Yesterday, I found out that ... and I'm scared.

[GoodnessKnows]

I will be brief as I feel like I've entered a time warp where my brain has frozen, incapable of long sentences:
Had hip pain and have been waking at 3am most nights with back pain (not terrible) for about 1-2 years.
Thought I needed a firmer mattress.
Finally went to consultant.
Two MRIs and an X-ray later, I was ushered into a private room having just been told that a large tumor is at the base of my spine.
They called me back in within one working day of the second MRI.
I'm now waiting for a biopsy which will be on Wednesday or Saturday of next week - to determine its 'nature'.
Scared
Shocked
There was talk of chronic bone erosion in the lower back as a result of this thing. Also discussion of nerve paths and tumors, rare cases and cups of tea.
Now, lying awake as usual in mild discomfort, I'm in utter shock and disbelief.

Tough day yesterday and DH going away to India for 'my last week' before The Op. I'll PM you, Rosa feeling low.

Give medical calls to take / make today. As if I've nothing else to do! I'm overwhelmed! My life was going so well

I hope things are better today.

I've been lurking since early on but didn't have any real advice. Just wanted to hand hold and wish you well.

Feeling low. DS being Right Royal fucking pain. Behaviour off the wall ... and I so neeeed him to be good. Doing everything I possibly can to help him to be but he's sensitive n is bound to be picking up on all this. Feeling low.

Goodness I have lurked as well and not really known what to say.

I'm so sorry you're going through this.

How old is your DS?

hospitals usually make arrangements for home care when you are discharged - is this system the same everywhere?

Evening Goodness. I was around in December and then lost you. Hand holding is all I can do I'm afraid. Maybe offering some more sand to make sure you don't have to come up too often?xx

He is 6 (just )
and I'm holding all glands offered. They're keeping me from falling in a scary hole ;)
Thank you

My hand is still here too xx

Squeezing tightly.

Ouch!!

thinking about you

Bloody hell, I can't believe I missed this thread, it's so similar to mine here.
I was supposed to see the consultant on Christmas Eve, I'm so lucky the clinic was cancelled and my Christmas wasn't ruined, like yours.
All the very best OP.

Thank you for thinking of me.
I'm going to read it now!!!

Hand holding here too.

Thank you ancient. Things have become very quiet since the last of the diagnostic tests, pre ops, visits to consultants and surgeons were made. Until Wednesday it's been almost daily with visits, tests and calls
Now it's quiet.
But my DS is ensuring that it's stressful and that I'm distracted while waiting. Holy cow, he's doing a fantastic job of that!

It's uncanny how they pick it up...

When does your Oh get back? And what three cherishing things are you going to do for yourself before you go in?

Eg a bath with a glass of wine, a half hour with a kindle, and that last chocolate? Or buy a new nightie to be brought in for afterwards or new slippers?

Goodness, just wishing you all the best for the weekend, and hand holding!

Thinking of you as well goodness . It's so horrible to be in a situation where you have minimal symptoms and have to have major surgery which will take serious time to recover from .

Don't take anything too new or special into hospital - I had to throw stuff away afterwards as it took me back to how I felt before I went in .

Head in sand girl and focus on how surreal it is and how it feels like you're someone else going through it .

And let the little ones watch too much TV ... and eat too many biscuits ?

Where are you having the op, Stanmore or the Wellington?

A reply to you all (how DO you all remember who write what?!):
I'm giving to have an Indian head massage on Monday. Luxury known only to me on my hen day!
Children do puck up on things but his behaviour us ridiculously bad for him. I understand why (maybe) but it's v worrying when I'll not be here to deal with it or support/ inform the school.
RNOH Stanmore
Definitely more TV and biscuits! Lol

I'm glad to hear you're going to RNOH, it's the place to be in your neck of the woods.
I did my orthopaedic nursing course there (many years ago), they really are a centre of excellence despite being in the middle of no where.

Yup
Looks like the place has been constructed by the flipping Wombles!
DH home
Thank The Lord!

Just read all if this. Good luck Goodness, will be thinking of you next week.