Why don't young people foster?

[Vineling]

We've been having a discussion in the office today, (I recruit foster carers as my day job) about why it's people who are aged 50 plus who in the main foster. Those who teenagers have flown the nest and gone off to Uni. So my question is why don't younger people consider fostering? instead of perhaps going back to work after a baby or as a career choice? and what can we do to encourage them to consider it? We need people of all ages over 21 with a spare bedroom but it's the younger ones we struggle to reach and encourage to foster.

I wanted to get real people’s feedback not the assumptions I have made. But everyone’s feedback has echoed my knowledge.

I fostered in my 30’s and it was interesting to say the least, but I’m glad to have done it. Much more recently I worked in a children’s home and I wouldn’t have trusted a single one of the children in my own house. Instances of theft, violence and traumatic false accusations against a member of staff who had to be instantly suspended - no thanks. I had sympathy for the circumstances that led the children to behave like this, but not enough to potentially ruin my own life.

I would love to but I thought young people weren't eligible? Don't they usually want experienced parents or more mature people?

Is it not the case you can't work another job but be available full time for fostering?

Not sure how many young people have no employment and a bedroom to spare.

OP you didn't quote or tag whoever you're replying to.
Why did you put those weird photos in your post?

I don’t think many people would want to foster while parenting a young family, and honestly in most cases it probably wouldn’t be helpful for their kids.

Those that do space is probably an issue.

I'm a Foster Carer. I've fostered the DC we care for from the age of 5 and he's now 17 1/2. My own DC were late teens and in 20's when we first went through the fostering assessment. The DC we care for has learning disabilities. I was a secondary teacher for 25 years so I had a lot of experience in dealing with DC who were not my own. I carried on teaching part time when DC was in primary school and my DC worked longer days and had 2 half days off to care for DC. I can confirm all the other Foster Carers at the agency I work for are older. One couple are in their early 40's but the rest are late forties or older. Not many young people have a spare bedroom. You have to be able to take DC to school and collect them which wouldn't fit with many jobs. The fostering allowance has got higher over the last 3-4 years but much of it is spent on the DC and rightly so. Most DC in care have complex needs and many have suffered emotional traumas so they need calmness and a lot of patience but you also have to be firm and put in boundaries which some of these DC have not had before so find it difficult. If you foster your own DC have to learn to share their parents. This is why we waited until my youngest son was 17. Also my now adult sons have been really good role models for DFS. It can be difficult at times but it is hugely rewarding when you see your DFC learn to trust you and when they feel really secure they begin to flourish. It takes time and you have to show them you won't give up on them. We love our FS, he's part of our family and he gets treated exactly the same as my own DC. We'll gift him a deposit for his own home when we feel he is ready to live alone, just as my own boys were. We save a lot of the fostering allowance which will enable us to do that for him. Many carers have to use the fostering allowance to live on, especially if they don't go out to work.

Easy. Look at how difficult it is to get a property nowadays. Nevermind that spare bedroom!

We were briefly emergency foster carers in another country. We would like to foster again in the future, DH grew up in an environment where kinship care and informal foster arrangements were the norm. I am a SAHM so the money isn't very relevant to us.
However, I would never consider it in the UK. We're not likely to ever have a spare bedroom, the expectations are too high and disruption to our own kids would be too great.

This.

Exactly this.

I couldn't continue my career if I foster. I need my career, though it doesn't pay enough to have a spare bedroom. I'll probably be 40 before I do have a spare room. But then I'll need my career to pay the mortgage. So I'll be 50 before I can afford to reduce my hours enough to foster.

It's a dumb system based on outdated SAHM ethos and doesn't lead to the best people fostering.

There was no way I could have worked while I was fostering. The foster child's needs have to come first, even before your own child's needs. There were constant meetings, with your own social worker, the child's social worker, school etc all in day time. Also contact had to be facilitated with the birth family. When you have a baby to foster this can mean you driving to a contact centre every week day so the parent can spend time with their child. You can't guarantee that the child is going to be near you. On one occasion the drive was over an hour each way, so at least 3 hours taken each contact time. We weren't allowed to have holidays without the foster child coming with us either, as our agency stopped doing holiday cover.

