**TAMOXIFEN**the 6th

[MaryAnnSingleton]

here we go !

Thank you for all the good wishes, I am off in a couple of hours. Dh is taking charge of the dc.....we will see how that goes .

I have a lovely friend who I told about my going today, and she is insisting on taking me, which is so lovely of her, she has so much going on in her life. Mainly because of how positive and supportive you guys have been, I have told her that would be really nice if she could. So she is coming to pick me up. Fingers crossed.

Very pleased your friend is taking you Sparkle - that will be a great support

Oh good on you, Sparkle. And good on your friend. She will make a big difference. I'm thinking of you. Good luck.

I have just eaten cake. I really am crap at willpower.

Crisps here - DH came home for lunch unexpectedly, with a big bag. Sigh. - I'll need to go shopping for bigger trousers soon.

Good to know I'm not alone as my backside expands. It'll be visible on Google Earth at this rate.

Yes - Bum with its own post code here too

at GoogleEarth and postcode bums.

Had fruit for breakfast and thin soup for lunch but later had a number of crackers and butter and then 3 sesame snaps. However did force myself to go for a good walk so not too bad really. Has anyone tried Rosemary Coneelly's diet and fitness classes? I really must do something about my weight and I don't like Weightwwatchers much - all that queuing business and there's no activity involved.

I've just bought a box of brownies !!

Hope all has been ok today Sparkle and glad that you have a friend with you - a great help.
Weddings - how exciting !! ( Cakes might recommend my picture services !!)

I have been to Maryland in August and it was stiflingly hot as I recall.
Must dash as ds needs refreshments after school,me too - no lunch yet !

See I leave for barely a day and it's all bottoms and cake. Glad to hear about good things like trips to Edinburgh weddings and Choc Brownies though.

Sparkle, still thinking of you and sending positive vibes. Mighty glad you have someone with you today.

Cakes, I used to sneak into Rum Runner when way too young. I was about 14, so am a bit shocked at myself being there that young, but we could have been there at the same time as that would make it 1980-ish. Didn't go there very often, as we used to frequent far more trashy clubs.

Elvis crooning whilst on Rads today. They do so like a bit of variety. I have a rash though, which is apparently the start of my skin breaking down. Bit of a sod as I'm less than half way through. Am meeting the Nurses tomorrow to discuss a 'strategy'.

We probably passed like impossibly cool and trendy ships in the night, then, smee

oh dear ref skin. It happens frequently though so don't worry. I can't remember what the strategy was: but there was one. Good luck!

SR - i haven't tried the exercise classes but i have tried the diet. Not enough food!!!

I wish I could claim 'trendy' Cakes, but I still remember my favourite dress.

quick tip for smee- a piece of raw silk (can't remember what they call it but i think it begins with b????) stuffed between clothing and skin helps x

bourette silk- that's the one!

yep, silk helped me- try to keep the skin dry too. It soon heals up but is a bit of a pain...
Would it upset you if I posted a little film I've made of my brother ? RWU might've seen it on my facebook page. It's sad making - I think I've upset my dad by sending it to him-it's meant to be therapeutic.

p.s. ate 4 brownies

Please do post your film MAS, if it would be therapeutic for you. I would feel privileged to see it.

I agree with Kurri, MAS. Be good to share it.

Thanks for the silk tips. I will head to John Lewis on a bourette hunt then.

Well, Thank you for all your lovely messages and thoughts, my dh says to say thank you from him too, as you have made me laugh over the last few days, and he sees how supportive I have foubd your thread and messages.

This is what happened.....not ideal really, but not too bad. The clinic was running over an hour late, so I just saw the consultant and I have to go back in two to three weeks to have ultrasound and mammogram, which is the shortest time they say they can do it in. He examined me and took samples of discharge from both nipples, both of which were positive for blood, one visually was pure blood the other looked white but was still positive for blood. Sorry if too much info, but want your opinions. He said was one of the following three in ascending order of likelyhood

1. Duct ectasia, affecting multiple ducts in both nipples, I am now on a massive dose for two weeks of 2 different antibiotics (no alcohol ) in case caused by infection, unlikely from description in booklet as linked to menopause and all women in my family have late not early menopauses in their 60's!
2. Polyps - extremely unlikely according to Consultant as have in both breasts.
3. Precancerous cells, or cancers cells if scans show any lumps not detected by feeling.

