The Back Pain Emporium, Internet Shopping, Drugs and Dealing with Doctors. Thread 6.

[MatildaTheRedNosedReinCat]

For anyone experiencing back pain it can be a very scary time. What is wrong? Who can help? How long will this last? We,on this thread are here to support you;offer empathy and help to navigate the almost impossible task of getting a diagnosis and the right treatment.We are not doctors but people who have trodden this path slowly and painfully. We also chat a LOT and welcome all newcomers. It is strictly non competetive regarding pain and no niggle is too minor.

Those who have long term back problems know that the best way to help manage back pain is to internet shop for shoes, bags, and back support devices. Those who are new to back pain, these are important lessons to learn. And here within this thread is where you will learn those lessons.

You will also find other helpful advice on pain management, different treatment options from hydrotherapy and physio to surgery, experiences of others navigating the big and scary medical world, both private and NHS (and abroad from the UK) too, as well as issues around work, being a parent while managing pain and disability, and the impact on the relationships around us. Not to mention the pain of dealing with claiming disablity benefits .

Between us all, we have a huge wealth of knowledge and experience, and more than the practical advice, the jargon and information, we know what back pain is like, how much is affects everything around us, and sometimes, all we need is to have people listen who Get It.

We talk painkillers regularly,sometimes drink wine , have hot water bottles and wheat bags galore, and hold hands a lot. It's potentially all very Unmumsnetty as we do actually show some lovin' from time to time, although we Never Ever call each other hun.

If you have advice, need advice, need a hand to hold, want to do some shopping, then come in. We are friendly. We talk a lot. Come in, have a brew and say hello

This is our 6th thread, here is the 5th, which has links too the others:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/a2203923-Back-Pain-and-Internet-Shopping-Thread-Number-5

Morning I haven't had chance to read all the messages yet, hope everyone iscoping ok.
I have the pip people coming on monday, I am not expecting anything though.
another little secret I have is that I am an emetophobe, go on say it, how do I manage in my job, care assistant. But dd had xmas party at school yesterday, nearly at home time one of the boys sitting a bit away from her was sick, now I am panicking she will get it, I hate this fear, any suggestions anyone.
I was told yesterday they were having to deep clean year two due to this awful fluey bug, high temp, nasty cough, bad throat etc, dd year five, she already has this and has done for a while, she had it wekks ago but as asthmatic the coughis still very loose and got muck, it seems to get bit better then come back, I was thinking of going ti gp, what are you thoughts on that.

ally F for Father Christmas, is what I have been assuming? Also, re: hijacking, please see my contributions about German TV, lawyers and pictures of lots of chocolate and poinsettias. I keep expecting to be told off So asking about a perfectly legit medical thing is, I think, well within the bounds of the thread!

pink Ooh, I am sorry. Can your other half deal with it if you ask?

frosty A nanny sounds excellent :) I am guessing the deleted posts referred to unwanted guests by Matilda's response? No is a complete sentence. Also, remember that they are (wild guess) German - they are used to people being a lot more blunt than in England (if DP's family are anything to go by) so they won't take offence. Also, assuming DH backs you up, please just get him to speak to whoever it is rather than feeling stressed yourself. Remember that if it wasn't for DD you would being frogmarched to a 4 week rehabilitation centre - you are still not well and need home comforts, plenty of rest and peace and, most importantly, your own familiar bathroom!

Hollie There is an excellent poster on the goldfish section of MN who is very knowledgeable. I forget her name But she always answers goldfish posts. I would say skip the walk and stay at home, then do as much of the present related stuff as you feel up to? Or anything that's child related. Adults do understand.

So today it's sunny and beautiful and we're meant to be on an afternoon train to Edinburgh to pick up MIL from the airport this evening, then nice hotel, then walk around tomorrow and come home. Also we are meant to be going for bacon sandwiches right now. I am sat in my PJs on the computer having woken up in a lot of pain. Even coughing hurts - it pulls on stuff that doesn't want to be pulled. So I probably definitely won't be going to Edinburgh, which saddens me as I was looking forward to it but also I don't think MIL will understand. However I can't think of anything I'd rather do less than spend two days in a drug induced stupor so that I can endure two long train journeys. So DP will be going by himself.

