Tiny skirts and arsed hanging out

[mooshed]

I know it's always been a thing, why is it? Why do girls want to show their bums? Is it for the boys? And just generally all the makeup and boob jobs etc. Help me understand as my dds skirt is getting shorter each day, still not up to her arse thankfully.

I hate it but I also feel like I'm being a prude or something, they can dress how they want etc but I don't believe this is what they really want, is it? To be looked at as objects?

My teenage daughter is a lesbian and she wears the ridiculously short skirt for school because she likes them, not to be objectified or attractive to boys.

I find it slightly odd that we still frame these discussions as being about men and boys and what they like, as if girls only ever wear clothes or do things to impress the opposite sex.

Tbf, if your daughter is a lesbian she's probs not doing it to impress the opposite sex. Far more likely she's trying to look attractive to other girls, which isn't really that different.

Or maybe she just likes wearing shorts skirts? Not everyone is obsessed with what other people think.

Or maybe she just likes wearing shorts skirts? Not everyone is obsessed with what other people think.

That is why I wear them. They may attract disapproving looks from women or, horror of horrors, the “male gaze” but it’s not something I spend any time fretting over.

Fwiw with uniforms and PE kits these are generally options rather than what they have to wear. Girls are generally allowed to wear the 'boys' uniform if they want. My dd always did. Girls who wear the more minimalist stuff are generally the girls that want to. Often peer pressure, but imo unless its winter, then when you take away body confidence issues, its far more comfortable to wear short stuff when exercising anyway. Modesty in sports is stifling

Women tend to sexualise themselves rather than men

shut up

The nesting quotes thing has confused me a little bit to whoever it was who says she used to roll her skirt up at school, we did that too - and it was a girls’ school. We’d roll them up and stretch out to try to get a tan 😂

Why does she have to be impressing or attracting anyone? It says a lot more about you and how you think/feel about yourself than it does about a young lesbian in a miniskirt.

Its a nightmare trying to find school skirts once girls reach high school age. The options are somewhat restricted to why my DD calls “babyish skirts” with pleats or arse revealing tube skirts. Maybe if shops offered different options more girls might wear something else and maybe then adults would stop assuming they’re trying to attract others with compulsory uniform choices.

Of course it's peer (and societal) pressure. That's my point. We tell girls at the age of 4, that wearing super short shorts is "normal" for girls when doing sports and then act surprised when at 14 they think super short skirts and shorts are the best way to dress.

And with all due respect, short tight stuff probably is more comfortable when exercising, but when we're talking about a bunch of 6 year olds running around at PE, I don't think it's relevant. Not least because if it was... the boys would also be wearing the super short/super tight stuff. But they're not. And they don't until they get to a much higher level of elite sport.

I watched a bunch of girls coming into school today wearing PE kit. They were all freezing. Goose bumps all up their legs. Of course it's optional - some, like DD, were wearing trackies or long shorts - but as a society, we create this idea that short stuff is normal so we can't be surprised that they then wear it.

People say you can wear what you want. But if I put on a nike crop top and hotpants and went to the local corner shop it would be awful and I'd get comments on the way there.

I domt think 6 year olds PE kits are any different between the sexes though.
I do have issue with sexualisation of children and women being sexualised and sexualising themselves, but in my opinion, the issue with school skirts is that school uniforms and schoolgirls are openly and routinely sexualised and mostly dont look nice, dont fit well on so many body types. School skirts are almost always a horrible unflattering length, and its an age when theyre all getting interested in style and fashion and yes, some of them might be trying to attract others, but that doesnt mean that it deserves all the outrage or the implication from many that they are sexually precocious or want attention from adult men.

I think a hell of a lot of girls roll their skirts up in an attempt to make their school uniform look a bit more casual and trendy. To make them look a bit more rebellious.
In most of europe, schoolkids are going into school in jeans and tshirts. They arent going in daisy duke booty shorts. Its very specifically a school uniform thing in the UK since forever.

English girls with their tiny skirts are actually very modest. Up here they are out in the sun wearing leggings that look as if they were sprayed on and no skirts. Their backsides stretch the leggings material so far that absolutely everything is on display. It's bad enough when they are standing still but when they start walking the buttocks start moving independently. It is horribly fascinating.
Where are their mothers in this? Why aren't they stopping their daughters leaving the house like that?

