Son not allowed to continue to second year at uni

[PocketSand]

DS2 has just completed his first year in an engineering degree. His results are all over the place from 1st in maths to 2:2 to required resits. He exceeded the A level grade requirements for MEng. He is autistic and has ADHD. He was un medicated prior to and during most of his first year due to shortages followed by referral to cardiology.

His DSA support didn't start til the spring term and one support worker provided 1 hour support when 30 hours was approved. He constantly tells the one he has seen that everything is fine and they believe him.

He always says everything is fine and doesn't ask for help. He has never been to the library and relies totally on lecture notes. He doesn't know what independent study is. I have always been his advocate but now he is expected to advocate for himself. No one at the uni knows these issues - he has not even contacted his personal tutor let alone disability services and just thinks he needs to work harder.

He found out today that he has failed his third submission of a lab report he initially submitted in February. He did not have DSA agreed support at that time so he didn’t have his own laptop. He borrowed another student’s at the time but when he had to resubmit no longer had access to his results and so he tried to cobble together a report using specimen (and maybe someone else’s results - not clear). He had previously received an email saying he couldn’t proceed unless he passed resubmission. I assume that’s where we are at now.

His feedback is harsh - shouldn’t study for a degree if not prepared to use feedback to improve his work. Trouble is he often doesn’t understand the feedback and he is unwilling to ask for clarification as he fears tutor’s anger. He says he doesn’t know who marked the work so doesn’t know who to talk to and seems generally clueless about most administrative issues.

I feel completely in the dark and don’t know where to go from here. Obviously I don’t want to just give up and accept his journey ends here as it seems very unfair but don’t know what I can do to try and enable him to fix this or if it can be fixed.

Can anyone who knows the system provide advice on next steps please?

I'm with others in that you need to find out what he wants to do.

The university support is there, but as pp have said, the staff aren't mind readers and they can't force (adult) students to engage with what is on offer. I'm an academic and I've seen students slip between the cracks like this, and that's when I knew they had additional needs. I can email a student every bloody day, but if they're not coming to lectures or seminars and not replying to emails and not engaging with the support I signpost them to, there's not a lot more I can do... I think parents have an incorrect idea of how university academic staff work. We're not school teachers. We don't see the same students every day and in many subjects you rarely see the whole cohort on a degree together at the same time (due to options). We only know if someone has SEN if either the DSA dept tells us (because the student has registered) or the student tells us themselves (and then to get any accommodation for it, they need to register with DSA).

In any case, it's usual that if you fail your first year you are given an opportunity to resit it (either with or without attendance. I expect in his case it would be with attendance). But that's only worth it if he wants to and if he's going to engage with the support available. It sounds like you need to help him get that support in place, but once you've done that, he's the one who needs to engage with it.

For God's sake, don't be so arrogant and bloody harsh on her. He has genuine needs and needs support..Stop telling her it's her fault he failed. You're not exactly an example of successful growth and learning with an attitude like that, are you, so probably better to keep quiet..He got a first in maths. It's an organisational issue..

@LBOCS2

"in my experience pressure is usually good for ADHDers"

Can I just ask what is your experience, exactly?

Ime pressure leads to overwhelm, perhaps we're of different mindsets?

Indecent study? Oo errr

@ChangingSockshe says he doesn’t know who his personal tutor is. Unfortunately this is believable. I am trying to find out so I can contact them.

@Extraenergyneeded I hope there is already sufficient information from EHCP and medical reports for autism and ADHD to appeal. GP can’t add anything.

@StarlitPurple25DSA support has been shocking. DS2 can’t have failed to engage with support that was not provided.

@Sassybookloverall my son’s needs were made clear from the start. He masks because he does not want to be seen to need support. Not asking for help has been on his EHCP since primary. Before uni I could advocate for him to make sure he got support without having to advocate for himself and request it. You are right he needs to understand that I need to be involved going forward but so do the uni. I hope he will be able to authorise my continued involvement because the alternative is failing his degree.

@SausageRoll2020understanding feedback and initiating contact to request support and guidance are difficult because of communication disorder and have always been issues highlighted on his EHCP since primary. I suspect he will always struggle with social communication due to being autistic. However he also has strengths such as high ability in maths which are not universally found. I suspect that his degree choice requires skills he struggles with and he’d be far better studying a purely academic subject.

@StarlitPurple25 atm he has been told he can’t continue to the second year not that he has to resit the first year. He has failed one lab report but passed all other assessments for the year.

@Thaawtsomhe is registered with disability support. I have asked that he gives consent for them to communicate with me.

Why didn’t he have his own laptop? If he is only relying on lecture notes sounds like he hasn’t understood what is needed. I think you need to speak to the disability service people and see what is possible at this point.

Realistically, he isn’t being given the choice to continue with engineering. Regardless of failings with the very considerable support he needs, they clearly have concerns about his suitability for the course. He has failed to meet the minimum standard necessary to continue. Yet he did fabulously in Maths. He really ought to reflect on this, which will hopefully lead to the conclusion that he needs to play to his strengths and get a first class degree, rather than struggling with engineering.

