Fledglings 2026 - support, discussion and looking after each other

[ComingInByAnsible]

A thread for parents of Year 13 leavers as they go on to universities, apprenticeships and other new adventures.

DS is off to Warwick to study PPE.

It is quite bittersweet when you have one taking off on their journey as I do tomorrow and an older one who has disabilities which mean they can’t as another poster said. I think my elder ds is very aware of being left behind, particularly as he has only recently properly acknowledged having asd/adhd with accompanying learning disabilities. He has always only wanted to be “normal”.
Am so happy for my son heading off, he has worked hard and surpassed all expectations and is so excited about his next steps. But yes I do so wish my older son could have the same in front of him.

We have survived Ikea and Tesco and a long traffic jam. Feeling like we achieved quite a bit and should be able to do the rest tomorrow. Just have to navigate central Edinburgh and find somewhere to unload the car.

Thoughts with those with other DC who won’t get this experience. Sad as I am that DD is moving away, I am so grateful that she can.

Hope all of the drop-offs this weekend go smoothly!

Loving reading about YP already off or setting off on their new adventures, but big hugs to parents and siblings left behind. Having an older sibling unable to go must be really hard, @Rumplestiltz and @CatkinToadflax. Hope both your younger DSs have a great start to uni.

@ArchitectureMum, enjoy Edinburgh! Sounds like you are making great progress, hope the rest of moving in goes well today. No way could I listen to leaving on a jet plane and slipping through my fingers though, I am tearing up just reading about it!

@CountryShepherd, sounds like a great start for your DD! And fantastic that she is keeping in touch so much, this gives me hope (although I’m not holding my breath)!

We still have two weeks to go before we take DS to Warwick. Things have been very busy at work which has been a helpful distraction but also means we still have most of the practical stuff to sort now that DS finished his job. Many of his friends leave for uni this weekend so there have been quite a few last meet ups and goodbyes.

@Justonemorecoffeeplease, @postitnot, @Bremstone, DS also has a younger sibling (DD16) who will miss him a lot. They are very close and sometimes when she gets in a strop DS is the only one she’ll listen to (other times he’s the cause of the strop!).

@ChildrenOfAlbionRovers, hope your DS has a great start to uni despite his fears and reservations. I am sure once he starts making friends and getting into the welcome activities he’ll start to see the positives. Where is he going?

@MiniMidiMaxi, @Countrylife2002, @rhabarbarmarmelade, @wonderstuff, hope your DC are settling in well, and hope you are feeling ok too and can do something nice this weekend.

@HighburyHope, I hope the freshers’ flu hasn’t been too bad and your DD has fully recovered. Loving her updates quotes!

Hope the remaining packing went well, and good luck with the drive today, @bibliomania!

@Tebheag, hope the PT job is going well and that an apprenticeship comes through soon. Great that he’s helping around the house.

@hels71, sorry to read that you are having to take everything by train, especially after your surgery. Is there no way to post some of the stuff or maybe take minimum amount of stuff and take the rest when your DH can drive?

@Rumplestiltz that was me with the older disabled DS. Sorry to hear you have the same challenges in your family. It’s so difficult isn’t it.

@ComingInByAnsible thank you, and the same to you for your DS in two weeks’ time.

We've dropped DS off and he seems ok. We’re taking him out to lunch tomorrow at the ‘posh Spoons’ near his accommodation. Of course Exeter would have a posh Spoons! 😄

Good luck to all x

Still a couple of weeks to go here. Son, who seemed raring to go and be Independent and need no one, suddenly said he thinks he might be coming home a lot. Nerves kicking in maybe.

Just left DD1 at Bristol. I am excited for her. I am going to miss her and so will DD2 and DH.

@CatkinToadflax that’s funny - have dropped mine at Exeter today too! Perhaps their paths will cross, he is also not far from the posh spoons 😀
all the best to everyone on their journeys

@Rumplestiltz that’s certainly a coincidence! Hope they both settle in quickly!

