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[Gigondas]

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Nope, definitely no saint here!! Not much actual teaching as such either (this is often an area of confusion about home ed) -and definitely no schooling (which is a partic annoying imo americanism). If you take an autonomous aka child-led approach then you have lots of 'meaningful conversation' (often at very unsocial hours - I knew all those night shifts had a point other than to pay the mortgage!) and the home ed parent sort of facilitates educational experiences. On an ideal day this might involve taking the boy to a museum or library or some art class or sports centre, handing him over to a resp adult, and heading for the nearest cafe. Of course autonomy means there is room for gaps to develop, esp with a young person who hasa narrow range of focus, which is how we've ended up witha 14 yo who doesn't write much etc., who would be regarded as quite far 'behind' in many areas and quite geeky. But I'm really not sure he'd have done much better in the system, and no doubt he'd have been much less happy. I will never forget the raw fear of lying on his bed at night, when he was 5 or 6, and listening to him say he wished he was dead - because he hated school so much, and he knew nobody 'got' him, but till he was dx with his AS condition none of us had a real understanding of why he was such a little misfit. This wouldn't happen now, I think, though he'd still not exactly have a peer group at the local high school. It's funny dh, who btw is an ex teacher, was very against this little venture (but I don't think he took the school anxiety very seriously either, or was very aware). Yet now I'm the one who has had enough of HE and is looking at the options for ds4 to go back 'in', and dh thinks it's been a success and wants to continue. Oh well something will work itself out, I suppose.

Once again, sorry my posts are so long. I suppose worrying about the boy's education is a change from worrying about my reduced career options and my imminent collapse into liver cirrhosis. I must go and wash up - still lovely having hot water - and have 2nd breakfast. Despite my best efforts I woke at 7 which is far too early for me. Hope you all have good days, in spite of all that is going on for you.

Baskets, I still think you're a saint. Does sound like you've done the right thing for him. Must have been horrid when he hated school so much. I have a close friend who's done similar for her boy and it's worked well for him too. They've put him back into a mainstream school now and he's fine, but it all seems to be down to the confidence he gained from a few years at home. I'm a great believer in education coming from all directions.

Yes, i think the confidence 'thing' has been very important for my boys too. Ironically, the HE world is full of bullies (both young people and parents IME) so there is ample opportunity to develop skills in dealing with this, but in a somewhat safer, more supported environment, with quick bursts of half days here and there rather than day in day out for 11 or so years! That's my slightly cynical view anyway. In truth my boys would never have fitted in in a conventional set up, too many eccentricities perhaps. So the respite for all of us has been quite a relief, and I do think getting the boy settled back into the system is harder work than keeping going for a few more years. Possibly :-))

Hi - popping in again with an update...
Have a date for my MRI - next tues 14th
( apparently has to be between days 6 - 16 of your cycle to get the best images ) then my 21st consultant appt had to be cancelled and re arranged for 28th as it takes 2 weeks to get all the info together for the consultant. Bit nervous but I have calmed down a lot in the last few weeks - thinking 'whatever will be,will be' x

Hi Laetissimus, had been wondering how you were. Great to hear MRI's soon, as you've had a v.long wait. Waiting until 28th for results seems a bit cruel. Does it really take them that long??

Baskets, must be a tough call to make for your DS. Does he want to go back into mainstream ed? I know with my friend, in the end her son decided he wanted to give it a try. Made it a lot easier for him to go for it as it was sort of his idea.

Good you have scan but seems a long time to wait for results laetissimus

baskets am even more impressed than ever given poor ds had the anxiety ,as to deal with.

smee friend has been round with her boys so played with them and had Lunch (dsis also around as was working at home). She is out now so am lazing and going to read my book/doze then do some Pilates later (don't worry - I will be flat out tomorrow as its my flat day...).

Thats good as had bit of a meltdown on phone to dh last night- seems that Is worst time as am tired and emotional.

Oh but dh has smees godchildren visiting today so can anticipate a thoroughly over excited big gig .. Probably better off lazing here

How you doing gracie? overthemill have I badgered on about zinc and magnesium helping with the steroids to you.

Glad you got your appointment for scan Laetissimum but agree with others 28th is long time to wait but hang with us and we will take you mind off it.

Hopefully you feel a bit brighter today gigs. Sometimes a meltdown is good as it sort of clears the air.

overthemill how are you feeling today post chemo? I hope the sickness has stayed away.

kurri how are your shingles? Hopefully your GP will give you something stronger or possibly up your Amitriptyline.

