A "real man" treats a woman like a princess!

[everychildmatters]

If my husband "treated me like a princess" that would be the end of our marriage! I absolutely expect to be treated with respect, but not like some sort of fragile and needy person simply because I'm female!
Why do so many women feel the need to be "looked after" as if they are a child? To me, it screams subservience (but perhaps I am reading more into this than I should do?)

Yes plenty controlling women out there too 😊

@Blackbookofsmiles1 If it works for the both of you I guess. In what ways would you say you contribute?

@Eagle2025 I couldn't agree with you more.

Me too.. although i probably do need looking after a bit! He does everything for me and enjoys it.

Why would she need to be told if that’s what she wants in the first place? It sounds like you are making up a scenario or script that doesn’t exist?

Hmm, I think we're redefining it away from the typical usage here tbh.

Being 'treated like a princess' doesn't usually mean being 'equal to her prince'. It's usually used by women that want a man to run around after them paying for everything and worshipping the ground they walk on. It's sort of the female version of the bloke that wants a woman that will 'shut up and do the dishes'.

@GimmeMyM0ney This. It's clearly unacceptable for a man to treat a woman like this, but is it seen as more acceptable if it's the woman doing so? Dictating what her husband can and can't do because that's how she wants things? And then perhaps hiding under the guise of well that's the role of a "real man"?

I still dont really understand what your trying to get at. No one should be dictated to regardless of sex. That's obvious. And a 'real man' whatever that actually is, would never be a doormat.

@Eagle2025 Actually, I think women are as guilty of it as men by defining typical gender roles to suit their agenda. A woman should not expect a man to take out the bins or change a light bulb any more than a man should expect her to wash the dishes or cook his meals.

Yes, I think both are kind of playing up to the sexist stereotypes of the woman as housekeeper and man as provider. Some people want to keep the bits that suit them. Like women that want to work full time whilst still being bankrolled by a man, and men that want their wife to do all the chores despite the fact that she's sharing the financial burden too (unlike the days when he'd have gone out to work and she'd have looked after the house/kids or worked part time).

Tbh (and I'll probs be flamed for this) most women you see on dating sites claiming they want to be 'treated like a princess' are usually a bit Vicky Pollard looking. 😆

This thread gets ever more confusing. You initially said a 'Princess' was someone who was subservient and child like. Now you are suggesting they are manipulative and secretly calling the shots. Which is it?

'A woman should not expect a man to take out the bins or change a light bulb any more than a man should expect her to wash the dishes or cook his meals.' It's perfectly acceptable for people to expect these things of their partner if that is how both are comfortable splitting the tasks.

My husband does the typically male DIY jobs anything from changing a fuse, wiring lights or getting up a ladder to fix broken guttering. The general property maintenance. I would find it very unattractive to have a man that wasn't a handy man.

The whole "Princess" thing I find very offputting. I don't think they're imagining Princess Anne when saying this.

I neither want nor need to be looked after, we have a very equal relationship, though I would say I'm better organised. Both of us can do practical stuff.

@DoyalikeDags Do you think your husband would find it very unattractive if you didn't do "women's work" then?

Pethaps your view of Princess is wrong. Princess is not weak needy and fragile. Princesses can be and often are, strong intelligent women.

I want to be treated with respect and an equal bit worshiped or put on a pedestal. If that equals princess then great

@everychildmatters

i do however expect dh to change the bulbs because he’s 6ft tall and can do it without fetching the steps from the kitchen, the flip side is i do the washing because i am the one with the delicate cycle stuff and am fussy with settings, a fair exchange (he’s free to peg out the washing however and irons my clothes!)

I know what you mean. I like a man who is good at practical things. I think of them as competent. I would find it a bit off putting if he didnt want to get up a ladder to fix something kind of stuff. Might not ever say it out loud but I think it.

Princesses are people who are given something by dint of birth, not because they have worked for something . You are not a princess by merit. It isn’t a role you apply for

colloquilly a princess is someone with ideas above their station , who wouldn’t be prepared to get their hands dirty , someone shallow and self centered

so on either count I wouldn’t want to be treated like a princess. I would like respect for who I am , my achievements , and my flaws.

I don’t want to be trapped on a pedestal or Displayed in a guilded cage.

There is nothing wrong with you wanting a “handyman” or you wanting to bake all the cakes

but there is a lot wrong on thinking that’s what all women want , or in thinking that your daughters and sons would naturally follow those traditional lines

in our home - I am tech advisor , but if the screw is stuck DH provides the grunt - under my direction. We work well together. We both bake.

As a high earning, high achieving (good grades, good education, good career history, good salary, good car, good family, good health, good fitness (I can compete with many men in my gym!) I absolutely want my husband to take the wheel. It’s not “being a princess”, in the “weak” way you describe. I can take the bins out, I can do the gardening and I’ve done it plenty of times but if he says “go inside and don’t get your hair wet or get cold, I’ll bring the shopping in out the car” I’m not insecure enough to feel the need to “prove myself” as being able to go toe to toe with him on EVERYTHING to not accept the kind gesture and start unpacking the bags inside where it’s dry.

if a woman allows her husband to completely remove her of all thoughts, skill and personal self worth because she’s some dolly then yes I’d agree - keep yourself sharp etc - but in terms of letting me sit back and he carries the bag/goes to the bar/empties the bins?? Absolutely - he knows I can do it myself and doesn’t make me help unless I insisted!! (I do my fair share elsewhere - not a complete spoiled brat!) 😂

My husband treats me very well. He prioritises me in all he does and thinks of me as himself. Why should I not want that? I don’t want a selfish partner. The whole point of being in a relationship is that you look after each other surely?

@butterdish93 Providing you prioritise your husband too in all you do then no, that's not selfish.

I used to work with a woman who was always going on about finding a man who would treat her like a princess.
Her favourite TV show was Love Island and her ideal scenario would be to find a man who would earn enough that she could spend all day shopping, having beauty treatments and going to spas, as well as taking her on holiday and buying her handbags and the like.
I had to hear all the drama about her on-off boyfriend not being up to scratch.
She was 35 and no closer to finding such a mythical man.

Probably, as he loves my cooking and works many more hours than I do so it would be lazy if I didn't keep on top of housework.