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Higher education

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Humiliated Sons Exam results publicised

409 replies

Frances39 · 08/09/2017 01:21

My son received his A-level results this August and is about to head off to university. However his college which he attended in their assemblies have being showing his picture and results in all the assemblies. My son did very well despite several unfortunate happenings during his exams, however he did very mediocre compared to the rest of the leavers. In their assembly's they put up the A*AA etc. students up and those going to Oxford/Cambridge, then they went on to show my sons grades and his less prestigious university as some kind of charity case. My son has not left his room now for a couple of days since hearing about what the school did, he did not even tell his close friends what grades he got. He feels humiliated and violated that they would do such a thing without his consent and that he was contrasted with Oxbridge students. I have no idea what I should do, I will he contacting the school and maybe a solicitor. I cannot imagine what my son must be experiencing

OP posts:
Headofthehive55 · 08/09/2017 12:53

I feel it's sensitive personal data which you choose to disclose. It is about whether it's sensitive and personal to the person involved. They decide whether its sensitive!

I don't think people quite understand it takes time to process, and accept the result. It can have a bearing on your entire career - if you had applied to medicine yet ended up doing biology it affects the job you do afterwards. (Not everyone can afford post grad medicine)

People should be allowed time to come to terms with it instead of expecting huge celebration.

Wondermoomin · 08/09/2017 13:01

Speaking to a solicitor about it 😂

Come on!! Get a hold of yourself and show your son the best example of how to deal with this.

He should assert to the college that he did not wish his results to be shared, that they should not be sharing any pupil's results without permission.
He needs to modify his perceptions of and reactions to situations. This might have been humiliating for him, but really it's very low level.
He needs to build up his resilience.
He needs to move on from it.
You need to stay out of it as far as the college is concerned. He's not 8.
He needs to deal with it. You can support him at home.

Shamoo · 08/09/2017 13:05

Just to add that this definitely wouldn't be sensitive personal data under the relevant legislation, only personal data.

NoProblemForMe · 08/09/2017 13:18

They shouldn't have used his picture/grades without his permission.

I'm a tad confused though as you say it's his picture and results, not that he was actually named. Did they use his full name too? If not then only the people who know him by sight will know that it's him. Not that this is any consolation to him/you.

Also, did they not use any other examples except him and the students going to Oxbridge? No students who have got apprenticeships, jobs, or pursuing other FE options?

I also didn't realise that colleges even had assemblies. How does that work when lots of the students will be coming in at different times depending on their courses Confused

However his college which he attended in their assemblies have being showing his picture and results in all the assemblies

Finally, congratulations to your son on achieving a University place.

SomeOtherFuckers · 08/09/2017 13:36

@RideOn at my degree results day (2016) our grades were up on boards but with out student number next to it rather than our name x

Frances39 · 08/09/2017 13:40

Sorry what I meant is Sixth Form College

OP posts:
Frances39 · 08/09/2017 13:44

He didn't even disclose to his close friends what grades he got. So for a teacher to go out and publicise his results without consent is out of line. To have personal sensitive information disclosed to 500 young people whom a lot of them know him is not low level

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Frances39 · 08/09/2017 13:46

Whether there is a breach of data protection or breach of duty. It already is clearly in violation of ICO rules on being "fair"

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NoProblemForMe · 08/09/2017 13:46

Ah, I have no experience of 6th Form Colleges.

Did they actually use his name Frances or just his picture and grades?

Frances39 · 08/09/2017 13:51

Picture, name, grades, university

OP posts:
senua · 08/09/2017 13:53

He didn't even disclose to his close friends what grades he got.

He's got problems. You should be addressing this, not wasting your time ranting at the school.

SerfTerf · 08/09/2017 13:55

That's a little harsh senua. We don't really have a culture of public grades here.

senua · 08/09/2017 13:58

Did you read the previous posts where he's hiding away in his room and threatening physical violence? His, and his mother's, reactions are not measured.

