Thread 22 Covid Cohort - Creeping towards the Future - Personal Statements and Interviews

[OrangeCinnamonCocktail]

This is a thread for supporting all young people post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting. It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, please don't within this thread. Please also be sensitive when responding to threads about grades.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue.

Our DS/DD may go down various paths (such as employment, apprenticeships, higher ed) We have decided for anyone interested they will most likely find us within the Further Ed board.

Previous thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/further_education/4370509-Thread-21-Corona-Cohort-Nervous-waiting-so-frustrating
Role Call below
@20newnames / DS / Engineering
@Alsoplayspiccolo / DD / English + Film
@AnneofCleavage / DD / gap year? Primary Education
@BlueMarigold / DD / Biology
@crazycrofter / DD / Child (?) + Mental Health Nursing
@Decorhate / DS / Economics + Politics
@Delphigirl / DS / Oceanography
@DoggerelBank / DS / tbc sciencey
@ealingwestmum / DD / Middle Eastern and European Studies
@EerilyDisembodied / DS / History or Environmental Management
@estherfrewen / DS / History
@EwwSprouts / DS / Biology
@Fiddlersgreen / DS / Journalism
@Fruitygal / DD / Biology
@Hattifatteners / DD / Vet Med
@Heifer / DD / Biology
@Hopeful201 / DS / Medicine
@Horace123 / DS / Classics
@icanbewhatiwant / DS / History + Philosophy
@Isthisjustnormal / DS / Comp Sci
@KingscoteStaff / DD / Medicine
@mummabear74 / DD / Environmental Science
@mummyinbeds / DS / Law + French Law
@Nard75 / DS / Maths
@NCTDN / DD / Liberal Arts
@Oblomov21 / DS / Accountancy
@OrangeCinnamonCocktail / DD / Music (uni)
@PaddingtonPaddington / DD / Music (cons)
@Piggywaspushed / DS / Social sciences combo
@ProggyMat / DD / Classics
@SandyBayley / DD / Medicine
@Seeline / DD / Liberal Arts
@singingstones / DS / Neuroscience
@Wheresthebeach / DD / gap year? Marine Biology
@whoamitojudge / DD / Cabin crew training
@Zebracat / DD / Liberal Arts or Anthropology
@ZittiEBuoni / DD / applying next year

That post must have made MN headlines as I remember seeing if and wondering why was this poor women getting grief for asking about a bag :-)

@Shimy Yes obviously up to the recent past there was plenty of work for school leavers so no need from a basic income point of view to move away for work or education. Sadly that’s no longer the case in many areas but the mindset has not changed.

Though tbh now I have my own children I appreciate how hard it was on my parents when I moved away.

Glad to hear others are still waking DC so it is not that weird, @Seeline encouraged to hear that they can learn to wake up at university! The son of a fellow TSR advisor said that one of her sons overslept in the first couple of weeks and realised his lecture had started and rang her to ask what he should do!

Monkey, in DD’s friend’s case, I don’t think she feels loved either. She says she has attachment issues, due to the fact that her parents only seem to care about how well she’s doing.

My parents also thought that they were good parents, because we were fed, clothed and disciplined; my mum’s evidence for her parenting skills are that we would “never dare” misbehave Emotional support or intelligence didn’t feature at all.

DH and I are completely different - we tell both DCs we love them whenever they leave the house, at the end of phone calls, and before bed every night. DS is nearly 16 and he always says, “Goodnight everyone, love you” from across the landing before he turns the light out. 🥰

For those DC struggling with waking up on time, DS has been late a few times to work and I discovered there are alarm clocks for heavy sleepers. He bought one, it rings, flashes lights and shakes the bed! he puts it under his pillow at night (or you can strap it to your wrist as well apparently) and so far he's been to work in timely fashion since. He bought it off amazon.

I also do the waking - I'm always awake anyway so I see it as making the best use of the team's skills
They can sort themselves out when they leave home.

I tell them I love them because my parents have never told me and I don't want there to be any doubt in my DC's minds. I'm sure my parents think it's obvious from the fact that they scrimped and saved to put us through private school, but sometimes it's nice to hear it or feel it in a hug.

my mum’s evidence for her parenting skills are that we would “never dare” misbehave

Very familiar. Mine judges others in this way too. I got suspended from school once and my DM's main concern was that I shouldn't answer the phone if it rang, in case it was one of her sisters. Not to spare my reputation, but just very anxious that she would be judged!

I tell them I love them because my parents have never told me and I don't want there to be any doubt in my DC's minds.

