How to Make the Very Most of Your Body and all of its Fluids

[EarthWindandFire]

Hello.
I am currently writing a book which I thought may interest some of you.
I am a very natural lady and a believer that nothing should go to waste. There is a use for everything our body produces. I wondered if any of you mothers have any contributions you could make or any comments on whether you would be interested in buying such a book.

Examples include the health benefits of drinking your own urine (of which there are many).

Freezing your menstrual blood to use as stock or a natural thickener to gravy. It is full of protein and has a rich, meaty flavour.

Recycling your faeces to use as compost for your organic vegetable garden.

There really is nothing your body produces that you cannot use in some way and this is the aim of my book. I would appreciate your comments.

How about the smelly stuff that comes out of your earring holes? Can I use that to clean the bathroom?

I am in discussions with the founding people of Mumsnet to donate my book as prizes. We are thinking of the competition to be photographs of Mumsnetters doing something inventive with their bodily fluids. All photos once submitted, will be the property of myself and I reserve the right to use them as publicity for my book.

snot... nope. you lost me at snot, surely there would be a more scientific name. nasal mucoid excreta?

or whataloadofhystericalbolleaux

Remind me not to enter any competitions in the near future

What will the book be made of? surely you will be using some bodily organism as paper? and will you be putting baby diahorria(sp?) to use for the ink?

Reactivated semen?

Like Zombie semen?

Well vinegartits, I didn't like to say, but I know a few people with psoriasis too and they have kindly donated.

that stuff you get out of your piercings smells like cheese. you could use it as a primula cheese spread substitute.

Scatologic self painting competition entry

Please note I will be VERY dissapointed if this book is not published.

You could use reality's naval gunk to keep the pages moist, i imagine dried skin would go crispy otherwise?

i was going to say for vegans but they wouldn't eat it would they?

OMGoodness- this is so funny, so utterly gross, but so funny.
pmsl

Is that you sagacious? Very fetching.

The photographs have to be of a Mumsnetter - so your Mumsnet name is needed. It must show you doing something inventive with either your own bodily fluid or someone else's.

Reality, are you talking about dragonbutter?

Naval gunk, VT - a whole shipload?

I can piss on another MNers herb garden for the pics if you like?

I will allow you to title it "sagacious" The bodily fluids are all mine. I draw the line at someone elses shit

[prim]

Actually urine isn't very good for herbs, too acidic. But if you made lemonade out of it and took a photo of you giving it to the children to try, that would count.

Habbibu yes your right, reality's alone would not be enough, we would all have to contribute naval gunk, or maybe toenail grease?

Isn't that child abuse, making them drink your urine? Shouldn't they drink their own?

Actually, I've only just realized that Soupdreggon is an easter name. I thought she was just going for the ultra-posh thing.

pmsl just goes to show i know nothing about gardening

Please send your photographs to Mumsnet HQ.

its you isnt it bof?