The Great Recovery part 2 - After Cancer treatment what next?

[TopOfTheCliff]

You may have finished treatment for cancer, be NED or in remission, or it’s just a lull between storms. You don’t want to dwell on the past but look forward to the future. You know you need to eat well, get fitter and pick up the strands of life again. This is the thread for you with fellow travellers. Join us!

There is the General Cancer thread for those in active treatment:
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/general_health/4969445-cancer-support-thread-92-christmas-happy-hour-at-the-patience-inn-7pm-tonight?page=10&reply=132553156

And there is the Stage IV thread for those whose treatment is ongoing:
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/life_limiting_illness/stage-iv-cancer-incurable-roll-up-roll-up-this-thread-is-for-you?reply=132555664

Congratulations @SierraSapphire. What do you feel now it’s been offered? What’s your gut feeling? Can you create some flexibility within it?

Thanks @Penguinsa and @thesandwich - I think I'm minded to take it. There are definitely downsides, but I've felt very disconnected for a while and quite insecure with the self-employment, and this will be getting out and about in the local community and my office will be 5 mins walk away. Money I think is good for the role, not as much as I have earned in the past self-employed, but a local authority pension will make a big difference. I said that if I still wasn't happy with self-employment by the end of June I'd do something different, so here we are! I don't know whether I'll have to fill in an occupational health thing and declare the cancer. I'm a bit nervous about needing to disclose it, don't want to be seen as someone who had cancer.

@Catunderling welcome to this thread! I remember you from the other thread. Great to hear you and DP have been going on some nice trips together.

@SierraSapphire Congratulations on getting the job! 🍾🍸🎉 A 5-min walk away sounds fantastic, no rush hour stress in the car or public transport. Plus out and about in the local community; LA pension. It's definitely got some great plus points hasn't it. Hope it turns out well for you.

I've been feeling very tired this week, totally exhausted actually, so plan to sleep all morning tomorrow and Sunday. It's very easy to do too much; I am still discovering my 'new normal'

Congratulations @SierraSapphire That sounds like the right thing at the right time, and it doesn’t have to be for ever if you get a yearning to go back to freelancing in a year or two. No one else will know what you declare on the occupational health thing, I think?

I hope you all have a restorative weekend, especially @SummerCycling 💤

That’s good news @SierraSapphire well done! It’s nice to have the choice and your reasons for taking it are sound.

@SummerCycling good for you resting up. I find it very hard to do and push myself too hard. I think that’s part of the reason my joints hurt so much.

I am away from home on my boat tonight. It’s actually really cold! Not summery at all. Missing DH to keep me warm!

@SierraSapphire well done!!!

Congratulations @SierraSapphire .

Congratulations @SierraSapphire !!

Welcome @Catunderling

I hope you can make it through to the end of term @FairyWren7 . I can’t wait for the school holidays and I’m only a parent haha!

I’ve definitely joined the ranks of not suffering fools any more. When I resigned from my job last year one of my colleagues says she would miss my facial expressions on Teams meetings when people were talking absolute shite. Sadly it was often the boss.

My GP is a bit uncertain about how to manage my symptoms post oophorectomy which is unsurprising. She wants me to see a counsellor which might be smart or might just be a way to fob me off for a while.

My liver clinic appointment was a bit disappointing. I was hoping to be discharged and apparently my blood tests in March were pointing that way but they were worse in June. I did have a hysterectomy in April so certainly had a lot more medication in the last couple of months. So we’re watching and waiting and blood testing for another 6 months.

@Remaker Oh I’m just the same. We have one of those managers at the moment, he deals with curriculum. He observed a few of the teachers in my department, looking at differentiation and then crucified them about the lack of it. His reports on their lessons were generic and looked as if they were AI generated! In staff briefing he offers $15 dollar canteen vouchers for the best lesson he has observed this week and then withheld it because no-one was good enough. This is while we can’t book supply teachers, so staff are given way more extras and I personally was trying to mark over 100 essays and exams (30 odd essays) in four weeks. I won’t let him observe me. Just utterly tone deaf to what is actually impacting people.

I observed the same teachers and their lessons were excellent with differentiation clearly embedded in the resourcing and class management. Grrrr!

@Remaker what symptoms are you experiencing? I’ve had the whole thing removed, total hysterectomy.

Im also getting a blood test soon. Need a fasting day. Probably Monday.

OMG @FairyWren7 that colleague sounds horrendous! Certainly needs some lessons in people skills.

My symptoms have been a bit of a movable feast. Two weeks ago it was uncontrollable crying, last week was the headache that wouldn’t budge. This week my skin has broken out. I feel like the GP skated over the physical symptoms and focused on the emotional ones which could then be passed off to a counsellor to deal with. But as we’ve established I am a cynic!

I hear you on the crying thing. I had a major sob last night. It’s usually when I feel angry about something or frustrated. Today I’m processing my decision but feeling more accepting and kind towards myself.

