Fledglings 2026 - support, discussion and looking after each other

[ComingInByAnsible]

A thread for parents of Year 13 leavers as they go on to universities, apprenticeships and other new adventures.

DS is off to Warwick to study PPE.

in my DC's experience, the student lettings now start on July 1st (and go through to 30 June) so they pay for 52 weeks. If they have a good landlord, they make make the tenancy start one or two weeks later after cleaning etc. The other thing to note about giving notice is that most student houses are joint tenancies which means if one student gives notice then it ends everyone's tenancy. Unlikely to be a popular move if that student is doing so because they wish to leave early.

But the new laws allow 2months notice so in theory the whole house can just give notice before the summer. My older one never had a 50 week contract was usually Sept to June?
Notice periods: Tenants can leave at any time by giving two months' notice, while landlords must follow strict statutory notice periods and conditions for Section 8 claims. 1, 2]

In Scotland students who don’t want to pay rent over the summer look for flats during the summer, but many of the best flats go as soon as the previous students move out in June. So it is a matter of deciding whether you want to risk trying to find a flat later.

The other thing to note about giving notice is that most student houses are joint tenancies which means if one student gives notice then it ends everyone's tenancy. Unlikely to be a popular move if that student is doing so because they wish to leave early.

until a recent law change the opposite of this was true in Scotland - you couldn’t end a lease unless ALL tenants gave notice. Which meant you were all trapped if one of wanted to stay or if one disappeared without giving formal notice. Now one party of a joint tenancy can give notice to the others that they wish to end a tenancy.

Yes same here, Week 2 went quicker and much less fraught but I had the odd blip for the following week as well.

Son has settled well and socialising with house mates and enjoying his course. We get a phone call at week-ends usually. He has a girlfriend already. Freshers flu came and went quickly. He seemed fine - just a cold. But that stopped me booking something to go away for a few days as I suddenly didn't want to go away in case he needed to come home. I desperately wanted to get away for a few days but it didn't happen as work got busier for us which was a good distraction. Sort of got over that feeling now but maybe November would be good for a couple of nights away somewhere.

Similar to others - not enough washing for the washing machine - I think we need more underwear so we can wait longer for a full load! I know we can do small loads but I like to do a big one so I only have to use the tumble dryer once! Our dryer has a mind of its own and only likes big loads.

Still need new hobbies. So far mine is going out to a different supermarket and getting meals for two, rather than a home delivery. Not very exciting but we can go to a cafe when out shopping. Weather has stopped any other interests I was planning on doing more of (days out etc). So still need to find a new routine.

With the clocks changing tonight it will all change again. Always throws me - so we'll need something for dark evenings now. I'm not a big tv watcher and OH doesn't like doing jigsaws! I'm sure we'll find something.

Oh and sounds like most of the cooking equipment wasn't needed - no cooking going on as far as I can tell!

Forgot to add - week 2 while I was still all over the place, cleared out some cupboards, sorted out all the dvd's we haven't watched for donkeys years - and then put them all back again ha ha. Just in case we want to watch them. But we haven't had a dvd player for years so then bought a dvd player and had that delivered so we could watch the dvd's - then decided I didn't want to go "back" and do past things again that reminded me of childhood and family times so sent the dvd player back again. Yes I was scatty that week.

Hi just popping on to ask a question about changing their child’s address, as I’m a single parent and dd has now started university and is living in halls I want to get the single person discount on my council tax.

I’ve filled out a form on line where the only options are has someone died or moved out. I was hoping for the option that dd is now in full time education tbh as although she has moved out I still consider this her home iyswim.

I’ve now had a voting letter come through asking about who lives here for voting purposes and I’m also wondering if dd is meant to do things like update her driving licence? It seems a bit pointless as it’s more like she has a second address at uni rather than that being her permanent residence iyswim?

Wondered if anyone else has thought about this?

I'm not sure on this but I think most students keep their home address as their registered address, which is needed for voting and electoral register as well. They can't really register halls or university accommodation as a full time address I think - they would miss voting cards etc (even if infrequent!) but I guess they could opt for a postal vote?

Could be worth contacting the council and asking or looking on their web page as they may have info about situations like this.

If you/she do decide to make her university address her main one then it would mean changing everything to that address, including bank, driving licence, car tax , insurance details etc, and possibly even informing the ins co the car is left away from the home address.

I'm not sure you can do a bit of one and a bit of the other. Sounds tricky. She'd also have to change her address for all of those every time she moved to different accommodation maybe annually? I think it;s easier for students if they have their home address as their main address but can fully understand wanting the council tax reduction.

If your child is a full-time uni student living away, they are not counted (for council tax puposes) as living at your house, even if it stays as their permanent address. I think their course has to be minimum of 24 weeks or something so do check the details.

