The CDE of University Life (2019/20 cohort) - assignments, flat-hunting, Halloween and the end of their first term fast approaching

[NewModelArmyMayhem18]

Previous thread - Obvs the end of term is looming sooner for some than for others? I guess the Oxbridge posse will finish by the end of November or just into December?

@SchrodingersKitty how were your parents when you were doing exactly what your DS is doing?

I can understand the desire for him to do well and not repeat your mistakes - but you came through in one piece (and maybe learned how to not leave things to the last minute?) so I’m sure he’ll be fine :)

@MrKlaw: good question! My parents had no idea what I was doing as I think I only phoned them about once a term (they were abroad and I'd been at boarding school since 11). I did a great deal better than I deserved with my terrible work habits and got a first, and took many further years to learn that I couldn't do everything at the last minute. (I think I was in my first job as a lecturer when I realised all-nighters were not a good idea - so I'm a terrible role model).

The reason I'm a bit cross about DS today is that he was very stressed and upset last night about not being able to summon the self-discipline to organise himself and I helped him work out a plan for today at his request. But I do take your point - and you are right!

Regarding leaving things to the last minute I wonder whether it is a personality thing? My eldest DD has always appeared to plan things and do most tasks in advance. My 16year old however, even now is pulling (almost) all-nighters getting assignments in despite me nagging/reminding/encouraging her to start them earlier. She’s hardly ever not been able to hand homework in so I’m hoping if/when she goes off to uni she can manage deadlines without my support. I’m a last minute person too and think I always have been. I remember my parents standing over me late at night while I finished off projects for primary school

On the topic of terrible work habits - I just spoke to my DM, who thought it hilarious that DS is replicating my bad habits!

@bigTillyMint the power is still off and they might have to sleep in the library!

Wow that is a serious power cut, wonder what caused it. In our case it was the street maintenance using a big machine that went whoosh right through a main power line underground, half the town went out.

Are all of your DC's getting shared houses/flats? My DS is going to live on his own in an apartment and I wondered if anyone else has chosen to do this

DD would get very lonely living on her own. She seems to have found her crowd. I just hope they all stay friends.

@minesawine: I think DS would quite like to do that, but his college provides flats so that's a great deal easier.

@SchrodingersKitty

I'm afraid in my first year I worked fairly similar to your ds. We (mathmos) used to have to hand our work in on Tuesday morning. So after Monday dinner we would congregate on one room and work through until we'd decided we'd done enough.
Usually it was between 2 and 4am when we finished but we did on a couple of occasions do all night. Although we did a lot of chatting and eating and messing around as well as work. not very efficient!
Hint for your ds though: Working all night, then going back to bed for an hour before going to lectures is a killer. Better to stay up then go back to bed after the lectures (although once one of our members then overslept the tutorial which was a difficult one to explain )

We did all settle down in second year and worked at much more sensible hours (usually!)

@Benjispruce hope they get the power back on. Dd says theirs is still on but she sends sympathy as they've heard they are sleeping in the sports hall which she thinks sounds very cold.

We have had a major internet outage. All the local Facebook pages are full of people complaining. It has affected loads of internet providers.

Hiya folks. My weekend with DD was a bit up and down. She was tearful and low when we went to bed on the Saturday and I was quite worried about saying goodbye. But we had done nice times together too.

Since I left she sounds more positive. No tearful calls or sad texts. She was busy putting her assessment together and planning her friends birthday, putting up Christmas decorations etc. She has a couple of clubbing nights lined up and they are viewing houses. So hopefully she is finding her feet.

Thank you for all your kind support. I've not slept too well recently so it will be good to not worry about her so much. It sounds like from all your updates that your DCs are getting into the realities of their work and house hunting. The houses DDs looking at looked very good quality compared with how I lived as a student - rents of around £120 a week.

the Tab has a piece suggesting 5 places to sleep for students evacuated from the two Durham colleges concerned. One of the suggestions is to use Tinder...

Is it just a Durham thing, this power outage or wider across the NE? Your poor DD having to sleep in a sports hall @Benjispruce.

I think the world is divided into those who do things in good time and those who leave things until the last minute. My Oxbridge educated sibling still does so in their job (as much as possible). Always said that they need the adrenaline rush to be inspired. I was/am totally the opposite. Mind you, I did ace my degree and they didn't . It's a personality thing as much as anything, I think.

Better to cock up one assignment/essay now and learn from it than later on. Are there really many students who ace every piece of work even if they are gifted with super intellects?

@minesawine I can imagine DS choosing to do something like that - have come to the conclusion he takes after DF and is a bit of a 'lone wolf', although he has always had lots of friends.

@Bouledeneige glad to hear your DD is being more positive. Clearly your supportive visit boosted her up and did the trick.

mine I think that’s a mature decision of your DS to rent a flat on his own, is it a lot more expensive though? My DS is sharing with two new friends he has met through one of his societies, ie; not existing flat mates or people from his course, he has been away with them for a weekend so hopefully knows a little about their living habits. There will be three of them, two boys and one girl. We’ve only seen the outside of the property, typical student looking terrace house divided into two flats but the internal pictures look fairly good and you can see the fire safety equipment etc clearly. .

I am quite shocked at the variation in quality of the student lets (and there doesn't seem to be much difference in the weekly rental figures). I am all for students not expecting to live in luxury but some of the rentals look 'manky'. And yes, they all seem quite expensive, although less so than halls in most cases (thankfully).

@Bouledeneige, that sounds a lot more positive for your DD - hope you can catch up on some sleep!

@Benjispruce, no word from DS on last night yet!

As a lecturer I think about 80% of students do everything at the last minute. The standard mode of working is to estimate the absolute minimum time needed to do the work, count back from the due date and time then start twelve hours after the last realistic moment. 10% of them will also spend an hour composing a bitter email about how they are never given enough time to do anything and asking for an extension that they won’t get. My students are coming to meet me at the end of this week to discuss their progress on a project that they’ve been working ( or “working”) on since September, due at the end of January. It’s always interesting to see how the word “nothing” can be turned into a five minute presentation on what they’ve done so far. I’m usually pleasantly surprised by what they can produce in a couple of overnighters though.

Dd is the complete opposite. Works doggedly. Does essays when set. Still always fairly mediocre academically. Her pet hate are students who do nothing then pull all nighters and get good marks!

Trewser it will pay off in the end. Only the very top of the class can get by with last minute work in the later stages of university.

Her pet hate are students who do nothing then pull all nighters and get good marks!

Yep. DD says the same. She tends to be somewhere in the middle. Due to her CFS she simply can't pull all nighters. She is afraid of failure so does work hard. She gets good resuts simply as a result of hard graft, not because she is one of those super intelligent people who can get the same results with very little effort.

@Benjispruce, DS says they're back in and he stayed at a friend's house last night, but didn't get much sleep. Hope they allow for this with essay deadlines.

@chemenger It’s always interesting to see how the word “nothing” can be turned into a five minute presentation on what they’ve done so far

heh. I would think the first term of first year would have some leeway to allow students to find their feet?

Trewser it will pay off in the end

This is what i keep telling her but she says she's still waiting!!