Back Pain and Internet Shopping. Thread Number 5.

[PavlovtheCat]

Those who have long term back problems know that the best way to help manage back pain is to internet shop for shoes, bags, and back support devices. Those who are new to back pain, these are important lessons to learn.

And here within this thread is where you will learn those lessons.

You will also find other helpful advice on pain management, different treatment options from hydrotherapy and physio to surgery, experiences of others navigating the big and scary medical world, both private and NHS (and abroad from the UK) too, as well as issues around work, being a parent while managing pain and disability, and the impact on the relationships around us.

Between us all, we have a huge wealth of knowledge and experience, and more than the practical advice, the jargon and information, we know what back pain is like, how much is affects everything around us, and sometimes, all we need is to have people listen who Get It.

We talk painkillers regularly, have hot water bottles and wheat bags galore, and hold hands a lot. It's potentially all very Unmumsnetty as we do actually show some lovin' from time to time, although we Never Ever call each other hun.

If you have advice, need advice, need a hand to hold, want to do some shopping, then come in. We are friendly. We talk a lot. Come in, have a and say hello

You will see just how much we do talk if you read our previous threads (where you may glean lots of answers about pain relief, surgery etc, best winter boots etc):
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/2049637-Back-Again-Back-Pain-Support-Thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/1871592-The-Back-Story
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/1992406-The-Back-Story-Continues
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/2023274-More-Terrible-Back-Stories

I credit the codeine. I like TInselaffe simple yet effective. Bugger this I want to go for a run just when I think I have accepted the long termness of this shit it throws me a curveball.

I am and envious of plug in heated seat covers for £11. I am so going to buy one of those.

I need to take a leaf out of ds's book. Cheerfully playing on his Wii, pausing to lean over his sicck bucket then continuing his game . he's at the dry wretching stage ugghh

Cross-posts. Yes, TInselaffe is the result of Tramadol - it's the first year in five on MN that I have been able to come up with a festive namechange

I know how you feel, re: running. After years of loathing exercise I had just got to like it - I did the 5k muddy run in a personal best in June. I haven't cancelled my gym membership yet as I keep telling myself I'm going back tomorrow, and then tomorrow and then maybe next week. How about swimming? I am thinking (if I can somehow work out how to shave my legs!) about going for a gentle swim with all the pensioners in the middle of the day when it's quiet as the gym also has a small pool.

Morning ladies, I've had a splendid stroll in the sun. Stupid cupboard clearance of yesterday has left me in pain but not as badly as I feared. Do have to go into town for a bit because it's the only day my friend can take me, then onto the car dealership. The good thing about Motorbility is that they deal with all servicing, repairs and everything except petrol basically so no concerns about cost of parts etc. the car doesn't belong to you, it's like leasing but better terms. Agree that having driven an auto for several years now I can't see the point in manual cars but that's just a matter of preference .

frosty, don't feel pressured into rushing in if you are unsure or want to speak to another doctor. If they have such good availability they will be able to fit you in again when you decide. Must admit I was a little surprised to see you mention total discectomy and fusion. That's a much bigger operation. My understanding is that usually you would have a micro discectomy ( taking away the bulging section of the disc) plus laminectomy if needed ( opening up thy bony channel which the exiting nerve root passes through). This is usually enough to decompress the nerves and reduce the pain. I would have thought they would do that first and only resort to full discectomy and fusion if the first op was unsuccessful. It would need a lot of discussions fusion is now quite 'out of fashion' in the uk and USA due to it's dubious success rates. ( got all that from expert witness neuro at my legal conference). It is very hard to speak up for yourself in these situations, though. Are you bilingual? If not you really need a good interpreter. I do feel for you, your head must be all over the place .

denial, how about No More Denial... not very festive but more upbeat. Sorry about your pain and hope it's just a glitch.

pavlov, I really like the advice, what would you advise yourself? It's so hard for you but it is only a few days and the children will be fine. If you leave them all behind I will visit you (bad luck!). Do you have family in London? Don't worry, it will work out.

Tins so glad you are resting and nurturing yourself. Yes, you have an injury, as yet still Undiagnosed, not general backpain ie sore from too much gardening. Sadly you do seem to have been overlooked as the victim of an RTA. Regarding legal stuff, it would be hard to involve your friend but...this injury could leave you with long term pain and have serious impact on you. It is not personal and I would hope you and your friend could agree that. You deserve compensation for your pain and losses. It takes a veeerrrry long time so I would recommend to talk to the lawyers and let them decide if there is a case and deal with it. With Conditional Fee Agreements (no win no fee) they will only ever proceed if there is a better than 50% chance of winning otherwise they risk working for nothing.