DS has been totally taken by surprise that people are already in groups and house hunting. They've not been there a month. For various reasons, he doesn't 'belong' to any groups yet although he knows people. It seems that everyone has already decided who they are sharing with and he has no-one. We've told him to ask about but it's still a 'no'. Because I don't know the city, I don't know how much of a problem this is (or whether he will easily get a place if he gets a group later on). It is really stressing him out.

Has anyone any advice on how the waifs and strays sort themselves out?

In DD's uni city there is accommodation still available in September, so we've no experience of this.

Where is he?

Most places will run flatmate finding events over the next few months.

My son is in a similar position (I think) but he hasn't noticed yet!! I am going to talk to him about it next week when he has a lighter timetable.

Students are allowed to register to vote at their term time address and their home address which makes things easier.

If there are private student halls then it’s worth just having a look at them. They will have rooms in shared flats like any other halls up until the last minute pretty much so he won’t have to commit yet and he may well find others to share a house with before the summer or who might want to get a room in the private halls too.

Thanks for the suggestions. I had no idea that there might be events to help to find flatmates (although I don't know whether he'll have the nerve to actually go to one - he had a bit of trouble with going to freshers events).

It's also useful to know about the private halls. I need to scope out the local situation to see what is available. I'll also look to see if there are studios available, although I think it would be better for him to have flatmates if possible.

The uni is Swansea, BTW.

@MumMumMumMumMumMumMumMum - the student union website at my DS's university has a very active flatmate-finding page, and the university's sub-reddit also often has posts looking for housemates - maybe worth checking if Swansea has similar? At this time of year it's mostly people looking for replacement tenants and swaps, but a few people are starting to look ahead to next year.

First-years tend to get in a terrible flap about this really early in the year at a lot of universities, I wouldn't worry too much! Would also second the suggestion of checking out private halls, they can have a lot of advantages in terms of facilities, inclusive bills, privacy and security.

My daughter has been sobbing tonight . Made a good friend who she had a lot in common with and we’re gong to live together next year and shes decided to drop out of uni as she doesn’t like her course. Mine totally understands as she used to be in the same course but changed.
its really deflated her .
The big pro is that she’s enjoying her new course , the cons seem to be everything else .
Theres a course trio her course leader encouraged her to put her name down for open to all three years but only 25 spaces have been filled across the board. She will have to share rooms with 4 others she doesn’t know and it’s making her anxious . Add to the fact that it’s during Reading week where she was going to go visit her best friend and she has an assignment to hand on after which she doesn’t know when she’s gong to get to do it .
was heartbreaking to hear her sob tonight over everything. She’s had her struggles but I haavnt heard her cry since she’s been there other than a little wobble when we said goodbye when we dropped her off on the 12th September.

@Rockykeen Sorry, it's so hard to see them upset, isn't it? It's a very full-on time, but if the course is right for your DD I would expect other things to fall into place gradually.

Has the weed-smoking flatmate been brought to heel?

No he’s still there and that’s helped ruin the vibe as they went from a flat that kept their doors open to closed . One of her room mates is lovely though.
ibthink it’s just been a lot since she got her a level results. Deciding to change course , moving away , the experience in her flat not being what it was at the start after the ‘weed ‘ guy moved in . Making friends on her course , realizing three weeks in it wasn’t for her , changing so late and having a lot of work to catch up with due to the nature of her new course . Now her friend . She’s also been visiting her boyfriend and friends at weekends and theyre fully settled.
I encourages her to go out to a society yesterday but she was deflated after her friends news . I’m sure there are others who are struggling like her . She’s a very calm girl who loves going out but isn’t a big drinker .
i think k the fact that she loves the course she’s doing now is definitely what’s keeping her going otherwise she’d not have much to stay for .
I have given her the option of attending an upen day where her friends are in case she’d like to move next September, but she says she’d like to carry on trying to make it work out because she lives both the course and city . She just needs to find others like her . I’ve suggested something like table top gaming societiy.

Its horrible when they struggle. My DD isn't doing great but doing ok for her I think.
Re accomodation mine has not made any friends she would even consider sharing with (very fussy/ND) and we will definitely be looking at private halls. She's in London so no shortage of accomodation.

Mine will be looking at private halls too.

DS GF he met at uni chose to stay in uni halls for her 2nd year last year as it suited her better as she’s ND. And this year DS and some friends chose private student halls as did his GF. I think private student halls are a good call. DS was in a house share last year and some friends were in private halls for various reasons. It allows flexibility and you get to meet new people. They’ve met nice students sharing their flat this year.

Thanks @ChildrenOfAlbionRovers - that is really helpful. Anything I can do to help DS help himself is an advantage. I hope his uni have something like this set up.

Sorry to hear your DD is struggling @RockyKeen. It sounds like the place is right for your DD even so.

My instinct is to try to fix things but I have to leave them to it. (That said, a lot of fixing things goes on in the background.)

DS and his GF met most of their friends through societies and each other, whereas DD has met friends through halls (not sure re societies but she has joined a few and goes weekly and is enjoying them)