The past four months have taught me, beyond anything, that a) I am absolutely marrying the right chap and b) just to get mushy now we're near Christmas how much I love him, he does everything without complaining and I couldn't have coped so well without him.

matilda hopenthe patches are working ok? remember you need a day of between each patch. I am going to use one in a moment.

frosty hope you are recovering ok.

mags how is your DD? how is your wrist?

tins I am glad your friend is understanding and encouraging about the insurance claim. Because, you really do have to do this, you have been injured by someone's doing, purely by the other driver being drunk I would have considered that made him negligent regardless of the details of everything else. But you do need this to be picked up, as, depending on the outcome of MRI, who knows what will need to happen in terms of care and treatment. If you put in the claim related to friends insurance, will you be able to access private diagnostic treatment via that? I don't know it all works.

I am sorry if I have missed others out, I know I have and when I re-read I'll post again about it.

I have done almost all my christmas shopping. Well, actually I have done it all but I have to send a parcel to USA by courier, get that sorted, that's it. I have done some wrapping this morning, with DH and the children, for friends who we are seeing this afternoon.

And, now, I am lying on the sofa unable to move. I knew my back was going to go as I woke up with spasm in my back. I went to the bottom of the stairs to get something, my legs gave way and I was stuck! I now can't lean forward at all without screaming, or bending, twisting, can't get to the floor. I cried out in pain getting onto the sofa, and my back keeps giving way due to pain. Fuck. Fuck. I was about to make biscuits with the children, and need to have a bath and get dressed for two christmas drinks events today (2-5pm and 5-whenever pm). Front room is not look at christmassy as I would like as it's a mess and needs tidying, but that's gonna have to wait. Children are watching Malificent so they can help when they have finished watching it, I'll supervise. Taking stupid amounts of painkillers and 4mg of diazepam. it always happens at christmas.

Ooh and ally re: different pains... my back didn't really hurt at first, not the screaming agony it is now. Theory #1 is that I have further damaged it somehow by treating it as muscular pain only (as that is what GP told me to do) or #2 I am also, like you, wondering whether the brain can only deal with so much at once and given the broken rib (breathing was interesting!) and whiplash (couldn't move my head) plus assorted bruises, including a nasty clot in my nether regions where the lap seat belt was, maybe I just couldn't notice it properly until the rest had healed? Because it must have been there all the time but it certainly didn't feel as urgent as it does now.

pavlov :( (((hug))) is all I have to say to that. Can children make biscuits in the living room appropriately supervised as well? If they put a plastic sheet/old tablecloth on the floor and do it on that? Could be fun if they are not usually allowed to do cooking in the living room Or is that an insane idea from a childless woman? Please ditch one of those parties. It always happens at Christmas just because there's always more to do at Christmas, take it easy and be kind to yourself.

thanks tinsel F for Father Xmas of course silly me blooming heck. I got the right bloke too thank God - he does so much for me I'd be lost without his help

oh Pavlov that might the worst pain ever hope the drugs ease it off for you and don't you dare go to those events - its not worth it!

I was struggling to get a pair of silly tights on this morning (must be mega-lycra and for midgets as had to give up when couldn't get past my knees) and remembered telling a pal it took me 3 years to get my tights on ... I meant after op obviously but we laughed for ages (still am really!). The whole "getting dressed" thing can be hilarious right? I mean you take one leg off the floor and fall onto the bed so pants, socks, tights and the like are a major event ... I never mastered flicking things up from the floor with my toes but now I have the grabber thing there is no stopping me! It would make a great Youtube entry lol.

Sorry if that made anyone laugh when so many of you are sore!

I can pick things up with my toes

I have to go to these events. One is my BFF who has just moved house so it's a christmas/moving in gathering, and there will be people there who we will swap christmas presents with. DH is working this afternoon, as he swapped today with Monday so he can have DS while I am in London.

The other party is a friend from children's school whose friendship I really want to cultivate - both the children get on brilliantly with her children, the girls are the same age, same class, and so are the boys, and the parents are lovely. They make an effort with us and I can't make as much effort as I like because of my back being so shit, so I want to pop in to show I do give a shit. But, if I miss one, it will need to be that one I really don't want to today was the start of my christmas cheer, drinking Gluwein (sp) and eating mince pies with tinsel and fairy lights and music around me.

gonna try to get up and make biscuits. DH is in the bath trying to get rid of a hangover. He went out last night to start his christmas celebrations, otherwise he could do it with them. He is rotten. They keeps asking is it time...

