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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Original poster

Preparing for Uni in 2015 continues...

999 replies

Chillywhippet · 13/09/2015 12:20

New thread

Old one here with loads of info

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/higher_education/2408327-Preparing-for-Uni-in-2015

OP posts:
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15
seimum · 20/09/2015 23:35

Still a week to go here.

Cleared out DS's cupboards preparatory to packing, and found a collection of items (DH's dress shirt, DD1's jeans etc) which had been missed by other members of the family for months. Now have visions of DS returning from uni after a year with lots of other peoples' clothing.

Having been so pleased by how organised DS has been over setting up bank accounts etc, I have now discovered that his mobile phone has not been working properly (screen goes blank whenever the phone rings, and he can only hang up on a phone call by taking out the battery!), and he has ignored it for months! Now has less than a week to get it sorted.

They're just such a mixture of competence and hopelessness at that age

Re contact from DC's at uni - my DD's would only phone/text/email if they needed something. I think I would try to contact them once a week otherwise.

I'm assuming DS will be fine - but I think some more 'talks' are called for before he goes.

Bagpuss555 · 20/09/2015 23:49

Ha ha. Sounds like you married a trendy dudeGrin. My DH is fed up of being compared to Greg Wallace he's growing a beard! Confused

mumslife · 21/09/2015 00:23

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mumslife · 21/09/2015 00:36

This reply has been deleted

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Decorhate · 21/09/2015 06:22

For those of you who dropped off at the weekend, hope your dcs have a great first day!

Horsemad · 21/09/2015 08:17

Grrr, started a period today Angry Interestingly, I've only had 3 this year (am over 50, so hoping not to have too many more!) and each one has been when DS has had some major 'event' going on Hmm. What's that all about then?!

When we were in Sainsburys yesterday it was funny - full of teens and red eyed mums!
DS chucked loads of expensive stuff in the trolley, I'm imagining his next shop will be full of 'basics' stuff when he's paying! Grin

Abraid2 · 21/09/2015 08:34

Haven't posted here before, but wanted to say that I have had my first period in eight months just as my son is leaving for university. Something hormonal going on there?

Am also thinking about getting another dog. My husband is unaware of this. Blush. The trouble is that a puppy would make the fairly long journey up to visit our son difficult. The older dog would be fine to come with us or be left with neighbours popping in.

And I have insisted that my daughter's boyfriend joins us for dinner on her birthday on Friday because the thought of only having three of us round the table seems lonely.

Fortunately my three-year-old nephew and his family are coming to stay. Hurrah!

FannyFanakapan · 21/09/2015 08:34

My DD is having a blast, enjoying life, but still we speak on FB 4 or 5 times a day about inconsequential stuff - I think its because she was away and out of contact for 2 months in the USA, so we haven't really "caught up" and we are close. Im sure another month and I'll be wringing information out of her.

Have to pack up an envelope today with printer cable, cards sent by relatives to our address, and suspiciously a packet of mixed herbs which she could buy herself, but I have a huge tub of it at home, and had intended to send her with some....

Im trying to disengage, but Damn I miss her! I thought her trip away would wean us away from each other, but it hasnt. I dont want to be this helicopter parent, but she has been so anxious, I want to ensure she is OK, without fussing.

vodkaredbullgirl · 21/09/2015 08:41

Horse mad i took my dd to Morrisons and bought load of basic food. I showed her what to look for and what not to buy. She got frozen mince and chicken, frozen peppers, onions and carrots. She has rice, pasta, noodles and tins of tomatoes. I also bought a loaf of bread and i gave her enough for sandwiches by putting them in freezer bags and sharing the bread by freezing them.

Not heard much from my dd, ive txt her and im sure she thinks im still nagging lol

Horsemad · 21/09/2015 08:49

Abraid2 - our bodies are having some fun with us Confused

Get the puppy! Grin (What breed?)

Fanny, you'll both find the right level of contact for you in a couple of weeks I think. At the beginning, there's probably bits and pieces you'll want/need to send; that will naturally slow down in a while. I wouldn't worry about being a helicopter parent, just be a kind, caring parent and you'll be doing fine. Wink

whoreandpeace · 21/09/2015 08:54

My DD has always been quite chatty to me on texts, telling me the goss etc, so I am getting lots of lovely whatsapp messages from her updating me on what's going on. WhatsApp is great in that it tells you when it has been read, so I know when she has read my messages and chooses not to reply!

