**TAMOXIFEN 17 **

[MaryAnnSingleton]

blimey- we're almost up to our limit...so brand new shiny,sparkling thread.

I'm glad lovely Christmasses were had by all, - Figgy, I am not brave enough for sales today, but will have to go out either tomorrow or wed. because its DD's birthday on the 29th and I need to get her something. Hope your DS manages to get the part he needs for his game. Have fun with your guests tomorrow.

topsy - you are not at risk the same way you were on chemo, - your wbc count will be getting back to a decent level, but do just keep an eye on things, you may still be a bit compromised, because its not long since you finished. If you get a temp., or feel as if you might be getting an infection, - do see your doc. (or ring your unit if you are feeling at all poorly). I did find myself more vulnerable to picking up bugs after chemo - think its just such a big knock to your whole system. - And no it does not sound selfish to worry,

Enjoy your lunch MAS - sounds very nice.

There is a ring, - but I haven't seen it yet, - I will tomorrow I think. - Will make my 'DIL-to-be' flash it at me.

I am feeling very over stuffed with food still. So am planning a nice bath with my new smellies, followed by a browse through the seed catalogue - my Mum sent me a Fothergills voucher.

Have a lovely day everyone

oh my- you'll be a MIL kk !!!
lunch was lovely - we're now relaxing a bit,MIL having a cup of tea and cake.

Waves to everyone. Boxing day walk with 2 of my cousins today - very windy and muddy but at least it wasn't raining! Going to make tea soon and drink my bottle of beer. Maybe more sloe gin later Need to start packing soon so more washing in.

Time for a !

Waving festive cheer to all. First time I've had a chance to post. at the idea of kurri as a MIL. What lovely news though. Is there a date yet?

We've had a fantastic time, chilling out at home with various people popping by. DS's favourite present was a Diablo, which he's been practising ever since he opened it and even took it to bed with him last night - apparently he might think of a new trick in his sleep. Not all good here though as my dad had a minor stroke on Christmas Eve. The hospital are being v. thorough and still running tests. Still scary though.

Hope everyone's curled up happily with festive treats. I am watching Miranda Hart on C4 with mint thins. Mmm..

oh poor dad smee- hope all will be well xxxx

Oh dear I'm sorry about your Dad Smee, - did he have to spend Christmas day in hospital? - poor chap - and worrying for you all. I hope he's better soon.

There isn't a date yet, - in about a year seems to be DS's rough estimate.
I am nervous about being a MIL - will I suddenly turn into a dragon overnight?

I have been watching Christopher Ecclestone in the borrowers, and then Poirot. Whilst munching chocs. FBS mmmmmmmmmmmm.

Sorry to hear about your Dad smee , hope all is well with him .
What is a Diablo ?

kk wonder if your DIL to be will get herself on the boards here and start complaining about her MIL from hell ?

Watched Miranda and Bear , recorded Poirot .
Am now watching my recorded episode of Christmas at Downton .
Will regret staying up this late in the morning , but tomorrow is my last day for a lie in as rads start again on Wednesday .

DD got a childrens knitting set as one of her Christmas pressies , and I have stolen it !
Haven't knitted for years , it is so therapeutic isn't it ?
Have now got "knitters claw" as my hands have seized up from knitting an entire scarf in one evening

kk you'll be needing a wedding picture for them (shameless marketing)
Really hope your dad is feeling better today and safely at home smee

Smee, what news of your Dad?

Lovely Christmas here...very enjoyable. Many friends round later so whizzing about with cleaning stuff in between quick catchups online.

topsy -being posted about as a MIL from hell is my great fear.

I love knitting - I'm making myself a cardi at the moment. I had to stop for a while when I had that problem with my wrist, and I really missed it.

Yes MAS - I will be needing a wedding picture, definitely.

I'm glad you had a lovely Christmas amber

Thinking of your Dad Smee- I hope he is feeling better today.

wish I could knit - have tried and am hopeless.
Glad you're having a very jolly time amber

Afternoon all. Sorry to hear about Smees Dad. Hope the test results are good.

Made a cake and some buns this morning. Then I went out and did the nhs couch to 5k podcast and survived, so feeling very smug pleased with myself. Now time for a shower and some lunch and over to see some rellys later.

Still waiting for news on Dad. He's had a minor stroke and they've detected a heart murmur, which might have caused it. He's having a new round of tests today, so we should know more in a bit. We were supposed to be travelling up to stay today, but have put that on hold until he's safely home.

