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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Cambridge and Oxford - ongoing chat for those with a student currently studying there

999 replies

DadDadDad · 04/06/2021 18:04

Some of us have found these threads helpful, so I'm starting a new one to take us through

...end-of-year exams (and parties)

...homecoming for the vacation (and hibernation aestivation for this thread?)

...return in the autumn (and more normal college life?)

Posters old and new welcome to join the discussion. Any tips for finding a summer job?

Oh, and for reference, I have a DS just completing his first year in a small humanity in a tiny college.

OP posts:
Hoghgyni · 04/06/2021 18:32

I'm in. I assume your DS isn't a qualified tennis coach? That's DD's summer plan at her tennis club. Oh, & acting as childcare for two younger cousins at the polar opposite end of the country.

DadDadDad · 04/06/2021 19:47

Definitely not a tennis coach. Two years ago he had some nice work basically as a steward checking tickets at the gate of a Cambridge college which gets a lot of visitors. But with no foreign tourists that appears to be a non-starter this year.

OP posts:
Malbecfan · 04/06/2021 19:54

Thanks for setting up the new thread @DadDadDad. I hope you won't mind me hanging around.

DD has the offer of a summer job in a shop. Over Easter she wanted to make a vegan meal so cycled into the nearest small town to get some beans. A new shop has opened which sells amongst other things dried goods by weight. DD took some clean ice cream tubs along and got chatting with the owner. Because she has worked in another shop in the town, the owner asked if she fancied doing some shifts over the summer.

At the end of her 1st year, a lady who plays in the same orchestra as DH (and me before I got chucked out) was let down by her normal summer student and asked whether or not DD might be interested in working there. It was data entry mostly but you needed a good knowledge of Chemistry and Maths. Although DD isn't a pharmacist, her Chemistry & Maths was up to scratch and she worked the whole summer there (and earned a nice amount too). The lady who got her the job has no children/grandchildren and has always had a really soft spot for my DDs, which is lovely. In her 2nd summer, DD's tutors gave her some contacts at our local uni and she did 8 weeks there in a lab but didn't really enjoy it and getting the promised expenses from them took 8 months.

DD2 (non O/C) came home yesterday and by 4,30pm this afternoon had as many shifts in the local ice cream shop as she wants. She worked there in April and earned almost £200 doing 3 afternoons per week. Pre-Covid, she was trusted by the owners to run the place in their absence, and although it's not really related to her degree, it's cash and experience of the world of work.

sandybayley · 04/06/2021 20:22

I'm here!

To recap, DS1 is a 1st year at a smallish Oxford college reading Chemistry. He is very settled and happy, playing a lot of cricket and drinking a lot of beer from all accounts. We saw him this week and he is very happy.

He did have a fantastic job lined up for 2 weeks at a major sporting event but has turned it down to stay in Oxford until they kick him out. To be fair he is doing a number of 'micro internships' and then heading to the Varsity match in Leicester.

DS2 is also visiting his big brother in the post exam period. Not sure what can be done with a 15 year old but he is over 6ft and sturdily built.

I also have a Year 12 DD who is applying to Oxford for medicine in 2022...

mutterphore · 04/06/2021 20:38

Thanks for setting up a continuation of our thread, Dad.

CJB, you asked about DS1 finding a running partner and actually, he prefers to run on his own, so that hasn't been a possible way of meeting people (and no one seems to get up before late afternoon whereas he's up by at least 8am/9am) but he does play one sport at amateur level occasionally with some others.

The contrast between DS1 (C) and DS2's (O) student life continues to amaze me, as they approach the end of their first years - both on the academic and the social level. In the last week alone, DS2 (O) has had 2 Formal Halls, a subject-related social get-together, a trip out to a club with friends, a social event related to his sport, a social event related to his choir, a social event related to the JCR and daily informal social catch-ups with college friends to discuss subjects, revision, family, interests etc etc. He has several other social events coming up too alongside a huge amount of academic work and revision/ practice exam questions during most of his daylight hours. His tutor (who is actually on sabbatical this term) has happily marked - within 24 hours - timed revision essays that DS2 has done voluntarily.

By contrast, DS1 (C) has once again had no essays marked for one of the two topics he's doing this term. Socially, he knows no one at all who wants to attend a Formal Hall and of those who do attend these at his college, they're deliberately 'dressing down' as a sort of 'statement' against tradition. Mostly though people still eat alone in their rooms off takeaway plastic trays. There seems to be nothing at all organised for his subject or any JCR organised activities. Two out of college societies he belongs to have nothing going on in-person or otherwise, this term. No one he's met in college seems to have any particular interest in talking about anything but the most superficial things and are happiest doing things that DS1 hasn't really been inclined to do since he was about 10 or 11, although he'll go along with it just to fit in and he likes the people.