Waves to mags, thinking of you with your poor wrist as well as your back and other health issues. You are very stoic and unmoany unlike me. Do you get much help with ds? It must be difficult to cope with it all.

So this thread is nearly full. Any volunteers to create a new one? If not I will cobble something together later. I rather like the shopping element. That and Don't Necessarily Accept Your Doctor's Advice. And my favourite expression which is, Back Pain Is Not A Diagnosis.

Need to move and brave the town, wish me luck. See you later

I swim a lot. I started just making myself go three times a week and get in the pool for 15 minutes now I can swim for twenty minutes half an hour fairly continuously. I never feel better than just after a swim. We live in the sticks though and I don't like driving on painkillers so I shall try a slow shuffle out onto the common I think when dp has lunch and take over childcare duties for a bit.

I had just got to week 3/4 of c25k and was really enjoying it and all the lovely shiny bits and pieces I could justify buying I'm hoping that this flare up is my body fighting off the kids bug and is very very temporary

Crikey, HUGE cross posts, I'm a slow typist! festive hope fab name. Chuckling at ds chucking up and carrying on with his wii

Hollie, I'm cross you have to miss Christmas dinner on Sunday. Come on girls, let's find a solution.. send dog to rspca and collect later

Matilda exactly. The nurse just said he's not going to stop, wake you up and ask if more than a discectomy is ok if he gets in there and one is needed. Too blase for my liking. I'm going to ask to speak to him directly later. Phones off 13:00-15:00

Tinsel and festive good ideas - must stay calm and not let myself be pressured.

DH has organised his friend from work to come and meet the dog. He has offered to take him for a walk on Sunday but...I'm not sure that is a terribly good idea
Either that or I'll drop him at yours Friday night Matilda . New kitchen you say? How would you like one with chewed door, skirting board and door frames?

Berrie I would let him do it, how bad can it be??

Got ready to go for a walk and it started sleeting grrrrr

Sorry I wasn't clear - I'm definitely going to let him come and give the dog some company - let him out for a wee and a woofaround the garden. If he wants to take my mental dog for a walk he can. I'm worried for him not the dog!

Off for a walk now - earlier - in the hope of avoiding new dog and yappy dog. In my NEW WELLIES!

frosty on your behalf. I would be using what that nurse has said as a very valid reason for being able to withdraw your consent if you want at any point.

Might be worth explicitly, word for word documenting what you give consent for, for your own understanding so you can look at it later? And getting a photocopy of it so that nothing gets lost in translation. I would also be asking for a translator - they must have one - as I would never rely on my DP to translate something this serious for me as although he is good he is not

I know everything feels very quick and fast and like you need to make a decision now but you totally don't. There are many, many hours left before the end of the week and if you were in the UK you would be on a many weeks waiting list so you would feel like you had more time to mull this over... it's just that the German system is too quick for our English brains

Berrie When I was a teenager I had a rabbit who used to chew the skirting boards And pee up the wall It was a good thing he was so cute!

Sorry frosty didn't finish the sentence - he's not a professional medical translator.

Don't remember who it was who wanted me to interrogate DH about what the Doctor said about toes but he said the GP had said he thought they could do joint replacement now so an element of doubt there I think...

Sorry for not being able to remember who people are. I do struggle with names anyway (big drawback as a teacher) I am all at festive sea now!

Oh just googled big toe joint replacement and it is a thing!

Big toe joint replacement is a thing? Wow. Sometimes I do love modern medicine

Have just spoken to Benenden. The funds they authorised for my scans can be used for a consultant if the waiting list is too long. So I will ask the GP for a referral letter and also for the waiting list time. I have also emailed my MP to ask what on earth I have to do to get non-conflicting opinions and an actual diagnosis (my DFather's suggestion). Spoke to my boss. He was okay but not really happy that it's so up in the air. He asked me what the plan was... I said well there is no plan because I have no idea what is going on or who to speak to any more.

