DD started uni today??

[VanillaSugarandChristmasSpice]

Join me. 😢😢😢😢

Let's put on Mamma Mia!

Let's sing "Slipping through my fingers," and howl 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭🙋😭😭

And then pull ourselves together, pour a drink, put on some lipstick and say "Didn't we do well in raising strong, independent, intelligent young women?'

I watched Mamma mia in the summer with DD. I bawled when slipping through my fingers came on. That song had never affected me before but now I understand it.

DD started 2 weeks ago but is back home this weekend (normal here). She is enjoying it but finding it stressful living on her own. I feel lost but I have 2 other DDs to keep me busy.

Aw well done Vanilla for raising a fabulous woman. I can't imagine it (I only have DS 15 months). Well, I can, but I don't want to as its just too sad and proud and poignant. Cheers to you

Just try not to fall out with your DCs when sending them off. I fell out with mine when unpacking my stuff and it somewhat ruined the day.

I recall a sketch by Jenny Eclair in which she talks about the collective howl of mothers when their children fly the nest.
I howled when I first saw the "Slipping through my fingers," scene.
It would have been 2009 and DC were 11 and 13 and I could see myself a few years ahead. I had dragged them to the pictures to see a film of my choosing for the very first time, said it was only fair after I'd sat through years of Disney / Superheroes / Mission Impossible.
They had never seen me cry and were quite sweet about it as well as horrified at their mother sniffling in public.

One week to go.

My dd isn't going to uni this year but she left this morning for a big gap year trip to the other side of the globe. My eyes are leaking at the mere thought of 'Slipping through my fingers'

Sorry,all you howlers. "Slipping through my fingers" is absolute shite. You have raised independent, wonderful women. Raise a glass and cheer instead of howling. Did you think they would be babies for ever? They are still your daughters, just not living in your house. I really don't get the angst. < Dons hard hat against lack of maternal feeling flaming>

. How very dare you.

that song turns my tears on. i refuse to listen to it and was so glad i didnt hear it played on the radio today, the day DD left for uni. An Abba song was played but thankfully not that

OK. I take it all back.

DH got up at 5 to drive her 2 hours to get to uni in time for her 8am check in time (London uni so parking availability is in time slots) - she'd left the booking so late that all the decent slots had gone.

I get a frantic phone call saying "Mum!! They won't accept my driving license as ID. I need my birth certificate otherwise I can't enrol or join the Freshers events!😢😢😢😭😭'

So, I wait for DH to get back, hand over DS (still primary school age) and leg it down (getting a speeding ticket in the M1 doing 78mph ffs ) so that she can do the paperwork before the offices close at 6pm so that she doesn't become "the weird girl who didn't go out in the first week"....

......

Slipping through my fingers?? Gah!

That's more like it vanilla

Yes. Bloody teenagers.

Yes I am so chuffed I have a beautiful, funny and independent daughter! I am so excited for her and the journey ahead.. But tonight I do feel little bit sad ....

S

My Niece moved into halls today and just had a teary call from her saying she can't lock her bedroom door from the inside. They use key cards to get and apparently can't lock it from the inside. They can only lock it with the card when they have left their room. She's worried about sleeping without locking the door and having showers etc. Is this normal? How can this be uni policy? I've told her to put a chair against the door and we'll deal with it in the morning...

Hotel rooms are locked from the outside unless you have the key card, aren't they?

Has she tried going outside (with her key card in her hand ) & opening the door without it after it latches?

If it opens with a key card, as pp has said, it's automatically locked from the outside. No one else should be able to get in unless they have a key card. There won't be a dead lock because uni staff need to be able to get in in an emergency.

Is she sure she has to physically lock it from the outside with the key card? It probably does it automatically or after a few seconds at least.

Right so as she has told me. - you can only lock it from the outside with the key card there's no way of locking it from the inside. Same with the En suite bathroom. Her hall mate tested it with her and just opened the door without a card key. They asked one of the student wardens and he says that's just the way it is. That can't be acceptable can it? Not sure what to do apart from buy her a simple bolt to attach to the back of the door- but she's worried she would get into trouble for it. Just not prepared to have her stay in there if she doesn't feel secure.

Has she got a rubber wedge she could put under the door from inside to lock herself in?

The best thing to get so you don't get into trouble screwing door furniture on is one of the plastic wedge door stops - I use them in hotel rooms to prevent people coming in the room.

Like this

There is an ingenious lock on Amazon that my DS used on his doors in uni accommodation. Can't quite remember how it works, some kind of slim wedge shape that fits into the door jamb. It's portable and doesnt involve drilling any holes, so keep one in toiletries bag as well.
Just found it but can't copy the thread to here. Search under student door lock, it's the Howser one. Hope it works ok on her doors.

That can't be right surely? So anyone can walk into anyone's room at any time?

Is her door broken? Our wardens were older uni students who weren't overly helpful at the weekend...

My room had a key card too, but worked like a hotel - it automatically locked and only opened with the keycard. I had an ensuite in my room so I don't think I ever used the communal bathroom, I'm not sure if they locked. My ensuite didn't but was inside my room so didn't need too.

absolutely - slipping through my fingers, tears all the way.
i was so excited for her going to Uni, helping her shop and arrange her room, driving off after only a few tears on each side, looking forward to her new adventure. Yesterday a few WhatsApp updates and all sounding positive. And here i sit, bawling my eyes out. i had been looking forward to clearing all the mess of shoes , paperwork empty-go-knows-whats that get left all over the house. Now it just makes me cry and i couldnt care less if her stuff is all over the place or not. What a totally unexpected visceral reaction. im busy, husband and 2 younger ones at home - but no amount of logic is going to stop me feeling as bereft as i do today. the studying will have to wait, i'm going to meet a friend and then get the cleaning done.