Because leggings are cheap, comfortable and practical maybe? Maybe the mothers prefer to choose their battles ?

Plenty of girls do it because they realize that it's highly sexualized and that is what they want. If you query schoolgirls about it they will almost always claim they don't, but lots of them are fibbing because who wants to say that to mum or other adults?

Some are doing it because it's the fashion and they are more naive and honestly don't realize it's highly sexualized to others, because it isn't to them.

The narrative that it's for themselves is a red herring in a way, maybe it is, but it's still clothing designed to present them as sexual objects, and choosing that over something that doesn't do that isn't a meaningless choice.

they arent framing it in the same way as adults do though. The sexual objectification of children and schoolgirls by adults is not the fault of the girls themselves who are trying to find their identity in the world. Look fashionable to their peers. Rebel a bit against the adults. The reality is that most girls do not want to be noticed by adult men, and are grossed out when it happens.
They are just existing and navigating the culture around them. People so often seem to project adult intentions onto quite young girls. Assume that they are flirting or trying to be sexy.
My dd is gay and quite masculine in appearance so she avoids a lot of male attention, but her last girlfriend was quite girly and liked short skirts and fishnets and makeup etc, but was still only 14. I was actually genuinely upset at the amount of adult men who would approach her. It used to frighten her a bit. She was just playing around with fashion. If you spend time with girls that age, generally its pretty clear they are still kids and just playing.
Yes there are wider issues around why girls clothes is skimpier than boys clothes, but less coverage, doesnt have to automatically mean trying to be sexy.
People sexualise girl children even in very normal childrens clothes. They sexualise girl children even more the older they get, and especially the more summery and skimpy the fashions become, but this is not the girls issue to solve by only dressing suitably modestly.
Hardly surprising that teenage girls havent all discovered feminism yet, and even if they have/do, it doesnt mean they all will want to wear modest clothing or not care about what they look like and fitting in.

I think teenage girls get SUCH a hard time about their appearances and the way they dress. Mostly you can tell these girls are children, so i think safest to assume that actually they dont want sexual attention, any more than a girl playing with dolls wants to be impregnanted.

Because they're teens & kicking back just as it should be. I'd like to think most of these young women do it for themselves, because they can. Though I think there's a big dose of fitting in too

DD went out last week with her nipples showing through her dress, DH commented that she might want to put something on under her dress. He response "I paid good money for these piercings & I love them, do you really think I'm going to hide them" all power to her I say. Different times, but I love that they are so liberated in that way

I also liked to wear skimpy clothes when young, I absolutely didn't do it for boys attention, but I enjoyed clothes & fashion, I'm sure I also got the Pearl clutches discussing my skimp clothes, but just like DD I couldn't give a flying fuck

You need to lighten up, times have changed

"I paid good money for these piercings & I love them, do you really think I'm going to hide them"

So she would appreciate it, if they got looked at ? minefield.

So she would appreciate it, if they got looked at ? minefield

Oh I agree, but at 19 we don't have a say. Anything you try & say to them about that sort of stuff these days is twisted into "victim blaming" that said, she's pretty bloody fierce at dealing with letches & does cover up for work, & college/uni etc, so I guess it's her call & she deals well with fallout

""...My teenage daughter is a lesbian and she wears the ridiculously short skirt for school because she likes them, not to be objectified or attractive to boys. She also wears crop tops too. It’s because it’s fashion. Maybe as middle aged mums we forget what that’s about?""

Im guessing women like to look at legs too? So the point is that dressing to attract people is still defined by current societal/ fashion norms, which is/are dictated by the patriarchy.

You can't outrun the Patriarchy, my friend.

I did it cos it looked sexy and I still dress, if I am going out out, in a way that conveys some sex appeal. I want to be admired I’m not going to lie. It’s fun.

Adolescents don't see how they are sexualising themselves to adults. It's most likely a fashion statement. Individuating from parents. Self expression. Teens aren't known for their reflective skills.

I think 15 year old girls think and know they’re sexualising themselves to boys around their age. That’s what I was up to, having been a 15 year old girl myself once. I wanted to be desired but not by some old man.

I think 15 year old girls think and know they’re sexualising themselves to boys around their age. That’s what I was up to, having been a 15 year old girl myself once. I wanted to be desired but not by some old man.

I think that's the nub of it and all right-thinking older men will realise they are not the intended target audience.