Still sitting on the sofa in my PJs in DP's office. He keeps the heating on in here so it's nice and snuggly. Good news of the day is that a present I bought for DSis four (!) weeks ago arrived today. I had already queried it once and then threatened to pursue a refund if it didn't arrive by today. They refunded me on Monday without comment but the postmark is also Monday. Not sure whether to contact them and offer payment back (honest TInsel - this is what I am inclined to do) or assume they were doing a gesture of goodwill by refunding and posting on the same day (this would be my DP's preferred option... suspect they are not as they are a small business selling via NotOnTheHighStreet and it cost £17). Might start an AIBU as I'm a bit bored...

Tinsle Did the rabbit live indoors?
Shudders at the memory of small furry creature piss in the kitchen.

Re parcel I would worry about the karma unless it was Amazon

I'm getting a bit confused by the seasonal changes too, but then I am easily confused. Its Magso in her festive wise man guise). Sorry your back has relapsed Festive- I hope it is temporary - well as temporary as could be.
We are lucky Matilda we get overnight respite (18 a year) and a couple of hours DP a week for in house support. It took a decade and near fatal illness to get support but life is so much easier now! The wrist is improving, despite ds finding it very hard to leave it alone (he forgets I am delicate in places!).
Just got back from ds school play, put on by the year 7s and written by a year 11 child- Its a special school, so writing a play is quite amazing. It was a curious mix of nativity and teenage craziness, mostly the latter- very Lloyd Webber! School has nice new chairs - much better than the old ones, so I have survived well.
See you on the new thread!

Hello. Right. Today's lesson learnt is never ask the doctors assistant questions about your surgery. Ask the surgeon. I told him the nurse had said there was no way to tell if I would need fusion or not or if he would remove the whole disc, and if so would he put a prothese in and I could hear him sighing. He said please ignore drs assistant they have a vague clue but aren't really equipped to discuss my plannedoperation. He intends to do a microdiscectomy. He wants to touch as little as possible which is why it's done under microscope. Feel relieved.

Berrie Yes, I have predictably received a roasting on AIBU for even daring to think about keeping both the money and bag I will contact them.

Rabbit lived outdoors with his brother but we brought him inside every day for a cuddle. I did train them to go in a litter box by the back door but for some reason they loved the wallpaper and skirting boards there (only there... nowhere else) and would scratch the boards, tear/eat the paper and periodically piss up the wall. You'd be surprised how high they can wee! Floor was lino and my DM loves bleach so it wasn't as bad as it sounds but she did hate the wall habit.

How do you train a rabbit? can't even train bastard dog

tough yes I am! he is cutting me open and whipping out some bone at two levels (l5/s1 L4/L5) at the beginning of january He's in my my little black of of 'good' hcp not the other book. For now.

How are you? What have you been doing that has left you so quiet? Are you managing ok? And, are you enjoying the festive season?

denial it's not me that is concerned about DH being there with me in London, it's him he is worried that something might go wrong and he might be needed there with me, and doesn't want me there on my own. We will try and get friend to look after the children, if not, he'll have to stay here with them. I am more worried about them than me, I have said I'll be not up for talking/visitors for very long on day of surgery, so he'll only be with me hour max. I think I will be happiest if I go down there on my own, and we get someone to have the children on thursday/friday and he comes up on Thursday to visit and bring me home on the friday. It also means, if for some reason I am in longer than planned, he is not up in London stuck, and the children stuck with someone, or huge expense for him to come back again. This is the best way that I can see. No point him being around for the checking in and boring prep stuff prior to surgery etc. I did that on my own last time and it was fine without him fussing around me . School have said they will be happy for the children to take 2-3 days from school if necessary so he could bring them up on Thursday/Friday if we have no-one, but DH won't have that, he says it will make things complicated and more stressful than they need to be, he is probably right.

So, so much pain I did too much. again. Which was to help out at school christmas lunch. All it involved was standing/sitting as required to hand out cartons of drink for the children, helping them scrape their waste oh so much waste and stack the plates, then have a plate of food and mince pies myself with the other volunteers, chatted for a bit with others, came home with the children. I didn't do anything else and I am in agony. I have tidied the front room since I got back, despite the pain as we are putting the tree up, except I am not doing that. I absolutely am done.

Tomorrow is the christmas nativity again, and I am going again. I know I shouldn't go again, but it's DS's first ever nativity, and this is the 'real thing' not the dress rehearsal. I can't let him down, he is too young to realise why I am not there when he says his lines, even if I tell him beforehand. Then it's school disco, Dh will have to do that for both of them this time, I can't do any more.

Friday, nothing. Not a single, tinsy, winsey thing. And tomorrow, bed most of the day until 1pm.