I have left her to it after a long day of shopping and room arranging. She was fine, me less so but she will have a great time I am sure. What a beautiful city. We broke a mirror whilst rearranging furniture. Hopefully not a sign of bad luck. No drawing pins to be found in Edinburgh so get them when you see them is my advice. The kitchen and common room seem nice. I did have a bit of a moment walking in as the building and corridors are a bit grim but I got over it. Not enough storage but I guess that is always the case and she will find a way.

Enjoy the Imperial @CatkinToadflax it gets voted best Wetherspoons on the country regularly.

Just home after a 500 miles round trip to Exeter.

lots of tears (mostly mine) but she’s since text to say she’s met some flatmates and they seem [quote] “normal”

Just catching up and so many drop-offs this weekend! Hope they all settle well.

We had a lovely catch-up with DD on the phone this evening. Her latest insight into student life is “people will steal anything!”. Turned out she had washed the kitchen bin from their flat and put it out in the sun to dry off. Next thing it had gone! So she has bought a new one and all is well, though apparently they have an ant problem possibly linked to the formerly grotty bin. Frankly I think the whole flat was fairly grotty when they arrived.

Anyway. She is over her freshers’ flu (thanks for asking, @ComingInByAnsible) and is working on her first assessed task which is a presentation this coming week on the effectiveness of separation of powers in Western democracies. She was pleased to nab that topic, which builds nicely on some of the content in her Politics A level. The downside is that hers is the very first presentation of the whole cohort, and counts towards her final grade and ranking! So it’s her first quiet and studious weekend, but overall she seems happy and settled which is great to hear. Best of luck to all your Fledglings, especially the newly-fledged. Can’t wait to hear how they get on.

So after a very long journey with lots of traffic disruption we are in Southampton. He is dropped off- partly unpacked room seems nice, kitchen bright and airy. Pub supper has been eaten. Will take him for a starter food shop in the morning then off home.

The lots of nights out saying bye to various friend groupings has rather caught up with him. Hadn’t read some of the info relevant to arrival arrangements but nothing too dramatic luckily.

Great thread. 🙂

Please can you also tell your DCs to be mindful that there is often an issue with drink spiking in places where students congregate? I teach at a university and always give this reminder to incoming students because so many (including one male student) have come to say they think/know their drink was spiked.

I know it isn't just a student problem but when they hang out in the place frequented by lots of students or even in the SU bar (where an alarming number of these cases arise on our campus) they might imagine the space is safer than it is in reality.

And of course they won't be with friends who've known them for years and are used to looking out for one another.

🙁

A timely warning thank you @ShallWeDance which campus where the SU is problematic?!

we’ve dropped DD off at Bristol, she was happy as Larry. I kept it together until we had dropped her off and had a good cry afterwards. Now need to let go a bit more. It’s been really hard for me

I'm going to be the same, I know. I was bad enough when eldest ds went off!

Slight drama here as. after repeated questioning, ds2 was adamant he's due to move in on Saturday, but it turns out he's moving in on Friday instead. Which not only means things have become a bit rushed (we only got back off holiday a few days ago), but also a really tedious car trip home in Friday rush hour traffic afterwards.. Not looking forward to any of it tbh!

Sorry I cannot say which one because it would be outing. I think it is probably more than one (predatorsincluding other students will take advantage, especially if it is somewhere you let down your guard because you are on campus or in a student dominated environment). It gives a false sense of securityI work for a university that prides itself on doing exceptionally well when it comes to student safety.

Sorry--no idea how the strike through appeared.

Some are already dropping theirs off! Mine go off this week and my tears have already started! Leaving them to fend for themselves, can't bear it!

A friend came to our rescue and gave us a lift! So no train, but a day late. She is now dropped off and has unpacked . I'm trying to hold it together. She's my only one and the house is so quiet!!!

Glad you got a lift @hels71 mine is an only too so I get you, but at least he is staying local so we will see him regularly.

Dropped DC1 yesterday; I am missing them and the house does feel a bit quiet. Thankfully we still got DC2 for another few years but I think they are also missing their sibling. It is going to take time to get used to.

Wow! So.many moving in over the weekend. Still a week to go here!

I think packing will be a last minute affair but he is only 1hr 30mins away so if anything is forgotten he can come back and get it.