Mulled, so sad you are suffering so acutely. Have you got a lumber support you can wear for this afternoon? I have recently started using mine again and it's very supportive even if it does make me look rather stout. Drugs, heat patch and a short time if possible. Trouble is we do still want to do our festive events especially when we do so much of the preparation for Christmas and missing out sucks.

Tins sorry you are suffering! too. Shame about the weekend but no, long train journeys walking around and getting tired and chilly are not good ideas. Will you watch the Strictly final with me instead? Anyone else?

I wasn't really sure if the lidocaine helped or not tbh. I was out at a friends house for the evening and certainly I coped quite well, but you do sometimes anyway. Patches say wear 12 hours max, doesn't mention alternate days. I will observe closely. One thing I like is that there are basically no reported side gaffe to so they feel very safe. Yesterday I actually put the Lidocaine on my skin and heat patch on my vest over the same spot.

Tomorrow we have a huge family lunch at a local smart hotel. It's a nice, if raucous event. Hoping for a reasonable day pain wise.

Pink, your dd is old enough to in a bucket or the loo. Make sure if she feels poorly she is close to such a thing at all times. Is the chest gunk green? Is she wheezy and needing more inhalers? If in doubt I would consult the pharmacist and use inhalers very regularly. Hope your back is ok.xx

Mulled, just remembered you've got your trip tomorrow . Go easy.xx

I will watch strictly with you Matilda - if I can stay awake that long lol

Have not read all posts since last so sorry if inappropriate but I have just one thing to say...

AAAHAHHHHHHHHHH!

The cake is great. Me and DD did a good job with the holly leaves. The empanadas (dd keeps calling them salamanders) are...ok but the recipe was wrong. It said it made 16 but I reckon that should have been 60! DD and I have given up (she gave me a stern pep talk about staying positive) and a very shocked and disapproving DS told me right off when I said oh fuck when my pastry ripped which made me giggle a lot and made it worse
DH has been fab and despite being in recovery from his party last night has cleaned a bit of the house and put up lots of lights.
I am lying down now as it hurts and seriously considering not going for the walk as whilst the walk would have hurt by the end I will be staring the walk hurting. Trouble is - I don't want to miss out... Have not been to the shop yet though...

Matilda I keep a bowl seperate which she knows as the sick bowl and she uses that, which I thrn ckean and bleach out after every use. The muck has been green but mostly yellow, the inhaler seems to loosen it more, I have had a break from going to the in laws every day to help mil out, alzheimers, as dh back to work, 4 on. I am working 23rd, xnad eve, bixing day, new years eve and day, well at least its double sone of the days.
My back is quite stiff today feeks more in the muscles and I do still keep getting that knotty pain in back of my thigh, think itd telling me that its still there and don't get too clever.
Have had dds friend in this morning, two doors up, but then her mum does have my dd as well, she is taking her to the local pub on the estate tomorrow for an xmas party, wr take it in turns to have the girls, she is the only one out of the kids that play that shares. The pub is nice its a sizzling pub and their food is lovely, not sure if any of you have them near you but they are very reasonable, and its mostly familys or the more mature as they come from the sheltered accommodation which is next door to pub, everyone is friendly.

Holly Congratulations on the cake!

Okay, I had a lie down and feel a bit better and tanked up on painkillers so feel bad about MIL (she really won't understand due to the language/culture barrier, she will think I hate her as she has a bit of a persecution complex) so am going to Edinburgh if DP can get us a lift to the train station. Am deffo not able to walk the hour there. Wish me luck. All I have left to do is wrap DP's presents and change everyone's beds to Christmas bed linen. And some cooking but DP will help with that.

Matilda I will watch the Strictly final with you! DP is going to leave me in the hotel whilst he picks her up. I had been going to watch Call the Midwife on demand whilst I wrapped his presents but as it will be hotel TV I will watch Strictly instead I have no idea who is on this year. Will take the rubbish tablet so I can post.

PS - poor DP... just remembered I needed to hide MIL's stocking and went upstairs to put it in the 'bits and bobs' drawer. There's another stocking in there, very carefully packed and hidden away I will pretend not to have seen it! Love Christmas - I like all the little secrets and glitter and making people happy and the food.

Hollie that is quite some list - I hope yiuvcan sack things from it.

mulled so sorry you're suffering. Did you go out in the end?

Matilda does one need to be measured for a lumber support belt?

Tins dunno if you went to Edinburgh or not but surely your MIL would happy to spend a day alone with her son? Maybe not.