Been racing about most of the day, had even one summer scheme drop off and food shopping done by 9.30 am. Have wizzed the hoover round and tidied a little just in case DH thinks I have done nothing all day and if my stupid mutt doesn't stop taking things into the garden I may just scream. He has had amongst other things, a screwdriver, tv controls, peg bag with pegs and at one stage he was lying beneath the swing 'guarding' my wig.

picc line seems a bit easier today. I bought some bigger tubigrip as the other felt a bit tight . Redness seems to have gone down too so that is good.

Off tonight to an Olympics Family Fun night tonight (would rather stick pins in my eyes but I have to keep the kids happy).

at dog guarding your wig gracie !!! Hope you are doing Ok today. Maybe Olympics fun night won't be too bad? Glad the PICC redness has faded a bit.

kurri boo for ruddy shingles. Have you been back to docs? Is there something else they can give you?

Poor gig thinking of you. Hope you're feeling a bit brighter this afternoon.

How you doing smee? DS enjoying holidays? How did his assessment go? Or is it not yet? Sorry if I've missed the details.

overhtemill how you feeling today? Hope you are bearing up ok x x

Got DH to clip my slightly wayward fuzz today, to get rid of wispy bits that didn't fall out with chemo and tidy it up a bit - Its a bit less tufty now and a bit more even! It's still very GI Jane, and alarmingly greyer darker than my previous mousy non descript blonde, but quite pleased with how it's growing. Trying to remember to take my scarf off at home, to let air get to my head.

What's everyone up to this afternoon? Hope everyone Ok x x

Hello all, - been out all day - yoga in the morning, lunch with a friend and art club in the afternoon. (Fat hedgehog has gone into the exhibition)

Shingles have been sore all day - especially around my eye - will phone the GP tomorrow and see if he'll prescribe something different over the phone (a friend who had a TIA (sort of mini stroke) recommended a drug she was given for neuropathic pain, - so I'll ask him about changing to that.

Laetissimus - good luck with your scan - it's good you've got a date at last, - but seems a long time to wait for your results, come on here and let us distract you while you wait

Waving and love to everyone - am dashing off for my tea. It is so hot and humid here - may spend the evening lying in front of the fan

Gig, it must feel like you've a way to go yet. I'd bet that and DH being away without you and the little Gigs is ever so hard. You are doing brilliantly you know. I hope the little Gigs had fun with M&C. Bet it's chaos.

Gracie, slow down woman! I felt exhausted just reading that... Great to hear Picc's behaving a bit better though.

Ned, hair's sounding good. Any sign of the chemo curl? Hope you escape it. I think Sometimes managed to. Mine looked like a dodgy football managers perm.. You haven't missed me talking of DS's assessment as I hadn't mentioned it. We're still waiting for the report, but apparently he's mid range dyslexic, which was what we expected. Still a bit of a thing to have it finally acknowledged, but I'm sure it will help us to get him through. The Ed Psych told us he's extraordinarily bright so am not sure he can be my son. I have been teasing DH as what with DS being so v.clever and me with my perfect Cervix and ovaries, he's letting the side down a bit.

Kurri, glad you're keeping busy. Those shingles sound irksome. I didn't know they could linger on for so long.

Hope overthemill's not too bad x

Laetissimus- good news about scan but yes,that's and age to wait for results.
Have been working today though did go out to look for the golden postbox in town (though it should be in the actual village where the winner lives rather than town)

hi everybody, sorry, busy day. thanks for all advice - will look at zinc and magnesium. feel sick today but manageable. had 2 dog walks with dh who has been watching me anxiously all day! done some housework, taken dd 13 to vet with poorly rabbit who will have to be pts tomorrow sadly. helped arrange a rabbit party for them all for their last night.

so bit of a mad house!
friend came round to offer chemo run any time we needed it so have booked her in. so kind of so many people to offer help

Aw poor wee rabbit overthemill and poor DD. I am a huge animal softy so would be in bits. Good that you managed to walk the dog and that the sickness isn't too bad.

Back from Olympics fun night which was actually good fun. The kids had a ball.

kurri was the drug recommended Lyrica (Pregnabalin). I used to take it as I suffer from neurological pain from a back and neck condition (which has been surprisingly absent since I have been off work). I was then switched to the Amitriptyline whch I found better but you may be the other way round and find Lyrica better.

Going to ring the nurse in the morning as I had another look at my picc line and it seems to be oozing a bit.

Hope everyone is having a nice evening.

Good Morning, the boys are still fast asleep exhausted from cub camp - but had a good time I think - so time to write a post this morning.

Kurri - hope you get the shingles sorted out soon - seems to have lasted a long, long time.

