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Further education

You'll find discussions about A Levels and universities on our Further Education forum.

Original poster

Half way through Year 13 and the last school year.

999 replies

OhYouBadBadKitten · 14/02/2018 20:14

eep.

OP posts:
derekthe1adyhamster · 19/02/2018 20:40

I've now apologised to the girlfriend because some of the text was uncalled for, I was so worried. Her sister has also replied basically saying please be careful what you say to her as it could tip her over ( oops - bit late, but hopefully the apology will help), DS is ignoring me. Our first fight, It feels a little bit like a lovers fight. We don't do drama in our family ( thank god - I'm rubbish at it.)

Thank you for all the kind words it really helps

Icouldbeknitting · 19/02/2018 23:06

Derek I am so sorry, I agree with earlier posters in that you're damned if you do and damned if you don't. Whatever you say has a fair chance of being wrong but staying silent has its risks too.

If you're looking to be the worst mum in the world then I'm afraid you'll have to stand in line, you are far from being the only applicant.

chocolateworshipper · 20/02/2018 07:47

SluttyButty you are very welcome. I love the username!

doistayordoigo · 20/02/2018 08:17

Flowers for all those having a tough time with their DCs...this whole process is stressful enough without the added complications of teenage relationships, health issues and toxic friends. I think our teens always label us as the root of their problems at this age, I know DS has said that it's me that causes his ASD flare ups, but I'm just doing my best like all the other mums.

Although I was treated the rare experience of being considered the "better" parent yesterday over DH...thanks to DH's complete lack of navigating skills and inability to read the campus map on our re-visit to one of the unis Grin DS admitted that whilst I might worry too much and pass those worries onto him, the thought of DH having to organise it all/support him was infinitely worse! I will take this small crumb of almost praise....

janinlondon · 20/02/2018 11:44

"DS admitted that whilst I might worry too much and pass those worries onto him, the thought of DH having to organise it all/support him was infinitely worse!"
This ^ is also the only nice thing DD has said to me in the last, oh, four years?? Ha ha ha.

MrSlant · 20/02/2018 16:44

Sorry going to barge across all of you having a tough time with your lovely DC's to have a quick panic. Will the lecturers strike affect offer holder days? Supposed to be going up this weekend and I don't want to lose all that money on our hotel rooms? Is there any point going (will have to be two nights due to distance) just to see what the areas like if there's no input from the uni?

And none of you are bad parents, this is a ridiculously hard game this parenting stuff.

Nettleskeins · 20/02/2018 17:30

Mrslant cardiff moved our interview from next week till middle of March because of the strike. Interesting you say that because Oxford Brookes is having an offer day on 3rd, not sure whether there will be an issue with the lecturers, then. At least it is nearby.

MrSlant · 20/02/2018 17:43

I'll have to email won't I? Damn, the whole shape of half term from an attempt at 50\50 shared custody business has been shaped round his visit because it's a faff to get to. Hope I can get the eleventy million pounds back on bookings otherwise I might just have a holiday!

starfleet · 20/02/2018 17:45

🍷🥃💐 for anyone having a tough time with your DC'S. As I've said previously I have no helpful words of wisdom but can empathise, you're all doing a stellar job regardless. This is a tough time for them and they take the angst out on the closest to them. Hope things get better.

chocolateworshipper · 20/02/2018 18:31

If any of you need proof that parenting is hard: before Christmas DD was moaning that I should have had her earlier in the academic year because some of her friends were 18 and she couldn't go clubbing with them. Now she's complaining that it's hard to plan something to celebrate her 18th because some of her friends won't be 18 yet Confused

MrSlant · 20/02/2018 18:43

chocolate you are SO thoughtless, you needed to have her earlier and then make sure you made her Queen so she could have two birthdays. Tut.

We will never win be it the big battles or the small ones the only thing guaranteed is we are wrong! I cling on to the fact that this is because we are the most important people in their lives and therefore they feel safe to let it all out in our direction. Take comfort from that derek, he is only acting toward you as he is because he knows your bond is strong enough to take it, you are his safe space. Great fun isn't it?

MrSlant · 20/02/2018 19:14

Aha, the strike is only 'on' Thurs-Fri then Monday for three days so not officially striking at the weekend. That's a pain for them isn't it?!

