LinkedIn chat about men bringing their dd into women’s loos

[thetinsoldier]

As above. He says he doesn’t want to take her into men’s loos, what should he do? Cue lots of women saying it’s fine, come into our loos, we don’t mind at all.

I said he should find a family loo or unisex loo, or take her into the men’s. He doesn’t want to, says he wouldn’t be using the loo. I said that he’d still be there, and that many women need single sex spaces for religious or other reasons, plus it’s the law.

He’s just said it seems to be the consensus that he should use the women’s loos.

Why are some men so selfish?

What else can I say?

It's not a vote, if even one woman feels uncomfortable about it, that should be enough of a reason - his feelings don't trump a woman's in this situation. These spaces belong to all of us, not just the women who agree with him.

I disagree. I think most women really would mind.

I think most women would not mind, if the daughter was too young to tend to herself, and it wouldn't be acceptable for her dad to wait outside,.
A little understanding would be more likely.

Not sure if there was some misunderstanding in my post earlier. But legally, a father does have the right to take his young daughter into a Ladies toilet, unless of course the shop/venue does not allow it.
It's their property, their rules.

But legally, a father does have the right to take his young daughter into a Ladies toilet, unless of course the shop/venue does not allow it.

Where on earth do you get that from? Men should take their young daughters in the men's, women (and only women) should take their young sons in the ladies'. Men do not have a legal right to use the ladies' for any reason.

What right is that then? Do please quote the law in this. Would be very interested to see it. Why should he not take her into the men’s? Why does his want to take his child into the ladies trump women’s right to a single sex space?

There is no law (that I am aware of) that forbids a father taking his young daughter into a public ladies loo in the UK.
If anyone can show me an updated law that says this isn't so, I will stand corrected.

It’s not about him and his rights, it’s about the right of a female child not to have to go into a room where adult male strangers are openly pissing.

As an adult woman my comfort is less important than the comfort of a child.

It is about the parents' right to do what is best for their young child.

So yes, in this instance, if a female toilet user objects, she has less legal rights than the male parent and child.

Go and read some threads on here outside of this sub forum. Youll find that the consensus is generally that people were happy for a father to take their daughter into the ladies after shouting through the door.

You might not individually agree with that, but you don’t control ladies toilets. If you find yourself in that situation and you’re not ok you say please wait till I’m out. It’s not rocket science.

The daughter and you have equal rights to be able to use the facilities designated for their gender.

Surely a little common sense should come into play.
But if a woman seriously objects, she can either wait till he exits with the child, voice her discomfort directly to him and ask him to leave, (he doesn't have to), or go to the venue's management and complain.

Oh come on. Let's get this the right way round - if he doesn't want his daughter to use the men's with other men there, he can wait till the other men exit and then take her in, right?

Women's toilets are for women. He shouldn't be in there.

The girl has a right to use them. Women have a right to use them. The girl's dad DOES NOT. It's that simple.

Really? Which law states that then? Please quote the statute stating this. Seems very er… specific

So hold on, it’s not ok for a girl to be in the same toilets as men if it’s in the men’s, but it’s ok for a girl to be in the same toilets as men if it’s in the women’s? How does that make sense?

He isn't using the ladies toilet, his daughter is....and maybe for some reason the gents toilet is unsuitable in some way.

As it's bothering you so much, you quote a law that says I am wrong.

The dad isn't using them.

Remind him that by using the ladies toilet he is denying his daughter the right to have a single sex space when she is older and that she will have to share the toilet with any random man who thinks he has a good reason to use the space in the future.

Random men will never be able to use a woman's toilet just because he thinks he has a good reason.
That's silly.

I'm a woman. I struggle to wait

I am very uncomfortable with men in women's spaces

he should be taking his child to the men's.

So you have 2 more options.

I am very much against men in women's spaces, but this is one situation where I would not mind. I wouldn't want a little girl going into the men's.

Has it been mentioned yet that some mens toilets are disgusting?
Ask the menfolk if you have never had the pleasure of straying into any yourselves.

People are so self-entitled nowadays. No doubt the ones vehemently against a dad helping his toddler in the ladies, are also tutting if a dad goes into an empty disability toilet.

Then he has no right to be in there does he?

Why? She’s with her dad. What do you think is going to happen to her? Besides, he could always shout before going in couldn’t he? Give everyone a heads up,