Nursery report not adding up with what we thought. HELP PLEASE!

[MamaTurtle]

Hi!

I am new to this site - I found it when googling and thought you might be able to give me some advice. Apologies if I'm doing something wrong.

My daughter, who is 3years 8months, goes to nursery, and has just received her 'end of year' report which outlines how the children are doing.

It says that she's a pleasure to have in the nursery etc., but also says that she's performing averagely and 'meeting most of the milestones'.

However, her grandparents, and my friends, are always commenting on how bright she is - we're having her (privately) assessed for being Gifted, as we think she seems to show signs of this.

Here are some of the things she can do:

• Count to 10
• Get herself dressed
• Constantly asks questions - 'why are we going to town, Mummy?'/'How does the bus driver know where he's going?'
• Knows the alphabet
• Can make a necklace out of beads
• Knows how to make a sandwich, and can repeat the instructions

So, my question is this: Why do the nursery not register that she is highly able, probably moreso than many of her peers?

Should we be looking at moving her to an Independent nursery where they will recognise, and nurture, her abilities?

Can we start her at school early so that she is sufficiently pushed?

Thankyou, in advance, for your time.

of course its a joke, the child is nearly 4 fgs! i'd be worried if she couldn't do the things listed....

I don't really find it too hilarious, if this girl turns out to be 'average' and her mum is disappointed in her.

I didn't realise this was on G&T thread - I would not want a G&T child and if she can only count to 10 may well be well below average when tested.

Counting to 10 is OK, this is reception entrance level isn't it?

OP, what else does your DD do?

no, reception is the sep after they are 4

TBH I thought reception entrance level quite low, expectations-wise.

Don't bother getting her tested, it just makes you look vain and insecure.

My parents did and at that age I was assessed as having an IQ as 152.

Thankfully I'm thick as pigshit now

At her age I was a fluent reader of Famous Five books and I used to read them to my eighteen month old sister. I wouldn't have believed that unless I'd seen it on a very early camcorder.

can tests really be accurate at that age anyhow?

PMSL at 'gifted' 3.8 year old counting to 10.

Mine must must be sheer fucking genius then.

Gifted my arse.

PMSL @ GeekoftheWeek!

Dear Mama Turtle

Yes your child is definitely gifted and talented.
I think you should see if she can start at school in September. With her skill set, it wouldn't surprise me if they put her straight into year 3...or perhaps higher.
I expect all the mummies on here are just jealous, and that's why they don't understand you. this is only Mumsnet after all. Perhpays you might find some more understanding peeps on Netmums, hun.

xxxx

Op - mine is same age and can do the same as yours and more. She is clever but not 'gifted' - although if it helps, Stephen Hawking was undistinguished at school and there was a question mark over whether he would achieve a first. So there's always hope, I say.

DD1's nursery realised a little boy 3, was exceptional when a playworker got a game out and he started reading the instructions to her.

I think this thread does highlight that the whole gifted and talented programme in schools has a lot to answer for.

And I feel I can say that as a parent of a child who is allegedly gifted.

I think there are very few who are truly "gifted and talented", it's a label that is used to define the top percentage but that range differs so much from school to school that it seems pretty useless to me.

I don't think that dd is truly gifted. I think she is an avid reader who loves to write stories and has fantastic comprehension skills.
I have so far resisted suggestions to put her up a year although she does have a small proprtion of lessons with the year above, I don't think it would be suitable. I really don't like her being referred to as "gifted".
She isn't. She is above average bright in her school. In another school she could be simply average.

I don't know why it is so important for the op to have her child assessed as gifted at 3.8 Is it a status thing or PFB maybe?

Quite sad for the child though. far better to let her carry on being a child and realise her full potential through supplementing the schools efforts rather than looking to "push her".

Children shouldn't be pushed into academic excellence.

please come back mamaturtle... tell us more about your lovely DD. not the stuff she can do, just who she is.

Hi OP

Your daughter sounds lovely and bright - in that she is engaging with the world around her in an inquisitive manner and wanting to learn more.

I'd be more relaxed about the nursery report - what she is doing is normal for her age and development and pushing children into academia early can sometimes be hard for the child, at this age social skills are the most important, including learning through free play.

My DS is 2.4 and he can do all the things you listed but I don't think he is exceptional in these abilities, he is just a fast learner and wants to keep up with his older sister.

There is plenty of time in the future for worrying about school reports.

Mama Turtle, I can understand wanting an objective opinion about your child. However, I would say to leave well alone for now if she is happy. If she needs anything more in the future, it will become apparent.

In my very limited experience, being exceptionally bright is often paired with terrible social skills which can blight a child's life. Tbh, I would only become concerned about her level of intelligence if there was some sign that it may be making her unhappy.

She sounds a lovely child. Don't worry about pushing her - the truely bright generally find their own level.

oiteach, just to say well done for resisting them putting your dd up a year. I was moved up two years, and it contributed to my misery at school. A four year old doesn't have much in common socially with seven year olds, and I didn't learn how to make friends. I was so very unhappy.

Just read the OP and seen the pages - it is a joke isn't it?

MMM - DD is generally a lovely, happy little girl. She has CF, which generally makes life quite hard for her, after being born at 24 weeks. She enjoys most 'girly' things - playing with dolls and teasets etc. and loves finding out about the world around her.

good try, 8/10 for effort.