If he didn’t understand the feedback, why not attend the module organiser’s drop-in hours or if he was scared, just email the module organiser? I am certain the MO would have told them how to get in touch with Qs at the beginning of the year and likely repeatedly throughout the semester. And he’s an adult and this isn’t school - why would he fear their wrath so much that he can’t approach them?

He would have had access to results - they’re usually on blackboard (or similar) and you can view them on any laptop/device

You need to go to the uni and talk to them.and get help from the disability support team. Some unis are notiri bad at this and shouldnt be let off the hook. He needs strong strategies in place to help him manage his work.

Notoriously bad

There are different considerations here, universities do not provide 1:1 teaching and I’ve never heard of more than a handful of support hours a week for academic reasons (students with lots of support hours are for washing, dressing, perhaps a sign language interpreter not teaching per se) but some universities are better set up for students who are better suited to class style teaching than lecturing eg Aston had a good reputation for this.

my dd is autistic with several other things and dsa funded 1 hour of 1:1 support per week plus a one of £500 for a laptop

Exactly.

No not exactly.

I used the phrase ‘in my experience’, as it relates to my own experience as someone with ADHD and with a number of friends, colleagues and family members who also have it. I do mention my own diagnosis in the next sentence.

It’s acknowledged that pressure can in a lot of cases create the urgency needed for people with ADHD to start on projects or pieces of work that are otherwise very difficult to get going with as they are not rewarding in terms of dopamine. An example of this issue is described here but feel free to utilise google to carry out your own research.

I work as a DSA mentor. The first year at uni can be a very difficult transition for some students because of the need to advocate for themselves. The DSA set up for mentor and study skills support is that the student needs to actively engage, which is difficult for some students.

As a mentor, I am limited as to how many times I can reach out to a student to try to arrange a support session, if the student is not engaging. We have a set schedule of reminders we can send prior to support sessions.

The support is supposed to be limited to the sessions.

This makes it difficult for students who need more support than this.

Many of the students I work with thrive, but for some, even the task of arranging the session with their mentor is overwhelming.

DSA also discourages parents from being able to liaise on behalf of students. I've only had this approved in one case.

It's not uncommon for students to be awarded two hours a week and only end up agreeing to one hour a fortnight because they find it overwhelming.

If he doesn’t know what independent study is, after a year at uni, is this really the right path for him? OP is clearly out of their depth in terms of understanding and supporting university level study.

There's probably a spectrum of pressure, with everyone at a different point. I have ADHD and can focus in a useful way with a reasonable amount of pressure, but if it becomes too much I literally freeze, brain scrambles and I can't function at all. So it' s very much subjective..

@LBOCS2

singing from the same hymnsheet, just a different page 😊

I'm sorry I don't think that's fair at all.
My son graduated top of his year in physics this summer without even owning a laptop. Not all students can afford one, yes it is nice to have but by no means essential!

Explain very clearly to him that the current situation is down to him not asking for and using the support provided for him. That is why he needs to get over not asking for help.

OP we have been in a similar situation with DD. Adhd, auditory processing, anxiety then depression. Couldn't engage with the minimal support offered, tutors were never aware of her additional needs. It resulted in her absolutely hysterical in January if her 2nd year. Something else happened at uni which resulted in her coming home and we restarted at a uni closer to home, on a different course.

The level of support she has received is amazing. She has passed her 1st yr with a high 2.1, is happy and thriving.

If he has to stay at that uni, I would seriously consider him changing course. The support may be much better in a different department. He also needs a laptop, and a decent one at that. Also, dd has a physical condition and DSS for students have provided her with an amazing amount of kit. And ergonomic office chair, special supports for her bed, a laptop table to work from bed if she needs to and a high powered laptop pre-loaded with various software to help her dyslexicia and processing disorder. As well as a personal support person that she meets once a week online for an hour each time to help her break down her assessments and prioritise her workload so she doesn't get overwhelmed.

Uni is about independent study, but there are ways that ND people can be supported so they can independently study.

I would appeal because you might need proof for student finance that it is disability that has caused him to need an extra year of funding. They get 4 years anyway and can also go beyond that in extenuating circumstances which your boy has.

But it sounds like you will need to advocate for him and need his permission to do that so I would get that, then speak to his head of department and personal tutor and see what they say.

University isn't primary school. It is up to the student to figure things out and make it work for them as individuals. You can't expect university teaching staff to hand hold for your adult son through his degree

What’s he actually been told OP? I did an engineering degree and at the of each year there would be a number told they couldn’t continue. They weren’t just slung out, they would be transferred to a course more suited to their ability, so from MEng to BEng, or from BEng to an associated BSc. Has he been placed on an alternative course, or asked to leave?

I sympathise with you as a parent wanting the best for your son. However, he doesn't sound suited to academic life at university. He has no concept of independent study, hasn't engaged with support despite multiple attempts and even potentially gave in a paper with results he didn't obtain himself? Even with ADHD/Autism, anyone at university needs to have these basic skills. Support has to be reasonable and it sounds like the issue is he isn't cut out for university.