NEW THREAD FOR OJ - REST IN PEACE STEVE - STRENGTH AND LOVE FOR OJ AND THE CHILDREN

[Buda]

Hope this is ok - both other threads seem to be full or almost full now.

We are all thinking of you Jo.

Trifles and rum and bubbles at the ready.

OJ.So sorry to hear about that wicked twisted sil text message.I think she must need comiting to a mental insitution along with mil.How CRUEL to send you that text.Its not really for me to say but i wouldnt let any of them see your children.It would confuse them why they are being so evil,esp if they start saying untrue things about you and steve.You must be an amazing strong women.I would have totaly lost the plot by now and have wanted to get revenge on them.LUckily you have managed to deal with them totaly dignified.You shouldnt have to be put in this situation.If steve ever did go to her in a dream i would be sure it would be to haunt her and warn her off.Why do they think they have the right to torment you when you have just lost your steve and had nursed him to the end.WICKED .WICKED PEOPLE.tHEY HAVE A TWISTED VIEW OF THINGS.

definitely ignore it ..she can't even prove you read it ..pass on the evidence to those that need to know and, personally, I would be inclined to change all your numbers if I was you. It is only you who decides who your children should see, you do not have to answer to anyone over this. The sws clearly are aware of the situation which is great. Sending you lots of good vibes.

Jesus H Christ!! A bunch of nutters, you do the right thing to catalogue their abuse, I would seriously start to look into injunctions if this behaviour continues. Not healthy for you or the kids, use their own words to fight back, hold on to them pass them on,but do not destroy them, they clearly show they are abusive and threatening.

So sorry about your dh, x

God they are so mad with you because they couldn't damage the wonderful relationship you and steve had so now they are trying to upset you with total made up crap. You have been so understanding and selfless throughout with his family and they are pissed off. Carry on showing them that you are way above all this shit, as you said, keep it as evidence and pass it on to the appropriate people. They are jealous of you and what you had with Steve, they can never take that away. Keep strong, hope the kids are doing ok x

I wonder who this vile sister thinks she will have to answer to!!

OJ - they're not worth wasting your energy on. Let someone else deal with their crap. Make sure your gp is aware of the hassle you are still getting, so that he will have a record of it also.

x

I'm fuming for you oj. Change your number or have their numbers blocked.

your ils really do beggar belief!
i hope you manage to break all contact with them. they truly are vile.

I hope you and the children are doing ok. Is Elliot still being the 'man of the house'? Bless him!
Love, hugs and prayers to you all.
D xx

she reminds me of DH,s "mum", she left 4 children aged from 18 months to 5 went off and had another 5 with her new man.

she has done her best to cause trouble,be nasty and is generally a very nasty peice of work so dh and his siblings have nothing to do with her.

SIL and MIL and projecting their guilty feelings onto you, you that one that steve loved and who loved him, its awful, i had crap from dh,s "mum" when she saw how much we loved each other.

you are doing the right thing keeping the texts and letters etc, they are truly evil and nasty people to do this to you at this time and not to mention the effect it will be having on you and the kids.

Oh OJ how cruel can 1 person be? My DP's mum did the same she left him and 2 others when he was young. Now she finds every which way to cause me trouble and upset so I keep my DS WELL away from her and the rest of the IL's. They even sent me texts and kept ringing withhelding the number but I changed both my mobile and house number. So OJ make sure you keep a log of everything inform who needs to be informed and if it carries on, take it further.

A friend gave me this when my mum died last year, haven't been able to find who wrote it though. Still brings a tear to my eye

When I come to the end of the road
And the sun has set for me
I want no rites in a gloom filled room
Why cry for a soul set free!

Miss me a little - but not too long
And not with your head bowed low
Remember the love we once shared
Miss me - But let me go!

For this is a journey we all must take
And each must go alone
It's all part of the master plan
A step on the road to home

When you are lonely and sick at heart
Go to the friends we know
And bury your sorrows in doing good deeds
Miss me - But let me go!

What a lovely verse.It seems very apt the sort of thing steve would say to OJ.Hope it brings oj comfort and to put in perpestive the situation with ILs.Steve and oj shared such love the ILs can never change that.They are sick in the head and should not be allowed to carry on with this torture for oj.They seem so self obessed and not in the least considering the damage they are doing to oj and her gieving process.
THe children and oj have enough to deal with missing steve and every day life with its trials of trying to get on with life with out steve.Ils will get what is coming to them when they pass on.NOT ONLY WILL THEY HAVE TO FACE STEVE BUT ALSO GOD.THATS OF COURSE IF THEY GO TO HEAVEN.