If duct ectasia then the antibiotics may work otherwise I will have to have Hadfields procedure in January, removal of all major milk ducts. If scans show something then biopsy will be scheduled after scan, and we will take it from there. If scan shows nothing then I have to wait until January for next appointment. Which ever way it looks like a waiting game, probably until xmas. He said if they find something in the scan it will be January before they do ay surgery anyway. What do you think? Have large glass of wine in hand, as can't start precription until tomorrow when I pick it up for small mercy.

you might find it better on the big screen - easier to read the text as I have been a bit hopeless with the sizing/timing...

Sorry should have said I hope everyone has had a good day.

Sparkle - o dear it all sounds a bit complicated here. I don't know anything about ectasia or polyps.

What I can perhaps comment on is that although I was diagnosed in early December, my surgeon said it would make no difference if the op was in January. A specialist oncolgy nurse and close friend confirmed this to me. I do indeed hpe they were right as my op was further delayed by snow in any case.

So having an op in Jan sounds as though it would not be an abnormal wait IYSWIM. It would just mean you'd have to distract yourself big style by having a wonderful Christmas, which is what I did last year! Cooking was my therapy.

MAS = your video is totally beautiful and a great tribute. Have to confess I'm in tears here though - it really makes me feel your loss. And one loss is a reminder of others.

The important thing though is io its therapeutic for you, and that it helps you to know we can see how lovely Richard was.

Sparkle - I can't offer any help in terms of info., because like SR I don't know anything about the first two conditions.

Do you have a breast care nurse? If not I think you should ask if you can have one, so you have someone to chat to, and act as go between between you and the hospital, because they are keeping you waiting around a bit ( on your behalf).

I don't think you should be overly concerned about the wait in physical terms, (I was had my final surgery nearly 4 months after DX because I was having various tests.) But waiting is hard to cope with mentally IYKWIM, and I think you'd be justified in be badgering a bit. (Your GP might be another source of support in terms of trying to speed things up a bit)

Anyway, - you sound calmer tonight which is good to see, you have one appointment out of the way and you are on the right track to getting it sorted out whatever it turns out to be. SR's advice is good, keep going, try not to let it overwhelm you, - and we're always here for a natter

MAS - I am in tears watching your video. It is a beautiful tribute to your dear brother, thank you for sharing it with us. (And Richard by the way,is a name I love - it is my DS's name )

Sparkle, oh heck I haven't a clue really, but it's good you know a bit more about what it could be. Knowledge is power somehow - or at least it always helps me. I'd echo what all others have said about the wait not mattering in terms of outcomes. Most important is finding out exactly what's wrong so that they can prescribe the optimum treatment. Bit of a sod you have to wait 3 weeks for mammogram/ ultrasound though. I think Kurri's right as they're making you wait far too long. Can you hassle them a bit on that front. If you haven't got a BC Nurse, then maybe call and ask if there are any cancellations or when to call to find out if there are any. Seems cruel to me to make you wait. Mind you, it's an even bigger sod you can't drink on those antibiotics! Drink large glass and enjoy and here's hoping the antibiotics work - now wouldn't that be fantastic.

MAS, I don't know what to say. Am so impressed you've made that film, and also that you've shared it with us. What a beautiful boy. I will drink a quiet toast to both of you tonight.

Sparkle- can't offer any advice about the possible duct thing or polyps I'm afraid - am sorry it's such a long drawn process though. Like KK and SR -am sure if there's a need for surgery then having it in January wouldn't make anything worse. Let's hope antibiotics sort it out -fingers crossed for you. Do get in touch with a breast care nurse -that's what they're there for and are generally brilliant.

Thanks for looking at my film and for saying such nice,kind words- it means a lot to me that you were touched by it. I am worried that I've distressed my dad - we never talk about my brother because it just seems too much - of course he is talked about but we don't press too deeply for fear of what we might uncover.