Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support Thread II?

[kokeshi]

Welcome to the thread, the purpose of this is to give anyone, who is having any trouble with their drinking, to come and post about it honestly and without judgement.

There are many of us that use the thread for support and encouragement: some in recovery, others just needing a place to share about their worries. It's been going on in one form of another for a while now and has helped many people.

Everybody's welcome, no matter what stage your drinking is at.

Jump right in, the water's fine

hows evryone doing tonight ? are coming out to play cubby ,hungry donkey ,teasle,purpleone ,koi
Im managing my no alcohol night so far so good ,although I had a moment earlier when i could of easily had a drink if there had been any to have

Hi all - am feelin pretty low at the moment & feel wine is the only way out for me. This is the 1st time I've opened up & kinda adnitted I have a problem. Tonight I've had 1 bottle of white wine & 2 glasses of perry. OK - I do have some reasones for this - my dad is having a major breakdown & is talking about ending it all, my mum is finding it very hard to cope & I work & have 3 kiddies under 7 - I know I'll feel mega crap tomorrow but I just have to do something to escape in the evenings WHAT CAN I DO?

skinnyj hi sorry i havent got any real words of wisdom for you ,but given the way things are for you and your family at the momnet ,its hardly suprising your trying to find solace in drink . Im sure Koi will be along soon with some proper advice

HI all. Hi skinnyj. Are the things you wrote about reasons or excuses?
Don't mean to sound like a harsh cow, honestly, just making a point?
I used to justify my drinking with 'reasons' too.

Anyone around then? I was quite looking forward to chatting, but then got caught up in home stuff, then Torchwood. Now some bloke is cutting up a badger on telly.

Am around for next half hour or so?

Sorry skinnyj, that sounded really mean. You have been really brave to even come on here and post, please post again!
How long have you been worried about your drinking for and have you tried anything? x

go to go to bed now ,hope someone comes along soon for you to talk to skinnyj and i hope your dad gets help soon , my dad went bibble (his words) for a while but we all got through the other end unscathed . Night night everyone else

Hi teasle ,i got caught up in torchwood too . Must go to bed im afraid otherwise i wont be able to get up at 6 ,mind you its a lie in i normally get up at 5 on thursdays ! how are you

Am ok. I feel like a shit with my glib answer to a new poster though.
Sorry skinnyj, it sounds like you are having a shit time.

I'll probably shuffle off too... night X

didnt sound glib to me ,perhaps a little direct ,but you came across as caring ( in a gengis khan way) only joking teasle ,goodnight sleeptight

Hey skinnyj,

Welcome to the thread, can you tell us a wee bit more about your drinking? HAs it progressed recently, do you think you're just using it as a crutch at the moment or have you always had the propensity to drink? I understand that it's a quick fix, and it works...in the short term. The problem is it ends up taking away more than it gives if it's left unchecked.

You obviously have a lot of stress at the moment. Do you have a supportive partner that you can talk with? Do you get anytime on your own just to do things for you?

I think the question is really, does it affect you enough to consider doing something about it? Either making an appointment with your GP or any of the other solutions some of us use on this thread? You're just at the beginning of this and I know it's really scary to admit it. Don't be ashamed, there are so many more people sitting out there in denial and not confronting their drink problems. You have been brave to take this step, well done. Keep posting and you'll find fantastci support on here.

ps. teasle is a really supportive poster on this thread, please don't take what she said the wrong way, it's really hard to convey tone via the written word. Just try reading it back to yourself in a Geordie accent (that's what I've just done, ).

JWFMT at you getting up at 5am...I'm usually just going to bed at that time!

Hi all thanks for your replies - teasle no offense taken at all!
Koi - I have always seem to have had a thing for wine but managed to restrict it to weekends only - now it seems to be every night just to escape things. I have seen a dr as am also depressed at the mo - I know drinking makes depression worse but that doesn't help. I couldn't actually bring myself to tell the dr about my drinking. She put me on Prozac!
One positive thing is join the gym which seems a good alternative means of escape & means instead of opening the wine at 6pm it's usually just 1 glass or 2 when I get back around 8.30pm.
Back to my dad - he's probably going to end up having E.C.T, yetserday they were talking about sectioning him as he's stopped eating. Who know's what today will bring?
Anyway, enough of me wallowing have all of you managed to conquer drinking problems - I expect the answers are in this thread some where but it's a mega long thread!!

