I am ill- ill enough that I can't lift my baby who has croup and is on steroids. DH has to go to work. What can I do?

[ArtistFormerlyKnownAsSOH]

Title says it all. My parents are in Greece, ILs are on a narrow boat somewhere. I can hardly breathe and certainly can't lift 19lb dd who is pretty bad with croup. No friends nearby who aren't working. Is there anything I can do? DD needs regular trips to the bathroom for steam which is making me faint.

There is no chance of dh's employers agreeing to time off.

But we cant get anyone round toyou, unless you tell us where you are? are you embarrassed to have someone at your house? if so, dont be!!!!!!!!!!!

just tell us where you are. would you like us to help you? we can you know

i would have thought that as a council employee your dh should have quite favourable absence policies, are you sure he understands that you CANNOT cope and are not just making a fuss?

i wouldnt panic about the ambulance, im sure if required you would be able to get one but hopefully that wont happen again! and worrying about that will make you feel worse.

Yes it's ShowOfHands incognito but craply! I cannot phone around. I kid you not, I have no voice at all. Pity any poor MNer that might end up round here, she'll be whispering about me a la 'she seemed normal enough but didn't say a word, just whipped her norks out periodically and pointed plaintively at the biscuits with a hungry yet thwarted look'.

OK, well if dh won't stay home and we can't come to you, perhaps I could put your mind at rest re the baby.

As I understand it:

a) the croup is being treated with steroids so they should be working by now

b) croup is always worse at night

c) when my youngest had it, I remember the GP telling me it rarely lasts more than a day or two. Maybe your dd is on the mend now?

I do agree with TMH that a bit of positive thinking goes a long way and if I were you, I would take some comfort from the above thoughts.

I really think that in such a serious situation your husband needs to stay at home with you and DD. You are both sick. If anything happened to either of you - would he be able to justify his decision to go to work. Come on this is serious.

Is work really more important than the two of you? I am racking my brains to think of an occupation that is SO important that an employee can't be away from work in a family emergency and I can't think of one - no matter if he only started the job recently - his family is sick and he needs to be home.

we all got Norks. where are you?

You need to tell us where you are, so someone can come round. I'm in the same place as Littlelapin (well not litteraly in her house) so can't do it, but there must be someone nearby.
Also, if you are really worried about your daughter, as you seem to be, get to hospital to get checked out

Don't worry, will be applying for a MNer should I find myself unable to nab a passing stranger to help me out for the day.

DH says that the council would not think this an emergency. How about a potential emergency that could cost him his frickin dd?

Where are you, please let us know. No one can help you if they do not know where you are. Do you have a humidifyer for DD?

I have been in a similar situ ASOH and no ambulance crew or casualty team will think you are over reacting if you get her into hospital, they always take you seriously with this, so my advice is to get her in and let them take over. If you're near me, I can bring a humidifier and a apnea alarm.

Let us plan for if you can not find a passer by to help

DD has viral croup and potential asthma. She is on steroids. We have to take her in/call an ambulance if she worsens but atm are medicating her at home.

showofhands am i right in thinking your in norwich?

Please please please, it is for yout little ones best. tell DH to sod the job

I was about to set off for Portsmouth for the day, but can just as easily drive to you. Do you have your DH's/ your mobile so I can text for directions if I need them? I have your address.

Just going to try my SIL. Don't worry yet, DH not at work till 1pm. Enough time to find cover for him I should imagine.

Yes, Salty keeps trying to move in, we had to change the locks

At least you still have your GSOH, SOH!

Where is your bathroom, is it upstairs? If your DH is bound and determined to go to work, can you make sure you have everything you need close to hand - bottles of water, some food etc - so you could basically just camp out in the bathroom if necessary?

Seriously, you DH has every right to request time off as you are too ill to care for your DD.
He really wont do that?

Sorry if this has already been suggested, but what about at least getting the GP out to see you and her? And then he/she may be able to put in place systems that help you out for the next few days? Surely that's at least worth your dh phoning the surgery for?

TYG thanks lovely lyrical Irish lady but I am contagious atm and you have A to think of.

I am in Norfolk, not far from Norwich and I promise I'll post as soon as all possibilities exhausted.

Outrageous your dh should drop everything and sod work!Your health and your babies is way more important.I am shocked tbh where are his priorities You don't sound like a paracetamol will do the trick here you need help sad0 for you xx

ASOH - please let everyone know how things are going. I was not trying to be an evil sod, but have been there and done than and had to manage.

DH eventually told work to sod off, we moved back to the N E to be nearer support. Our DS ended up in intensive care and it really put things in perspective for my workaholic honarable hubby. You can not replace family, but you can find alternative work.

he starts work at 1? so not vital he's there for the morning then? what department is so vital he has to be there at all?

Phoned GP at 8am- they are 'calling back'. 1hr 40mins and counting...

Your DH isn't going to get sacked for taking an afternoon off to look after his sick wife and child. Unless he's responsible for making the sun come up each morning, there's no job that can't survive without him!