It's as if DS2 (O) is at a completely different kind of university and in a different world compared to DS1 (C). It's been interesting, if a little sad, for me to compare their two contrasting experiences this year.

Ironoaks · 04/06/2021 20:42

Thank you for the new thread @DadDadDad.
DS has nearly finished his first year studying physical natural sciences at Cambridge. Just exams to go now.

MiniJellyBeans · 04/06/2021 20:57

I'm here too - thanks very much for starting the new thread @DadDadDad. My DD1 is a first year at Oxford reading a humanities subject. After a slightly wobbly Michaelmas term due to some dysfunctional household dynamics, she has been much happier since returning to Oxford in a new household at the start of Trinity, and is taking every opportunity to have a full social life now that the Covid restrictions have lifted a little. She's determined to stay in Oxford for as long as she's allowed at the end of this term, but I'm sure when she comes home she'll be looking for some kind of part time work - not sure what yet. When she's at home she also volunteers at our local food bank.

Unescorted · 04/06/2021 21:07

Checking in... ta Dad3

MJB it seems the Oxf party season is open.

Over the summer DD is going to be working... they don't have exams but they don't stop making. Hopefully we she get s the chance to go to the galleries that were closed last year.

Ironoaks · 04/06/2021 21:13

DS applied for a couple of research placements over the summer but received feedback that they went to students who had done more years of undergraduate training.

His plans include an online summer programme run by DESY.

pantjog · 04/06/2021 21:14

Greetings to all. I'm an old lag from the other thread but with a name tweak.

DD1 at O studying Classics, 2nd year, mostly happily. DS1 at C studying Engineering, 1st year, not very happily, alas.

@mutterphore I can really relate to the inevitable comparisons. In my case it's also my O student who is happy, settled and busy, with in-person teaching (at least half anyway). My C student has been to another formal hall now, but it was still socially distanced...Ugh. So much seems to depend on how individual colleges are organising things. And it's such a pity that your DS1 hasn't found his "tribe" yet. They must surely be out there somewhere.

All my DS's teaching is still online and I have a nagging fear that lectures will still be online next year, something which has contributed massively to his difficulties in keeping up.

I think I'm repeating myself!

HeyBells · 04/06/2021 21:58

Thank you for the new thread. I mostly lurk.

DS is 3rd year NatSci (C) in the middle of real in person finals. He struggled last summer after lockdown with staying motivated and with online exams so despite the 7 exams over a short period, it might suit him better.

DS is hoping to stay on for 4th year - needs a 2:i but it all rests on this year as last year's exams won't be counted due to Covid. Incidentally OYBBK DN (former C mathmo) managed to stay on for masters with her 2:i a few years ago.

No bumps this year in C. We were talking about how next year the former novices will be the experts; a lot of knowledge passed down in all sorts of areas for students could be at risk such as organising May Balls.

justaweebit · 04/06/2021 22:06

Checking in! Good to have a new thread.

It's been good to see everyone's updates - reassuringly mixed! DD (O) still has essays to submit until next week, along with tutorials and revision classes. 4 x 3hr exams but not til 9th week. So a bit to go yet....she's far more settled since returning after Easter, following a challenging first term (Covid/workload) and really struggling whilst working at home in term 2. I can't fault the patience of the college and her tutors (I wasn't as tolerant as them!!!)

The college have them offered all undergrad students the option of staying on til the end of 10th week, so they can 'relax and socialise'. Can you imagine? So, she's planning on being collected on the 7th July. This seems very generous/slightly mad on the college's part!

CinnamonJellyBeans · 04/06/2021 22:08

I'm here too.

DD1 is a first year at Cambridge. She has gone out of her way to ask people out for coffee/walks/dining hall/drinks and has made lots of friends to satisfy all her needs from cocktail bars to sport to scribbling ideas on napkins. She has been very lucky. I'm quite suprised at how outgoing she has become.

Having said that, she went to a very bogstandard school, with some very basic teachers. Now she has escaped the land of grey tracksuits, electric scooters and charity shops, she'd be mad to waste a single second

JulesJules · 04/06/2021 22:27

Thanks for the new thread @DadDadDad . D1 is at Oxford, history joint, just coming to the end of her first year. Such a tough year for all of them, hoping next year will be better. She'll be living out next year in a shared house.

Pepermintea · 04/06/2021 22:57

Thanks for the new thread

DS is at O studying maths. He's back in college this term and although he says most Freshers are back, only 3 of the 9 mathematicians are there- the other 2 are international students who have been "stuck" here! He is happy to be back, and being quite sociable for a mathmo! But I feel that I know very little about his life compared to the amount that some of you know about your DC? He's not a big sharer!

sandybayley · 04/06/2021 23:08

@Pepermintea - don't worry, I know very little. I glean stuff from DS1 by bribing him with pictures of the dog and by interrogating his siblings. I have no idea about any academic stuff other than it is 'alright'. I know quite a lot about inter-college cricket though and the quality of food.

