NEW THREAD FOR OJ - REST IN PEACE STEVE - STRENGTH AND LOVE FOR OJ AND THE CHILDREN

[Buda]

Hope this is ok - both other threads seem to be full or almost full now.

We are all thinking of you Jo.

Trifles and rum and bubbles at the ready.

worrybum, I hope you are asleep now.
I am laid here listening to the cockrels outside my window and wondering if I can shoot them get back to sleep.
Was chatting on MSN until late with a mate who sent me a rose bush from Steve for our wedding anniversary, it is called gaurdian angel, how apt. I have put it next to the rosebush from you all.
debbie is coming this morning, she phoned me yesterday, she thinks Richard was. Out of order to phone to request the ashes, debs is happy to phone him and tell him just how upsetting his phonecall was I am thinking about it.

sorry you have been unwell and the ILs are continuing to behave so despicably. glad the school ceremony went well.

Frankly totally atounded adn outraged at these despicable people.

Stick to your guns OJ.

love and hugs

Yes it does seem quite weird of him - particularly as he saw for himself just how badly the outlaws behave. I think it might be worth letting Debby talk to him about it. He should know better.

Very pleased to hear the awards night was so wonderful. Congratulations to your fab kids.

The awards ceremony sounds fab. So sorry you were ill yesterday. It could well be your body's way of dealing with the tension and awful upset of the ILs' poor behaviour.

Hope today is better. Love to all. XXXXX

I hope everyone who turns up for the Memorial, asks wher you and the kids are, then not believe whatever the evil outlaws say and mutter under their breathes about the EMIL.

Jo - sorry I've not caught up for a few days. at Richard - definitely let Debbie speak to him and maybe also the funeral home, as they recommended him.

I'm very happy about last night though - it sounds as though the children had a fantastic evening and, once again, did you and Steve proud.

Jo was so proud of you all last night
Steve will have a huge smile on his face and also be so proud of you all. Your three amazing children are a credit to you both. Am so glad Elliot received his special award he has made his mark on his new school and done fantastic in his first year. Abbey and Bethan were fab and so proud of their achievement record books.
Hope you have a good chat with Debbie today and I too agree with the many mumsnetters that you should think of letting Debbie speak to Richard.
XX

i will ort out photos, am having a tecnicol problem at the moment.
i am just off to do the school run and taking the kids to traceys out of the house, Steves memorial is due to start at 4pm and i need to be busy i will be back later on.

Have missed all that has happened these last couple of weeks.

Your inlaws really are unfathomable. Say no to anything and everything they want.

Often think of you.

N

Thinking of you this evening Jo.

So pleased that last night was so uplifting for you. I know I've said it before but Abbey, Bethan & Elliot are a credit to you & Steve! It was lovely that they could celebrate their achievements in front of the whole school. I can imagine how proud Elliot must have been with his trophy.

I am sorry that Richard's agreement to do this memorial has caused you so much pain. I hope they will now leave you alone. Its a shame they can't see past their own egos to what they are missing out on by not having you and the kids in their lives. Sometimes friends, especially ones like Tracey, are more valuable than all of the family put together. Tracey is supporting you in the way that they should be right now (and doing a fab job too!). Hope the cockrels don't keep you up tonight. Lots of love. xxx

i have put a couple of photos on from awards night. yhry madr us proud.
i have been out and brought steve a wedding anniversary card, it was tough trying to choode one that was just right.
i know steve has gone but i felt i needed to get him a card, it eill nr 5 wewks on monday.
on thursday tracey and i will be taking the kids and stevs ashes with us, i am not yet sure i can do this,

oj ,you can do this,You will do it for Steve.At all times you have always put Steve first and you know you will do this for him ,Yes it will be terribly sad and upsetting but you will feel so glad that you have laid his ashes to rest where he would want to be.

OJ sorry you are still having all this hassle, I hope that Lanzarote brings you all some peace.

Well done to the dcs for the awards

i am strugling with leaveing his ashes there and coming home without him, debs said i don't have to do it this time if i don't wamt.

Maybe just go easy on yourself and 'give yourself permission' to see how you feel when you get there?

Steve is in so many other things too though, your dcs your memories your eternity ring.

Photos are lovely nice for the dcs to have something to smile about after everything recently

Oj, i have just caught up with this thread after some time away and think you have such strength, i really hope lanzarote wil be time away (literally) from the black cloud of your outlaws. I think 1dil sounds really sensible about making your mind up about Steves ashes when you get there.vibing support to you.

Oj ,you can do as tracy suggests maybe when you are more ready to take Steve to Lanzarote it may be a bit easier for you.It seems the time possibly is not right for you at the moment.There is no time limit for when you have to do this,so if you are feeling unsure about it,leave it till you do feel ready,Steve will be at peace even at home for a while because you and the children are there.

I don't think I will ever be able to let him go, today is/ was our 11th wedding anniversary ( theres a thread somewhere) when I came downstairs the was a bunch of lilles with a card on the top which simply said "Jo" I was fairly sure Steve was in the other room and had. Brought them for me, I searched the house but of course he is not here. Things will get easier won't they, they have to.

yes they will oj ,but you have to give yourself lots of time .It is very early days for you and you have to allow yourself to do your grieving.I am sorry its such a poignant day for you ,but Steve is in your heart and in your thoughts and death cannot part you.You will get through these sad and desperate days and weeks,and one day you will realise you can smile and be happy once again.You have Steves greatest legacy to keep you going and that is your children.Chin up oj ,take one day at a time.xx

They will others are around to confirm that who are more believable than me but they will