Skinnyj the fact that you have recognised that your drinking is becoming personally uncomfortable for you is a good thing ,it means you can now take steps to check it. Having a few glasses of wine or even a bottle at the weekend is totally accaeptable ,its when you slip into the every night ,that the possibility of dependency rears its ugly head ,well done you for being brave enough to tell someone even if we do all have funny names and you cant see us!!
Ive seen ECT work really well in people with mental health problems ,nobody knows why it works but it does , As for being sectioned ,that isnt a bad thing ,at least people have recognised the severity of your dads problem and he will get the help he needs. It must be so hard for your mum though ,its easy to look after people when they are physically ill ,it brings out the florence nightingale in most of us and there are obvious practical things we can do to help ,much tougher with mental illness. Im sure your dad will get better with the right help

Hi folks,
skinnyj, you sound like you are already in a positive frame of mind about tackling the drinking about depression. The gym is a fantastic idea. not only will it be a diversion of your normal drinking time, the exercise will improve how you feel as well. It's a natural anti-depressant.

LIke JWFMT said, having someone close to you sectioned is devastating, but at least your dad will be in the right place and will be receiving treatment. I've seen positive results in really otherwise hopeless cases. Keep talking to us on here as well.

How's everyone else doing today?

Sorry, it's kokeshi again. I was feeling a wee bit insignificant with a 3 letter name. This is much grander

Hello everyone I have been directed to this thread after posting on a parenting issue! I think I have a problem with wine in particular. 3 years ago I used to drink 2 glasses on a Saturday and 2 glasses on a Sunday and that would be it. I now quite often drink a bottle a night. I have had relationship problems with my children's father but now I think the fact that I often drink so much is causing a problem in my personality. I dont really get hangovers as such usually feel fine after a red bull!! My life is a bit of a disaster zone right now ie. just found out my dp's other woman is expecting !! Not as broken up about it as people would expect but that is mainly due to the fact that I have been living with his infidelity for 3 years now and although I hate the idea of him having another child its life kinda!! I dont really want to get too much into that side of things. I want to talk about how I manage to stop drinking so much and other ways to deal with the crap that happens in life other than blotting it all out with wine! I have become a rather miserable person a snappy depressed mum and someone I hate to look at in the mirror - I havent mangaed to read all 26 pages of this thread but I will!

Hi unhappy, welcome to the thread. I think FioFio's idea of going to the GP is a good one, I would recommend this to anyone who is worried about their drinking. When you get into a pattern like this, it takes quite a lot of effort and support to get out of again, and sometimes the reasons that triggered our drinking just become obscured as we begin to get both psychologically and physically dependent on it. It's never easy to work out where this line is, but I think many of us have already crossed that line.

It depends on what you want to do for yourself. Is it interfering with other parts of your life? I think many of us start out with one idea of what we want and end up somewhere completely different. It's a process of trial and error I think, I've decided that I will never be able to go back to 'normal' drinking and hterefore need to confront the fact that I am an alcoholic. I did a lot of 'research' though and almost detroyed myself in the process. I wouldn't recommend it. I also found that once I stopped drinking, I had to find other ways to cope. I'm not naturally a person who wears their heart on their sleeve, I tend to put a mask on for the outside world whilst I'm in turmoil inside. I've had to learn how to open up to people and share about stuff that affects me.

I go to AA, and as such I employ a strategy of not drinking just for today. It horrified me to think that I may never drink again, so I just work on 24 hour increments. I haven't lifted a drink for sometime now, despite the fact I could never stay sober for any length of time before. There's more to it than that, but the whole point is that I've found a way for me that works.

There are lots of support services out there for you, just go and be honest!

Fio, you're always welcome on here. Thanks so much for being honest. Are you coming to any conclusions of your own? LOL at drinking like a fish, maybe so, but in this incarnation I get to swim around in a lovely ornamental pond meditating on lotus leaves

Hi ornamentalkoi (snappy name !) its so good to be able to come on here and talk . I managed last night free of the frol' . Feeling much better about life in general ,although have fallen out with my bathroom scales

hi fio and unhappy too

That's great you're feeling more positive JWFMT. When you stop drinking for a while, you realise just how bad it's been. I find for me, it has a knock-on effect on every other part of my life too. Everything just seems much easier.

Glad you like the new monicker, I hardly ever name change so it feels a bit weird.

I think because the wine made me feel so utterly pants yesterday morning ,i realised that id been drinking that quantity every night and not felt that bad in the morning ,ahich was a bit scary .
this is my only name change ,bit long winded though may downscale it any suggestions ?

cant believe you go to bed so late/early ,when do you have to get up again?