TAMOXIFEN thread number 8 ********

[MaryAnnSingleton]

just in case we run out of space !

I did mean to add that, even if they do refer you for a biopsy, it doesn't mean you have BC by the way.

Try and have a lovely evening

LGF Bless your DS, I was just like that. I used to get in trouble for begging to go to bed all the time!

I'll wait and see when the appt is and then decide about taking someone with me. There is a mum at toddlers who would probably have DD1 for me (depending on her work schedule) but its a big ask for someone you don't know very well to have your 2.1yr and your 8mth old as well as their own. I'd hate to cause a fuss asking people to babysit when I could just go on my own.

Sally, I had already had a mammogram as it was this which showed up something dubious. So I was recalled after a routine scan, then had an ultra-sound and then straight after that the core biopsy.

I was on my own for those parts, but recommend you take a friend. I had to wait a week for the results and then DH came with me. This was the most important time (for me) to have someone there as I got the bad news that I'd feared.

All these tests are quite bearable and as KK describes. Just a bit uncomfortable at times.

Its so tough at the these early stages before you know what you're dealing with. Sending virtual hugs.

Sally, g'ah - sorry you got referred, though it's just what they do. I always trot this out, but 9 out of 10 referrals to breast clinics are benign, which let's face it are pretty good odds.

The others have covered what will happen at the appointment, but in terms of taking someone or not, it might be worth trying and find out if your hospital does results on the same day or not. If you go to their website, that might tell you. My hospital did, so I had all of the tests in the morning, then went back at the end of the day for the results. If you can find out, it might help you to work out whether it's okay to go alone or not iyswim.

Hope you've got a very large glass of wine tonight. Be better once you know, and I still think you'll be fine. Stick with us for lots of hand holding, and ask as many question as you want. Really doesn't matter how daft or trivial.

LGF, how sweet that he likes his bed. Really hope the others don't catch it, and more's to the point, hope you don't either. What day of your cycle are you now? Can't remember where you're up to.

MAS, mediation lunch mention has made me hungry. Sounds like an excellent way of spending the day though.

SR, you've got a decorator coming in, with a kitten. I predict alternative paint patterns.

I've just had a very indulgent day. Went to see a friend's play at the matinee, which involved a long train trip there and back. Just me and a book - can't remember the last time I did that. Am going to cook nice food for DH now to compensate for neglect.

Sand Yes its the not knowing that is the thing. I feel like I'm panicking and possibly with no reason at all to.

Smee - I am on day 17 (i think)

Sally - Smee made a good point about checking when the results come back. I didn't realise that it differed around the country.

I've checked their website and it says that in some cases you can be seen and discharged in one visit so maybe I'd get results the same day, it says if further tests are needed (ie. biopsy) then they aim to get the results out ASAP. Will wait and see when the appt is to see what I'll do.

Thanks all, it is so helpful to have someone to ask things to. Trying to not make a big deal of it with my DH because he looks v worried as it is, poor boy

Sally I did actually go to the initial clinic appointment by myself, partly because I just prefer to deal with difficult things by myself sometimes - less worrying about how the other person is? I prefer to 'sort myself out' before I have to deal with other people's reactions. But I certainly wouldn't advise it for everyone. We're all different! Didn't really expect to have any results that day anyway.

Did taxi there and back, would have been too shaky to drive. Had mammo, ultrasound and 6 biopsies (3 lumps). The biopsy sound is quite loud and made me really jump first time! It sounds like a cap gun being fired. I happened to be on strong painkillers for something else, so with those and the Local I really didn't feel a thing! Maybe take something half an hour before if you're worried about it?

Had to wait 6 days for the biopsy results but they admitted on the day that mine looked like cancer, but think this is only because I asked outright. The ultrasound man was very serious so I suddenly got a very bad feeling and just wanted to know there and then. Don't forget that most of us are on this thread because our lumps did turn out to be cancer, and that many many more women walk away with good news!

I got my sister to visit for a few days on a pretext, so she was at home with the boys, who are 11 and 7 - much older than yours, so easier to leave with someone. I told her just beforehand what the appointment was for. Would your stepmum be able to help? I remember you mentioned you had told her.

Worst part was waiting for 'the right moment' to tell DH that evening. He came with me for the official results meeting the following week.

I didn't ask whether it looked like cancer- I don't think it had occurred to me -strange that I was so unaware. I got my results within 2 days (biopsy on the Friday-results on Tuesday)
It is nice to have someone with you and was very helpful having dh there for results.

Just dropping in quickly to say thanks all for telling me what happened when you went to the clinic.

Off out shortly for the day to keep myself occupied, also arranged to spend tomorrow with a friend and her kids so won't be sat worrying.

