Imagine this, let's say you are a 15-20 years old, you are alienated from many of your peers and by your society, you struggle intensely with making friends and especially attracting girls, you start falling into a real deep and dark pit of despair, you start losing hope about your situation, become desperate to figure out what's wrong with you, you, as a young alienated man in the 21st Century turn to the internet for advice and answers. While there, you probably first encounter women or average people lacking your issues who give you incredibly weak advice prone to failure, "be nice", "befriend the opposite sex", "read feminist literature and unpack your privilege and entitlement", etc. When this fails maybe you next encounter the "red pill" PUA community, they tell you the problem is that you are just weak, pathetic, you need to man up and you probably need to accumulate wealth despite being a young man in a terrible economy.
As time goes on and the advice either fails or is non-actionable, the two sides increasingly exaggerate their criticisms of you, as you grow bitter the first faction you encountered begin telling you what a terrible person you are, how you deserve to be alone and hopefully always will be, how society owes you nothing and your own frustration proves you deserve your lot in life and you would be happy with social alienation if not for your entitlement and their only real concern is making sure you don't become "a danger"; it becomes achingly clear these people never cared about you even remotely and saw you almost like a stray dog, either you get tamed or sent to the pound. Meanwhile the advice of the other faction, effectively to be an asshole, continues to be flatly unactionable and undesirable to you, and as such they compound in your head what a weak and failed man you are.
At this point you're pretty low, and are being kicked while you're down, you're still alone, still with few or no friends, incredibly miserable. Then one day you encounter a group of men who reach their hand out to you, tell you it's okay, they experienced many of what you went through and that they do not see you as a future monster or as weak, they will accept you, unconditionally, they will let you experience your hurt and your frustration, they will not try forcing a plan of action into you like PUA types, and unlike feminists they won't stop you from feeling the fullness of your despair and your anger, you are not a pawn to them, not a tool, you are simply you, and that is all they want you to be. And beyond that, they want the best for you, want you to escape your loneliness, escape your despair. They take you and bring you into a community of other men deep in despair like your own. Many people say boys and men choose to join those communities, it is more accurate to say those communities choose them. That was how things were when I first encountered these people, as a 16 year old kid, back in 2014. For the first time in my life I was granted absolute acceptance and permitted to feel what I felt without judgement.
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Now, don't get me wrong, these communities are like heroin for a young man, the opening pitch gets you absolutely hooked but once you are addicted it destroys you. The PUAs and feminists got me to hate who I am, incels and black pillers got me to hate what I am, and in the end they all left me wanting to die, perhaps the black pill most of all. What I say is not, therefore, an endorsement but an explanation, I see many online seemingly refusing to understand why young men are in these places, they refuse to understand the loneliness so many are trapped in, their frustration with their circumstances, and their desperation for unconditional acceptance from someone that understands their predicament and can empathize with them. Even now when I am no longer an incel, have a loving girlfriend, have had quite a few girlfriends and casual encounters, I still sympathize with these young men. I can remember what it was like, to have a hand finally extending and being told if I take it i will never be judged. These communities were not always what they have become, radicalized into disturbing madness, hatred, and a hunger for blood. Why do liberals refuse to understand?
Some insight from a poster dragged into this kind of world.