The CDE of University Life (2019/20 cohort) - assignments, flat-hunting, Halloween and the end of their first term fast approaching

[NewModelArmyMayhem18]

Previous thread - Obvs the end of term is looming sooner for some than for others? I guess the Oxbridge posse will finish by the end of November or just into December?

Well costing £150 per week for halls this year is a flat much cheaper I am wondering???

@SchrodingersKitty much to my DH disgust I went and rescued my DS from his laundry nightmare last week, he’d become so overwhelmed, had tried to go to laundry at all times of day and hadn’t managed to get a machine, he had no clean clothes and was getting very fed up with it all.
I took him to a laundry off campus and he used several machines and got everything done in one go, it was good for him to use a proper launderette as he’d not been to one before and I think they are more efficient than the ones on campus (the dryers especially). We are only 1.5 hours away and I felt it was a positive thing to do, he asked and needed my help, so I put the backpack on!!
My DH thinks I over parented 🙄

Not really, you showed him a different way to do something. DS is phoning us for cooking advice well his dad really. I would not consider that over parenting. You would do it for a good friend.

That’s bad about people nicking food. It will be the person they don’t see. The unseen flatmate in Dds flat has been boiling eggs in the kettle. They thought their cups of tea tasted dodgy!

My DS1 has already paid a deposit on a house for next year, (another £200 required 🙄) it’s next door to his friends who are in their 2nd year so they aren’t in halls like DS.
DS2 has mumbled about maybe sharing with his current flat mates from halls but I can’t imagine all 8 of them will stay together and I don’t think they will be looking yet.
DS2 has lockable cupboards in his kitchen but no body seems to lock them, he doesn’t seem to have any problems with things being taken.
When I went to visit I fancied a cup of tea (he doesn’t drink hot drinks) so he asked on the flat WhatsApp group and a teabag was delivered to his door by another flat mate, so I think they are all respectful of each other.

DS has lost a couple of food items, but mainly plates, cutlery, glasses, and one of the other lads has lost a frying pan. The mostly absent flatmate has been exonerated so they are now working on the premise that someone is breaking in, possibly from the flat to which they are linked by a fire door which is accessed from a different staircase. No idea how they are going to solve this mystery. None of the cupboards have locks. I have told DS to move everything to his room.

My friends DS resorted to a locked box for his cheese in the fridge

I think its the luck of the draw - DD didn't have any problems in halls and still shares with the same students cooking on a rota basis. DS is fully catered so not an issue yet...

@ZandathePanda that happened to a friend's DD in her flatshare! Whatever happened to using a saucepan for boiling eggs??? DS doesn't seem to have had any issues with pilfering of food in his flat, so far.

DHs often consider DPs over parent. Just think mothers are more invested in their DCs' wellbeing generally.

DS did his first load of washing this weekend. Was surprised that he reported it "quite well." He's not quick off the mark with anything but slowly and his own good time he's getting there.

One of DD's flatmates takes other people's food. I don't understand why he hasn't been challenged yet. DD says he comes from a very wealthy background and doesn't seem to think it is wrong to just help himself from the fridge.

@Itscoldouthere: Ha! I was very tempted to do just that, but prevented by distance and fact that DH has been ill for last week (he would also have greatly disapproved if I had). I will certainly be 'supporting' DS to do all the rest of his laundry when we visit for his birthday at the weekend!

Stealing food should definitely be reported. Asking out of necessity or for temporary emergency is quite different.

I suspect wealthy flatmate #cba to go shopping. Had a flatmate a bit like this at university. She could make a ballgown, cook restaurant class food but couldn't be bothered to buy loo rolls or her own milk.

You may be right. He is from a different cultural background as well and is probably unused to doing things for himself as his family has servants.

Instead of “reporting” the stolen food I’d be advocating having a flat meeting and thrash it out. Good practice for future flat/house sharing where there will be no-one to report stuff to! DD’s flat recently had a bit of a showdown about kitchen filth (that hardy perennial) and things do seem to have improved (albeit the worst offender is now apparently sulking)

It may be that he doesn't know how to go shopping if he's never had to do it himself @Ginfordinner? Doesn't make it right, but I guess if no-one is challenging him he may just be 'winging it' until someone does. Maybe a flatmate needs to offer to be his shopping for food buddy?

DS seems to be doing ok with the laundry .... he gets it all done .. but has now come home for reading week with a large bag of washing .. his white t shirts are all a lovely shade of dirty grey so he's clearly shoving it all in together ! There were a few mouldy cups in his room but at least they were his own !! .. I was so worried at first but his flat mates seem a nice lot and no one takes food etc.

they are now working on the premise that someone is breaking in, possibly from the flat to which they are linked by a fire door which is accessed from a different staircase.

I appreciate that the students' immediate concern is the theft of the food, but the flat which may be being accessed through a fire door between it and another flat is something to report as that door should presumably set off an alarm when it is opened / only release when the fire alarm has been activated?

@VanCleefArpels, completely agree. They are all adults and need to sort things out for themselves. However, if that doesn't work, then of course report it.

DS seems to waiting for his mates to book trains home before he books his. However, they can probably afford to pay higher fares as it gets nearer to Xmas.....

@bigTillyMint I was going to suggest the coach but realise that's a big ask as it's a very long journey 'down south' - seven hours plus some.

DS has booked to come home the day after his last lectures, so he will have time to go and pick up his A Level certificates from school (which I'm sure he's forgotten all about!).

@NewModelArmyMayhem18, I think he wants to travel with his friends (who will get the train), but it might come to that - coach

Ooo forgot about A Level certificates. When do the schools get them?

Alicatz, a bit late now, but we made sure that all DSs clothes that he took were either black or grey so they could all go in together. He even took a black shirt if he needed something smart.

Mine never picked up his gcse certificates! Reminded him a million times. I am hoping that they are still in the school safe and that he can get them along with the next lot. Their school has a ceremony to hand out which DS refused to attend.

The detective work to find out the source of the theft is ongoing. I agree that the fire door should have set off an alarm and don't think it a likely option. I still think someone has a key. There are 2 empty rooms in his flat and it could be a former occupant of one of those. No attempt appears to have been made to access the bedrooms.

I gave DS a pack of Colour Catchers for mixed loads. I also bought some for myself as I have far less washing to do now.

Ginfordinner I'd say it works both ways, so if he's just helping himself to food, then his is up for grabs as well.

Are A levels certificates out then? Hoping DD's school will post them.