OJ I would change your phone number and you wilnot have to deal with the venom from them.

They are evil and bitter and you do not need them in your life

OJ, so sorry you are still getting this nonsense from ILs. I think getting a cheap, temporary phone is a good idea, but would a good (RL) friend keep the old one in order to monitor any more calls/texts? That way you will have evidence if you need it. Let's hope you won't. Maybe they are like naughty children and will stop when they get no response. This last from SIL beyond wierd, though- maybe she really had that dream- none of us can help what we dream- but no need to share it (kindest interpretation) or maybe she made the whole thing up out of sheer vindictiveness? Hope the kids' school(s) are being helpful. Routine and 'normality' can be a comfort sometimes.

Reflections of a Man

Where is that man so strong, yet gentle
Who loved to have his children near
That man so kind and loving
Yet a man his family would revere

Where is he who proud and tender
Held his children on his knee
And told them tales to make them laugh
Oh where is he

Where is he who cared for others? children
Who taught them right for wrong
Who showed them love and understanding
Where has this man gone

Where is he who by example
Influenced the lives of many other
Who was a friend to everyone
And anyone could call him brother

Look not for him nor weep nor mourn
Remember all the happy days
The special thoughts each one holds dear
And memories of his life and ways

Ask not why he had to die
Remember him and be glad
For those who never met this man
Are the ones who should be sad

OJ, i was stopped in my tracks today. I was in the charity shop (by way of a change ) and i heard yours and Steve's song, Solsbury Hill. It made me stop and think, we are having a rough time lately DP and myself, but hearing that song came at a good time for me, because it brougth home just how strong love is. So thankyou for sharing that song OJ and Steve, it has brought comfort and a smile to me today, smiling thinking of your lovely perfect wonderful love.

I am not changing my phone cos of them, I have an iPhone which saves all messages in conversation order so I have every text from all of them and from me to them since January when I got iPhone. I will save texts but not respond, I have spoken to school today to tell them no one from family can pick kids up.
I spent all morning at the surgery. I have 3 butterfly stitches in my hand and all bandaged up so no writing or pot washing for me then
bigcar we had 33 poems for Steve the first one was
he is gone
second one was farewellby friends

Oh OJ, what a time you're having.

Hope you're starting to feel a bit better physically - did the Dr prescribe anything to help?

Sorry you're still on the receiving end from Steve's family. They beggar belief, but at least you have the evidence to prove they're nutters!

Hope you feel better soon and that you have a nice weekend,

Lots of love,

XXX

whoops sorry i pressed send cos the phone rang but i didnt finish what i was supposed to be saying

bigcar we had 3 poems for Steve they were he is gone
farewell my friends
miss me.

i don't know how to find the farewell my friends one, doess anyone know it?

the doctor had a look at the two lumps i have and says they are cysts, i am very relieved to hear that as i was worrying about allsorts of things. i now have a second lot of anti biotics. lets hope they work.

OJ is this it???

poem by Rabindranath Tagore.

FAREWELL MY FRIENDS

Farewell my friends
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
Save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care
And the heavy with sleep, ever-moist eyes
The smile in spite of a lump in the throat
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
Each morsel that I was fed
Was full of love.
At every turning of my life I came across good friends
Friends who stood by me
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad, do think of me
For that is what I'll like
When you live in the hearts of those you love
Remember then
You never die.

Hi OJ, I think you do right by keeping the texts etc. I definately think they will hang themselves given time. I am so for you about this. How low can they get?
Glad the lumps are not too serious.
Take care
xxxxx

Hi Jo, thank goodness its only a cyst. it must have been a worry for you. I get much more concerned over little things these days. I think when you know firsthand that bad things can happen to those you love you feel much more vulnerable and susceptible yourself. Good they were able to get you sorted.

I agree with tori, its good to keep a record of any txts sent to you especially the abusive ones. Hope that you & the kids are able to have a restful weekend. XXX

Thinking of you and your wonderful children OJ. I'm sorry to hear you're still having this kind of abuse from your ILs. It is their sad loss.

Look after yourself. Take time for yourself.

Hugs to you OJ and to the children.
at Steve's family.
I think about you all, every day.

XXXX

Thankyou FAQ thats the one i have saved it on the PC now.
Steves family are shooting themselves in the foot really cos all this stuff is on file, i am hoping they will leave us alone for a while thou i expect to get some hassle soon about steves ashes and then about his possessions
i have had these lumps for a while and made many excuses not to go to the doctors, but i had to go to the docs today for them to sort my hand out, they didn't give me any tips on keeping my hand dry, it will be fun trying.

Plastic sandwich bag taped around the wrist Oj

SUCH a good look