Back Pain and Internet Shopping. Thread Number 5.

[PavlovtheCat]

Those who have long term back problems know that the best way to help manage back pain is to internet shop for shoes, bags, and back support devices. Those who are new to back pain, these are important lessons to learn.

And here within this thread is where you will learn those lessons.

You will also find other helpful advice on pain management, different treatment options from hydrotherapy and physio to surgery, experiences of others navigating the big and scary medical world, both private and NHS (and abroad from the UK) too, as well as issues around work, being a parent while managing pain and disability, and the impact on the relationships around us.

Between us all, we have a huge wealth of knowledge and experience, and more than the practical advice, the jargon and information, we know what back pain is like, how much is affects everything around us, and sometimes, all we need is to have people listen who Get It.

We talk painkillers regularly, have hot water bottles and wheat bags galore, and hold hands a lot. It's potentially all very Unmumsnetty as we do actually show some lovin' from time to time, although we Never Ever call each other hun.

If you have advice, need advice, need a hand to hold, want to do some shopping, then come in. We are friendly. We talk a lot. Come in, have a and say hello

You will see just how much we do talk if you read our previous threads (where you may glean lots of answers about pain relief, surgery etc, best winter boots etc):
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/2049637-Back-Again-Back-Pain-Support-Thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/1871592-The-Back-Story
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/1992406-The-Back-Story-Continues
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/2023274-More-Terrible-Back-Stories

Denial The Rat got shut out with an ingenious chicken wire plug pushed down the hole.

I'm not hyper Magso I'm a lazy arse.
Today I must clean the conservatory (but it's too cold)
Plan a music lesson about rivers. (not sure what instruments we have and if there enough to share between both classes)
Enter some assessments. (new system never used it before)
Do about a year's filing (I just chuck it all in a box under the desk but now it's full)
Go to the Post Office.( I can do that!)
Walk the dog.
Make Christmas cake (wasn't going to as I will literally eat the whole thing - but I love it)
Check that my Maths group have done their online homework and report any miscreants.
That will do I think. I hate having jobs on a list I know I will not tick off. Anything else can be a bonus. How many out of 8 do you reckon I will do?

Matilda It's horrid the way that the whole world gets smaller but get you going to balls? What will you wear and does it have to be two different frocks? Shall I send The Rat down to be your coachman?
I've heard a lot about Silverline friends this week. They ring up old people who never get to speak to anyone and befriend them. Don't know if that's your cup of tea but it's something you could do from the sofa! What is your days to day mobility like? Can you get out and about? (sorry for not remembering)

Matilda Berrie - my friends are mostly younger and work full-time so no wouldn't have lots to do other than housey, shopping stuff. I am currently an admin assistant with little to do in a place which doesn't value me with people I don't like though so being lonely doesn't seem too bad. If I am lonely I will do voluntary work, just a few hours here and there for people who appreciate me and make me feel good. I only work 16 hours anyway so not a huge difference. I've volunteered before and its ver rewarding.

Thats the plan anyway!

Pavlov I did forget my age the other night and lay in bed for ages trying to decide if I was still 56 or had moved on to 57 yet ... geez!

Everyone seems to be a bit better - long may it continue!

It's horrid not being valued Ally Do you think it goes with being part time? I don't feel valued either. Go for it if that's the way that you feel. Start a new chapter!

Oh but I am a good Berrie!
I have planned the music lesson (sort of)
I have looked at the maths homework and dobbed in those who haven't done it.
I have tried to do the assessment but I can't - will have to ask.
I have sorted through THE BLACK BOX OF FILING DOOM! (I can't face trying to now file it in the filing cabinet...it will not fit...
Methinks I need a little lie down with my book.

I don't think so berrie as the other girl they treat like that is full-time. They have had bad staff in the past but we've been here for years now and still not trusted or valued. If it wasn't for her I'd have left years ago.

Can't wait to start a new life now I've decided - hope I don't chicken out.

Wow pavlov that is a lot of activity. I forgot my age this week, telling a clinic assistant I was 38 on the phone and only realising when DH gave me a funny look. Had to correct myself and say sorry I am very confused. V. Impressed at Matilda's two balls. Do you know the venue? Is there a chaise longue you can recline on at any point?

cold the physio is 6 minutes walk from my house which is embarrassing. Maybe if I shove in tilidin, diazepam at the same time I'll make it. The orthoped just called though and they've signed off home physio visits -woohoo! and I think crutches. DH will go pick up the paperwork on his way home. MIL is coming today so I'll be getting warm food. Although being reliant on DH for food has caused a 3kg weight loss in 2 weeks.

insel sorry if I missed it but what's the latest in your getting a scan?

