Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support Thread II?

[kokeshi]

Welcome to the thread, the purpose of this is to give anyone, who is having any trouble with their drinking, to come and post about it honestly and without judgement.

There are many of us that use the thread for support and encouragement: some in recovery, others just needing a place to share about their worries. It's been going on in one form of another for a while now and has helped many people.

Everybody's welcome, no matter what stage your drinking is at.

Jump right in, the water's fine

I can't remember if it was fisher price or v-tech that I was looking at now. I was really put off by the advert as it was being used by a child of about 2. I like the idea of him being able to chuck it and it still work though.

What is the picture quality like? I thought they were just for the novelty factor and was a bit shocked by the price - I think £58 was the cheapest price I could find for it, and IMO that's a bit of a piss-take if the quality is really dreadful. Obviously I don't care about it having a zoom or film feature - I just want it to be able to take reasonable quality pics, and I expect that for the price they're charging. The reviews were pretty bad though. I think the adverts are making it look more chunky and babyish because it looks so huge compared to the small child that's holding it.

Sorry, I'm ranting away on here because EX-P has had enough of me going on about it. Actually it quite pisses me off that present ideas and shopping are always left to me. I've virtually no idea about 'boys toys' like cars and action figures, so a camera seemed like a really good idea. I want to go and get it tomorrow when DS goes back to school and be organised for his BD next Friday.

I'm really irritated by this.

The pics are ok. Not amazing, but certaily good enough. And the camera has survived being dropped on a stony beach.

Rant away, I dont mind!

Thanks PC. DS is back at school tomorrow, so I'll go shopping and have a look at it.

I know why I'm being petty over this. I bought a budget digital camera last year after my old one got lost - it is totally crap and I resent buying an even crappier kids one that won't last development wise, but that I'm paying extra for just because it's so robust, when I'd be happily give him mine. I suggested wrapping that up for DS (I've still got the box and everything) and then getting him something else for his birthday. That is mean though, I know, and EX-P thought it was a crap idea.

They are both playing Star Wars now - one is a Jedi knight and has a broom, the other is Darth Vader and has a light sabre. The noise they are making is unreal. It's great to see DS laughing and playing but I wish EX-P would have the sense to play like this in his bedroom.

I dont think its a crap idea to give him your old camera - I think it is very sensibl! Then you could use the money you save on buying it to get him something else!

As for Star Wars... Can you go out while they play?

Umm, I could if I was dressed

DS is watching the Simpsons and EX-P is cooking dinner now, so I'll not bother

hehehehe

I think that sound's like a plan BM. You give him the digital camera, and task ex-p with finding another gift, if he's unagreeable to your suggestion. Sorted! When's his birthday?

News...hmm. Not so much yet, have been starting the New Year off by getting in touch with friends I'd neglected so that's a start! Also did a bit of paperwork today that I was behind on.

The Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama (RSAMD) have an academic who's interested in producing music for cochlear implant users and has organised a concert for the end of January. I'm really keen to go and hear it, it's definitely one thing I still really miss about not having my hearing anymore, it's wuite upsetting at times. Music is such an important part of creating memories I think, and I miss than. Not a huge deal I know but it would be great to have something I can make some sense of at least.

I'm getting back into my t'ai chi and meditation as well, it really helps to set me up for the day after doing a bit of reading. Small thing to make the day easier and more manageable.

Oh wow, that sounds great. Do you know how they might produce the music? Will this acedemic be producing new music or transforming existing music? I understand what you mean about the forming of memories thing. I can also change my emotions a bit when I listen to songs that really mean something.

EX-P has come up with spectacularly crap ideas for DS's present: more Nintendo Wii games or a new Gamecube (completely pointless seeing as you can play old Gamecube games on the Wii anyway). I'm not that hot on restricting video games, but I'm not going to let that be the only thing he's interested in. I think a camera would be a great idea because he can practice with it on his birthday (Friday 11th) and then use it at Star Wars on the Saturday, and then I thought we could make a photo album with his pics on the Sunday. I don't expect EX-P to get excited about it but some enthusiasm would be nice. It's hard enough to get 5 minutes to discuss anything with DS around (he's still awake, singing in his room now) and I was so pissed off that he kept sneaking off and turning the tv up.