You’re a real life angel and your DFC is so lucky to have you, I’d love one day to be able to offer the same to a child in need x

@Twinsmamma, I'm no angel and both DH and I really I love having DFS to care for. He's come on so much and we are really proud of him. He has overcome having a truly terrible start in life. Because of his learning disability he has to work so hard for even small improvements. He works harder than any of my DC did. He has a 1-1 tutor 2 or 3 times a week and never complains it uses up his freetime. Over the last year he has come out of his special school and been to a mainstream college on a sports course. He has been given a 1-1 helper but really he is surprising even us with what he is achieving. I think he was perhaps held back/over protected at his special school. Now he has just a little bit more independence and he loves it. The reward in seeing him improve so much is huge for us. We expect he will stay with us for probably another 8-10 years. We'll be too old to take another FC then but we have loved him sharing our life with us.

What is it? Can you give some actual figures of what the allowance is?

Your OP seems disingenuous in suggesting that people might consider fostering as an alternative to paid work!

I get about £200 a week per child as my fee and about £200 as the child's allowance.

Fostering is not a job. Its your whole life. that's exactly it, AmyandPhilipfan

When I went into fostering nearly 10 years ago there was the expectation that one of a couple gave up their job to be a stay at home carer, so I did just that, while my husband stayed in his job. In the last few years that rule has been relaxed a lot and I'm not sure how I feel about that. Once children have been with you a while and settled with you then that's one thing if you go out to work, but I think it's different when children first come to you. Then I think it's important for them to have the same person picking them up at a normal time after school and dropping them off in the morning. And to be around all weekend and holidays.

It's a heck of a lot of responsibility and if you go with LA, you don't get a wage, so no placement means no income.
Where I live, most FC are older and have moved into the area, with money in the bank. They don't need the money as such.
Young people, young familes need dependable wages you get from careers to pay bills.
Too much of a gamble I would say, in-between placements would be a huge worry, and the threat of removal because of aligations.
I was a FC and DH had a full time job. My friend on the other hand was a single FC, on some benefits.

I can imagine they had to ‘relax’ the requirement to give up paid work in order to increase the (small) pool of people willing to provide foster care.

For the needs of the DC or young person, a household with the single adult or both adults doing paid work is presumably often better than the available alternatives.

There is no way I could do another job as well as be a foster carer.
Today for example, I took my child to school, home at 9.20. Had a review meeting at 12.00 which lasted nearly 3 hours, then had to collect my child from school.
Last week I had three meetings with social workers.
Next week I have a meeting with my SW and a consultation with a therapist.
Then it's half term so he is with me the whole week. In the summer I have him the whole 6 weeks.
On top of the day to day running of the home, I have weekly reports to write, I take him to contact visits with a parent, and two siblings, all separate, letterbox with siblings who are adopted. I have mandatory training to do with regular refreshers.
Not sure where I would fit in another job.

I’m a foster carer and the thought that all you need is a spare room is the reason carers are leaving.
weve fostered for 12 years, the same child. My youngest are late 20s and there’s no way they would foster.
They earn more than me, have lovely holidays, sick pay, weekends to themselves, their lives are their own. A foster carers life is second to the child in their care.
You are caring for traumatised children, often with special needs, you are a nurse, therapist, teacher, advocate, mentor, cook, cleaner and the financial rewards are awful.
If I were young there’s no way I would do it, given my time again I wouldn’t do it but our child came really young and became part of our family.
I worry about the future as I think it’s going to become much harder to recruit carers.

We started fostering when my husband and I were both 26 and had two birth children under five. Add in two more birth children, another four we adopted and we are just returning to foster again now in our forties. We have remained in touch with many of our fosterlings and would absolutely do it all again without hesitation

Are you recruiting on here?