 "UCU has written to the 61 universities* to inform them of an escalating wave of strikes over a four-week period that will begin with a five-day walkout either side of a weekend. There will then be four days of strikes from Monday 5 - Thursday 8 March and a full five-day walkout the following week (12 - 16 March). The strike dates are:

Week one - Thursday 22 and Friday 23 February (two days)

Week two - Monday 26, Tuesday 27 and Wednesday 28 February (three days)

Week three - Monday 5, Tuesday 6, Wednesday 7 and Thursday 8 March (four days)

Week four - Monday 12, Tuesday 13, Wednesday 14, Thursday 15 and Friday 16 March (five days)"

Original poster
OhYouBadBadKitten · 21/02/2018 07:25

Heads up for offers day people. Next Wednesday and Thursday could be tricky for traveling weather wise. Don't hold that as gospel, early days and all that.

OP posts:
HesMyLobster · 21/02/2018 08:08

Ooh Kitten are we getting snow?!
(No offer days for DD next week, just hoping for a snow day! Wink)

Original poster
OhYouBadBadKitten · 21/02/2018 08:19

Lobster it's possible, but not certain :) it depends on where exactly a high pressure ends up amongst other things. Eastern and southern areas could be badly affected.

OP posts:
puppypower1 · 21/02/2018 08:32

Snow...cold....Noooooo!! I need Spring Grin

UrsulaPandress · 21/02/2018 08:49

Hope not. Dd is driving to Leeds for the offer day. She wants to practice motorway driving with me riding shotgun. Our motorway junction has a big sign saying it is the highest in England.

FantasyAndHope · 21/02/2018 09:01

chocolate
That made me chuckle
Dd is at goldsmiths today, she’s currently on the train whining she shouldn’t have gone with grand central because the train is cramped and disgusting Hmm

ShanghaiDiva · 21/02/2018 09:04

I hate snow. We lived in Austria for 4 years and some years we had snow in October right the way through to the beginning of April.
Ds has made his decision - confirmed Warwick with Loughborough as reserve. He needs 38 points on the IB and has been predicted 44/45 so looks achievable, but plenty of work still to do.

starfleet · 21/02/2018 09:43

Oh I hate snow!

DS has an offer holder day at Leicester on Saturday but we are debating if he really needs to go. We were shown around by the Head of Dept who is also the admissions tutor during the open day, she spent about an hour with us and the subject talks were very thorough. If Newcastle's is anything to go by there wasn't a huge difference between offer holders/open day. He will definitely go to Liverpool the weekend after as it is more than likely that it will be his insurance as they have given him both a standard and reduced offer.

FantasyAndHope · 21/02/2018 10:01

Question for all you wise people, dd has asked me to ask what should she be asking on her applicant day today?

starfleet · 21/02/2018 10:36

We (meaning me!) asked about teaching hours, time available with lecturers, group tutorials - how many on average per group if not in lectures, percentage of coursework/exams, modules they can up from other degree subjects and most importantly I made sure I looked at the bathrooms and laundry facilities whilst on the accommodation tour 😉

starfleet · 21/02/2018 10:50

*modules they can pick up

Littledrummergirl · 21/02/2018 11:44

Ds1 has his interview on Wednesday. Between strikes, snow and my knee I think we are going to have an interesting day. I'm looking forward to it.

Nettleskeins · 21/02/2018 12:43

Fantasy they do seem to be affected by journeys; I keep reminding ds that he won't be doing that journey very often, it is the uni itself that is more important than the ease of getting there and back -however I would be lying if I don't think myself very easily swayed by journey experiences-

Ursula wow I am so impressed your dd is driving herself to offer day. I can't even drive ds to offer days let alone him drive himself...we seem to be an very clueless family.

I'm feeling exhausted again today. Ds is up till all hours washing his clothes and walking up and down the stairs, the stress of hearing him NOT going to sleep and then having to get him up the next day (this morning he had to be in school by 8am) Today I just feel like a zombie. I want to organise things but then just feel drained. Downstairs is hoovered. There is food. Going to try and tackle the enormous pile of laundry next from dd's ski-ing trip with school. And all the papers gsce/a level/sixth form/uni..we are drowning!!!!