Oxford / Cambridge - current students support / chat thread

[DadDadDad]

Continuing a thread for anyone who wants to talk about their sons' and daughters' experience being a student in Oxford or Cambridge. (Or nephews, granddaughters, sisters, uncles - or if you or they have now graduated but you want to share your thoughts - all are welcome!)

I have a DS in his second year at Oxford, studying a small humanity in a tiny college.

Over to you...

@sandybayley, DD's dance squad were very excited to share the green room with Dick and Dom last night!

@ofteninaspin DH and me laughed a lot about the producer of Dick and Dom DJ-ing. Maybe Auntie Mabel will turn up next time 😂

Im here now at parents dinner.. In smart trousers and a beaded blouse/jacket. Smart dresses around me. But i think i fit in.

I will tell you all how it goes. Closest I'll get to enjoying what's on offer at C. What a beautiful place.

So sorry to hear about ill DC. My DD has also been uncharacteristically run down.

malbecfan and mutterphore thank you for your replies. It sounds like a smart dress will be fine which is a huge relief - I'm really not a cocktail dress person!

DS originally invited us to a parents' formal very early on but I was very nervous of meeting Oxford parents so we didn't go. This is our last chance before he graduates.

I do feel very honoured. I assume we will be expected to do our own thing after dinner though!

I hope the weekend at home helps Unescorted and that your ds feels much better soon Pantjog. Also that all the poorlies stop feeling poorly pronto. It's horrible when they are unwell and you are worried about them.

I was a bit of a sickly student - prone to spectacular temperatures and spent some time in sickbay or whatever it was called with the uni nurses frowning at my thermometer readings. Still, at least I got fed then which was handy as I was also rather poor without parental support.

We've eaten in college once - it was a parents only thing. I felt super awkward and realised that a bonus of gowns would be that they would combat the rather chilly air wafting around the hall.

@Sunndowne
I'm relieved to hear that you wore smart trousers.
I'm hoping to attend a formal at some point, and I don't do dresses.

Thanks for the well wishes. Homecooked food, super low rent TV and sofa giggles seem to be helping. It will be difficult for her to go back, but it is only for 3 weeks and she is running the Secret Santa for Oxmas. I feel bad for patching her up and sending her back out there.

Good to hear Unescorted.

Also sending get well wishes to the poorly ones.
Sent an extensive list of sleep hygiene tips to DD yesterday who is in a terrible unhealthy sleep cycle. I’m sure this is the case for many of them.
Rewarded at 7am by pictures of deserted streets! ( assuming she has actually been to bed….)

Spoke to DD for almost three hours yesterday and will be glad to have her home.

Unconvinced that Billy the Brand New Puppy will do much to aid clearly much needed sleep, but still.

So last night was lovely. It was a special parents' dinner for finalists.

Dress: I was quite dressy with my top and heels seemed to be the thing, glad I brought them. Lots of dresses but also a good number of smart trouser suits.

Have to enjoy at least once in their college for a special event.

Hope everyone feels better soon.

[quote SandyBayley]@lazyboysmum - DS1 is a 2nd year chemist. He's found it very challenging. Better this year though. DM me if you want to chat.[/quote]
Thank you so much, have DM'd you

@Sunndowne I'm going to PM you

@sunnedowne thank you. So if I can't find a suitable dress smart black trousers, heels and a glitzy top would blend be ok?

Interjecting just to say that would be fine. Men wore lounge suits and women cocktail-type dresses or dressy trouser ensembles.

When we had parents’ dinner at C I think most parents were smiling in a friendly (whoa! We’re here!) way at each other as we hung up our coats. We sat with some nice parents of a compatriot of ds - we got on well. (At graduation, however, we sat with a very pompous pair. )

It‘s lovey to hear everybody’s updates, although I hope those still ill will recover very soon. I’m relishing in the normality of the chat (no more bubbles and isolation, thankfully). Hopefully last year’s dystopia feels very distant to them, although I do wonder whether some of the problems with long-standing lurghy, overwork and finding tribes are a hangover of the whole sorry episode.

I have a DS in his second year at O. He’s ostensibly there to study a science subject, although it seems he’s spending most of his time playing sport, doing admin related to various leadership positions and ‘socialising’. Thanks to pre-season training he didn’t have much difficulty finding his tribe last year and he’s very settled and happy.

We’re just back from an overnight visit and it was lovey to see him although rather frustrating that his match was cancelled (opposition pulled out). DD1 came as a surprise and I was relieved that he was pleased to see her (even a year ago, he probably would have thought it would be embarrassing having a younger sister hanging around). If anyone is interested in restaurant recommendations I can suggest The Folly, which is a gastropub on the river with delicious food. Quite expensive, but it's nice to be able to treat these students to something out of the ordinary. I remember from my own C days that there were certain restaurants you only went to when parents visited.

Sorry to hear about the still poorly students. Hope they manage to get some rest and feel better soon.

We visited DS yesterday at O and he seemed surprisingly healthy. He used to get every bug going, but it seems as if his immune system is now working well! He has lots of work, but doesn't seemed too overwhelmed, but hasn't managed to do some of the things he wanted to, because of his and others work and illness.

Last year he only ever worked in his room, but has tried a few library sessions this year, but was put off by the slow WiFi and people coughing in the radcam!

DD (C, 2nd year), still enjoying life. has been hit with a lot of essays, still doing a lot of sport and tons of socialising, lots of formals and clubbing. Claims to be only one week behind (which is a miracle, if it's true)

I ended up doing a midnight flit last night to pick up poor DS who is really suffering. His throat is so bad he can’t speak so he communicated by typing in his phone and getting it to read it out… Now the battle to get him seen as a temporary patient at the GP.

Oh no, @pantjog, your poor DS. Whether or not your DH's suspicions are correct, it sounds as if he needs proper care. Hope he's on the mend soon.

I think the system of having to register as a patient at university and losing your “home” place is so silly. Ds had glandular fever and saw university doctor, but when he came home there was a major palaver to get re-registered; it was literally back to the drawing board with ID and all sorts, when they could see that he’d been attending that surgery since birth .it is ridiculous that you are suddenly “cancelled” like that.

Oh no, your poor DS, pantjog. Such a shame to be laid low now after getting through his tough first year.
Fwiw DD was able to get temporary registration quite easily when she got tonsillitis while was interning in another city, hopefully your GP will be sensible.

Best wishes to DS pantjog. We have the same situation as you DottyHarmer. There's one particular dragon among the receptionists at our GP who unfortunately seems to be on duty whenever we call, and whose main pleasure in life seems to be telling university DC - who - same - have been at the surgery all of their lives - that if they expect to be at home for more than two weeks then they have to go through all the palaver of re-registering, and then re-registering at Oxford at the end of the holidays. It's completely absurd.