CinnamonJellyBeans · 04/06/2021 23:19

@pepermintea: Dog and cat photos is indeed the way to go.

FingernailNibbler · 05/06/2021 00:45

Thank you, @DadDadDad My DD is an MML fresher at Cambridge. Mixed year, but she sees the bright side. She struggled in Michaelmas term, with remote learning and dealing with the admin of registration and scheduling. She was back at home for Lent term, and due to determination and some helpful input from her DoS, whose classes she loves, she got back on track and really caught up with her work. This term, she was delighted to be back and seems to be thriving. Enjoying the broadening social opportunities. Looking forward to upcoming social with bouncy castles (sounds fun!) Has exams until the 9th I think, but staying on until the end of the month. Has been swimming in the Cam and had a day out to Grantchester, which sounds idyllic. To be honest, I would love more communication, photos, etc, but I'm thrilled she is happy. And she absolutely loves her course. Smile

ErrolTheDragon · 05/06/2021 08:33

I'll tag along for a bit longer - though my DD now has only the presentation of her final year project to do on Monday so after that I guess she's got nothing but unbridled hedonism before graduation - what form that will take who knows, but we're still hopeful of there being something in the college gardens for parents.

Re summer work - I don't know if they've relaxed the rules this year and last, but the C engineers usually have to do some amount of relevant internship over the first two summers as a course requirement. The department had quite an extensive contact list (including work in their own labs) , but DD found many of the companies really only wanted 2nd and 3rd years. She got lucky because she'd won an IET scholarship sponsored by BT and that gave her some sort of priority applying with them .... downside was it was a full 3 months in rather grotty digs in Ipswich. They did give a weeks holiday within that but she spent 3 days of it helping with an access course at her college so we went and had a holiday down - not somewhere we'd have chosen but Suffolk has its charms after all.
Then in her 2nd summer she got an internship with a small electronics design consultancy a bit outside Cambridge; they rehired her to work remotely last summer and then offered her a job. If things had been normal she'd probably have had last summer off and done a few weeks of outreach type things (some sort of scheme going around camping and doing STEM engagement things with kids...she'd done a small amount of that in Cambridge). I don't know if any of that type of thing is happening this year but can be a fun but good thing to consider.

I guess what I'd take from this is that it's worth checking with department (and maybe college) resources for information; that it's pretty normal not to find much in the first year; but that it can be worth starting to look quite early in the second year - Michaelmas and the Xmas vac.

HuaShan · 05/06/2021 08:38

Thanks Dad checking in.
DS is a Maths student at a big college, although not actually there as he chose not to go back when he was given the choice. I did wonder this week if he was slightly regretting his choice although he maintains he is not. I think he found the first term very difficult socially - he tried very hard in the first couple of weeks, then had to isolate, came out into lockdown and seemed very glad to be home. He doesn't like the partying and drinking and doesn't quite seem to have found any friends. He is very work focussed and doing really well academically so at least no worries on that score.
He has the offer of some work in a pub chain over the summer but isn't sure if he will take it or not yet. He is muttering about cracking on with some computer science courses, meanwhile I am trying to prise him out of his room.

Ironoaks · 05/06/2021 08:54

it can be worth starting to look quite early in the second year - Michaelmas and the Xmas vac

Good advice; thank you @ErrolTheDragon

Lovecatsanddogs · 05/06/2021 10:01

DD is Vet Med fresher at Cambridge smallish college. Loves her college, course and sports club and has just finished her exams. Will be staying up an extra month for the social events and to be able to enjoy the city without the pressures of work.
Will most likely resume her job in a local cattery when home if she is needed.

MiniJellyBeans · 05/06/2021 11:44

@CinnamonJellyBeans. "Having said that, she went to a very bogstandard school, with some very basic teachers. Now she has escaped the land of grey tracksuits, electric scooters and charity shops, she'd be mad to waste a single second"

I think, as well as having similar user names, we must be from the same town/our DDs must have been at the same school Grin

CinnamonJellyBeans · 05/06/2021 12:08

Awwwww, that's just so lovely to hear @MiniJellyBeans. Vet med eh? She must be a brilliant student.

Both my kids are very lucky to get a free education and most of their teachers are good examples of the profession. However, quite a few of them do not/are not capable of teaching to grade 9s and A* (even at A level). It's a good job she followed the syllabus and trawled through examiner reports.

Some teachers would get defensive and angry when she was smarter than them, no matter how modestly she imparted the answers/points. I am so proud of what she has achieved, but I am not surprised at all. She has a good brain, but more importantly, is not afraid of graft and will find a way to get what she wants.

MiniJellyBeans · 05/06/2021 12:32

@CinnamonJellyBeans No, not vet med - she's studying a humanities subject!