Anyway, I've decided that he's having a camera whether EX-P can be arsed with it or not. I dont' see the point in chucking £20 down the drain for a Disney one when every review has given it less than 1 star, and I don't want to spend £60 on one that won't last him. So, unless a better option comes up before his birthday he can have my old one and I'll buy him a DVD or something.

Sorry, I know I have really gone on about this today I should have started a new thread, but I just wanted to sound off without having to justify myself.

DS is back to school tomorrow [yippee]

Good ideas all round BM - hope you get some peace today. I have to go back to hospital about my damn face. I am not happy about it.

Oh no PC. It's more serious than I gathered from your posts yesterday. I can't stand having burns, I don't think I'd cope too well with one on my face. I feel really sorry for you

What are the hospital doing? Changing dressings or something?

I'm off for a nap now. I got a grand total of 1 hour sleep last night, and DS managed 3. I was going to crawl into bed at 9.15 when I got back from the school run but I waited in case the school phoned to say he was too tired to be there. He knew I was cross with him this morning for not going to sleep and he was trying really hard to be jolly, but he was so obviously knackered. EX-P is collecting him from school and they are going for haircuts. We're going to have sandwiches in front of a DVD after that and I'm hoping he'll drop off so I can transfer him straight to bed. Luckily once he goes to sleep he does stay asleep.

How is everyone today?

Hello BM and K.

Sorry about your bad night last night. I hope a day back at school will help ds settle down tonight. But I know sleep is a problem for him (and thus you)

My face is still hurting, but trip to A&E was okay. I cant do links, but there is a thread in 'health' called somthin like 'burns - smelling'.

I've not drunk much this year. Okay, so it is only the 3rd Jan. But I want to tonight.

Hello everyone.
Is it ok if I join in? Tonight is my 3rd night of no alcohol and I'm alone at home with dd tonight as dh has gone out and that is always a trigger for me. I suffer from anxiety and drinking helps to get through it. So I could do with some company

Hi Scarlett - welcome. And WELL DONE for 3 nights without alcohol. There are some people on this thread with DAYS and MONTHS of abstinence who can guide you. I am not one of them, but I will happily chat to you!

PC
x

Thanks PC. I find the evenings really tough. Can't imagine having months of abstinence! Sorry to hear about your poor face - sounds terrifying

I too find the evenings tough. Come on here and distract yourself as much as you can. ~Thanks for your concern re my face. It was pretty horrific.

Hey ScarlettOHairy, cool name! Well done on 3 days, that's fab. What motivated you to stop? It does get so much easier by the way. Try not to think about the long term, just each day as it comes.

I've been doing this for a long time and I have quite a few sober days behind me now

Welcome!

PC, hope you get some relief from your burns.

thanks Kokeshi - my face is really hurting atm

Thanks PC and Kokeshi. I am just trying to get through this evening at the moment

I'm in therapy at the moment to beat the anxiety and I am determined. I just can't do that unless I face up to the fear and anxiety without numbing myself with alcohol. I have been drinking since I was 14 so almost 20 years. I did stop when I was pregnant, and that was fine, but the anxiety has only really started since dd was born (she's 3.5 now).

PaperChain - I didn't realise you were Losty - I am Footprints. I think we have bumped into each other in the past.

Am feeling really bad right now but I'm drinking a chamomile tea and then I will go to bed (we're an hour ahead of you here so it's not TOO early.

