great academically and their abscence was above 95%. What is everyone's take on it? Should I own up now? Or deny it still.... And are they allowed to question my children without my permission about it?
Thank you

OP posts:
gandalf456 · 31/10/2022 11:46

What did the letter say? Sounds a bit ott to me

Hoppinggreen · 31/10/2022 11:46

I am not always against term time holidays in some circumstances but you take the chance of getting a fine and just pay it if you get one.
You have behaved very badly and given your children a very bad example

gandalf456 · 31/10/2022 11:47

Are they at primary or secondary?

Readmorebooks · 31/10/2022 11:48

Schools aren't stupid. 3 children in the same family all "sick" at the same time just before/after a half term holiday - of course they are going to know.
It would have been much better to just admit that you were taking them on holiday - of course it would have been unauthorised but schools know that people are going to do this to make it affordable. By lying you just look a bit daft (plus, unless your children are all in secondary school, they are bound to slip up and say something about their holiday).
Of course they can ask your children "without your permission" - they can ask your children anything.

girlmom21 · 31/10/2022 11:51

Tell them you were away with work and they were home with their dad. You've already lied so may as well commit to it.

Overthebow · 31/10/2022 11:52

Yeh you should have just admitted it before you went and taken the risk of getting a fine. Instead you lied and that really isn’t good.

tealandteal · 31/10/2022 11:54

Children are not very good at keeping secrets usually. They won’t “question” your children but if they say, how are you/are you feeling better etc one of them in bound to slip up or be overheard telling their friends.

Itstheway · 31/10/2022 11:54

Just say you were away with work, it’s not the end of the world to take your kids out for 3 days as complete one off

JustMaggie · 31/10/2022 11:54

I have never heard of an "international ringing tone". I think they're bluffing and I wouldn't admit to it if it were me.

CoorieIn · 31/10/2022 11:56

They'll ask your children so unless you expect them to lie come clean.

Thought fines were only for full weeks? That said we don't get fined where I live so it's only from a distant memory of a thread on here that I think that.

runninglikewater · 31/10/2022 11:56

JustMaggie · 31/10/2022 11:54

I have never heard of an "international ringing tone". I think they're bluffing and I wouldn't admit to it if it were me.

You can tell when you are calling someone abroad, it's a different ringtone.

badassbaby · 31/10/2022 11:56

JustMaggie · 31/10/2022 11:54

I have never heard of an "international ringing tone". I think they're bluffing and I wouldn't admit to it if it were me.

Nope...phone rings are longer in duration when you're abroad x

QforCucumber · 31/10/2022 11:56

You don't get a fine for 3 days of absence anyway so it's all been blown up and worry over nothing. The fines are applicable after 10 consecutive registrations missed (5 full days)

CoorieIn · 31/10/2022 11:57

Justmaggie

It is a thing it goes beep beep rather than the ring ring we're used to hearing.

maranella · 31/10/2022 11:58

International ring tone is absolutely a thing. UK phones tend to go 'ring ring, ring ring', whereas international one goes 'riiiiiing, riiiiiing'.

You got caught out OP. I'd own up if I were you and apologise. Trying to front it out and claim you weren't away when you clearly were will just ruin your relationship with the school and I doubt you want that. And don't lie in future.

OrangePumpkinLobelia · 31/10/2022 11:58

I'd put my hands up and admit it. Doubling down on a lie makes it worse IMO.

BigSandyBalls2015 · 31/10/2022 11:59

Ignore them, I wouldn't admit to it, say you were away with work and they were home with dad/grandparents/childminder. Ridiculous amount of time spent on chasing this sort of thing up. It's your choice and if you can't afford a holiday in school hols then this is what you have to do. School isn't the only place that kids learn. I took mine out quite a lot in primary school.

Katapolts · 31/10/2022 12:00

Of course they can question your children.

They can't really prove you lied though, so I'd probably not respond to the letter at all, or just say 'as I told you, they were off school due to sickness on the x/y/z of October' and leave it at that.