Oh and remind to ignore DH who is never sick and refuses to even take a headache tablet. He was going on about the addictive qualities of diazepam so I didn't take the half tablet before sleep last night (I'm allowed 5mg but try and manage on 2.5) and woke up unbelievably stiff and in pain. Maybe not a direct correlation but ignoring his anti medicine pressure from now on.

Just seen they are 10mg tablets but anyway. And to bring this spouting on to conclusion - my GP told DH we have to look what's going on in my soul as this often causes the physical illness. I'm surrounded by German hippies. But maybe there is something in it. What do you all think?

freedom I do think there is a psychological link to back pain but I don't believe it makes you completely physically immobile! Anyway when you are in the state that you are currently in of course your head is going to be in a mess. Bit of a chicken and egg situation I think.
I do think it is useful to try and stay positive and believe that you are going to get better but in some ways that comes with experience of getting better in the past. I don't know how you conjure those feelings on demand when you are feeling that your life is over and you will never walk again! Having said that I am a glass half empty in a cracked glass of sour milk with a fly floating in it type of person. Pavlov on the other hand can probably do it better than me!while rewiring the house and laying a carpet.

Excellent work, Berrie. You have earned a lie down. Ally, I,motto worked 16 hours plus another day volunteering.mthe rest of the time was crazy busy but often with nice stuff.mimo it's easy to fill the days but not so easy to feel useful. I am lucky, though in having quite a lot of friends who are either part time or not working so can fill my days. And my days have to be punctuated with rests and wasting time on here.

Re The Big Ball Week. Good news no 1 is that I can wear the same frock twice. Good news no 2 is that I can still squeeze into it is a slightly 20s cocktail dress though more 60s in length. Will wear will only bearable heels which is a wedge mock suede boot so need highest possible denier tights to cover the legs.

Nb. Now much later, had to go out mid post. Tights and sparkly necklace purchased. Will dig out old but almost unworn evening jacket and am good to go. With drugs. May do some dealing in the ladies

Matilda am disappointed. I wanted you to be wearing a Cinderella dress though it does sound very nice and...short?

freedom, I'm sure there are millions of words written about pain and the mind. Does that mean that a good strong person can deal with their pains and get on with it? Maybe but sadly not for me and I very much dislike the implication that if only I had been more positive / had some spirit, I would be just fine.

When I was a midwife, there were definite racial stereotypes though and German, Dutch and Scandinavians didn't often seem to be having epidurals or even pethidine much. They either felt less pain or were more accepting of it.

The bottom line is that pain is in your head which makes it so totally confusing.

Berrie, not to fear, its not that short but well above the knee. I'm an apple so have quite slim legs and an apple shaped torso.

at dealing in the ladies at the ball!

I think I prefer to say pain is processed in the brain, Matilda. Although where reflex reactions to painful stimuli fit in I'm not sure. I do think long term pain can sort of leave you over -or even under sensitive. Your outfit sounds very posh. I hope you have a lovely two evenings- and the fun carries you through whatever payback there is.
Berrie I used the wrong word - I think busy would have been better- and you certainly sound busy enough to need a long rest! There used to be a piece of music called on the river, but the details will not come to me - only that I liked it as a child. I like tick lists too. However I cheat a bit and break things down into steps (do that for ds so its ingrained) so it feels like I have done quite a lot. This is also because I have an unreliable memory so essentials have to be written down. I am sadly not particularly busy or hyperactive - its been hard (and taken years of enforcement) learning to slow down (and pace) and I still get it wrong a lot of the time.
I have had a nice day attending a singing workshop with other parents of children with sn/asd. Its an excuse to relax really. It was fun and we got to chat. I wasn't the only one needing to sit/perch to accommodate various ills, it seems dastardly backs are a common problem for parents. Stopped at some shops on the way home to buy hamster bedding, (and human food) so stopped to watch the most manic animals degus-(large cute rat like animals) I've ever seen. 3 youngsters in a cage together were all on the wheel together! It made me laugh! Obviously no adults to tell them to take turns!

