Is WIWIKAU overly sensitive?

[Ohmygoodness23]

I joined a Facebook group called What I wish I knew about university (WIWIKAU) about 4 months ago in readiness for my eldest going off to uni (he is now 8 weeks into his first year). Haven’t checked in for a while but did earlier this evening and discovered that I have been barred from the group!! I only replied to a few posts - one, offering advice about accommodation in Newcastle (which was well received); two, saying to a parent that it should be their DC’s decision not their’s about clearing unis and RG is not the be all and end all; and three - saying that it was premature and absurd for a fresher DC to drop out within a week coz they hadn’t made friends yet. I was very polite at all times. But I am banned from WIWIKAU now. No recourse or appeal mechanism.

This thread introduced me to WIWIKAU!

Oh my! Some of the parents are more hands on with their 'young people' than I am with my DS who is doing A Levels now. The poor YP need to be able to breathe and grow up!

Good for the mild entertainment value though.

Drugs at university, well I never.......

Tbh, we have had a very similar thread to this before and often wonder about motives of thread starter

It's easy to sneer but lots of parents have no experience of uni and WIWIKAU is useful. MN disproportionately has women on it who went to uni themselves.

There is a happy medium somewhere between the MN nasty brigade who dismiss any separation anxiety, support of lower/mid tier unis, generalised anxiety and the helicopters hovering on WIWIKAU. Suggest Lincoln on here and you'd get eaten alive, even if it is totally a good shout. Seriously, I know this from personal experience.

I think some of the removed posts on WIWIKAU are ridiculous (especially them preserving their 'brand') but I also think MN HE can be a bear pit. The only arguments that break out on WIWIKAU tend to ne a definition of a campus uni (FWIW , Lincoln is not a campus uni and it gets recommended then too!)

Haha! Nope.

I remember that.

I joined it, and the university parents groups too.

There are a lot of helicopter parents!

The one that got me recently (I think on the uni group), was a post full of horror that the university had visitor accommodation for visiting parents/those attending conferences. Separate buildings, not in the same block as students.

She was outraged that such accommodation existed because visitors wouldn’t be DBS/ back ground checked. She was saying this was putting students at risk and the university was failing in their duty of care to students by having adults (it seemed to pass her by that the students are adults too, and could indeed be mature students).

Wait til she finds out students aren't DBS checked

Thank you

It's easy to sneer but lots of parents have no experience of uni and WIWIKAU is useful. MN disproportionately has women on it who went to uni themselves.

There is a happy medium somewhere between the MN nasty brigade who dismiss any separation anxiety, support of lower/mid tier unis, generalised anxiety and the helicopters hovering on WIWIKAU.

I agree @Piggywaspushed

I didn’t ‘go’ to university so MN and wiwikau and the Ucas website have been invaluable. I’m very pleased I saw the packing list on wiwikau before being banned.
I probs ask daft questions too but I’d definitely not post a photo of DC - mine would go ballistic! I’m also on ‘parent of x uni’ but need to take care as I’d have hated my parents being involved in my life when I was 18. They wouldn’t have had a clue what I was doing, where or when.

Saw this one earlier and my first thought was that it was someone from a thread like this trying to make a point about how some parents are over involved!

The poster you’re all referring to is extremely knowledgeable professionally. I understand her tone might grate on people but she gives hours and hours of her time for free and provides accurate advice and information.

It’s a great shame that parents with no knowledge of HE and who only want the best for their children (don’t we all?) are forced to go to an unofficial Facebook group run by people with no professional experience to help their children navigate their future. You can thank the Tory cuts to impartial IAG for that. The admins of WIWIKAU have grown a great community who are trying their best to plug that gap. They were offered free and impartial advice for their members but declined.

Who were offered free and impartial advice? And who declined?

Yes! It’s the “we” bit! No, you are not applying to university, your son/daughter is. Give it a rest!

Yes, I agree. I wince when I see people who are clearly thinking that it's a mutual decision and the use of "We" does tend to imply that.

It's fine if the dc is asking for help in doing it, and it's fine to make suggestions but it should be when the dc asks rather than an assumption that the decision is made together.

"We think that..." "We are applying..." Cringe!

It's the same as "we are pregnant" isn't it? No, men can't get pregnant.

Yes I hate that too. No you're not you twats.

Yh what the heck is ‘we are pregnant’ about? Yes ‘we are having a baby’ but no you’re not both pregnant.

Anyone who thinks WIWI has been set up as a community service is kidding themselves! It's purely commercial, hence the blocking of any signposting as that might be "competition".

They are actively trying to force people onto their website by blocking posts on various topics eg internships (which would be very helpful info for all those helicopter parents with kids desperately searching for year in industry placements right now). I reposted my info on their website and pointed out that it was a shame it would now only be seen by 200 people instead of 50,000. My post was deleted and I'm now banned from both sites apparently!

Not a problem for me as both my kids happily ensconced in Uni and I was only there to try to help other parents.

If you are on there check your privacy permissions very carefully. The old saying is true - if something is free, YOU are the product!

I was banned from WIWIKAU for sharing details of a different uni parents support group. A member had asked a question specific to one uni’s accommodation block, so I shared the group specific to that uni (DD is there) as I thought the advice would be more useful and specific and the post less likely to get lost in the group. Apparently this is against the group rules. I have no idea why as surely the whole point is to help people 🤷🏻‍♀️.

@Wotrewelookinat I think the key point is that they claim it's a site to help parents but I think their behaviour makes it clear that they have a far more commercial agenda!

Yes, I've had posts removed because I've signposted to other Facebook groups which might have more accurate information. Their website is rubbish too, many forum topics have not had any activity for a year or two.