They aren't the police, the school secretary isn't going to bust your door down and drag you out for an interrogation.

They probably can't even fine you if it was only a 3 day absence.

Next time, just tell the truth.

Original poster
kgabe · 31/10/2022 12:00

Thak you guys. I appreciate all comments. Of course thank you to the concerned many telling me off for lying. I feel bad enough so no need to make me feel even worse. I am a very good parent and like I said, never did it before, and defo won't be doing it again... But I feel a bit persecuted by the school, Gosh, it's like I committed some atrocious crime, I feel so guilty and anxious... hefty price to pay for a bit of happiness I got with my kids on holiday. Yet there is absolute tonnes of children, who parents cannot be even bothered to send to school, I bet they don't feel even half as crappy as I do.. By the way, my kids are in Reception and Y6. Primary.

OP posts:
RinklyRomaine · 31/10/2022 12:02

I have just done this with my eldest although for one day. Nine of us travelling saved us an absolute fortune. There was an inset the following day and it just made sense. I'm afraid after the home schooling covid debacle, where I saw how little work they actually do, I have less patience with endless presenteeism, and felt the trip was more beneficial than a days films and mucking about which they usually do on the last day. I haven't been questioned because they didn't call, but in your shoes I think I would say no, you must be mistaken, and not elaborate. And then ignore it. If you get a fine, pay it and say no more.

MrsR87 · 31/10/2022 12:05

JustMaggie · 31/10/2022 11:54

I have never heard of an "international ringing tone". I think they're bluffing and I wouldn't admit to it if it were me.

It’s very different and noticeable.

UnaOfStormhold · 31/10/2022 12:05

How would you want your children to react when caught out in a lie? Because children are far more likely to do what they see you do, rather than what you say.

OrangePumpkinLobelia · 31/10/2022 12:06

kgabe · 31/10/2022 12:00

Thak you guys. I appreciate all comments. Of course thank you to the concerned many telling me off for lying. I feel bad enough so no need to make me feel even worse. I am a very good parent and like I said, never did it before, and defo won't be doing it again... But I feel a bit persecuted by the school, Gosh, it's like I committed some atrocious crime, I feel so guilty and anxious... hefty price to pay for a bit of happiness I got with my kids on holiday. Yet there is absolute tonnes of children, who parents cannot be even bothered to send to school, I bet they don't feel even half as crappy as I do.. By the way, my kids are in Reception and Y6. Primary.

I am sympathetic which is why I suggested own up to it. Its a one off and you are regretful. Hopefully that makes it better. It's the repeat offenders who deny deny deny who would piss the school off, I assume.

Holiday prices are crazy.

BagOfBollocks · 31/10/2022 12:06

kgabe · 31/10/2022 12:00

Thak you guys. I appreciate all comments. Of course thank you to the concerned many telling me off for lying. I feel bad enough so no need to make me feel even worse. I am a very good parent and like I said, never did it before, and defo won't be doing it again... But I feel a bit persecuted by the school, Gosh, it's like I committed some atrocious crime, I feel so guilty and anxious... hefty price to pay for a bit of happiness I got with my kids on holiday. Yet there is absolute tonnes of children, who parents cannot be even bothered to send to school, I bet they don't feel even half as crappy as I do.. By the way, my kids are in Reception and Y6. Primary.

Oh stop making excuses.

You lied, you got caught out. It doesn't matter what other parents do or don't do - just own it!

Lesson learned. Next time save up longer for your holiday or choose a cheaper one so you can go during half term.

Can't see you being fined over 3 days though as it doesn't work like that.

autienotnaughty · 31/10/2022 12:07

You don't have to "admit " anything. I'd email head and say I've received this letter, what happens next. And leave it there. If you get a fine then yes pay it. Personally I'd have gone with sickness bug, 48 hours off school. And ring every day to tell them.

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