Still not sure on the going on my own thing, DStepM works so don't think she can come really, would feel bad asking her to take the day plus not sure how she would explain that to Dad as she would have to travel up. Think going on my own and being brave is probably the answer and taking DH if I have to go back again for results or anything.

Right, of out now with DH and the DDs to have a fun day with no worrying!

Sally - glad you have a full day.

Hmm will prob have to shut kitten up for parts of the days due to the decorator! He's so sweet to have around I must say.

I didn't think to ask directly about whether it was cancer, at the biopsy either. It was all I could do to deal with the biopsy. But I knew after the ultrasound that it was looking a bit grim as they asked me to come back in half an hour for the biopsy and the Dr and nurse looked so serious. I had just sailed in thinking all would be fine, so was a bit dumb-struck and didn't ask anything really, that day.

Anyway, Sally, be warned that even if you do find its cancer (and lets hope it isn't) it still takes a while after that to know what sort of cancer and what treatment you need. Its a journey in stages so hence the importance of dealing with each stage one at a time. It took from diagnosis in early December to mid April, in my case, to know that not all lymph nodes were affected, for example. There were delays in that timing, for various reasons, but my point is that I had to learn that cancer could mean a number of different things so best to try to prepare your self for this and not assume anything at all really. Its all so complicated that I decided not to try to understand all the possible sceanrios - there are too many so it is much easier just to wait till you know what you personally have to handle, and then deal with that. That's partly why there's no point in googling really as that is unnecessarily scary.Just assume that you'll be able to cope though, because you will.

wise words from SR there sally. Hope you've had a good day today- hang in there

Am just adding a link to the Ganbare Nippon Tsunami Appeal shop on etsy where you can buy lovely artwork -originals and prints- witrh 100% going to the Japanese people...I have 3 pieces for sale,but there is other very nice stuffand more being added every day...
here

Just posted on that other link MAS.

SR, is it the decorator who is sweet to have around, or the kitten?

Sally, hope you're okay today and that you get your appointment through soon. At least then you can plot your week.

Waving to all others.

how's this for common sense.... we hotdesk in the office, and using the internal intranet all social networking sites (ie facebook) and all forum sites (such as mumsnet) are barred except housing.net (it's an exciting website ). HOWEVER we all have galaxy tablets.... linked to the wifi..... which can still be used to access fb etc.

So you ban sites that will distract your employees, then give them a toy so that they can not only sit at their desk and be distracted by.... but they can also sit in the 'outside office' (gazebo/garden/ patio furniture etc) and be distracted thus meaning that there is no incentive to sit and do anything of usefulness to the organisation!

I'm quite enjoying the job now- no cock ups yet today!

take care RWU -it's still only morning...

An office with a gazebo and furniture sounds like my kind of office!

Hi Sally - i haven't been around for a few daye, and I have nothing else to add. I hope you get the appointment very soon, and some answers. Don't read too much into the GP's unwillingness to comment either way: when anyone knows anything for certain, they will be really straight with you. They just won't speculate.

MAS, hope you don't mind me having a bit of a go at that pompous idiot on your chat thread. I thought you were v.measured, she deserved a swift kick.

aw thanks smee - much appreciated

She was a pillock, MAS - I'd have given her a kick as well, but it had been administered pretty effectively my smee by the time I looked. You do wonder, sometimes...

I took dd to the circus at the weekend. There was a Dutch performer, juggling eggs with his mouth, and I am afraid to say my mind wandered away from the spectacle to wondering what other talents his mouth might have

You can always rely on me to lower the tone. I'll get my coat.

Hello all, hope everyone is feeling OK today.

Good kicking technique Smee well done.

Hope this week is minus embarrassing episodes/brushes with the law RWU

Like the sound of the Dutchman with talented mouth moves Cakes.

Had to miss yoga again today because of my shoulder - it was getting better over the weekend, then I stretched too far to set the clock last night in bed and it's hurting again. Grr.

DS has a chance of some part time work doing drama workshops in a prison - he's having an interview this week. His DP works in the prison, so would be handy for them both - in terms of transport etc. (I do worry about her a bit - and her safety - she deals with men who've committed very violent crimes.)

A large crow has wedged itself in my small bird table (its one of those with a roof)and is hoovering up all the special robin food I bought - what a git!

It's a good thing to have on DS's cv, I should think, KK. Scary though. I used to be samaritans volunteer and some of the people who came in were pretty worrying: I should think violent prisoners would be terrifying to deal with. Yikes!

I read 'a large cow has wedged itself...'

drama workshops sound good KK but also a bit scary- am sure the prisoners would get a lot out of them though. Sorry that your shoulder is hurting again -what a pain,literally
Thanks for defending my artwork for Japan thing - much appreciated

I wouldn't have been so cross about a cow MAS