Blinded by the LIGHTer ladies!

[Mouseface]

Hello

Welcome to our thread all about cake cheese and chcolate healthy eating. Well, on a good day!

I'm Mouse, I have the weight of a huge Camenburg to lose but have lost lots already thanks to the support of this thread and the lovely LIGHTer ladies!

No rules, no clique, just us!!

Come say hi

Hello, I'm Bitter, I'm back from work and oly have about four of 5 pounds to lose.

Bow at my feet and hand over the cakes Porkies.

ONly four oR 5 pounds.

You can stop the bowing, clearly.

Hello, I can't sleep. Nightmares.

DS went to a sleepover with someone I feel bad about, very long story, and he hasn't texted me. He always does. Just stuff. I want him back and it feels like a stupidly long time till the morning.

School have let him down badly, he has been in trouble for helping put two special needs kids in the skips at school. I was horrified but he was adamant he didn't do it. He said they wouldn't listen to him, and he has real issues with this. Loads of punishments including being banned for two weeks from PE, and then late on Friday I got a message saying they were wrong, he wasn't involved. But he is really upset. (understandably so).

DD went to a sleepover at the weirdy man's house, which I also hated the idea of, but she phoned to come back so we went to bed together just to snuggle. It feels not right for DS to not be here.

Brian, I don't know. Don't protect him Don't sacrifice your relationship with DD to make him seem better, he has to do that himself.

. tbh mittz even if he had been involved, school still would bear part of the blame for inadequate playtime supervision.

sorry you have had such a difficult night Mittz.

brian - agree with mousey and double re:ex. Problem I can foresee with you offering to meet halfway is what if he says no - that could hurt DD even more.

I'm OK thank you, me and DD have been out for breakfast

I feel a bit sick , and achey from digging hardcore yesterday.

Also yuk at dog vomit!!

I am awake but not so, I could easily curl up for another hour. I might put Mumford and sons on and speaker shattering volume to wake me up!

Love ya all, .. so nice to be part of this xx

SaF, xx

Morning all.

Mittz - ((((((((((xxxxxxxxxx)))))))))).

Your poor DS. That is very bad form from the school. They should get their facts straight before pointing fingers. It's actually quite a damaging thing to acuse someone of IYSWIM? TBH, I'd have been really ed at him if he had been involved.

I don't have him down as that kind of lad.

Glad you and DD got to snuggle.

Double - dog vomit is almost as vile as cat vomit, stinks too. Yay for cleaning, I did the kitchen floor last night and it felt good. Lounge today before my folks arrive.

Brian - I hope DD1 is ok. And Mole too. How was she last night?

SAF - I take it that the cars are DS's? My lounge looks like a bomb site! Toys everywhere.

Nemo has puked again this morning. It looks like we are going back to his old relux pattern. I am so down about it. I thought we'd turned a corner.

We may well end up with surgery now.......

TC - hey!! Nice to see you xx

Bitter - are you in work again today? I bet you are shattered after a week off then having to do a late.

Hey UNO and 100 if you are around

Shower, beds to be stripped/washed, homework with DD, lounge to clean, lunches to make, shirt for MrM... well, he can do the ironing!

And off out for dinner with my parents later on. After Nemo's first hair cut.

you're not self absorbed and you have loads to give, you've helped me immensely over the past few months, you know you have. Good plan re the parents, will give you some time and some head space.xx

Miitz - fucking shit of the school that's horrendous poor lad x

bitter - I will not give you my goodies no matter how porky I am

dog sick - nice

im waving at the rest of you because ive got to go do something (nothing interesting) but will catch up when i get back. xx

and thank you all for the advice re dd and her 'father', will let you know how their chat went when she's back later (if she tells me). xx

Morning all.

Mouse, sorry about Nemo, have some brackets.

Brian, no advice re DDs dad, but know you are doing a fantastic job bringing her up.

Saf, is it the meds? Don't be silly, you are not self absorbed we all have patches when we are not doing so well, we are here for you when you are ready xx

Mittz, poor DS I would be livid at the injustice of it all.

I have achieved precisely nothing this morning, need to kick myself and get some things done today as I am working all day tomorrow.

Love to you all xx

The house is cranking up to chaotic so just wanted to say to SaF how sorry I am that you have hit a down curve. I really do relate to how you feel and have been in a similar place.
You are not a nutter , I can not tell you how often in the last 6 months I have stood just by the shower feeling utterly miserable that such a simple thing as personal hygiene, that normally I don't even give a minutes thought to, becomes a mountain to climb.
You are not alone, though I understand how very much it feel like that.
I have also planned to do a big timetable just to function on some days because I too ache for how my mental state impacts on the DC's.
I get so frustrated with myself..., but not always the frustration that says fuck it, I am going to change things, it is like wearing a lead suit, and I want to just cry, or just cease.

So please don't think harshly of yourself. You are doing something extraordinary for your DS in recognising his needs and you should acknowledge that lovey.
And yes, Get out. even if it is 10 steps today, and 15 tomorrow.
I look at myself and think, that I worked my way through university, cycling the 18 miles there and back when money was tight, had an indomitable spirit, and now putting a wash in and hanging it up can feel like an achievement. I fight when I have the strength, but with every fibre of my being, I want to stop fighting just to be.
You are a tremendous lady, and I hope you know how much we love and admire you. Friends share the downward curves as much as the sweeping highs, so maybe make posting on here a goal, even if it just a full stop,.
Reaching out is not something I am best at so advising you to do so is a bit rich, but I do recognise it's value.
Wishing you some peace of mind, Mittz xx

Mittz that was a lovely post xx

I have still achieved nothing, double you are putting me to shame.

Can't see GP for another 2 weeks as he is away and wants to see me himself, rather than a locum.

DH has done a couple of loads of laundry and has made me a cup of tea.

I need to shower and change the beds.

And I can't believe no-one has noticed my halloween namechange!

Mittz - What a wonderful post. That is exactly how I feel. And like SAF I just want it to stop. I am sick and tired of fighting it.

I want to just be. I am sick of how hard it is to even brush my teeth at the moment. I am sick of wearing this brave face.

Sorry to be self indulgent, I can just so relate to all of the words in Mittz's post.

Bitter - great namechange!! So subtle you had to point it out!!!

Washing and drying is done. I better get dressed. MrM keeps asking me what's wrong. Nothing is wrong but nothing is right.

How can I even begin to explain. I don't want to explain.

Sending you all much love. Hopefully the sun is shining where you are today. xx

Double - does that mean that you aren't hanging scones anymore?