Love this for exactly the same reason. DS1 is quite aloof though and it hurts a bit but whenever I get the chance I squash him half to death, ds2 is very squishy.

ooh! offer from Loughborough.

@Shimy- great news!

Ooh - congratulations!!

Congratulations Shimy

Just back fro Warwick Open Day. It was good. I hope she gets an offer and goes there, I think it wouldbe perfect for her. But of course, as per the discussion, I know that will be for her to decide. But I would agree that Covid robbed these young people of so many normal opportunities to develop their independence,it’s hard fo4 5hem.

Congrats to Shimy jr - my nephew went to Loughborough and loved it

@Shimy Wow great news! Is it number 1 choice or was it an early submission?

Congrats on the Loughborough offer!

Interesting discussion about parenting styles! I do think it’s partly influenced by your kids’ personalities too. Dd was incredibly independent from about 12 months, she would toddle off in front of me when out walking and everyone thought I was a bit negligent but I just knew she’d stop at roads etc. And she would never hold my hand!

I was really hands off with dd at primary, she somehow learned to read almost overnight in reception and didn’t seem to need much help with anything and was the same at secondary, never needed help with homework/reminding to do it, revision assistance etc. She got through the 11 plus with me just giving her a couple of workbooks to do! But emotionally she’s a big sharer so I’ve always known all about her friends etc and since she’s started thinking about careers, she’s talked to us loads about it.

Ds is completely different, we had to take him out of primary in year 4 to home educate so that was pretty full on and then he needed intensive help from us for the 11 plus. And the first 3 years of secondary were so stressful until we realised he has ADHD, he really couldn’t organise homework/bag packing/revision or anything like that without my supervision. But in other areas of life he’s more independent than dd, he’s very happy to get around the city by bus, whereas she needs to be talked through a bus journey!

Generally though I think they need more guidance and support at this stage in their lives than when they were younger so I really can’t understand backing off in sixth form!

Congratulations shimy

Congrats @Shimy - where does this offer feature was it a top choice? Went out with DF last week her DD is currently on a placement year but studies at Loughborough and loves it!!

Thank you all for the congrats. I actually dozed off, afternoon snooze mid mning .

@Zebracat Glad your DD liked it. I don't know if you saw my feedback from Warwick open day a few weeks ago. We were impressed although Birmingham's open day was a bit more fluffier and warmer so that coloured my judgement a bit. They have great facilities don't they? and great community feeling.

@EwwSprouts It's actually Warwick that's his first choice so waiting nervously for that one but he likes the course at Loughborough a lot so who knows.

@singingstones Glad your Nephew enjoyed it. I've heard so many great things about Loughborough and also think DS would love it but so far all 3 he's seen seem a perfect match so rather difficult to say at this point.

@crazycrofter 100%. That too, when people are being critical of other peoples parenting on MN, they seem to assume everybody's dc is like theirs and I fail to understand how far removed their own experience is. DS2 also has adhd and other SEN and his maturity level way behind a lot of his peers when younger (he's only just catching up now). DS1 is also quite young for his age so the way I was parented is rather different from how I'm parenting my own dc because I don't know have SEN. . Someone commented upthread that they're only just realising how much their parents must've missed them when they went to uni. When I left home for uni, my parents also missed me a lot but for very different reasons. At 18, I was shouldering the entire housekeeping from cleaning to washing to cooking to childcare for everything except earning money outside the home and had been since I was 16. When I left, they suddenly they had to do it all themselves.

What subject is it again shimy?

Economics and Mangement.

fruitygal - No it wasn't a top choice, twas a bit of a 'controversial' choice actually . Lots of arguments about it but he had the last say after I felt I had advised him accordingly.

Oh yes, I remember now! Loughborough v good for management.

@Shimy we looked at the economics and management course and the geography and management one when DD was thinking about possibly economics or geography degrees as an alternative to biosciences in the early summer. We went to look round but she didn’t like the place which she was surprised about as lots of her friends love it. Warwick is amazing for economics (2 friends kids did well there)

DD loved the management courses - really good reputation but she did not the campus or accommodation??!

@Fruitygal - Where did you look at Econs & Mgt? was it Loughborough?
Thing is, ds didn't do Maths at A'level (Maths not his strongest subject)so couldn't apply for pure Economics at the sort of top unis he wanted to aim for. All his other options are Management or Business & Management but he needed a lower entry one though L would be perfect AAB, only he suddenly did a u-turn when he saw Economics & Management and decided he was going to apply for that instead (no A'level maths required) except standard offer is AAA. I've pointed out the wisdom in this but he was adamant that he wanted this as a possible 'backup', so here we are.