Matilda yes, I feel a bit pressured by DH chin up, it's not that bad, you don't needs these drugs, try a herbal tea attitude. Well hopefully soon I won't but right now I do - because I can't leave the house and on bad days can't sodding walk. I can manage to partially release muscles I feel tensing up with my mind sometimes but stopping a disc pressing on my nerve- not so much. Ok moan over. Good to get it out here. Thank you.

magso ha ha at animals all on wheel together

Good question freedom because I HAVE A SCAN!!!!!!! NHS letter was waiting for me when I got home last night. Booked for 23rd December. I can't believe it, I really can't. I was in there this morning to get my leg x rayed don't climb on coffee tables when under the influence and they are a bloody miserable bunch, it wasn't just the woman on the phone on Friday who made me cry it is all of them. For example today has been bad pain-wise (payback from yesterday) so I explained that I couldn't sit the way she wanted me too as I was in so much pain. Her response was just "don't move" and she walked off leaving me gritting my teeth, not quite in agony. So I fully expect the scan to be awful but I am so pleased it is soon :)

freedom I am sorry you are surrounded by German hippies. I have had a bit of that from DP. He is not happy with anything that I am taking and has said a couple of times he thinks I am over egging it. I tried a day without painkillers and ended up making his life a misery so he keeps schtum now!

I agree - purely based on friends' birth stories - that pain has a large mental element to it. I think if I wasn't at work I would find this much harder as although I'm knackered I know I can do as much as I'm able, take what rest I need and it's an amazing distraction. It is mostly only when i concentrate on the pain that it feels worse. However I have a deep seated fear of injury to my leg following a nasty break as a child and scremed for no reason when the doctor was examining it before recommending the x ray - she hadn't actually touched a bit that hurt, but I was expecting it to and had to think for a second before apologising that one was in my head!

Sorry, woman on Monday who made me cry - I blame the drugs.

Magso, I saw some of those animals big ugly rats at Pets at. Home the other day. They, too were manic. berrie why not replace your lost friends?

Pain is so bizarre, hence my hatred of questionnaires expecting neat little answers. I cannot stand my left shin to be touched. There is nothing wrong with my left shin. I will share with you that my father in law loves to hug and squeeze everyone and I feel the pain before he even touches me.

I wonder if it is fear that makes them (degues) so manic? Flight reflex? I was careful to laugh quietly. Our hammy seemed manic when he first came home but he has calmed down now - he has also got rather fat!

Inselaffe that is great news. I am very happy for you. Sorry you had to deal with miserable people and a bad pain day. Here's hoping tomorrow is better. I've never screamed in anticipation of being touched. But I do a nice knee jerk in the reflex test before the hammer has even fallen. Every time.

I am very tempted to buy a hamster for DS.
Father Christmas bought me my first hamster. Trouble is I think the dog would jump at the cage and eat it. He could keep it in his room as the dog doesn't go upstairs but I have terrible memories of noisy hamsters keeping me awake and of them constantly escaping...

I wonder if a pet rodent would scare off the wild ones Berrie- I suspect not. I had no say in the hamsters arrival, (Ds and DH just came home with it and all the kit) but will admit to being rather fond of him now. He is kept upstairs in the tiny annex to Ds bedroom - the only disadvantage being the bits of bedding and wood shavings getting all over the house- on ds feet! And the vacuum doesn't seem to like them either as it refuses to pick them up. Ds is learning to be gentle and its nice that Hammy likes ds company, and he (hammy) is asleep most of the school day, so I can just leave him to snooze. A pet rat (or wild) might need company.
Went to a yoga based class today, doing what I could despite sore back and injured wrist. Am now rather sore and stiff. Odd how exercise does that. 4 days to back physio appointment. Our car is back all shiny and scratch free.
I don't think I have ever noticed pain before I am touched, but ds coming full speed at me certainly makes me brace for impact. Also that dread as a sneeze is about to happen! I'm the opposite Freedom - I somehow can inhibit the knee jerk through being too tense.
How are all the kitchens going (Matilda, Pavlov and Berries rat repelling tacts?).
Inselaffe great your MRI is booked at last, although sorry its still a 3 weeks wait. Pavlov I hope you are trying to be good and not too busy decorating/cleaning/working/present wrapping/filling the freezer and preparing for H-day.
Freedom, hope you are getting well looked after and fed now your PIL are back. Dh is a stiff upper lip type so also minimises all ills - especially mine. He has softened a bit in recent years. Its hard isn't it. Hippy German doctors - that sounds a contradiction in terms!

V. Impressed at Matilda's two balls this just made me snort into my drink