University 2019/20 intake: vacations, vaccinations, va-va-voom restored and virtually into their third year

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Both of mine have morning graduations. It seems a strange time. I guess we’ll go for lunch after

DD’s is 1pm ish but she’s booked a meal with housemates and their parents for 6.30!!! We’ve got to get back for work the next y so it wouldn’t be our plan of choice.

Ds has just informed me he probably won't bother with the graduation. It's not open for booking yet. His housemates all want to go on holiday and aren't going to the graduation. So Ds wants to go away with them. One of them doesn't finish until July. So if the graduation date is before he finishes Ds will attend. But I can't see how graduation can be before his housemate finishes. I didn't go to university and Ds is my oldest, so the first to go to university. I would have liked to watch him graduate.

It may still all work out @icanbewhatiwant. Fingers crossed. The graduations ceremonies at UEA go on until the 26th July.

Morning graduation ceremonies are a bit off, particularly at somewhere like Durham which probably has a very SE England domiciled cohort. It makes the whole event much more expensive than it otherwise need be.

I thought he meant the housemate finishes his university course July. Which I thought was odd. But is is something to do with him being in the military. Unless graduation is before this lad finishes then Ds won't go. I told him I'll be sad if he doesn't do the graduation ceremony, Ds said not as sad as I'll be if my mates go on holiday without me.

@icanbewhatiwant I hear a lot of students skip their graduation. I get that it can be a boring ceremony but I think that achievements need to be marked and celebrated. There’s enough disappointment and sadness in life, you have to bank the good stuff. Having said that, I know if my DD’s friends were going on a holiday, she wouldn’t want to miss out.

Well DS has booked a short break at the beginning of the UEA graduation 2022 time-frame, but I'm really hoping that his ceremony won't be scheduled for the first or second day...

I'd say graduation is a rite of passage, wouldn't you? One of those standout occasions in life?

If it were me, I wouldn't want to miss it. I want the photo too. I have one of my aunt who graduated a bit later in life. We have one of DH's dd graduating. Hopefully Ds2 and ds3 will graduate one day (Ds2 hoping to go to university sept, ds3 is only 12) I can understand him wanting to go on holiday. Just a shame the others in house don't want to go to the ceremony, then they'd all wait.

I reckon boys are less sentimental about such things @icanbewhatiwant, don't you? It's possibly not terribly 'cool' to do such things which may be a consideration for some?

In my year it was mainly boys that didn't attend graduation, and then only a few. My mother would have been very upset if I hadn't turned up as she had already bought an outfit!

My DS wants to attend his!
Well, has to get the degree first

I just wish DD’s place would name the date as it were! We have a week long window at least and it’s drivable so we won’t need to consider accommodation as we did for the older one who was further away. One thing to consider, from experience last time, if (IF!) our kids are in employment by June/July they will need to get a day(s) off work to attend graduation!

Those saying they are not bothered should speak to the students from the past 2 years who have not had the choice- I know of many students who were gutted to be posted their graduation certificates with no fanfare, no celebration, no goodbyes. It really is a significant event in life

I think it’s likely the very reason that graduations haven’t happened in the last two years, and that students haven’t been into university for in-person teaching as much as they should have been which means that this cohort are less excited about the idea of a graduation.
It feels like a box to tick after a less than ideal university education, and I don’t think that many students feel as invested with their university and department as they might have done in the past.
They are prioritising those people that got them through the last couple of years - hence the wish to go on holiday with friends versus turn up to a graduation.

DS recently got his graduation date, but I feel like if he’d already booked a holiday for that date, or had other plans he’d be like ‘oh well, graduation is just another thing that’s not going to happen’. They’ve missed so much that it’s just another thing!

Yes, you're probably right @blametheparents. Not a really great sense of 'belonging' when you've spent a fair part of your undergraduate course #wfh.

Or 'studying from home'.

Hmm not sentiments I recognise but apart from the first lockdown my DD has largely been in her student house and feels she has had quite a bit of interaction (albeit on Teams!) on her course so a half decent student experience in the circs

I agree with the comments about the level of engagement that current students feel towards their uni/dept. For us it was a chance to see friends again, having been home for a few weeks by then, and to draw a line under university life. I continued to keep in touch with my faculty for a few years, attending leaving celebrations for staff members. There is no way that my DC will do this.

I agree too - my DS hasn’t made any close friends on his course AFAIK as it is modular and so not always with the same students and no social events to help them bond. Most his friends are from his sport and college, so I’m not sure how that will work at his graduation!
And my DD barely knew anyone on her MSc last year because it was all online and many were overseas students who seemed to be studying from home. She did manage to meet a few socially, but isn’t sure yet whether any of them are planning to go to the graduation which should be some time in the summer.

It all sounds so sad for our young people. Fortunately DD managed to consolidate the friendships from her course that she made in the first six months of university during the first term in her third year as everything was back to face to face learning. So she has flat friends and course friends. She never joined any clubs because she didn't have the time or energy and didn't feel the need to try and make more friends.

Ds's 5 housemates all study biology along with him. Though one is marine biology and another some slightly different biology. They have all taken different modules, but cross paths some lectures. Plus they have their 7th housemate, he was originally going to rent with them, but they chose somewhere out of his budget, so he rents somewhere else, but spends most of his spare time in their house. They have an empty 7th bedroom he often sleeps in. Another lad on their course often spends his days with them too. So there are 8 of them he's really good friends with, I think 6 of them want to travel together for a month or so. Ds says they want to remain good friends.

Just had a lovely chat with DD. She’s very busy but loving it. She’s juggling a 3 day a week online job which is paying rather well, with lots of deadlines, sports team matches and lots of 21 st birthday parties. She’s actually slightly relieved at lecturer strikes so that she can catch up. Sh didn’t get through the grad scheme stage but remains on their shortlist for future, whatever that means. She’s trying to make the most of this job as she may travel next year instead. I’m just glad she’s happy.

@Benjispruce5 that is so nice to hear. You can't put a price on happiness, and the rest can wait.

My DS is enjoying his job at a marketing company and has already been promoted. Pity he didn't find it in time for it to officially be his 3rd Year work placement, but I suppose it amounts to the same thing in the end. I did suggest that he contact uni and see whether he can make this an official placement but I haven't the energy to nag him to do it, and he doesn't seem to have the time.

My DS has made great friends at uni, but they are from all over the UK and he wont see them often. He says he doesnt think he will have much in common with his local school friends when he gets back and has outgrown them. I hope its not the case.

@minesawine ds's housemates are all from not far away really. They are at UEA in Norwich. One is from Norwich, we are Suffolk as is another, 2 Essex and one from London. Ds said he didn't meet anyone from very far away in this country, he met students from other countries. Maybe that's because Norfolk doesn't have great transport links.