I'm home. The drive was a bit uncomfortable but managed it. My mobility Is a lot better - I can move- but they didn't really give me a plan to get off the drugs. Surgeon rang me last night to see how I'm doing so I'll ask him at our meeting on Monday

Frosty, which drugs are you still on?

frosty, welcome home! Bet you are happy to be in your own bed. I was told to reduce the opiates first, start replacing doses with paracetamol, then reduce the nerve meds ( which I don't think you are on?) and finish by stopping the anti inflammatories. You can continue plain paracetamol as and when. I was told about three weeks from op to being off the painkillers. That might be optimistic but a guide.

Re lumber support, no measuring, just order S,M or L . I have something like
This Little Touch of Glamour

Needs must.

Off to Festive lunch with all inlaws. Toxic SIL is on her last chance. She is very, very close to being told precisely where to go? What's that MN expression, now??

cold the doctors letter recommends more than before the operation

diazepam 5mg at night
ibuprofen 600mg x 4
pantozol x 1 to protect stomach
tilidine 50mg x2 morning and evening

last night I took diazepam 2.5mg and slept through fine - did wake up with cramps though

so far I've had 2 Ibuprofen 600 today and no real pain as such - just exhausted. DH got out all the equipment and ingredients for porridge - I stood and stirred it as it cooked - ate it - then slept for 2.5 hours on the sofa. had lunch - going to try showering now.

matilda I am indeed able to make it up to my bed thank goodness. very slowly but it works

frosty I would do what the doctor days, at least for the first while.

ok now I am mad again about my NHS treatment - we had morphine (which we had to beg for) for 1 day then just paracetamol aarrgghhh

glad you have more frosty honest I am

on the plus side I am managing to poke a little solid food in - it hurts like hell but I can't take any more starving so must be a bit better

hope you all have a good day!

tins you have christmas bed linen wow, I never considered doing that!! That's one thing you could definitely have put on the back burner to keep your pain levels down.

Wait, the xmas bed linen is real?
Tins please confirm.

Matilda thanks for corset link and drugs tips. I think they could make the corset prettier for ladies.

festive yes I've taken most of it. Will ask at post opp debrief tomorrow.

frosty so glad you are back home and a little bit mobile. I would agree entirely with the doc advice for now, take all the meds you are told to take, it's very soon after surgery, so there is time to come off the meds when you are further into your rehab process.

I did indeed make both parties. Fucking stupid actually. First one was fine, I was plied with mulled wine, but think the alcohol was burned off as I drank tons of it and didn't get drunk and I had taken a shit ton of painkillers. All those people were my closest friends and they all know about my back shit, so I didn't feel too embarrassed standing/leaning on the side/attempting to sit badly occasionally. The second party was one of those where we were texted to see where we were several times, reminded that their children were really looking forward to seeing ours, and got the impression we were very much required, rather than a lot of people where going and we wouldn't be missed. They are really nice people, so we popped in for an hour, literally, but it was all I could do before I literally crawled into bed and popped more diazepam.

I cannot bend at all even sitting in the seat on the train to London, couldn't pick up the bag from the floor, even with the handle poking upwards, and DD had to take my boots, socks and trousers on and get my legs onto the bed this evening, after walking too much (not really even than much). I am doing my best to pretend it's not really hurting very much for DD, but then occasionally I get stuck and yelp so she has actually been 'looking after me'.

I am, however, in London nevertheless, with DD, had a lovely afternoon and evening after a mini crisis with hotel being cancelled due to a prob with the credit card used (exp date entered wrong, they didn't bother contacting me, just cancelled it), but it worked out well as we are in a lovely hotel which DD helped me pick just goes to show it can be done on the day - we literally called, they said come on over, and 10 mins later we were there. Seen christmas carols with proper church choir in St Martins in the Fields, some of it anyway as DD got bored, shame as it was beautiful.

But, it has taken it's toll, and I forgot my codiene and my diazepam. I have my tramadol, paracetamol, and naproxen, so will double dose the naproxen (of course I don't advocate that for others, but it works for me during acute phases), so hopefully that will ease things enough to sleep as I am in fucking agony now. I couldn't carry my electric heat wrap but I do have a stick on heat pad for the morning to use and I will ask the nurse at the pre-op appt to please, pretty please give me some diazepam to help me get home again.

Luckily, hospital is either 10 min walk max (maybe a but longer as I can barely walk right this second!) or 3 bus stops. I think the latter as I have enough on my oyster card still and bus goes right outside the hotel to as close as it possibly can to the hospital.