AccrualIntentions · 08/09/2017 14:03

Perhaps it's different because it was school sixth form not college, but I could have told you what pretty much every person in my sixth form got for their A Levels and most of the people I met during freshers week at university. (I say "could" now that it is years later obviously I can't remember any more because actually, it's not important.)

Not sure that constitutes a public culture of results but I don't think it's usual practice to be so secretive either.

I think a complaint to the school is in order for the way they've used his personal data but it should come from your son, not you OP. And you do seem to be fostering this attitude that he's a failure when he's patently not, that he has something to feel embarrassed about. I wasn't an Oxbridge candidate either, but I was still proud of myself and my achievements and no attempt to compare and contrast (if that was even the college's intention) would have made me feel inferior or humiliated.

SerfTerf · 08/09/2017 14:04

Yes I posted quite a bit upthread and said that supporting him to move forward should be OP's focus.

But you've singled out his non disclosure of his grades to his friends to comment that "he's got problems" and I'm just responding that holding your results close to your chest isn't so very unusual in the UK.

NoProblemForMe · 08/09/2017 14:04

That's pretty bad tbh if they did not have his permission and he had no idea they would do that.

He needs to send a calm, factual email to the head of the college, copying in anyone relevant, informing them that he wants his information withdrawn from the presentation immediately.

He can say that he considers it a breach of his confidentiality as they do not have his express permission to use this information for their own purposes. I wouldn't say too much about it having such an emotional impact on him though if I'm honest.

I'd end the email expressing disappointment that they did not even have the courtesy to let them know what they would be doing.

Then ... move on and try to focus on the fact he's probably done as well as/better than most of the other students in his year. He's got a place at Uni and should feel proud of his achievement even if this has taken the shine off it. Once he's at Uni with other things to focus on this will be yesterday's fish and chip wrapper to him.

zippyants · 08/09/2017 14:05

Ask your son what he wants you to do. He's off to university - an adult - and should be in control - give him the choice to take action or not.

randomer · 08/09/2017 14:08

It sounds as if the school handled it badly and your son has successfully dealt with stress and achieved good results. 6 weeks from now none of this will matter.

senua · 08/09/2017 14:14

But you've singled out his non disclosure of his grades to his friends to comment that "he's got problems"

It wasn't "his friends", it was "his close friends". It sounds like he is in a bit of a mess mentally and that's not good if he is off to University in the next month. He needs to be more resilient than this.
If he thinks that the grades don't do him justice then he should consider re-sitting and re-applying.

TheBigPickle · 08/09/2017 14:16

He didn't even disclose to his close friends what grades he got

My four DC have all finished school within the last 6 years and I'd say it was unusual for them to discuss actual grades with more than just their closest friends. It's no one else's business.

I'm amazed at the number of Mumsnetters who are desperate to tell us all about their DCs amazing grades 😂. Seriously no ones interested in your kids grades.

Frances39 · 08/09/2017 14:54

My son and his friends have never communicated about academic performance.
It's not that "his grades do not do him justice" it's that information considered private and confidential was released and publicised without permission. On results day they were given their results in sealed envelopes for privacy, then only to go and broadcast what he got to 500 people.

OP posts:
Headofthehive55 · 08/09/2017 14:54

It's interesting how exam grades, are seen here as general public knowledge. There is a culture in the uk of a reluctance to discuss how much you earn, and exam grades.

It may be different elsewhere.
I know some people dropped out of circulation for a while after results. People want time to reflect. It really is normal op.

Headofthehive55 · 08/09/2017 14:57

I personally don't think destinations for leavers should be public nor their results. Unless you want that.

Headofthehive55 · 08/09/2017 14:59

senua
Resilience take time.
Acceptance takes time.

DiegoMadonna · 08/09/2017 15:17

At my school and sixth form everybody told each other their results. It was all common knowledge! Only 12 years ago.

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