Topsy, a diablo's two stick with string between and a top like thing that runs along the string and you can throw/ catch/ spin. Harder than it looks. I nearly knocked over the Christmas tree earlier.

Kurri, you'll have to practise passive agression if you're going to be a MIL. Those thinly veiled put-me-downs are apparently a must.

Hi all, hope everyone has had a nice christmas. I just have two weeks to wait now for the charmingly named 'cancer clinic' (no room for kidding myself with my GP) to find out if my lumps and bumps mean anything. I can still feel the one, possibly two lumpy bits and am very aware of my breat, IYKWIM. Sore?not sure, maybe just hyper sensitive to any twinge.

So, for on the day any rules i should be following? Presumably good shower ans shave the armpits. Any rules on the use of deodorant?

dig I think no deodorant (are you having nodes done- apologies for not remembering) - just clean and sparkling. How are you doing with the waiting ?
smee thinking of your dad and hoping the results are encouraging xxxxx

Mary, not sure what i will get done gp could feel the lump too but thought it felt innocent.so not sure if feeling alone is enough,or if i will get a scan,ultrasound or biopsy.

ah yes, I think they will feel and decide- horrid for you to be waiting for this though.

am hiding at home -am getting a bit jaded by the constant repetition by MIL and my own mum - and very restless- am baking cookies and have whipped up the cream for trifle- I guess I'll go back soon...

I have been treated for breast cancer 5 times, double masctectomy, rad,chemo,the lot.i stopped tamoxifen,i felt so ill on it..it did not work for me anyway,but Im on my feet and still her.i survive to spite people.

am glad that you are doing well without tamoxifen fallon - it's unfortunate that it made you feel ill.

MaryAnn....I decided it was bad enouhg living with this,without any side effects to add....i was SO tired and unwell all the time..I suffer from chronic fatigue from my treatment anyway,so, have enough to contend with...yesterday was a "tired" day and then I get down hearted.

Sorry you've had such a touch time fallon. Strange how Tamoxifen seems to be a such lottery in terms of side effects. Bugger if it hits like it has you though.

Dig, maybe take a notebook with you with a list of questions and write everything down as they tell you. My brain turns to mush at appointments. Fingers crossed that you'll be skipping out with the best of news though.

MAS, hiding from relatives is an essential skill for festive survival.

Kurri, I skim read that post to MAS that you'll be 'knitting a wedding picture' Actually I think you should!

Thanks for worrying about my dear Dad. He's been cleared to go home, which is excellent. They've found a furred up artery to the left side of his brain, so that's obviously what caused it. He will probably have to have more treatment, but it's great they've found it before something more major happened. I think he's had a very close shave, so he's a lucky man in some ways. We're off to see them tomorrow, so I doubt I'll be back for a few days.

Wishing everyone plentiful fbs and top notch relative avoidance skills.

Smee that's excellent news . I am so glad to hear he is well enough to go home .

MAS I too hid from everyone. It all gets a bit too much sometimes doesn't it ?

Hi fallon . Pleased to meet you . 5 times ? Oh boy you are really going for it aren't you ? Hope all goes well for you in the New Year .

Christmas was lovely . Quiet , but lovely .
Trying very hard , very very hard , not to do the "this could be my last Christmas" thing . Didn't help watching the Tanya Branning story in Eastenders . DH and I just looked at each other when we saw that .

Anyone got any New Year Resolutions ?
Mine is to teach myself how to knit . Going to make a blanket/throw .
And also to be more positive

Glass of wine anyone ?

Really pleased your dad is home Smee, and they have found out what the problem is, it is good they have caught it before it affected him more badly.

fallon8 - I'm sorry you had such a tough time on tamoxifen, have you tried any of the alternatives?

topsy - ignore TV programmes - they aren't based on reality. Everything will feel poignant to you because of what you are going through, but you are having treatment and you are responding well. That is very much in your favour.
xx

I'll join you in a glass of red, Topsy. Must be impossible being stuck with all you face, though fwiw, I think you do amazingly. Still can't believe you've been so unlucky. Seems unreal and unfair

Knitting sounds a good way to distract. Are you going to do squares? Makes it more fun/ easy to grow and your kids might even join in - if you want them to that is.

Bit of drama here, as DS has just had half an hour of meltdown with blood gushing from his mouth. He and DH were playing and he somehow crashed his front teeth. He's only got one and it's now nearly out, but he's hysterical about it. The screaming was valid for the first five minutes or so, but I think tiredness has taken over, so I had to shovel him into his pyjamas, have insisted on some paracetemol and he's calmed enough to let DH read him a book. Phew...!