Ned - was wondering about your hair - mine is growing back in decididely (spelling still suffering from chemo brain) fashion - white on top and dark at the sides and still a few patches where there is little hair. No sign of chemo curl - bit disappointed as I quite fancied curls having had straight hair all my life.

Hope all the chemo ladies are doing O.K. I was sent by EP (educational psychologist) some BUPA leaflets to help kids cope with cancer which seem quite good for junior school age children - could have done with them six months ago as my boys have found the whole experience very stressful but better late than never. You can get them here: www.bupa.co.uk/iknowsomeonewithcancer

Baskets - I am very impressed by the home schooling. We thought we might be forced to going there ourselves last term for similar reasons but fingers crossed ds2 is slowly settling back down at school again.

Hope everyone has a good day - sun is shining here so planning day in the garden.

morning oneineight
about poor bunny overthemill
Elaborately weird dreams again.

Morning All

Off out shortly to hospital for yet another wound check appointment .
Got to phone GP aswell as district nurse took a swab from the wound last week and it's still not back .

And then , tomorrow morning , we go on our holidays !
7 glorious days in my favourite place in the world .
A house on the beach , in Connemara .

Love to everyone .
Gigs I hope you feel ok today .
Gracie that fecking picc line ! I'll lend you my veins
Mas horrible dreams again ? Anything worrying you ?

To everybody else , I am reading and thinking of you all . Time is just running away from me this morning .

Hope wound is ok as its about time it cleared up topsy . And have a lovely holiday.

overthemill about rabbit.

Waves to oneineight

mas sorry you has a bad night. Does meditating help or have no difference on this type of thing? Just wondered as trying to be more disciplined about it myself .

Thanks for supporting my wobble- managed to get out and do some exercise which helped and am speaking to nutrionist about food . Really had a nice evening with my sis last night.

Big gig has very much enjoyed m and c visiting smee - a lot of ice cream was eaten. Naturally when I spoke to dh she was far too busy to speak (so had mini gig instead who tries to eat the Skype).

Sorry about your DD's rabbit overthemill - what a shame, - was it quite an old bunny?

gracie - hope that picc line is OK this morning, and nurse has had a look. I think that is the drug my friend mentioned, shingles weren't quite so bad last night - i took a tablet and it seemed to work better, but they are hurting again this morning - I can only take one tablet in the evening.

OneInEight -lovely to see you, and I hope you are doing well. My hair also grew back in a rather bizarre way - I looked like a badger for a while, with a white stripe - but it is (more or less) normal now.

MAS - I'm going through a weird dream phase too - although I've put it down to my tablets, - but I definitely think stress plays a big part - its very tiring isn't it?, - doesn't feel as if you've really slept properly at all, - lots of sympathy and hugs.

topsy, have a fabulous holiday - laze around on the beach and treat yourself, - have you got a big fat holiday read to take with you?

Gig - I'm glad you had a good time with your sister, - you DSIs sounds lovely - and its nice your girls are having fun, even though you must be missing them.

DD and I went swimming this morning. We were in the lanes and a big bossy woman kept swimming past and shoving us and shouting 'I need to overtake you' then when we were getting changed she came over and said 'I swam a mile today, I usually do two but, I didn't have time blah blah blah'. I gave her my 'I couldn't be less interested' look.
Then she opened her locker and said 'oh no I've forgotten my bloody towel'

How DD and I laughed sympathised

Kurriots glad things bit easier and your story about towel made me .

arf @ towel woman !!
Sorry that you are having bad dreams kk - they are exhausting - mine aren't so much bad as in frightening as anxiety based,with lots of content which is exhausting ! I sometimes try breathing for meditation in bed to send me to sleep calmly.

topsy hope you have a really fab,relaxing and wonderful holiday- sounds idyllic xxxx

Saw a tissue viability nurse at the hospital today .
She painted my open breast wound with silver nitrate .
Feck me , but that burns !!!

Taking pig/dog to the kennels now , then it's a mad rush to get the pre holiday gubbings finished .

Later Gaters

Ouch topsy - but hopefully it will work, - that silver nitrate is supposed to be good stuff.

MAS - my dreams are very involved and complicated rather than bad too, - I'm not frightened by them in any way, and I don't wake up - just feel as if I've done a days work sorting out complex scenarios when I wake up!

DS is coming over to stay this evening - he and DH are going to mend the roof tomorrow (at last) - so it will be nice to see him, - it feels like ages since I have.

silver is a natural healing thing isn't it ? hope it works ! Does pig dog like his doggie hotel ?
kk our dreams sound similar - epic and tiring !

Pig/dog tried to jump the 6 foot fence at kennels to come home with us