Oh scarlett/Footprints you poor thing. (remind me where you live?) Well done for making it 3 days. I am not drinking tonight. (My face hurts too much) My relationship with alcohol is a funny one. I can take it of leave it sometimes and then I go on a big binge and drink constantly for a couple of weeks. I too am in therapy. If you want to chat off board do CAT me, or we can chat more here

{{{{{}}}}}

Didn't drink last night so that's good I guess. But today I'm feeling so exhausted and depressed. Wondering whether it could be some kind of withdrawal thing. Just want to curl up and sleep forever. Hate feeling like this

HI Scarlett.
When I stopped drinking I had quite a lot of sleeping difficulties initially, and I know a lot of people do, so it may be that. I suppose it depends on the physical dependence level, and how much sleep you got last night. It IS good that you managed to not drink last night you know. Well done. All anyone has is the day in hand. Sometimes when the urge to drink is strong you get by in minutes. Have you got stuff you can plan to do, so you are not just sat thinking about drink?

How is everyone else today?

Hi everyone

I said I wouldn't post during the day today as I've got so much to do. I wanted to say hello to Scarlet and respond to the sleep thing though.

I had loads of sleep issues as well when I first stopped drinking. I think it was because I wasn't getting any quality sleep when I was drinking and I had a huge backlog of missed rest. I was passing out drunk most nights and waking really early because I needed a soft drink to hydrate myself. For the first week of abstinence I found it really hard to drop off and was in a kind of semi-conscious trance - it was awful.

I still don't sleep brilliantly but that's more to do with me delaying bed time, but it's much better now I'm off the booze. I had a slip over christmas and went straight back to that awful pattern of late night passing out and early morning waking for a drink.

Well done for doing 3 nights sober. Sorry to hear you're feeling down though. My emotions were all over the place in the early days too.

Well I drank far too much over new year and I don't really know why I bothered. We have seen my parents over the past couple of days, and I'm pleased that I didn't blot myself out completely. My dad is a nutter and thinks it's ok to tell everyone that my mum has dementia, but nobody must tell her. He did this to me too, many years ago, and told everyone that I had bulimia, but that I wasn't supposed to know. This was incredibly isolating, and absolutely ghastly for me. No wonder my relations gave me strange looks.

Anyway, my father accused me of opening his post to find out about my mum, then he said he had access to my health records . This is a pitiful attempt at bullying. I found the patient information leaflet about her drugs by our bed.

My father has always been a nutter and domestic violence has always been a problem. These days he seems to have less control over who he loses his temper with, or where he loses it. He is disintergrating in a really unpleasant way.

Morning folks.

Well done in staying sober on thursday night Scarlett. Howe did you get on last night? The first few weeks of coming off alcohol are quite rough physically and emotionally so do be kind to yourself. It does get better though! The first thing I think you'll realise is how much more energy you have, and people definitely remarked on the changes in my appearance.

I think it's important to replace the time you spent drinking with another activity, a hobby or interest perhaps? Do you have anything you enjoy doing that's been neglected recently? Keep posting and let us know how you get on day by day. I've also found it;s really important to share about my feelings, or else it will take me right back to suppressing them with alcohol.

Hi hellobello, good to see you, and sorry you're having a bad time with your family. Your Dad sounds really difficult. I think you should give yourself a lot of credit for surviving this kind of dysfunction. I think to a certain extent a lot of us still drag about stuff that our parents laid on us, it's hard to truly break away from it. I still have a strange relationship with my Dad, I feel like a total failure when I'm in his company and I never know what to say to him. He's made it pretty clear that I haven't reached my potential...barbed comments about how I should be living in a million dollar apartment in Manhattan by now (bizarre) and how I should be a consultant. Still gets to me after all this time...

Hi teasle, BM and PaperChain, Good to see all you guys posting and keeping the thread active.

Hi all - havent posted over Christmas as felt so guilty - spent most days using the fact that it was Christmas as an excuse to start having a drink around lunchtime and carrying on through the day, doesnt help that my family will quite happily do the same.

But I'm back adn pleased to report that January has so far been booze free. This is day 5 and the plan is to at least do a week, if not more......wish me luck. I havent had time to read all the posts yet so hope you are all doing ok and welcome to anyone new who has taken the plunge!