I tried some hrt - very limited levels, pessaries. Didn’t seem to do anything. I’m also getting deep spots right on my jaw line which was always a hormonal sign in the past, taking months to heal.

Lots of women our sort of age give up caffeine, really overhaul their diet etc. I think that might be worth a go. I need caffeine in this job though! But I won’t have that excuse for much longer’

Im having a decent Saturday, walked the dog, cooked a healthy veggie soup and made a huge lasagne with veggies which should sort our weekday dinners out for a couple of evenings.

Congratulations @Sierra I wish you the very best in your new role. As someone said, there are a lot of positives to it so continue to look at it from the brighter side.

I have been doing majorly okay, but I get tired very easily these days and have decided to take things more slowly, i have noticed that i need almost one full day to recover after a very busy day. I have also requested (fingers crossed) an echo of my heart to see if there has been any improvement. I had xrays of my shoulder and pelvis last week and yet to hear anything, I hope it is a case of no news is good news.

I have made a vow with myself to keep exercising, I walked more than 12k steps today, long may it continue.

Just done 3 hours gardening with DH, got all the plants planted and some weeding. Filled 2nd green bin. Absolutely worn out now though. Had a nice bath then a takeaway Chinese duck pancakes, now having a cup of tea and watching Race Around the World, very sleepy.

DD will take DH out for Father's Day tomorrow though keeps complaining that DH isn't excited enough about it. Got him a big cake as well, carrot cake. Did a Sainsburys order today with a giant Frosties and a giant coco pops and DS has eaten loads of both already. Still at least they have added vitamins in. 😂Floof also let me brush him with the new cat massage brush I got, normally he isn't keen on being brushed.

Hope everyone is having a good weekend.

@FairyWren7 I don’t drink coffee or any cola drinks but I do enjoy a couple of mugs of tea per day. I’d find that very hard to give up. Am starting to drink green tea which is supposedly good for the liver. I’m sure the quantity I have will do nothing but I like to feel I’m doing something.

The problem I have is balancing a healthy diet with what I can tolerate now I have very little colon left. I might try consulting a dietitian. I also am feeding DS16 who is a 6 foot eating machine and DD17 who has lost a fair amount of weight from the stress of the last year (and wasn’t carrying any extra to begin with) so I try to tempt her with her favourite meals. But then I eat them too!

I have been back onto cake past week or so, think it's A levels plus previous cancer checks but still doing 1200 a day plus exercise calories. Need to cut out cake again but Fathers Day tomorrow and have a lovely carrot cake from the bakers. Though DS is very helpful in eating all cake in sight and still manages to stay stick thin.

@SierraSapphire many congratulations on the new job!

@Remaker that does sound tough. I have two minor niggles that could be improved by certain types of diet but unfortunately neither diet is compatible with the other (one high fibre/one low fibre). Fortunately neither have unmanageable symptoms so I just try and find a middle way. A dietician sounds good.

Well I'm packed and ready to set off down to London today to fly out in the morning. I think I've worn out my worries on it and am mostly just excited now. Will update with some pics, and keeping fingers crossed that the weather isn't horrendous!

Well done @ClashCityRocker Im proud of you. My secret is to tell myself fear and excitement are the same emotion and I’m just excited!
My lovely DS has got me tickets to see my favourite sport in the Olympics if I want to go. Both my DB and my DSis are going so I may go wild and join them. It’s not DHs thing so I will ask a good friend if she wants to come. So cool! I like the idea of being a person who impulsively books to go to the Olympics 😎

Have a wonderful time Clash

Olympics sounds good Top

DD took DH out for Father's Day and we also had the cake.

We saw trampolining at the 2012 Olympics, the only thing we got tickets for, we tried for gymnastics mainly. I was surprised that some of the trampolinists fell off, it was quite stressful! We also saw Tom Daley in the diving qualifiers in Sheffield, again some of the competitors fell off the diving board, which would probably be about my quality of diving 😂.

It's good to do spur of the moment things though Top, our New York trip at the beginning of the year was like that, started just with concert tickets.

I went for a run this morning at 5:30 am! I took some honey round to my friend who has a sore throat, and I'd got my gym stuff on, and it was a nice morning, and I just thought, hmm I've been running during tennis, maybe I can run. My hamstring's a little bit twingy so I did a couple of miles running and then walked the rest. It would be fantastic though if I can run again. I'll see a physio when we're back from holiday. DM is still in hospital but she seemed a bit better when I saw her yesterday. I think she'll be there for a little bit longer, but only waiting for a care package to be put in, so I think she'll be fine whilst we're away just very bored and wanting to get back to her garden!

Lovely photo, @SierraSapphire I'm impressed you can do two miles if you haven't been actively running for a while. I am building up again but can only do about a mile before I need to walk for a bit still. Mind you, I am fat.