One other little tip..... some friends dropped their DS off at the halls next door to my DD yesterday and they(the parents) were given a 'talk' by the hall manager saying 'we are not legally obliged to divulge any information to you about your DD/DS - many students choose to drop contact with their parents altogether and we respect that'. When friends told me this I realised that if I couldn't contact DD for a day or two then the Hall Manager wouldn't be particularly helpful in getting a message to her, so I asked DD if she would (with their permission) send me the mobile phone number of one person in her flat for me to use IN AN EMERGENCY (had to sign that in triplicate) so that I do have one person there I can contact if I have any worries. I also suggested that she offers her mobile number be given to that girl's DM as well. I hope this doesn't make me too helicoptery, but DD does suffer from fainting fits, so I would be concerned if I couldn't get hold of her for a couple of days.

whoreandpeace · 21/09/2015 08:55

Regarding WhatsApp - we have a family WhatsApp group so that all five of us can chat to each other about 'stuff'. All the kids love it - group family jokes etc.....

Horsemad · 21/09/2015 08:57

vodka, that's a brilliant tip re bread in sandwich bags, will def pass that onto him, thanks. Smile

Think he was taking advantage of me paying for his food. He's been told he needs to shop 'canny' - a few weeks of the money running low should reinforce this to him, lol!

Abraid2 · 21/09/2015 08:57

Horse, thinking of spaniel to go with our terrier, but it may have to wait a bit as so much going on. In the meantime, pandering to my hormones by looking at lots of online photos. Smile

vodkaredbullgirl · 21/09/2015 09:07

Ive got a 12 yr spaniel, still as mad as a hatter lol

Horsemad · 21/09/2015 09:40

Yep, puppies are time consuming, but worth it! Smile

mumslife · 21/09/2015 11:11

This reply has been deleted

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Horsemad · 21/09/2015 11:30

Smile Mumslife!

vodkaredbullgirl · 21/09/2015 11:43

Mumslife Grin

I got it on my phone, never know how to use it lol

bigbluebus · 21/09/2015 12:26

Just got back home from the gym. It's the 1st time in nearly 4 months that he's not been here Sad. On the plus side, my kitchen is as I left it - no spilt milk/cereal/bread crumbs Grin
Have been messaging DS on Whatsapp. A bit concerned that he was ignoring the bits about what he has been eating. Turns out he only had toast yesterday as he "didn't feel hungry" Sad. This is a lad of 6 ft 3 who is normally scavenging in the fridge/freezer/cupboard. He did say he had a meal on Sat night though as one of the lads in his flat cooked for everyone - no idea what though.
He's got this morning free but then a programme of events starts this afternoon so hoping he'll be out and about more - having spent most of yesterday in his room. He did say he would cook something tonight - but I think he's a bit anxious about cooking with an audience in a new kitchen.

stonecircle · 21/09/2015 13:15

Oh gosh, yes, bluebus - I hadn't thought about cooking with an audience! DS likes a clear deck and no spectators!

Puzzled to see we had 5 x 4 pint bottles of milk in the fridge yesterday - clearly DH and I haven't readjusted our milk purchasing habits to reflect DS's absence!

And as to hormones .... very much post-menopausal here but horrified to develop a nasty cluster of spots over the course of the last few days.

When I started university my mum developed a nervous rash. Rather than prescribe medication however, our GP despatched his daughter (who was in the year above me at the same uni) to check up on me and report back. So he was able to tell my mum that, contrary to what my tearful phone calls suggested, I was actually absolutely fine!

whoreandpeace · 21/09/2015 13:29

I've sent DD a 'Hugbox' a couple of times in the past (mainly when she was revising for exams). Cheapest is £10. I'm going to wait a week or so, so that the chocolate/biscuit mountain that I sent her there with might have diminished.
Hugbox link

mrsrhodgilbert · 21/09/2015 14:07

I've had a text from dd, who had a nasty cold when we dropped her off on Saturday. She's lost her voice, cue my response to remind her of all the cold remedies I packed for her. After a few minutes worrying she replied to say its probably because of all the singing she did last night. I give up.

MossAgate · 21/09/2015 14:26

Was it singing or screaming songs? Grin

Our carefully arranged meningitis vaccine now clashes with one of my dc's compulsory introductory talks. The good news is that distraught begging actually works.

I am envying people who have already done the drop off. It really is an organisational marathon.

Horsemad · 21/09/2015 14:45

My DS has sent a text to say he's registering to join the gym - he is the ultimate couch potato computer geek - has he been abducted by aliens? Grin

Oh and yesterday before we left DH nipped into the en suite for a week, DS came back into the room and said 'is he in MY toilet'?! I said 'Yes, but you've been in his for 18 years' - oh the irony! When I told DH he said 'mmm, you mean the toilet I'm paying for'? !