We didn't get 2012 Olympics tickets, but did get tickets to athletics at the Paralympics, which was a fabulous experience - I have very vivid memories of that day. I say go for it if you can!

I had a nice, gentle pottering weekend full of exactly the kind of things I want to recover (and stay recovered) for. A short run/walk (see above) first thing Saturday and bought pastries and fruit for breakfast from the market on the way home. A friend called in on Saturday afternoon, I did enough gardening that the experience of getting to our front door no longer feels like visiting Sleeping Beauty's castle, and we did some nice things with DH for Father's Day on Sunday. We had a cinema trip, the DDs and I made some slightly over-complicated and slightly underwhelming Tunisian dishes from a recent Ottolenghi column and we managed to have dinner in the garden between the showers.

Hope everyone has a good week. I'm feeling anxious about visiting my Dad on Weds (anxious because he's really not doing well and I haven't attempted the 6 hour drive there and back in a day since I had my surgery) and helping DD and her friends get to Taylor Swift at Wembley on Friday night (anxious because the timing is v tight to get there after school and I will never hear the end of it if they miss it). But, again, I guess I need to be grateful I am well enough to do both those things.

Have an amazing time @ClashCityRocker and Olympics sound fun @TopOfTheCliff

Congratulations @SierraSapphire on the job and also the running, it looks like it was a beautiful morning.

Little to report here (which is good!). Had a busy weekend, it was a bit tiring but nice to be able to do more "normal" things.

I hope the visit to your dad goes as well as it can @dotty2 , sorry to hear he isn't doing well. Good luck for Friday also, that does sound a lot of pressure.

May I join in?

Finished treatment in December 23, having been diagnosed with TNBC in January of that year, picked up by a mammogram. Was doing really well with recovery, NED, exercising, hair growing back, anxiety about recurrence present but entirely manageable, energy coming back.

Then BOOM! Anxiety and depression landed. I think I’ve used up all my resilience, taking the diagnosis on the chin and then grinding through 2 surgeries, 6 months of chemotherapy and rounding the year off with radiotherapy. Anxiety has receded, depression has not.

I feel so conflicted: I’m ‘lucky’; hopefully curative treatment, in a stable, happy marriage, financially fine, loving adult children and gorgeous grandchildren, live in a beautiful part of the country but I feel like…. shit, physically and emotionally.

Difficult to moan too much in real life as I am ‘lucky’, and have ‘got through it’, must be ‘so relieved’, ‘on top of the world’ and ‘just need to move on’, and others have it worse.

I read of others having recurrences, or much more challenging problems and prognosis and feel a bit ashamed and self indulgent

This too will pass, and I suspect that others may experience depression/exhaustion/negative feelings post treatment

Feel a little better for the vent

Hi all, just caught up on the thread after my holiday (which was great - lots of cycling and wild swimming).

Your trip @ClashCityRocker sounds amazing. Definitely send pics! Olympics sounds exciting @TopOfTheCliff. Congrats on the job @SierraSapphire. It sounds like the right move from a number of perspectives. Plus, no decision is final. If you change your mind further down the line, change again! I need to work out whether I want to re-organise my working life somewhat, so as to fit in better with doing other things that matter.

Speaking of things that matter, my abnormal mammogram and MRI from two weeks ago at my one year check-up was followed by two biopsies last week and an US. Got the all clear today! Yet another close shave. I cannot quite believe it. I seem to just go from one scare to another. How long can my luck last I wonder? I must park that and try not to think about it. I have decided to plan another holiday, this time without the background anxiety. Expecting another call from breast surgeon on Wednesday to confirm that the final passes of the biopsy are fine. But, she said she called me already as she is confident nothing else will come out of it than what they saw already. Next medical thing: LVA surgery at the end of July. It should have been tomorrow before all of this other stuff got in the way. We shall see whether anything gets in the way again. Fingers crossed.

Speaking of which, hope all is proceeding well on the lymphoedema front @dotty2

Oh, I'm so glad to hear your news @isaxx - that must be a huge relief. I'm sorry you had your holiday blighted though.

I'm 7 weeks out from my LVA surgery now, and my arm feels pretty much back to how it was before my surgery, in terms of mobility and pain. The deeper scars are still a little sore if prodded, but definitely settling down. (The incisions higher up your arm have to be deeper than the ones on the wrist.) My hand still seems a bit more prone to swelling than it was before, and I have been bad about remembering to wear my glove. So I can't say I've seen any benefit yet, but it's early days and obviously it's partly/largely about stopping it getting worse in the future. I have a review appointment in late July.

PS - I started my first ever thread on S&B a while ago asking for recommendations for lightweight long sleeved tops for summer to cover my compression sleeve. I actually had lots of very helpful suggestions and bought a few things but it's been so cold, I've mainly been wearing jumpers!